Sorry it took so long, I had a brain block for a few days. But here it is, chapter two! A first part of secrets being revealed...hehe.
And also, Scout's first name, Gillian, is pronounced "Gil-lian" or something like that. That's how I want it, real name or not, LOL. BTW, since Nick called her Wynnie last chapter, I should probably state her full name before she does: Gillian Scout Gwendolyn Sidle. There...phew! I couldn't deal with a name like that for me, but I guess that's why she goes by Scout :P
And also, for those reading my other fan-fic Once Upon A Time, a chapter will more than likely be up later on today...with evilness, of course. Just putting some last minute fixer-uppers into it. Mwahahaha...*cough*...ha!
Any-hoo *whistles*...on with the fic! And please don't ask *hits head*...I'm just really really hyper tonight...this morning...whatever you want to call it. LOL.
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"Scout...where are you...Scout?"
Scout snickered from her hiding place as Wyatt, Uncle Nick's son, hollered for her, not being able to find her. She found it slightly amusing. He was five, and he followed her around like a little puppy dog. She guessed that Uncle Nick's baby-sitter flaked out on him, as well. Especially when she heard babbling.
"Oh, man!" she muttered to herself.
Uncle Nick's baby-sitter must not have known that little children should be seen, and not heard. Why leave a five-year-old and a three-year-old just wandering around the lab? Well, of course where Scout was right now, she couldn't see them. But it upset her because she was always the one to watch them, and for once she just wanted to read and be left alone. After all that had gone on tonight, she didn't really care for people, right now.
"Hey...are you two looking for Scout? Do you know where she is?"
Scout would pick up that nervousness anywhere. And what was mildly amusing was that they were all only a few feet away from her. See, in the breakroom the couch was pulled out just barely enough for her to slide behind. Curtain doors were sewn to the sides, and everything was already back there, ready for her when she arrived. She had blankets, flashlights, books, batteries...it was her place from the world.
Was it a wonder at all who her parents were?
"We not know." She had to snicker a little at Kaylee's vocabulary. She knew that Kay was only three, but it still amused her to no end. And Kaylee knew it.
"Well, will you all help me look for her?"
"There's no need."
All three were looking in the direction to where the phantom voice was coming from. Scout came out of her hiding place with one book, dusting herself off.
"Well, looks like I'm going to need a new hiding place."
Scout knew that she sounded cranky, but who could blame her? She wished she was still grounded from the lab at times like these. At least then she could be alone and get some reading done. Because, besides the little hint she had given her father, earlier, she didn't want to be bothered with it all. She didn't want to deal with it. In that respect, she was just like him, not wanting to deal with emotions. He left, and yes, she was mad, but she didn't want a part in it, at all. Instead, she just wanted to read...alone.
Sitting on the couch, Scout pulled her legs to her chest, keeping her book closed. She wouldn't get much reading done, now.
Grissom sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. The familiarity of this girl was too great for him, indeed. But he knew with the young children around, he wouldn't be able to get through to her. He bent down to the two, smiling at them. "Guys, I think that Judy at the desk has got some candy. She always does. And I'm sure that if you two are really nice to her, she might give you some."
Both kids smiled wildly. "Okay!"
"But I no guy," little Kaylee said. "I a girl."
And with a small snicker from Grissom, Wyatt took his sister's hand and led her out.
Grissom didn't know how he was going to handle this, but he knew he needed to. He slowly walked over to the couch, almost as if Scout's form was that of a wild beast, who would strike at the quickest, yet smallest move.
Scout looked over and glared, but didn't strike.
Grissom finally settled down and sat by her on the couch. He folded his hands in his lap and looked at them as if he were reading a book and not the lines in his hands. A book was far more interesting, after all.
"So, I guess we just broke up your party...I'm sorry about that."
Scout shrugged. She shouldn't be mad at him, but she couldn't help it. If he only knew...but she shouldn't tell him. And she wouldn't.
"It's fine. It happens all the time."
She was bored, so she lay her head on her knees, not wanting to look at him. Then she decided that was in poor form, so she sat up, moved her knees into an Indian Style position, and got her book out from beside her. She opened it to where she left off, and began to read. Or rather, pretend to read. Even though she wouldn't deal with her emotions, she was mildly interested in the man that her mother called her father. So, in the end she allowed his presence. But in a way, she wasn't really giving him her time. Not to him, anyways.
"So, you...like to read, huh? Like your mom does?"
Scout shrugged, but then nodded. "Yeah. She keeps saying that she's running out of books to buy me, but I don't know why. In a way I'll read anything, but I mostly like mysteries, ghost stories, text books about science and crime scene investigation, math text books...as long as it's not that romance junk, or stupid stories about stupid children who cheat their best friends or get mad at them and then set out for revenge. I don't like reading those kind of books." She finally looked up at him, her blue eyes shining.
Her eyes...his eyes.
She may have been a young child with a ponytail, gap toothed grin, scrawny arms and dirty clothes, but he could tell that she had a lot about her that you had to look into her eyes to see, and it was all a secret. He knew it all too well, because that's how he was. He could see the same pain in her that he felt ever since he left, and he suddenly regretted it as the biggest mistake of his life. He knew that her whole being was a front, now, so that she could hide from people. But did she do this with her mother? With Sara, the only woman he allowed into his life, into his heart? He suddenly felt that the girl was more familiar than what he'd first initially thought. He just couldn't put his finger on it.
Why am I talking to him? Scout thought to herself. She wasn't wanting to let him in, but he had this sort of energy...pull about him. She couldn't help but be intrigued, and she wished to God that she wasn't. Why couldn't she just stay away from him, physically and mentally? As she looked at him, saw his change of emotion, she knew that he was getting her...the way that her mother got her. Nobody else knew that deep into her, and he didn't even know her, technically, so why was her soul allowing him in?
Scout suddenly became very nervous. She couldn't deal with this...not tonight.
"I um...I've...I've got to go...go to the restroom." She put her book down by accident and basically bolted off the couch, not stopping until she reached her destination. The women's restroom. He couldn't get to her, in there, and at least now she'd have some time to compose herself.
Going over to the sink, she turned on the tap, letting the water warm before gently and slowly splashing it onto her face. She plugged up the drain, letting the water fill the sink. When did this become the night from hell? Did God have it in for her, now, for never going to church?
"Alright, I get it," she said out loud to no one in particular as she leaned on the counter, dunking her head under the faucet. As her face became submerged, her letters were becoming hard to understand. She still said them, anyways, coming up ever moment or so for air. "I'll be good...I'll go to church...just let it go back to normal. Mom doesn't need him...I don't need him. We were fine until he came along." She noticed the sink overflowing when her pants became soaked, and she noticed it leaking...or rather, overflowing onto the floor. "Oh, great," she mumbled, turning the sink off and letting the water out. She sighed. Getting some towels, she started to clean it up, not noticing that someone had been standing there the entire time.
Until she cleared her voice.
Scout looked up, worry lines etched all over her face, until she saw that it was only her Aunt Catherine.
"Oh...hi."
"Hi, my little genuis," Catherine said, then grinned. "You do know that we have showers back there, right?"
"Uh...yeah," Scout said, finishing her cleaning before standing up, the excess water on her clothes dripping out onto the floor. She stomped her foot, pouting. "Can't I catch a break?" She was tired, cranky...she just wanted sleep or somewhere to relax, but she didn't have that luxury here.
Catherine started to feel bad for her little niece. She went over, kissing her forehead. "We'll call janitorial to clean this up. Now how about we go and get you a change of clothes from your mom's locker, and then we'll go and get something to eat? My treat."
Scout smiled. Someone who finally understood her. "Okay."
As they walked towards the door, Catherine stopped, kneeling down to her level. "Honey...are you upset because of who came tonight?"
Scout became defensive, crossing her arms over her chest. "How could you tell?" She hated being mad, but she couldn't help it. She hated talking. Biting her lip, she sighed. She hated being treated like a child...sometimes.
Catherine looked away a moment, feeling bad, before looking back at her. "Honey...Gillian...none of this is your fault. And you shouldn't blame him until you talk to him."
"But I did--"
But Catherine wouldn't hear of excuses. In ten minutes, they wouldn't be able to talk about much...at least not of anything that mattered much. "I mean, really talk to him, Gillian. Let him in...let him know who you are...how you feel about all of this." She could tell that Scout was fighting the urge to run away, right now. Catherine took a deep breath in, becoming frustrated, but calmed a little as she slowly let it out. "I'll tell you what--where do you want to eat more than anywhere, tonight?"
Scout was shocked...she rarely got to eat out. They joked about eating out, or were serious about it like they were eating out, but they rarely ever did. At least not when her mother was around. She had some sort of aversion to fast food places...at least for some time, now. Scout really didn't know why, either. It kind of perplexed her.
Smiling, Scout finally gave her Aunt her answer. "I guess Freddie's Pizzeria." She loved animals, but wasn't a vegetarian like her mother. Her motto: If they're dead, they chose to be that way. Her mother blamed it all on Uncle Nick...he gave her her first slice of pizza when she was three, and she hasn't been able to stop eating meat, since. Only problem was that her mother didn't allow her to eat out, so rarely did anyone else. So tonight was a treat for her...except for the whole 'MIA Father' who decides to randomly show up for some ungodly reason. It was going to be a long night for her...a long night, indeed.
Catherine smiled at her, ruffling her hair. "Alright, here's the deal...you go and talk to him, and I will go and get us pizza."
Scout sighed...that was the kicker. She thought about it for a moment, and Catherine was worried until her little genuis of a niece looked back up, again, a broad smile on her face.
"With extra sausage and pepperoni?"
Catherine found herself chuckling at that. "With extra sausage and pepperoni." And with that, they went their separate ways.
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Gilbert Grissom was a very intelligent man, no one could ever doubt that. But when it came to love, family, matters of the heart, he was...well...he was dense, confused, dead as a door knob kind of thing. And Scout knew this. How would she be able to get through to him without throwing herself out there?
Shaking her head, she found herself back in the break room. Grissom had a cup of what looked to be coffee, but was in his same spot...comfortable distance between him and where she was sitting. She was wanting to sit at the table, but opted for the seat next to him. It just seemed easier to her, and better to relax on. She was tired, she just hoped she didn't fall asleep.
Once she was settled, she pulled a throw blanket over her. It may have been April, but she still found herself a little chilled...probably just because she was tired.
After a few moments of silence, she finally decided to speak. "I'm sorry about that. I'm just not...used to being...around...new people." There. That was safe for her to say. He was new to her, even though she already knew him, slightly, like an open book.
He smiled at her. "It's fine." As he looked at her, though, he saw that same sadness still evident in her features. That's when something that Nick had said earlier began seeping back into his mind. "So...what does your father do?"
This was just too unreal for her. She sarcastically smiled, shaking her head. "I...really don't know. I know it's like what my mother does, but I'm not sure. I've never met him." There...she was playing it safe. Not too much info, but just enough. Man, he was really dense! Most of that was common knowledge to people.
"Did he leave? Die?"
"He...he left, before I was born," Scout answered with a shrug. "I don't even think he knew about me."
"I'm sorry," Grissom replied, his tone soft. But something kept nagging at him, something that he hadn't allowed himself to think, but was beginning to. But he, as well, played it safe. He was getting more than what Scout gave him credit for. "So--"
But at that moment, he turned away, and that was when the inevitable happened. It was like when a victim was at the wrong place at the wrong time, only hers him turning away just as her hearing went away. She supposed she would call it having the wrong ears at the wrong time.
She knew that it was a condition passed down...that her father had it...her grandmother. Big clue for him, but why it had to happen now, she'd never know. She tapped his shoulder, getting him to look at her. When he looked, she smiled weakly. "Sometimes, I don't hear so well. Could you please talk to where I can read your lips?"
His shocked expression was priceless to her...the 'deer-in-the-headlights', 'jaw dropped to infinity' kind of thing. But if he knew, he didn't let on other than that.
Grissom kept his gaze on her, not knowing what to think. But it all started to click. That's when he decided to make friends with her, maybe get her to open up a little more so that Gil could find out what in the world was going on here. He was still so confused about everything, and began to feel a migraine coming on.
He finally spoke slow for her, allowing her to read his lips as he said, "So...Scout...that's an interesting name. Is it a nickname?"
Scout was confused that out of all things, he wanted to talk about her name. But God forbid her and strike her down, but she liked it...she allowed it. "It's my name," she said, shrugging. "My middle name, or rather one of them, but I like it the best."
Grissom smiled. She was adorable, and this side of her was different. She was very intelligent, he knew that from the start, but now...now she was allowing herself to be a child, even if just for a moment. He liked that. Children shouldn't grow up too fast...not like she had.
"Three names?" he asked with a slight chuckle. Even though she couldn't hear, she could detect the chuckle, and she, too, let one out. "So...what are your other names?"
"Gwendolyn is my second middle name," Scout replied softly, finally allowing her guard to be put back up...at least over half-way. She didn't know if she should allow herself to say the rest or keep it a secret...she finally decided on the latter. "I won't say my first name."
Grissom became more confused, but finally decided that all of this was a mistake, convinced himself of that, and concluded that she just had one of those embarassing names that she didn't care to share.
But Grissom was wrong. He just didn't know how wrong he could be, or that a person could be as wrong as he was...as wrong as he found out only moments after talking with someone that he would've killed to have seen, now, before tonight...if he had known she existed.
He didn't know why, but he soon would.
"Why can't you tell me? Or rather, why won't you say?" He was inquisitive of this little girl, this genuis that seemed so vaguely familiar to him. He didn't know why, but he had to know her name.
He knew that she was insistant upon him not knowing. She didn't say in so many words, but he knew.
"I just...can't. I'm named after my father...sort of. And if I tell you, you'll know who he is, and my mom won't like that at all."
She was hesistant, but at the same time she was becoming frustrated and wanted to give up. He chuckled, cocking his head to the side. "Why? What if she didn't know?"
"She'd find out...eventually," Scout answered, raising her eyebrows with a 'what do you think, she's stupid' look. She shook her head, feeling a big migraine coming on. She rubbed her temples, giving in. "You'll regret it."
"I will?"
"Yep."
The little girl on the couch was tired of hiding secrets, lying, telling 'false truths' as her mother called them. And in a way, she wanted to know this man, deep down, although she wouldn't admit it. And she was afraid, because she knew that soon, he might...he wouldn't want to know her.
"Gillian." She pursed her lips together in thought for a moment. "And it's Gil-Lian, not Jillian."
Grissom had to allow that name to set with him, before he brought up his hand to his mouth in shock, not able to take his eyes off of the little girl before him. Gil...Gillian. It fit. Perfectly. And now he was beginning to understand. Her hearing loss, her familiarity to him, her being almost a carbon copy of him with her brains and her attitude of wanting to be alone. The other side, her emotional breaks every now and then and her sassy attitude...that side was one side that belong to her and her mother, alone...no doubt about it.
As he got a closer look at her, he saw her deep sea eyes...they were just like his...how in the world did he miss this?
"Yeah," Scout said off-hand. "You're my dad. And uh..dad, we uh...we have a problem here." Scout was looking out towards the door. Grissom was too shocked to look at first, until finally Scout waved her hand. As he turned his head, he heard Scout spit out familiar, yet foreign words.
"Hi mom."
Grissom finally saw Sara, arms crossed over chest, a mixture of emotions playing on her face from depressed to disappointed to shocked...you name it, it was there. Her foot was tapping at the ground, a nervous habit she'd had for some time now.
He knew that she was mad, and he couldn't blame her. He left her, alone...she raised a child, alone, and here he was, years later, and what it probably seemed like to her was that he was expecting an instant family. But that wasn't so.
He loved Sara, with all of his heart. He believed in being honest, and he had to tell her why he didn't come back sooner, especially if it was the last thing that he would do.
But she was mad...still. And again, he didn't blame her.
"Gil-Lian, please excuse us."
"But--" Scout started, but was cut off. Well...looks like she set her father up to be slaughtered.
"No buts, miss." With that, Scout looked at her father, whispering that she was sorry before getting up, walking out. As she passed her mother, her mother whispered, "We'll have a talk later."
"Oh, man!" Scout groaned as she walked out.
Sara stood there, not wanting to sit. Before they delved into the past, she had one thing on her mind that she had to know. And he was about to open his mouth before she beat him to it.
But it was her voice. Not of anger, but of sadness...a sadness that she felt so deep, so real, that she could burst into tears at any moment. That's what got to him more than anything.
"Why, Gil? Just tell me why."
And within seconds, the past ten years flashed before his life as he remembered the nightmare that kept him away from his family, his friends. He took in a deep breath, gulped, and sighed before saying what he knew would break Sara's heart and confuse her all at the same time:
"Sara...hun...you might want to sit for this."
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Hmm...
And, in a way, I wasn't sure about this chapter. But I kept waiting and waiting and that's what my evil mind came up with...hehe. Don't worry, it'll get better...I pwomise ;P ...hehe.
And P.S. I wanted to put this up ASAP, since it has been a while. I'm not really checking typos tonight, so if any are in this fic, please overlook them and I'll fix them as soon as I can. Thanks!
~*~*CSISaraSidle72*~*~