-1Title: Understudy
Author: bikkothewriter
Pairings: None yet, leaning towards 1x2x1
Warnings: Language, Yaoi, Blood, (maybe squick depending on where the reviews and the muse lead me)
Disclaimer: I own nothing but the voices in my head and even they are suing for copyright infringement.
Summary: He's lived his life as Zero One's understudy. Now free of an evil doctor's machinations what will he make of his new life? (will work on random summary)
***
Chapter Two
The nightmare was only different in that he wasn't alone this time. Zero One lay beside him under the dusty and rickety bed, clutching tightly to his hand as he tried to control his breathing. They were both small, maybe five or six years old, hiding because the woman had hidden them, made them promise to keep quiet no matter what. Zero One's eyes shifted left and right agitated as he listened to the gunshots in the distance, hand squeezing tightly in worry.
The woman was praying, begging for someone to come and save them all, to make the horror outside the closed bedroom door stop as she moved the heavy dresser to barricade the door. Her hysterical crying scared him most. Hearing the fear in her voice as she did what she could to protect him and the newly added Zero One.
The banging started; the man in black combat boots was already at the door, breaking through the wood. He could hear it splintering, a piece of it skittering underneath the bed startling Zero One. He buried his face against the floor whimpering as it dawned on him what was about to happen.
The dresser shoved aside, the man in the black combat boots forced the woman back even as she screamed at him. The sound of flesh hitting flesh was deafening as the man in black combat boots knocked her to floor without a word or mercy. The blood was a bright red, a precursor, as it splashed across the floor from her broken nose. She tried to rise and the black combat boot was there against her back, pressing her into the floor.
She looked to them, from underneath the navy dust ruffle, her eyes pleading for them to stay quiet, to stay hidden even as the barrel of the shotgun pressed into the back of her head. The familiar click-click of the double barrel being cocked sounded and Zero One whimpered, watching. The flash was blinding, disorienting with its suddenness, the bang stifling Zero One's yelp.
It was the hot wash of blood and sharp bits of bones pelting their faces that woke them.
Zero looked across the bed to Zero One whose face was sweaty and pale. He dropped Zero's hand, scrambling away rubbing invisible blood from his face. Tangled in the sheets, the pain in his ribs hindering him he fell from the bed to the floor, rolling over, barely getting his feet underneath him as he dashed to the bathroom.
Zero watched the frantic Zero One for all of a moment before he followed behind him, crawling across the bed, his feet sure underneath him as he hurried to the bathroom. Turning on the light, he found Zero One on his knees, the raised seat clutched in both hands, heaving into the toilet, filling the bowl with a mix of blue serum and black vile.
"Are you alright?" he asked unnecessarily trying to muster concern for the other man.
"No…dream…nightmare," Zero One said gasping, voice echoing inside the bowl. "Who was that woman?"
"I don't know. It's just a dream," he told Zero One.
The recurring nightmare was one he had come to terms with a long time ago as being a mystery. He'd never had a woman hide him away underneath a bed, endangering her life to save his. He'd always assumed that it was a residual memory carried over from Zero One. The doctors had simply told him to ignore the dream. That it wasn't real and meant nothing. To let him affect him meant punishment and Zero was nothing if not a quick study.
"You've had it before."
"Yes."
"Why did I have it too?"
"A side effect of the serum?" he guessed. He had always been alone in his dream, the lone observer. Zero One joining him, becoming apart of the dream along with seeing it for himself was very new and not something he truly wanted to discuss.
He took the plastic wrapped cups from the sink's counter filling the cheap blue and red paper cup with water, passing it to Zero One. He accepted the cup washing his mouth out first before accepting a refill to drink. He set the cup on the back of the commode hands shaking, then flushed. He levered himself off the floor, sitting carefully on the closed lid exhausted.
"The compound. What happened?"
"I destroyed it," he explained simply. After questioning and then killing Faust, he had taken care of the rest of the staff. It had not taken them long to realize that he had gone rogue and had tried to oppose his and Zero One's escape and had been dealt with accordingly. He'd secured Zero One outside of the compound before going back inside setting the self-destruct on the compound, knowing that it would eradicate everything inside the underground bunker without causing harm to the asteroid.
"Everything?"
"There's nothing left but a burnt out shell."
"No," Zero One moaned, pained. He clutched his chest as he slouched obviously hurt by the news.
"What is it?" Zero asked confused by the reaction. Zero One had come to shut down the compound to stop Wing Zero from being recreated. He would have thought the man pleased to hear that he had taken care of the job for him.
"I was hoping to find something about my past. Where I came from. That was the last place."
"There was nothing on any of the computers or in Faust's files. Not even how or when I was cloned," he answered annoyed that Zero One would think him so sloppy as to not obtain any and all valuable information before he left the compound to its destruction..
"The serum. You said you didn't know the formula," Zero One accused.
Zero growled retracting his promise to be a good 'brother' deciding it would be better to kill Zero One to save himself from the other man's stupidity. "Faust made several different versions of the serum, all of them blue. Would you like a detailed list of all the ingredients used for the eight different combinations he made or would you prefer I go back and tell Dr. Ocean exactly how to make his own truth serum?"
"No," Zero One replied sullenly and Zero felt guilty for snapping at him.
"I need to check your eyes," he said lamely, leaving the room. He rummaged through the plastic bags searching for the penlight he'd stolen from the doctor, pausing as he came across the medical scissors. There was one glaring difference between himself and Zero One and he would need to rectify it immediately. With items in hand, he returned to the bathroom, dropping the scissors on the counter. He clicked the penlight on pointing it in Zero One's direction.
"Look at me," he said tilting Zero one's head up, shining the light in one then the other eye, watching the pupils narrow. "Your eyes look normal. I think the serum should wear off.
"Come on," he said, tossing the light onto the counter, "I'll take you back to bed."
"No. I don't want to sleep. I don't want to have another nightmare," he said, then looked up at Zero stricken, "I didn't mean to say that out loud."
"I think it's a side effect. You've said a lot of things I don't think you intended to say."
Zero One blushed a deep red and Zero considered the possibly of the serum hindering Zero One's control of his physical reactions along with his speech. He'd been raised to be emotionless. Anger, hatred, happiness, sadness were all weaknesses, things that would get him killed. The Zero One he'd met before the first injection had been what he always imagined of him, cold and unflinching, unbreakable. Six injections later and Zero was seeing the man underneath the training, behind the mask of a soldier, assassin and terrorist. It frightened him. If the effects of the serum were permanent, he couldn't possibly mimic such feelings and emotions when he had none himself.
He turned away from Zero One, deciding to focus on the things he could change and control. He ran the tap, unwrapping the small, black courtesy comb from its plastic wrapping, holding it under the water. Using the wet comb, he dampened his hair forcing the strands long and straight. Zero One watched with narrowing eyes as he picked up the angled medical scissors slicing through an uplifted section of hair.
"What are you doing?"
He resisted the urge to roll his eyes, attributing the stupid question to the serum. He was an exact copy of Zero One except for the hair. He had the long and chunky locks that Zero One donned through the war but the current Zero One had a much shorter, spikier cut that left his face open and his eyes framed by a dark fringe of bangs. Maintaining the old outdated look was unacceptable and would have been remedied earlier if not for Zero One's need of him.
"Why are you cutting your hair?"
"To match," he said, hoping that Zero One would stop asking him pointless questions.
"Why do you need to match me?"
"Because it's what I've always done."
"You can't be me. People will know the difference," he said arrogantly, the Zero One he'd come to mimic resurfacing and pissing him off just as much as the chatty version did.
"You think I can't be you," he asked angrily, bending down, getting in Zero one's face, not hiding his contempt. "You don't think I could trick everyone you know into believing I was you?"
"No. I have," and here he tried to stifle himself but the rest still came although warbled, "Distinctive scars."
Zero pulled his shirt off roughly, tossing it away, baring his scarred chest and arms to Zero One who paled his face a mixture of shock and grief. He reached out a trembling hand, touching the long shiny scar across his abdomen care of Branson and a hunting knife given to Zero One by an Alliance soldier. His hand trialed upwards to his right arm where the shiny rounded bullet wound lay. Duo Maxwell had shot Zero One; Faust had shot him.
"No," Zero One said struggling to his feet, grabbing him around the shoulders, forcing him to turn and reveal his ravaged back. It was his most hated scar, starting from his right shoulder spreading like an eruption down his back, angry rivulets of twisted and gnarled scar tissue. In his more delirious and pain-filled moments it looked very much like a sunburst, almost beautiful in its ugliness. He felt Zero One's fingers run along his scars, the touch ghost because his nerves were so badly damaged.
"Plastic," Zero One choked, "plastic surgery. Is that how they…?" Zero One began and Zero laughed humorlessly the sound biting to his own ears.
"Is that really how you think I got these scars?" he asked turning back to Zero One.
"No," he said and Zero could see that it pained him to do so. "Why? Why would they?"
"I'm replacement. Or I was."
"I'm sorry," Zero One said, voice cracking as he stared uselessly at his chest.
"Why are you apologizing?"
"They hurt you because me," he answered, "They hurt you because of me!"
"Zero One," he said softly, trying to calm the agitated man.
"I would have stopped them. I wouldn't have let them hurt you. I didn't know. I would have come sooner had I known," he ranted, voice rising as he went, charged full of emotion. "I wouldn't have let them hurt you like this. I wouldn't have let them do this. Please," he said looking up and Zero froze startled, "Believe me. I would have stopped them."
Zero One was crying.
His eyes were filled with blue tears, a watered down version of the serum that tracked down his cheeks as he clung to Zero's shoulders. He was overwhelmed by what he saw before him. Zero One was crying over him, over what he had had to suffer through. He had never imagined that anyone would cry over him, maybe as Zero One but never as himself.
Humbled he answered Zero One, "I believe you."
***
He'd spent the next hour blissfully alone, working on his hair as Zero One had wanted to go back to bed after his teary eyed rant. Zero imagined that it was quite strange and embarrassing for the other man to not have control over his emotions, to have his feelings pour out his mouth unrestrained. Had it been him, he too would have wanted to be alone after such a revealing moment.
Zero One sat propped against the bed's pillows sullenly, an ice pack pressed to his chest, watching a late night cop drama with volume turned low. Zero noticed he hadn't moved much since he'd put him back in the bed as he turned off the bathroom's light crossing the room to get in the bed beside Zero One.
They watched the screen, Zero quickly catching up on the plot. He couldn't imagine a scientist like Faust going to a crime scene to collect evidence while sharing witty banter with his colleagues but the group depicted were not stuffy and sadistic old men. In fact, two of them were women and Zero found himself wanting to see the blond woman named Willows on the screen over most of the other cast members. That was until Stokes was introduced and he determined that he could definitely stand to watch the show more often. Sitting crossed-legged, elbows on his knees face cupped in the palm of his right hand, he slouched comfortably enjoying the normalcy. He had not been afforded many opportunities to watch TV and he planned to enjoy as much of it as possible now that he was from under Faust's careful monitoring.
"Zero isn't a name," Zero One said after some time. "I don't like it."
He didn't answer as Zero One hadn't asked a question and hadn't told him something he didn't already know. Zero was a numbered designation given to him, though Faust had made a habit of telling him his name meant he was next to nothing until Zero One died.
"Are you going to kill me?" Zero One asked a few minutes later and Zero could not be bothered enough to turn away from the TV as he answered.
"Don't you think I would have done it by now?"
"No. You still need information from me. About my life."
"Is there a point to this conversation, Zero One?" Stokes and Willows were both on the screen and Zero One seemed determined to interrupt him from his new favorite hobby.
"Yes. That isn't my name."
"Neither is Heero Yuy," he countered, "The point?"
"I want you to call me by my name. I don't like being called Zero One."
"No, the point of this conversation," he explained.
"I want you to come with me but not if you're going to kill me later to impersonate me."
"Why would you believe me? I could easily lie to you to get what I want or ask you to tell me everything I want to know about you."
"I want to trust you. I want to help you."
"What would you do in my place? What would you do if you were me?"
"I'd kill you and take your place," he said sadly lowering his head as he forced to tell the truth which Zero appreciated. The serum did at least have some advantages.
"You'd kill me and take my place," he confirmed with a nod. "I'll be honest; I entertained the thought until I realized that you knew nothing about me. I believe what you said in there," he said nodding his head towards the bathroom. "I'm not going to kill you."
Zero One stayed silent after that and Zero wondered irritably why he couldn't have had that talk during the commercial break as none of the running advertisements were amusing. He had no need for a male enhancement drug, did not plan to buy a car, or want to go to a casino, though he would like some soda.
"I want you to be my brother," Zero One said just as the show came back on and Zero resisted the urge to sag in defeat.
"For how long?" he questioned hoping to have Zero One drop the topic and quickly.
"I don't understand the question," Zero One said after a slight pause.
"How long will you want me around before you change your mind about this?"
"There is no time limit. I…you…you could be my twin, my family. We could take care of each other."
"How long have you felt like this?" he asked, confused by Zero One's resolve. He was more lucid now than he was a few hours ago and he'd thought the man would have given up on the idea of them being a family. It seemed though that even cognizant and aware of the words coming form his mouth he still wanted Zero as a family member, meaning that it was not a serum induced want.
"As long as I can remember."
"And you want me to be your magic solution? Your family?"
"No. Yes," he said answering each question in turn. "Don't you want to have family?"
"I've gotten used to no one caring about me."
"That's not an answer," Zero One said, pushing.
"Yes," he said annoyed that Zero One was forcing the issue. Of course he wanted a family, to have a home and people who cared more about him than what he could do for them. "Yes, I want a family. Is that what you want to hear?"
"Yes."
"Well, it's too bad. We're not brothers. We're not related. You're my original and I'm you're clone. Thinking anything else is a waste of time."
"We are related and I don't know if I'm the original."
"What?" he said finally turning to look at Zero One head on. "What do you mean you don't know if you're the original?"
"I don't know where I came from. I don't know if I'm not a clone too. J would never tell me. He said it was not important to the mission."
That was new information and meant a great deal to Zero. He'd assumed that Zero One had been an orphan taken in by J, or at least that was the story Faust had told him, but realizing that he may not be the only clone in the equation, that Zero One's past was as shadowed as his was a new and auspicious discovery. He suddenly felt closer, more connected to Zero One imagining him as a clone. It made him just as much a pawn as Zero had been, created for someone else's use.
"Okay," he said, deciding that if he could survive self-destructing he could survive being Heero Yuy's twin. He turned back to the TV, to Nick Stokes in particular, hoping that he hadn't missed too much.
"You'll stay with me?"
"Yes. Now let me watch the show."
***
First, a Second Disclaimer: I do not own CSI but love Catherine and Nick.
Second, I have only a vague idea of where this story is going so feel free to tell me what you'd like to see happen.
Third, reviews ring my bell, so feel free to send them my way.