Chapter Two
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Like most Vulcans, Sarek values precision in all things—thinking, speaking, keeping a schedule. Also like most Vulcans, he is a realist who knows that circumstances are often beyond his control. He is rarely flustered—and never visibly so—by unexpected delays, by malfunctioning equipment, by a sudden change of plans.
"Just once I'd like to hear you yell at some pokey transit driver," Amanda said one time, only half teasing. Yet they both knew that his equanimity was part sham when the stakes were high enough. When he was ambassador to Earth he occasionally stepped away from a fraught discussion to avoid revealing his anger at a recalcitrant or unreasonable negotiator.
"I would have told him to his face he is an idiot!" Amanda said when he recounted his day as they lay in bed together at night.
"I know you would," he said, reaching for her hand. "I wish I had your courage."
He knew she thought he was being facetious but he meant what he said. Amanda Grayson was the bravest person he knew.
How many other humans had married Vulcans, had moved off-planet and raised a family on an unfamiliar—and frankly inhospitable—world?
She was fierce in other ways, too—a tireless advocate for children, a gifted educator, an outspoken critic of injustice when she saw it.
Sarek sits ramrod straight on the second row seat in the tender ferrying passengers from the large—and late—public transport from New Vulcan to Starbase Yorktown—and stifles his impatience the way Amanda would not have. An ion storm had kept them from traveling at maximum speed after leaving the colony, and now Sarek watches out the window of the tender as it sidles up to the airlock on the starbase and uniformed crew scramble to connect the cables.
Spock will be annoyed at the delay. The last time they spoke when they arranged this meeting, his son had not bothered to hide his irritation with his father. Since Amanda's death they have reached something of a rapprochement, or at least Sarek thought they had. Perhaps Spock's irritation is the result of the stress of the Enterprise's deep space mission. He'll know more when he sees him in person. Dinner should be instructive.
The restaurant is two levels up from the airlock and Sarek elects to take the stairs rather than wait for the lift. His healer would not approve, not until the heart flutter he's developed is better controlled. He starts up the wide steps and pauses on the landing to catch his breath.
There ahead of him at the entrance to the restaurant are Spock and the lieutenant. They are facing each other and do not see him, and for a moment he observes their body language.
Lieutenant Uhura is in uniform, her arms crossed, her chin dipped down. Spock wears a loose Vulcan tunic under a fitted jacket, the kind of civilian clothes Sarek has seen him wear when he's home on leave. He's speaking too softly for Sarek to make out the words but he's gesturing with one hand, his other hand in his jacket pocket.
Neither Spock nor the lieutenant is smiling. Both stand angled away from each other.
A quarrel? Or perhaps Spock is difficult not just with his father.
Taking another deep breath, Sarek climbs the rest of the stairs.
"Father," Spock says, moving toward him. The lieutenant smiles and uncrosses her arms.
"My apologies for being late," Sarek says, but before he can say more, the lieutenant touches his forearm lightly and says, "It's quite alright. We just arrived, too."
Perhaps that was the reason for the discord he witnessed. He follows them into the restaurant and they settle at a table near a large window overlooking the domed interior of the starbase. Situated on the edge of Federation space, the starbase is more transportation hub than anything else. Sarek argued long and hard—and ultimately futilely—when it was built that it should house a unified military base staffed by Andorians, Vulcans, and humans. To his disappointment, the Vulcan leadership vetoed the idea. So far Sarek's worry seems unfounded. Looking around at the busy foot traffic of people from multiple worlds, he hopes he continues to be proven wrong about the dangers of the frontier.
A server comes and goes with bottles of water and bowls of vegetables. From long habit with humans, Sarek intersperses eating with conversation. He asks the lieutenant about her family and listens closely to the homesick tone in her voice. Spock, too, seems subdued.
At last the meal is cleared away and Sarek debates how to broach the real reason for his visit.
Twice before he's suggested that Spock leave Starfleet and come to New Vulcan to help in the reconstruction efforts. Each time Spock dismissed him without discussion. This time Sarek comes with a message from the High Council—and an offer of a position for his son. It's unprecedented that a young person is offered such an influential position, but then, these are unprecedented times.
Before he can put his thoughts to words, Spock pulls a small box from his pocket and places it between them on the table.
"Selek sent this to me," he says, his voice wavering. "He wanted me to have it upon his death."
Sarek has to call upon a deep measure of control not to reveal his distress.
Over the past two years he has spent more time with Selek than he has with his own son—or he has spent more time with the older, wiser, calmer version of his son. Even now he isn't quite sure how to characterize his relationship with the older man. As father to son? Or as two strangers who just happen to have Spock in common? They spoke of it once and then chose to ignore it, Selek busy with organizing the High Council and allocating resources, Sarek continuing his work as liaison between Earth and New Vulcan.
That Spock already knows about Selek's death is a relief. Part of Sarek's uneasiness on the transport was trying to decide how to break the news. His own sense of loss is mitigated by Spock himself—his living, breathing son still available to him. For Spock, however, Selek's death must represent something else, and that gives Sarek pause.
Spock presses the top of the box and it springs open.
"Have you ever seen this?" he asks, pulling out a necklace.
Sarek shivers involuntarily. "How did you get that?"
"I told you. Selek sent it to me. He said it belonged—"
"To Amanda," Sarek says, taking the necklace from Spock. "I gave it to her years ago, before we were married."
"I have never seen it before," Spock counters, an unmistakable note of challenge in his voice. Sarek glances at him briefly and then examines the pendant in his palm.
"Tell me about it," the lieutenant says. "It's lovely."
How to put into words such a story? He starts slowly, describing the young woman he met at the Vulcan embassy, a human cultural aide accepted by no one at first, and certainly not by him.
"I saw no reason to bend to human sensibilities," Sarek says, enjoying the memory of Amanda in those days, eager to help the Vulcans navigate the intricacies of human interactions—chit chat and party etiquette, simple social niceties that at the time had seemed to him like a capitulation of sorts.
"I admit I was not easy to get to know," Sarek says, and for the first time all evening, the lieutenant laughs. Spock, too, looks amused. "Fortunately for me, Spock's mother was persistent. We began sharing conversations and meals together, and soon I realized that we were becoming friends."
He sees the lieutenant and his son exchange glances. A similar story, perhaps, in their past? Spock has never shared much about his relationship with Lieutenant Uhura, though he has not hidden it, either. If Amanda were here, she would have winkled out all the details by now.
"For a time we were parted when I was deployed to an off-world post," Sarek continues. "By then I knew that she and I were…more…than friends. Being without her was—"
He hesitates, searching for the word. Being parted from Amanda—before they were married, even before he had spoken a single word of love to her—was just as it is now.
"It was unbearable," he says. "Unbearable."
For a moment they are silent around the table, and then he says, "I found this stone at a gemcutters in ShiKahr. It is not rare—at least not on Vulcan—but it is the color of your mother's world, and for that reason I had it fitted with a setting and a chain. Of all the gifts I ever gave her, she cherished this one most."
"Because it was the first," the lieutenant says.
"Perhaps," Sarek agrees. "She liked its impracticality, the fact that there was no celebration or occasion for it. Freely given—that's what she said. Proof that even her toughest Vulcan student could learn a thing or two from humans."
Sarek returns the necklace to the box and looks up at Spock.
"You did not see it," Sarek says, "because she wore it hidden. At first it was to avoid drawing attention to our relationship before we were married, and later because she wished to feel its touch. She was wearing it when—"
He stops, unable to say more.
The lieutenant reaches across the table and lets her hand rest on his arm.
"Thank you," she says simply, and Sarek nods.
They leave the restaurant and say their goodbyes outside the door. He's said nothing about the offer from the High Council or his own wishes that Spock consider making a life on the colony. The Enterprise crew will be on leave on Yorktown for a few weeks while the ship is resupplied. If his own transport to Earth weren't leaving tomorrow, he'd try to find time to speak to Spock alone.
He stops his descent down the stairs and looks back in time to see his son and the lieutenant standing at the top of the stairs, facing each other, Spock opening the box and unclasping the necklace. As Sarek watches, Spock leans forward and places the necklace around the lieutenant's neck. The young woman's eyes are shining and she tiptoes up to give his son a lingering kiss. The necklace shines brightly against her red uniform.
Not Amanda's necklace, and yet in the infinite mystery of the universe, it is.
Sarek turns and heads down the stairs. Later there will be time for the hard conversations. Tonight he leaves them to the comfort of each other.
Notes: One more chapter. Thanks for letting me know that you are reading and enjoying!
I've written about Amanda and Sarek's romance in other fics. Take a look at my profile for a complete listing.