UGLY
Chapter Two
Time, which for Dudley had always been defined in easy, neat blocks of school and summers, was suddenly a blurred evermore, stretching out endlessly at either side of the present.
He didn't know how long he spent there but it had felt like a lifetime. His parents kept to themselves; cooped up in their bedroom at the top of the house away from the freakishness. The redheaded family hissed about ingratitude and he could hear his mother's sobs through the cardboard thin walls during the night.
His own presence seemed to have been easier to accept or at least ignore and he wondered the dark halls lonely and uncomfortable, his only respite; his brief and violent encounters with an ever smirking Draco and sometimes Harry. Harry's pity was a hard pill to swallow; the boy gave weak, watery smiles and even tried to start a conversation once or twice. Dudley had been vehement in his refusal to talk to his cousin and punched him hard enough to break ribs, Harry's eyes shone in pain and there wasn't a single glimmer of hatred in them anymore. Dudley was bewildered and bewitched in equal measure.
He didn't know what his cousin was doing but he was always whispering and plotting with the older, grizzled men that flowed through the house; they looked at him like a prophet come to save them all. Actually everyone in that stupid house held the pretty, tiny boy up on some sort of pedestal, they just seemed to assume he would take care of things and Dudley thought they were all mad, Harry looked tired and fragile and their expectant eyes made his jaw tighten under the pressure. Whatever the hell it was that they wanted, Harry was always busy because of it and only released during the evenings and even then he was surrounded by friends and fatherly figures.
Dudley had to content with watching him from a distance or fighting with Draco hard enough until Harry had to physically tear them apart. The pale haired boy found this endlessly amusing, but he threw himself as eagerly as ever into their fights and threw slanted blade sharp smiles that were anything but friendly over Harry's head as he jammed himself in between their fists.
Maybe not unsurprisingly, Dudley found himself lumped into the same category as Draco; boys who were mean to Harry and therefore must be disliked. He'd overheard the bushy haired girl and the lanky redhead talking about them, sentences filled with 'Draco and Dudley' and 'they'. Draco who had been leaning against the wall outside where they were talking had sent him one of those razor edged smiles and mouthed an insult he hadn't understood, Dudley punched him hard enough to break his nose anyway, and later he came upon Harry asking one of the older members of the house if they couldn't split them up. All but pleading because he was worried they would end up hurting each other or themselves in their bitterness. Dudley had told Draco about that and they'd laughed hard enough to cry, lying on their beds, the musty grey carpet between them, it was almost amicable.
The evenings at that tall, narrow corridor-ed house fell into an easy pattern. The kitchen was the only room that was truly touched by light and that's where they all congregated. Everywhere was else damp, dark and dusty; still persevered in the past and unable to change, to adapt to the new inhabitants.
Dudley had his own chair in the left hand corner of the room, away from the main wooden table and the always busy sprawl of kitchen surfaces. The chair was half in shadow, barely in the room at all and perfectly positioned so he could watch everyone but wasn't included. They didn't want him and even if he refused to acknowledge it, the fact was too painful to push himself into the spot light when everyone hated him so blatantly, so he kept to the corner. He watched and seethed and longed and Harry was always the focus of all his feelings and emotions, he was the calm in the redheaded storm that swirled around him and Dudley couldn't help but watch him.
His cousin laughed and beamed and was happy all the time in that kitchen. It was something foreign, he'd spent his life watching Harry beaten into submission and grimly plodding his way onwards. He had never seen him actually happy. It made him burn with joy and everyone was like moths to his flame. He could see why they hated him and Draco so much when he saw Harry smile. Draco who seemed sometimes so much like Dudley, was so obviously not at these times; the pale boy was right there in the centre of things, he was a melodramatic, little attention seeker; exuberant and witty when he wanted to be and always hissing sharp stinging comments at Harry, with a double edged familiarity that hadn't been there when he first arrived.
The red-haired family scowled at him in obvious dislike but Harry would just give him a bland, untouched look and send a tart reply back and because Harry was ok with Draco, the rest of them were; even if their reactions were hesitant and forced. He guessed they didn't understand Harry and Draco's relationship anymore than he did, but they were willing to accept the boy for the dark haired youth and in the end that was what mattered. Dudley wasn't clever enough to understand Draco and his cousin's interactions; conversations that verged on insults, which were said with the crudeness of anger and the smoothness of new friendship, were things that were beyond him and he didn't like that. It was a harsh friendship, a dangerous one and it highlighted an aspect of his cousin he could never have, never indulge in, in that respect Harry was out of his league.
Draco knew it too and he would stare at Dudley, all corners and edges and superiority. Dudley really, really hated him.
Nights were long, days of emptiness were longer and those evenings; full of light and laughter and jealousy flew by in a wash of colour and bittersweet longing. At least he had his continuity, for a while anyway.
The day the wolf man went away seemed to signal another change in the dynamics of the household and Harry who had previously been the bonfire around which everyone gathered, crept away in misery and worry and tried to find solitude. He found it on the stairs, high enough in the house that no one would stumble across him apart from the Dursleys. Dudley's father aimed a kick at him that he didn't avoid and Dudley was content to reside in his room, watching Harry's small frame through the crack of his door way.
"Sulking, Potter?"
"Not now, Malfoy"
Dudley could almost see Draco's knife filled smirk; Harry face turned up in the narrow line through the door presumptively to look at him and Dudley's fists clenched into his sheets.
Draco gave a snort and proceeded to ignore his cousin. "I see you have decided to abandon the rest of the ginger haired plebeians. Good choice, if only you had done it sooner I might not consider you, brain damaged."
Harry was silent and his back was slowly rising, catching the light and making his neck glitter gold.
"Draco, please, just shut up for a while"
Draco's white face appeared in Dudley's vision and he stared, face unreadable, downward at Harry's crown for one long minute. He was repulsive in Dudley's eyes, pointy and sharp and bleached like a bone; ugly and pretty all at the same time. The boy raised his shoulder in a half hearted shrug and slid downwards next to Harry; a gap the size of Dudley in between them. The pale boy's metallic eyes were liquid mercury in the flickering hall lights.
"He'll be fine, I'm just worried"
Draco didn't say anything in return to Harry, but his cousin glanced up at him and Draco's sharp features must have been set in a way that made his silence ok.
"I had a dream about him dying and them bringing his body back. He didn't even look dead. Just pale, really pale like he was ill or cold. But he was gone and there was just a small burn mark above his heart, like a cigarette burn but that was it. He was dead and he looked like he was sleeping. I don't want any more people to die."
Draco was quiet, looking uncomfortably at his hands, "it's just a dream; Remus is tough. He won't die."
Harry's desperation to believe made Dudley sick and he found himself truly curious about Harry's world for the first time, if only so he could understand his cousin more, to make this scene between the two wizards less intimate in his eyes.
"He'll be fine" Draco repeated and rubbed the back of his hand with his thumb. "You better go; they'll think I've murdered you if you stay too long"
Even Dudley knew that wasn't what Draco wanted.
Harry nodded and hesitated, "Draco" the pale youth glanced up, eyes still soft and liquid, "Thanks and I just wanted to say I understand and I forgive you, you did what you could in a bad situation and it's not my place or anyone else to moralise that, even if I may be inclined to do so."
Draco gave a harsh brisk nod and Harry padded softly away downstairs back into the hordes of redheads. The pale boy was frowning and staring angrily at his palms, rubbing them against each other and Dudley didn't understand anything, he shifted and the transfigured bed groaned.
Draco was framed in the doorway when he glanced up, icy in his anger, "Enjoy the show did you mudman? I should turn you into a rat, a big fat creeping rat"
Dudley hissed angrily at him, half afraid of the threat.
"You make me sick, watching him, following him around." Draco continued, eyes glimmering with repulsion. "He won't ever look at you like that. How could he; you're nothing next to him"
Dudley's anger was red and hot in his eyes and he was on Draco with a swiftness he didn't know he possessed. "he's mine" he snarled, "He's mine. He's mine"
Draco was beneath him, breaking and bleeding but with a deft twist he rolled them over, a knee slamming hard enough to paralyse, into his stomach. Dudley gasped, suddenly limp and Draco's sharp bone fingers dug into his neck, and those silver eyes were burnt brilliantly silver in his blurred vision.
"He's not yours, mudblood" his voice was deceptively calm; disgust and rage dripping from the confines of a control he hadn't known the boy possessed. "Harry isn't yours, he was never yours, he'll never be yours, get it into your fat stupid head. He barely tolerates you and only some deranged moral stupidity keeps you here in his company. He's better than you and you will never have any of him. Leave him alone"
Dudley was still beneath the boy, red faced with extrusion. He was fat and ugly and stupid and the image of those steel hard eyes would forever be imprinted into his mind, even years later when everything had faded to distant, unfocused memories. Draco's face was bone white and his fingers were gripping so harshly into his skin he could barely breath. "You..." he started "Harry, you..."
Draco gave a pained noise and punched him, hard enough for his nose to crack beneath his fist and blood to spray almost humorously at them. The boy's face was ivory and crimson and he was yet again a pretty person, looking down at Dudley, being better and having more.
The boy snapped a response but Dudley didn't hear, too focused on the blanket of agony that was covering his face, he didn't even really notice when Draco got off him, stumbling away looking ill and drawn and fled from the room, Dudley was left on the grey carpet, dripping blood beneath his fingers.
Draco didn't return to their shared room that night and he was glad for that.
The fight forced an uncomfortable and awkward change in their previously simple relationship and the almost amicable fights and shared mockery of Harry abruptly ended. Instead they avoided each other, skirting around the other as if they could burn, Dudley found himself alone at night a few times a week now, he had no idea where the pale boy went and didn't really care that much, he was angry, really angry and he didn't fully understand why. Draco seemed to, though and refused to look at him, his familiar blade sharp grin unused and instead the boy would scowl at a point just past Dudley's head, looking bewildered and hateful.
Dudley tried not to care too much that the only, almost friendship he had, had dissolved so easily.
Time had a funny feel in that house, weeks felt like minutes but months felt like years. Christmas decorations sprang up in the kitchen and the already crowded room was awash with bobbing paper lights and primary colours that would leave the period child-like and claustrophobic in his memory. Even Dudley wasn't stupid enough to ask his parents about presents that year, his mother was looking old and his father weary and they were both only surviving on hate. He was pretty sure if they could they would have killed Harry, sometimes he thought he might have helped.
The pretty redheaded girl was almost desperate with longing for his cousin by December. She would corner him in the shadows of the room and sit impossibly close at his side; left alone politely by everyone else except for Dudley jealous eyes. They were surrounded by the soft white fairy lights that lined the melted edges of the kitchen, her long bright hair would slide over his glitter gold skin and he would reach up with a painful tenderness to hook the loose strands behind her ear, his hands long and gracefully and slightly blurred in jealousy tinted vision. They were unquestionably beautiful together, his dark head resting atop of her brilliantly red one, pale smooth faces that were inches away from each other as they rested wearily and those pairs of big pretty eyes that didn't spare a glance for him or anyone else in those few moments.
Dudley hated her, hated her prettiness, hated how she fitted like a jigsaw up against his cousin and how he would wrap his slender arm around her shoulders and give her that little smile that was sincere and adoring. He hated how right they looked together, of course his cousin was going to get the prettiest girl, he was the prettiest person Dudley had ever seen and Dudley had learnt long ago that pretty people ended up with more, but it didn't stop Dudley from hating them, hating and wanting till it was a mixture of strange gut churning emotions. Sometimes he would glance at just the right moment and Draco would be watching them too, his face carefully blank and eyes like shinny mirrors.
Then they would look at each other; he couldn't say what passed between them in those moments and it didn't really matter because they were both just waiting to look back at Harry anyway.
Every single one of the freaks was looking bedraggled round the edges, tired and weary enough that it left smudges around their eyes and their hair a little limp at the ends, Dudley didn't care to know what was going on, but he came upon the older red heads crying a couple of times, they looked almost ugly in those moments. Except Harry, the purple bruises left his eyes neon green and his hair had grown long enough to curl almost caressingly around the drooping folds of his collar; the dim lighting made him painfully attractive and apparently the girl Weasley thought so too. Dudley hated her maybe more than Draco sometimes.
Christmas day was a small cocoon of make-believe for everyone, bottles of alcohol and plates of food were spread across every surface, music blasted in each room and the redheaded twins led a chorus of 'Fairytale of New York', waltzing with each other around their laughing parents and pretending to argue over who had the best credentials to lead and who was condemned to take the role of the female.
Dudley face was aching with laughter and his fat stomach wobbled as he choked on dry turkey, he wished his parents were there sometimes during that night, but he didn't think they'd approve anyway so didn't linger any lasting thoughts on them. That probably said a lot about him and none of it positive, but Dudley was good at denial.
"Come on Gin" One of the twins grabbed at his sister and twirled her round, dipping her near the floor while she scoffed, red faced into her ribbons of her hair. Harry was grinning by the table; his face lit up and reflected on a dozen different crystal tumblers and Draco wasn't looking as he leapt up to join in, holding out his hand for Hermione. She ended up trying to lead and they stumbled over each other till Draco stopped abruptly, pink dusting his cheeks, making him seem less sharp edged than ever
"That's it," He declared, and gave Hermione a shove into Ron's lanky frame, "take her Weaselbee, I need a woman with some experience" and he proceeded to give a dramatic bow to Mrs Weasley and led her whirling, round the kitchen table. He was taller than her but narrow and painfully young in her embrace and the older woman was smiling, seeming almost tearful as she held him close, protectively. Dudley wondered where Draco's parents were.
"Harry!" Ginny had escaped the clutches of her brother and was stood, beaming and sparkling pretty before his cousin. Her hand latched on to his wrist and Dudley could see the delicate spider-web of blue veins that traced the inside of his arm, her thumb stroked them loving. His heart clenched and his hands itched to slap her away, Harry was meant to be his.
Harry gave her a sheepish, lob-sided grin as she directed him, placing his hand on her waist and clutching at his other. He was gentle with her, spinning her around slowly and drawing her close to him as if she would break like glass if he moved too quickly. It was irritating, especially when he couldn't have been two inches taller than her and his face was as soft and delicate as his partners. Ginny seemed to love it though and Dudley wondered if his cousin could see the love that was all but burning out of her eyes. Dudley had never treated a girl like that, had never treated anyone like that, he would have been laughed at if he had, but there again none of them had ever been pretty like Harry or Ginny, they hadn't been made for that kind of gentleness.
The Weasley twins had snagged the pink haired lady and proceeded in a screaming, laughing crab walk with the tall woman stumbling between them, her hair flashing festive red and green. Hermione was leading Ron through the steps sternly and he had a face of utmost concentration as he looked down at his feet, missing the brief second of softness that flashed across his partners face. Dudley didn't hate them for that, but the longing was enough to make him sick.
"Oh, Sorry!" the three person waltz had knocked into the pretty red headed girl and she tumbled forward, sending Harry and herself to the floor. He was sprawled out languidly and she sat grinning between his knees, her hands clutching at his thighs and their forehead touching as they laughed together. Harry's eyelashes were inky feathers resting against his cheeks and Ginny's eyes were wide with trepidation.
Dudley wasn't even surprised when she leant forward that extract inch and kissed him.
They were as pretty together as he had imagined.
Harry had moved her head slightly and her lips grazed the line of his jaw, his brow was low and troubled and he turned to stare at her, mouthing something that made her shake her head apologetically. Those pretty people stared at each other, silhouetted for a long silent moment, unaware of the loud, energetic dance that had erupted around them.
The twinkling fairy lights were making the fly away strands of their hair silver and behind them, Draco was white faced and iced.
Dudley didn't say anything as he saw the boy leave the room, his mouth was too dry and he was choking on his own selfish emotions.
Draco was in their room that night, laid out across the floor, with his white hair and white skin, looking ill against the backdrop of their grey carpet. The was a bottle of Whiskey beside him and they sat and drank together, taking shots from the bottle cap until the room rocked on its axis and they managed to knock the bottle over, watching as it left a crawling bronze stain across most of the floor.
"Fuck" Dudley said.
Draco titled his head to look at him, he was supported awkwardly by the bed behind him and his eyes were disks of unfocused grey.
"Fuck" he repeated back and they started to laugh, their laughter laced with an embarrassing, shared desperation and so they laughed louder, as if they could hide their emotions in volume.
"Where's your parents, Mudblood"
Dudley didn't have the energy to care about the insult. "Upstairs, crying most likely. They really, really hate all you freaks, hate Harry" Everything always came back to Harry. He wiggled his fat fingers in Draco's face "Freaky"
Draco snorted and gave him a critical once over, "You lot are the freaks" he retorted and Dudley wasn't exactly sure who 'you lot' were anymore so he didn't hit him for the insult.
The boy scowled, hands dropping limp at his sides and glanced at Draco's bone white face and the tight lines around his eyes and mouth "Where's your parents then?"
"Prison" Draco's expression was blade sharp but his eyes were slightly glazy, betraying him; Dudley hated him too much to spare any pity. "Father's in prison and I think my mother's with the Dark Lord."
"You don't know?"
Draco started to laugh again, hard and acidic enough that his eyes were wet when he finally managed to gasp out a response. "No I don't know. They're probably dead. Probably being tortured.
He laughed again, but Dudley couldn't bring himself to laugh with him this time.
"They weren't good people, but I..." Draco voice was terribly quiet and his slur was barely noticeable "I wish..."
Dudley's fingers fiddled with the small bottle cap, rubbing against the plastic seal that still clung to the edges and stank of sickly Whiskey. His eyes were unfocused and the plastic blurred and slipped between his sweaty palms, rolling sluggishly across the damp, grey carpet. Draco was silent beside him, his breath evening out and his eyelashes pale and translucent as they fluttered against the curve of his cheek.
There were small slivery tracks down one of his face and Dudley pretended not to have noticed as he drifted into unconsciousness.
-
When he awoke the next morning Draco was gone and the house was cold and quiet, whispered murmurs echoed like ghosts below him. Ron and Hermione were curled up together on the couch in the living room, still dressed in bright red and green and looking worried and confused, Hermione was biting her lip and sighed in exasperation as he peered inside the room, her nails were torn and bitten to the cuticles, crude in their imperfection. Ron glowered at him, ears red.
"Just fuck off Dursley" Ron snapped and stood up to force him out the room, Ron was massive in a lanky, unfinished kind of way and Dudley was in no mood to fight. He shrugged and turned around, feeling only the familiar mixture of loneliness and resentment.
"Maybe he'd just confused, what with Voldermort and everything" Hermione's voice was swallowed by space as he turned the corner and went towards the kitchen, he could hear Draco's mocking laugh a mile off and followed it because he wasn't sure what else he should do.
"Merlin, you're pathetic" the boy scoffed as Dudley entered. He was stood with a strange lazy tension, facing off with a fuming Ginny. Her pretty eyes flashed over at him and her cheeks were bright with humiliation.
"Shut up Malfoy, what do you know about anything?"
Draco sent her a vicious smirk "You're the one who's been rejected by Scarhead, on Christmas day as well, so apparently, more than you do"
Dudley stared in confusion and some sort of desperate longing, but Harry would never reject Ginny. She was so pretty, they both were, how could they not be together?
Ginny looked like she was about to cry, "Shut up!" she screamed, "Just Shut up, your own parents abandoned you; what could you know of love"
Draco looked murderous, his fists twitched at his sides and blade filled grin had disappeared into a thin hard line of pale lips.
Dudley wondered if she knew Draco's parents were probably dead, he wondered if she even cared. He didn't think he or Draco would have done, but somehow that made it all the more worse. Harry would have never said anything like that either way.
"He'll never love you, he's had the chance for years and he's never managed it yet." Draco was calm when he was really angry "You look ridiculous, panting after him like a bitch in heat and he doesn't even notice does he? You're a joke, everyone can see it apart from you. It's embarrassing."
Ginny was as red as her hair and her pretty face was twisted and smeared by ugly tears. There was movement behind them, but Dudley was too caught up in the angry movement of the girl's arm, her clawed hand that stretched out and struck Draco hard across his pale face, Dudley winced a little for him.
"Ginny!"
Draco was a marble statue before her rage, mocking mirror eyed and unmoving, a red mark smeared across the sharp edges of his cheek bone.
"It's not true, Harry, tell me it isn't true"
Harry and his friends were in the kitchen and the crying girl was screaming at his cousin, her hands grabbing and pulling at his shirt. "Harry, please"
Harry faulted, he was tiny and skinny and his skin paper thin beneath her sharp angry nails as she threw herself around his neck. His dark hair curled around the slenderness of her fingers like silk ropes. "Ginny, I..."
Dudley grinned viciously behind him, catching the girl's heart-broken face, she screeched and threw herself away, twisting to face the blond boy, her wand appearing in her hand and pointed at Draco's pale blank face.
"Gin!"
"Ginny!" Harry had leapt into action, snagging her wrist and with a deft twist her fingers were forced to slackness and the wand fell with a hollow bounce to the floor. She fought against him, filled with so many emotions that Dudley didn't even know which one she was crying for.
"I hate you, why are you protecting him!" She hit Harry then, and his skin, glitter gold split beneath her nails, leaving a trail of sluggish blood tracing the slope of his mouth and chin. She sent a loathing glare at Draco through her tears and his face was smug and mocking and he mouthed something at her than made her scream like a wounded animal.
Harry struggled as she surged forward, he wasn't that much bigger than the girl and she was brutal and unpredictable in her attack. Ron was frowning and moved forward hesitatingly, pulling his sobbing sister to him, she clawed at him before running out the room. His red and green jumper was streaked with tears.
"Harry"
"I'm sorry!" his cousin cried suddenly, the blood still wet across his lips and his eyes wide and wild and the air around him was crackling strangely. "I didn't know..."
"Didn't know? How could you not know how much she loved you?"
Dudley didn't think that was what Harry was talking about, but the dark haired boy remained silent and hung his head looking as small and breakable next to his angry, massive redheaded friend as he ever had in their childhood. Ron fists were clenching and unrolling and he spluttered, shaking Hermione away from him angrily, he could have snapped Harry in two if he tried and Dudley didn't think his cousin would have tried to stop him in that moment. Draco was frowning, his faced marred with something that would have been worry except for the overwhelming, fierce, selfish longing that corrupted it. He took a step forward, scowling as he reached out to the dark haired youth.
"And you!" Ron spun around to the pale boy, shoving Harry aside with a controlled roughness that said more than any apology would do later on. "How dare you, who do you, think you are. Death Eater!"
"Ronald!"
"Ron!"
No one expect Draco to punch the redheaded boy, but he did, reaching up and out and landing a solid blow that made the taller youth stumble and bend over in pain, clutching his nose and hissing curses between gritted teeth.
The kitchen was a mess of screaming and shouting, Ron had his wand out and was pointing it at Draco, his hand shaking with barely controlled rage and vicious sparks were flaring out the tip of the thin wood, landing and searing small black dots into the stone floor. Hermione was pulling at him, wrapping her arms around his broad chest, her hands looked very small and feminine against his violently red jumper.
"Just try it, blood traitor" Draco spat, his voice blade sharp, penetrating the bubble of panic that had engulfed them.
Dudley didn't have a clue what a blood traitor was but Ron had another surge of vengeful energy and was struggling against the smaller bodies trying to hold him back. Harry was once again between two warring factions, but Ron wasn't the same as Dudley or Draco and shoved him away with little interest, too focused on the pale youth before him.
Harry stumbled backwards and Draco's hand clasped around his thin upper arms, dragging him to stability, those pale fingers tight with greedy possession as he pulled the dark haired youth further away from Ron. Those steel grey eyes were for one single moment slanted towards Dudley and Dudley hated him the same as ever. Harry was staring wounded at his best friend and Draco sent a vicious grin over his head, Ron only saw Malfoy and managed to pull his arm from Hermione, waving his wand with angry jerky movement.
"No you're going to hit Harry!"
Hermione's voice was shrill in panic and Dudley snapped to his feet, watching sick, as the red light arched towards the two boys. Draco and Harry were a picture of perfect contrasts in that moment, Draco gripping Harry still and Harry staring wide eyed and breakable and so very, very pretty.
The light never did hit them.
Harry frowned, eyes narrowed into illuminating green slits and his forehead beaded with perspiration; the red shape crashed and rebounded off what seemed like a translucent dome that shimmered before them. The violent, scarlet shape cracked, splitting into a thousand angry streaks that bolted away from them and back at Ron and left a small harsh cut across his suddenly pale face.
"Harry... You... I" Ron and Harry were looking at each with a terribly uncertainty and Dudley realised with a start that this was a poignant moment in their relationship. Harry had never retaliated against the redhead's temper before, and now Ron had been bettered so very easily in those few scrambling seconds. Harry was bird boned and paper skinned next to his friend and he had to crane his neck back to look up into Ron's face but Dudley didn't think for a second Ron would ever win a real fight between them.
Ron swallowed, all the fight drained out of him and he was a whirlwind of betrayal and embarrassment and guilt staring into Harry apologetic, weary face. His cousin may had said something to ease his friend battered pride but Draco got there first and Draco was nothing if not scathingly.
"Well, go on then. Run off like the she-weasel, go nurse your bloated ego and wallow in self pity for a while. It seems to be the only thing you Weasleys are good at."
Ron stared at Harry for one long second, Harry was pale and wavering in Draco's hands and his lips were still caked with blood from Ginny's nails. "Ron..." he began and made to move, Draco's grip was firm and Ron left the room red and silent.
Hermione was still staring with quiet thoughtfulness at Harry and Draco, her expression fierce and intelligence gleaming from her drawn features. Draco's pale fingers were still coiled vice like into Harry's overly large jumper, his knuckles bleached and her eyes darted from his hands and up to his pale, pointed face. Draco's eyes were molten mecury, feverish in their obsession and his mouth was a quivering line that was tight with lingering fear and something else Dudley couldn't name.
"Oh..." her eyes flew to Harry's big exhausted green ones and then back to Draco's, her arm made a sudden sharp movement and she captured Harry's small thin hand, their knuckles bumped awkwardly together and she squeezed his fingers before letting them drop just as quickly.
"Go" Harry said softly, his eyes brilliantly green with understanding and Dudley wondered how he could see that and not the desperation that was brutally obvious in ever line of Draco's tense body behind him. Hermione's love was a shinning purity in her pretty face and Harry's innocence was still jewelled in his eyes and maybe that explained everything. The quivering in Harry's limbs was painfully obvious now and the thin layer of dried blood cracked across his lips as he gave a crooked grin at his friend.
Hermione gave a heart wrenched smile in return and left quickly. Dudley only just caught the look of immeasurable hate she sent to Draco.
Draco sent her a smirk back that was all smashed up glass and razor blades and his hands still locked around Harry's too thin arms possessively.
Harry didn't notice and Dudley wished he had but didn't say anything, his tongue was plastered to the roof of his mouth and his jealousy was tar in between his teeth. Draco didn't spare him a look as he pushed Harry into one of those big wooden chairs next to the table and that made his throat lock up even tighter for some reason he wasn't smart enough to put a name to.
Harry was as pale as Draco, his hands shaking violently and his hair matted damp with sweat against his forehead as he slumped against the wood. Draco was a thin, pale blade hovering over his cousin and his fingers lingered on Harry's shoulders, the desperation bright in his face. Dudley wanted to rip his hands away from Harry and Draco still wasn't giving him any of his usually smug blade sharp smirks and that annoyed him to no end.
"They told you not to use wandless magic" Draco's voice was as sharp and mocking as ever, there was no softness or tender edge to his voice, but there was something there and Harry's even in his infinite oblivious denial snapped his head up to look into those liquid mercury eyes. Dudley was hissing beneath his breath and his fat hands twisting together, his pretty little cousin glanced at him and the raging beast in his chest calmed slightly, he wasn't forgotten just yet. Draco eyes were still melted metal as he watched him.
The dark haired boy, bowed forward slightly and hugged at his hands, "My magic just reacts and I can't control it" he said and unfurled his fingers slowly. Sparks like miniature bolts of lightning danced between his digits, leaving small trails of burns along the white skin. There were still calluses on his finger pads but they seemed insignificant in comparison
Draco let out an angry growl and snatched at Harry's hands, their fingers were tangled together, thin and pretty, even with the burns and the bleached bone skin and Dudley hands were clumsy and fat as he watched their strange grasp.
"Just stop it," Draco snarled, his anger was always hot around Harry, "Stop it now,"
His cousin looked terribly young for a moment and his eyes were big and wild and strangely empty as he stared into Draco's pale angry face. Draco was squeezing Harry hard enough to bruise and looked a lot bigger than the dark haired boy in that moment, folded half over his shuddering form. Harry hunched forward, his forehead nearly touching Draco's chest and he was still shaking in the boy's merciless hold, pained and exhausted.
"You make me so mad" Draco murmured but his rage was just a smoulder now. There were sparks leaping out between their closed hands and their skin was blotched red and raw until Dudley couldn't tell whose was whose. They didn't even glance at him and he was glad. He didn't want to be hurt. Dudley hurt people, he didn't get hurt, not even for Harry, especially not for Harry.
"You make me so mad. No more." Draco was repeating softly, all but mouthing words against Harry's damp curls. "No more of this shit now."
He didn't have a clue what Draco was talking about, but Harry's luminous eyes were blazing wide against the dark material of the other's boys shirt, he pushed himself back away and against the wood of the chair, staring up at Draco, his lips pressed together in one thin line. Their hands were red raw and starting to discolour but there was no sparks left anymore and Harry pulled him limbs away, his eyes were staring at his palms angrily and that big veil of denial was sliding right across his face once again.
He shoved his battered hands up into the extra depths of his jumper and slid around Draco, mumbling his thanks before fleeing the room.
"Harry" Draco called after him softly, his voice was broken and hoarse and didn't carry far enough. His small, dark haired cousin ran away and Dudley was viciously happily and hissed his laughter at Draco's empty white face cruelly.
Draco snarled and spun around and hit at him wildly, his anger cold and hot and undecided as he overturned the chair Harry had been sitting on. Dudley was laughing, really, really laughing then. He was laughed at Draco's rejection, at the pretty person's rejection and his relief that Harry was still alone, Harry alone meant he was still Dudley's at least on some level, but better he wasn't Draco's or Ginny. Dudley would rather not have his stupid, pretty cousin than let anyone else have even a piece of him.
Draco was spiting his anger and raised his fist to hit him then, ice and diamonds and as fragile as Harry in every contrasting way. Dudley smirked and narrowed his fat beady, ugly eyes spitefully as he continued to laugh.
"You're bloody sick mate"
Draco was still, staring at him, his eyes wide and hatefully as his own words were repeated back at him. For some reason Dudley was reminded of a single silvery trail that had followed the boy's cheek the night before.
But Draco wasn't as good at denial as Harry was.
Jees, its still not finished, I'm on twenty one pages now and theres still quite a bit to go. This last scene wasn't planned, actually I wanted to include a different scene there to finish this chapter off but then Harry went all sparky and Draco went all well... however you wish to view it.
Some Character Notes
Dudley and Draco have a very unhealthy and twisted relationship in this, its completly dependant on Harry and that means it changes its form when ever the situation with Harry changes, which while being quite irratic is bloody fun to write. Dudley was a creature made from his enviroment and now everything's changed he's clinging so adamantly on to Harry because he's the last remaining link to that old world. He's so resentful and envious and obsessed with him and his emotions are consuming and ugly. He seems to be growing worse the longer he is forced into Harry's company. Draco is a lot deeper than he at first seems and sometimes about as shallow as a shower, he's a contridicting character and a nasty little bugger a lot of the time.
I love Harry, I really do. You can do so much with his character so easily and I have a bit of a main character thing anyway, however he's a bloody pain in this story. Dudley has built up this half fantasy of his cousin and considering this entire fic is through Dudley's eyes and Harry is so coloured by this fantasy of Dudley, that the real Harry is mostly a mystery to me in this, which is ironic considering everything revolves around him. Which parts of Harry are real and which parts are Dudley's imagination or contorted view? It's a tricky one. I still love him though.
Ron and Hermione, are a pair for me. I love them and am not using them half as much as they could be used, they are the counter balance to the unhealthy infactuation of Dudley and Draco. Ginny could also be lumped with Dudley and Draco, but her crush hasn't evolved into these cyles of hate, resentment and obsession that Dudley has, you can strong crushes without obsession, thus is Ginny's role. I struggle with Ginny because I disliked her in the later books. I find her easier to like when I write her myself, she's a young teenage girl not a magical powerhouse and as with every relationship I seem to write, her love is only a step away from hate.
Its a thin line.
REVIEWS: What you think of Harry in this?
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