*Alex*

I hate hospitals full of dark energy, death, loss, hate, regretted and misery, on top of the bullshit they put you thru good thing I know how to remove a catheder. The next time I poked my head out into the room it was empty and I searched out some clothes and I was out of there. I hopped buses and shared more than one cab to get to Hollywood and vine. Which is where luck would have it I saw someone I did not expect to ever see again. Jessie was standing outside the pink dot.

"Alex! You're a sight for sore eyes!" Jessie called out as he jogged over.

"Hi… I need a ride," I smiled fakily at him.

"Have you seen any of the guys I can`t get anyone to answer the phone?" Jessie answered.

"Jess! Give me a ride and I`ll tell you everything I know." I was really struggling to hold it together.

"Alright… Let's go…" He said wrapping an arm around me and leading me to his car.

"Take me to Vic`s please." I grasped.

"Sure thing?" He was uneasy now.

*Mindy*

"Alex is gone…" Joey grumbled and I felt my heart sink. "She bailed? Any clues where she is?" He continued and it was like someone goosed me,

"She`s at Vic`s guarantee it." I cried out.

"Alright let's go get her." Joey said pulling his keys from his pocket.

"Wait! We should give her some time to say her goodbyes," Amber interrupted everyone,

"Do you think there is not something in that house she can pen her final strokes with?" Joey roared at Amber like I`ve never seen him act toward anyone.

"Oh… I didn`t think of that…" Amber said meekly.

"Come on let's get going she can`t have much a head start on us." Chris said leading the way out of the hospital.

I was a jumble of emotions at what we would find at the manchion in the hills, Alex`s Body curled in his bed or on the flagstone where she had tried so hard to save him, Alex alive but broken or nothing at all an empty house.

*Alex*

Jessie was silent sitting across from me in the car staring up at that massive house that at one time I saw as my fairytale ending now I saw it as a horror movie set. "Jessie… I`m sorry but as far as I know Vic…Vic… is "I was stammering choking back sobs, "Vic is dead and his mother and tommy took him somewhere." I spit the words out finally and fled the car for the front steps. Whoever was the last person thru the door had locked it but I pulled the hidden key from in the flowers in a stone urn and went inside locking the door behind me.

"Ugh!" I grimaced smelling the stale recycled air and panic swelled within me over powering my reason and rushed thru the house opening windows and doors, "Vic hates that smell." I headed up to our bedroom and started the shower, the hottest water I could stand and wandered the bathroom waiting till the steam was thick enough to clean the sick feeling from my gut by surrounding me by a fuzzy mist. I brushed my teeth and drank some water before getting under the hot spray to discover I hadn`t undressed. I started to laugh with an unsettling edge of hysteria to it before my mind spit up a perfect memory of Vic and I laughing and dancing together in Portland after the show when we had gotten locked out of the buses and the arena it had ended with both of us soaking wet and kissing pressed against the side of the bus. When I returned to reality I was sitting in the corner of the slate shower sobbing under the hot spray. "Vic …" I sobbed feeling like my heart was shredded. By the time I realized I was out of control I had let a scream past my lips and heard the sound of glass shattering around me. "Shit" I gasped clamoring to my feet feeling bad that I had just destroyed Vic`s bathroom. It's not Vic`s bathroom anymore he`s gone I told myself over and over again. I found myself wondering who would get the house and his things, such a petty thought to have but I would want something's for his child to have and know little something about his father and in that moment I knew what Kieran had meant that if I knew what to notice I would know That yes I would have his child. My brother would be relieved I`m sure, I have a reason to live for now at least. I will have Victor`s son, yes a son that feeling said it would be a boy, Growing in my body and I would be damned if his son would be lost from this world. However for now I was still busted into pieces over the loss of the man that defined my world for me.

I tip toed thru the shards of glass and mirror littering the floor and slipped into the darkened bedroom where I pulled off all my clothes and crawled into his bed. I pressed my face into his pillow which still carried his scent to my surprise, and slipped off to sleep.