"Chris tells me your group is called the Screaming Gophers," the Taunter says.

"Well, I mean, technically, I'm a Killer Bass," Izzy said, "But I'm planning for a team switch. That Katie really misses her friend…"

"So wait, Katie and Sadie are on different teams?" the Taunter asked incredulously.

"I know," Izzy responded, "Hard to believe isn't it?"

The Taunter, after briefly being put off-guard by this exchange, shook his head vigorously. He then looked them in the eye, and said, "My name is none of your concern. You will not call me by my name."

"What is your name? Percy? Seymour? Maurice? Leslie?" Noah began to ask.

"Did you not hear what I said?" the Taunter asked. "I am known officially as the Taunter."

Everyone began to laugh. "The Taunter?" Cody asked, "I think I had that disease one time."

"Silence," the Taunter said, looking directly at Cody. "You don't think I know exactly how you think? You seriously want to get a girl, am I right?"

Cody quieted down and said, "Yeah, that's right."

"But not only are you too ugly, clumsy, and stupid to ever get a girlfriend…" he said, causing Cody to sweat visibly and bite his lower lip. "I don't even think you really want one in the first place."

"Wh-what?" Cody asked, "Wh-why would I want to get one, if I didn't want one?"

"Well, I don't know… maybe you're trying to hide your attraction to one of your other teammates."

"I don't know what you mean…" Cody said, pushing his fingertips together, "What, do you think I have a crush on Justin or something?"

"Not Justin," the Taunter said ominously, gesturing to Noah.

"No," Cody said weakly, "You're lying. Quit lying!"

He screamed and then fell to the floor in a fetal position and began sucking his thumb.

"Hey, that was uncalled for," Gwen said.

"Oh… was it, princess of the night? Or should I say… queen bee?" the Taunter asked.

Gwen was taken aback. The Taunter continued, "You do realize that this goth thing is super-mainstream now. You're not an individual… you're just… a poser!"

Gwen was very angry. "What?" she shouted, "A POSER? Trent, you don't agree with him, do you?"

Trent responded unconvincingly (from Gwen's point of view), "Of course not."

"Oh, that's really a nice thing to say," the Taunter turned to Trent as he said, then turned back to Gwen, "Too bad someone as boring and clone-like as you could never get such a rugged boyfriend."

Gwen started to cry, and ran as far out of the room as she was allowed.

"Listen, this isn't working, you're just making everyone too upset to do anything," Trent said.

"Oh, I'm sorry. That was my purpose, but I guess as a fad musician, you don't have enough brains to comprehend what my motives are," the Taunter said.

"Fad!" Trent asked, "You take that back!"

He then began to wrestle with the Taunter, when Leshawna told them, "Break it up! Break it up!"

"Why should I listen to you? You're black. I don't have to do anything you say," the Taunter said.

"Oh, you did not just go there," Leshawna said, taking away her position of neutrality and joining Trent. Finally, the Taunter was able to wriggle free, and headed over to his next target, Owen.

"Hey, Owen," the Taunter said, "You're fat."

Owen giggled. "Yeah, I know, right?"

"You eat way too much food and are going to die young," the Taunter continued.

"But I'll die happy," Owen said, smiling peacefully.

"But you don't seem to realize," the Taunter finished, "That by being so fat and dying so young, you'll never attract someone as handsome as Justin." Owen's eyes welled with tears.

"You mean… no chance… even if he does like guys?" Owen asked.

"That's what I mean, exactly," the Taunter responded.

Owen started running around the room and crying.

The Taunter approached Noah, who blocked him with his hand and said, "Trust me, you want to save me for last."

Deciding the warning possibly being true was more important than it possibly being false, the Taunter decided to go after Justin instead. He just walked by, and pretending to talk quietly so that Justin wouldn't hear, he said, "Well, I don't know about most of these kids, but that Justin is really ugly." When he saw Justin look up, he said, "Oh, hi, Justin, I didn't see you there." Justin dropped his head on the table and cried.

He quickly found Lindsay, Beth, and Heather. To Heather, he said, "I have never seen a bigger loser in my life!"

"What did you say?" Heather asked, getting angry.

"I mean, I won't blame the queen bee," he said, pointing to the crying Gwen in the corner, "For not wanting to be friends with you."

"Excuse me?" Heather asked. "I am the queen bee. Gwen is the loser."

"Oh, I'm sorry, Heather," the Taunter said, "I misspoke. You see, there is a bigger loser than you here." He pointed to Beth. "I mean, she's such a loser, she won't ever be cool."

"Not even if I get my braces off?" Beth asked.

"Not even then."

"Not even if I get contacts?" she continued.

"Ugh… especially not then. Then your ugly eyes wouldn't be obscured," the Taunter continued.

Beth froze up completely. Lindsay said, "Hey, don't be mean to my… friends…"

"Oh, I'm sowwy," the Taunter said condescendingly. "Did I make the big baby cwy?"

Lindsay asked, "Did you just call me a baby?"

"Well you're about as dumb as one," the Taunter said.

"Hey, that's not fair!" Lindsay said, "I don't poop on the floor."

"Ooh! Ooh! Get me!" Izzy said.

"Huh, I really don't have much to say. You're kind of bland, really," the Taunter said. Suddenly Izzy looked less happy, and quite upset.

"B-bland? I've never been called bland before! I'm always the weird chick, the crazy, the loon! Never bland!" Izzy shouted, jumping backwards and hitting her head on the table.

The Taunter stared at Noah for a bit, when the bookworm blurted out, "Try me."

"Okay, here it goes," the Taunter said, "You're a stupid idiot."

"Nice try," Noah responded.

"You're totally in love with…"

"Let me guess… a dork? A girl I hate? A guy? Heard it," Noah answered.

"You have no physical skills whatsoever!" he claimed.

"Like. I. Care."

His teammates watched this back-and-forth go on for several minutes until finally, it resulted in the following exchange: "You… have an ugly forehead."

"Blame my parents, not me," Noah responded, "Now are you quite finished with your childish attempts to offend me? I'm trying to read my book."

The Taunter turned white and ran out of the room. "Oh, yeah," Noah said, "I am good."

"Did you taunt all of the Screaming Gophers?"

"Succeeded on… ten… including… Izzy…excluding…Katie," the Taunter said and practically fainted.

"Ten?" Chris asked, "Why only ten? That's eleven."

"Noah… un…offended…to…the…end," the Taunter responded, just before passing out completely.

Chris groaned when he realized he could not dock the Taunter's pay.