~When you're all alone,
and you need a light,
someone to guide you through the night,
just remember that I am here,
to hold you close and dry your tears.~

Part Two: Picking up the Pieces

It's a little after three when she wakes according to the blue LCD clock beside his bed. He bolts upright to see her crunched into a ball, knees tightly pressing against her chest as if she is trying to crawl into herself, sobs racking her body. Her eyes are open but she doesn't seem to see him as Lucas perches in front of her after fumbling with his bedside light, casting the shadows out of the room.

"Peyton. It's okay. Peyt. He repeats her name, when she looks through him. And he suddenly feels so very stupid, he thought that he had saved her that night, that the danger was behind them when the real danger was the broken girl in front of him and he doesn't know which words to say to make the pieces fit, to make her his Peyton again. "Please." His voice cracks and there are no more words.

She closes her eyes, trying to block out the sound of Lucas' voice, so desperate to just save her, to fix this. There is no fixing this, no fixing her- not really. She knows that this has changed her, Lucas was right, he won but she cannot do anything to stop it. Her eyes open slowly, taking in Lucas' steady blue gaze, as he crouches on the floor at the end of the bed, his eye line level with hers. There is so much concern in his eyes that the tears start flowing again, catching on her cheeks and rolling with soft plops down on to her folded arms.

"Peyton, please." Lucas repeats and she knows he is asking to let him in, to let him help her. This is her Lucas, a white knight, always, but the darkness is not a foe he cannot beat, it lives in her heart, concealing the silver lining from her view, hiding the path out of this terror, destroying her fragile hope that life is good.

She closes her eyes again, demons in her mind eye and she wants to tell Lucas how she hates that he saved her, hates that he went into that school because he lost Keith that fateful day and now? Now it doesn't matter, saving her meant nothing because she is a broken doll, pinned in by fear, destroyed by anxiety. She wants to live but she isn't living, she is surviving, clinging the ledge of her sanity by the tips of her raw fingers, bloodied from the fight, the fight to simply be. And it seems a waste that Lucas lost a man that was more than a father to him so she could slip further and further into the shadows. But she doesn't know how to tell him this so she opens her eyes once more and forces a word from her lips. "Sorry."

"Sorry? Sorry." Lucas repeats, a hallow laugh catching in his throat. Its almost funny if it wasn't so sad, so wrong and he thinks this must be some bad dream where he can't wake up. He sighs, placing a hand on either side of her crossed arms, making her see him. "You have nothing to be sorry for. What could Peyton Sawyer have to apologize about? She is amazing."

She shakes her head in a silent protest and he moves his one hand up, catching a golden ringlet in his palm, smoothing his fingers down to the tip. She knows that he doesn't want to know this, to know that she sits awake a night wishing that she were dead, praying for the fear to stop. So she plays along. "For all sorts of things."

A smile crosses his face, brief and true. "Come here." He gestures, opening his arms, inviting her in, offering comfort and understanding. For a moment she turns from him, eyes searching the ceiling for fallen angels before she launches herself into his open embrace. And she is in his arms, sobs mingled with hiccups against his chest, tears dampening his shirts as he whispers softly into her golden mane, "It's okay. It's okay. I've got you." He kisses the top of her head fiercely. "I won't let anything happen to you." Because it can't, it just can't; because life isn't worth living without her drawings, her green eyes, the way she glares at him when he has pushed too hard, or the way a song can make her smile one moment and sob the next. And because since she can blaring into his world, nearly running him down he cannot imagine life without her by his side.

He isn't sure how long they stand like that, it feels like forever, but when she pulls away to wipe her eyes on the sleeve of her hoodie, it feels all too short. "Now I am really embarrassed." She admits, dabbing at her eyes. "I basically break in here and then I wake you up in the middle of the night and cry all over you."

He tugs gently at the sleeve of her hoodie, pulling them closer, hating how empty his arms feel without her in them. "You did not break in. You are always welcome here, you know that."

"Well as long as Brooke isn't here." She immediately regrets the words, regrets bringing up another messy piece of their history.

"Always." Lucas insists and she leaves it at that a warmth filling her.

"So…" They stand as she fidgets, her fingers drumming along her pants, the soft sound amplified in the silence.

"Any chance of you getting back to sleep?" He looks at her sideway, mockingly fearful of her answer.

Peyton can't help but allow a small smile to cross her lips at his expression "That would be a no." She rubs her arms as she tries to block out images from that terrible night, the feel of his hand on her neck and the smell of his breath against her skin. "Sorry." She sighs as she crawls back on his bed.

"Well you know they say sleep is highly overrated."

"Luke, I should really just go home. This isn't fair to you. You shouldn't be forced to stay awake because I am too scared to close my eyes."

"No." Lucas stretches a hand out placing it on her arm, keeping her from leaving.

"Its okay, Luke, really." She lies, she cannot do this to him, she cannot be another problem he has to fix.

He shakes his head, and inwardly battles with himself about how much to tell her. "No, its not okay. I need you here." An incredulous look is all she gives him. "What? You don't believe me?"

She looks from his hand on her arm back to his face; doesn't he know that her belief in everything is broken? Doesn't he know that she isn't sure if the sky is blue or red, if she is coming or going, or standing still? "What you need is sleep." And with that she pulls her back her arm, breaking contact with her only anchor in a sea of turmoil.

"Yes." He agrees quickly, so quickly that Peyton cannot hide the flicker of hurt and surprise that crosses her face. "No, its not like that. It's just- I haven't been sleeping since…" He cannot bear to name it. "Tonight, with you, that is the first time I have been able to sleep, because you were with me and I knew you were safe."

She softens at his admission. "I can't close my eyes without seeing him." She admits.

"Then don't." Luke moves to lie against the pillow, grabbing for the T.V remote and flipping it on. "Just be with me."

She wants to tell him no, to tell him that he deserves more than a splintered girl with no hope but instead she finds herself leaning back into his arm, and resting her head on his chest. "No infomercials." She bargains.

"No infomercials." He agrees.

It's a little after five according to the blue LCD clock beside his bed when Lucas complains once again at the TV Land programming. "See how exactly do they just change Darrins like that and no one says anything?"

Lucas waits for Peyton's reply- for the past few hours they had been trading quips on everything from the decoration of Jeanie's bottle (over the top) to Arnold Ziffle (coolest T.V pig, ever) and they were into their second episode of Bewitched, but no retort came. "Hey." Lucas looked down to see Peyton's head rising and falling against his chest with every breath he took, and smiled to himself at the slumbering blonde angel in his arms.

Outside his door window he can see the twilight rolling in, the first weak strands of light trying to brighten the world, clicking off the T.V he places a kiss on the top of her head before leaning against his headboard. "And they lived happily ever after." He whispered, closing his eyes, both of them awash in a brief moment of contentment.

TBC

A/N: A big thanks to everyone for reading and thank you for the reviews. Hopefully you enjoyed this next part, if you did please click the happy green review button and feed my muse. Thanks! Becca