I sit at home, waiting for Isaac to come home, and as I do, I think about what happened between Stiles and I last year.
I'd smelt some kind of suppressed emotional response when Stiles named me Miguel. It irked me. I'd been noticing feelings for Stiles since he'd saved me from the bullet, and the scent had spiked some jealousy in me. When it was time for Danny to go, I'd spread myself out on Stiles' bed. I heard him come in and sat up, looking at him.
"Miguel, huh? Cute name. Where did you hear it?"
"I had a friend named Miguel." Stiles' scent changed to one of nervousness and, strangely, sadness. I narrowed my eyes at him.
"A friend?" Stiles rolled his eyes at me and sighed.
"Before Lydia, I had a crush on this kid Miguel. He was sweet, and older, and – why am I even telling you this?" He was quickly getting flustered, and I felt a squeeze in my chest.
Maybe, if Stiles had had liked a guy before, he could like me. And if he'd given me the name of a previous crush, then maybe he liked me too? I'd had to reel in my emotions then; I needed to make sure that Stiles really did like me before jumping to any conclusions.
"Why did you give me the name of a previous crush?"
Stiles shook his head. "It was the first name that came to my head. It doesn't mean anything." I stood up and looked at his sideways, tilting my head. He was really flustered, and was blushing. It made me wanted to take his face in my hands and kiss him into oblivion.
"Do I remind you of him?"
Stiles snorted, and I pulled back my emotions yet again. I was getting an array of mixed messages, and it was making me frustrated. "Did you miss the part where I said he was sweet?"
I heard the bitterness when he said 'sweet', and moved towards him. "What happened?"
He blinked, and his eyes looked wet. Again, I felt the urge to kiss him. "I confessed, grade five. He punched me in the face, told his parents and moved to a different school." I felt a flush of anger when he said the kid had punched him in the face. "Can we talk about something else, please?"
I stood behind Stiles, breathing deeply. I was worried by the smell. "Stiles, why do you smell of sadness?"
"Because I'm sad." His scent changed to angry, and he whirled around. I caught his face in my hands and kissed him fiercely. I felt my heart surge in my chest. He resisted for a few seconds, and I worried that I'd read him wrong, but he relaxed, kissing me back. He moaned, and I fully lost control. I needed him, now, and I pushed him against the wall, ravaging his mouth. My hands started roaming, taking in every inch of him, his smell filling my nostrils, making me incredibly aroused. I didn't hear the front door open, but Stiles did, and he pushed me away.
I left not long after that to take care of my problem.
I smiles, reaching down to take my cock in hand, slowly starting to jerk off. I jump when the door is flung open. I think it's strange for Isaac to be so violent. Besides, it's too early. I make my way down the stairs, calling down to Isaac at the front door.
"You back already, Isaac?" I descend the stairs, and as I do, I see Stiles. My heart stops. He's sobbing, tears streaking down his cheeks. I feel a flash of anger towards whoever made him like this. I'm torn between ripping everything apart and cradling Stiles to my chest until he stopped crying. Instead, I ask, from my position, because I physically cannot move. "Stiles? What's wrong? What happened? Are you okay?"
My heart breaks even further as he starts to speak. He sounds so small and weak. "Derek, I – I need a place to stay for a while. I'm sorry I just…I – " His knees give out, and I use my werewolf speed to catch him. I lead him to the couch and sit him down before doing so myself. "God, this is so stupid."
I was perplexed, and inquired. I felt almost hesitant to hear the answer, but I steeled myself; I would be here for Stiles, no matter what. "What is? What happened?"
"Nothing, but that's the problem. I wanted… I wanted… I don't know what I wanted, but it wasn't this. I just…I don't know. I don't know anymore. What the hell is wrong with me?" I was even more confused than before, but I waited. I knew stiles would tell me in his own time, and I smelt appreciation, presumably from this gesture.
"You know how all of those sacrifices were virgins?" I nod slowly. "Well, I was talking – " He pauses to let sobs shake his small frame. I feel like taking him in my arms again, but fight off the urge. He would touch me if he wanted to. He would initiate any and all contact. Of this I am determined.
"I was talking with Scott about it, about how I – " Stiles shivers. "About how I'm a virgin too, and how my virginity is literally a threat to my health and then Da – "
His voice breaks, and he starts sobbing in full force yet again. He throws himself at me, and I catch him with both ease and surprise. He sobs into my neck, making fists in my shirt. I put my arms around him, soaring on a cloud at the intimacy of the situation, hating myself for finding pleasure in this. He carries on with the story, but I have a feeling I know what's coming. I feel a growl rise in my throat, but I shove it back down. Nothing happened. I remind myself, but it barely calms me. This kid broke Stiles' heart, and I wanted to rip his heart out of his chest.
"Danny – he said he'd help me, have sex with me, and I don't know why, but I – I wanted it, but he said he was joking, and I – I didn't know where else to go." When he said he wanted it, I nearly cried out in despair, but I held it in. Stiles isn't mine, and I couldn't treat him like he is. So instead, I held him tighter, bringing my hand up to thread in the hair at his neck. He didn't respond, so I slowly ran my fingers through his hair. I pulled us further onto the couch, caressing him until he fell asleep.
When we wake up, I find Stiles looking at me. I open my mouth to speak, but he beats me to it. "Do you remember kissing me? Before, when you were hiding from the police?"
God, how could I ever forget? "Yeah?"
Stiles looks down at his hands, suddenly unsure of himself. "Do you think we could do that again?"
My heart skips a beat, and I have to calm myself down yet again. I have to remember that Stiles is experiencing a lot of emotions at this point in time, and I want to make sure that he wants this. "If you think it'll help you."
"I don't know what's going to help me, but I know that I want to feel your lips again." I give a little smile, barely believing my good fortune. I lean towards him, and he leans towards me, and I feel fire run through my veins as we connect. My hands cup his face, and he does the same. Without breaking contact, I push him back onto the couch, making sure to be gentle, allowing him plenty of time to pull away. He doesn't though, so I get on all fours and swoop down to deepen the kiss, delving my tongue into his mouth. Stiles doesn't really touch me or anything, just letting me love him, and it makes a thrill go up my spine, to know that he trusts me this much. I pull myself away from his lips, kissing down his neck, his jaw line, his ear, loving the noises it draws forth.
Stiles puts his hands on either side of my face, holding me in place. I worry that I went too far, but he says my name breathily, and it comforts me. "Derek" I smile and kiss him again, lingering for longer this time. I remembered back to the conversation last night and pull away again.
"Did you know that it was pure torture, hearing you talk about him, telling me that it was your desire for him that got you hurt?"
"I'm sorry. I only want you." I look down at him, thinking about how beautiful he is. I sigh in happiness, believing every single word, and lean down to kiss him again. He stops me though, putting his hand on my shoulder and locking his elbows. He didn't have to use any force at all, but the restraining arm was rigid, as though he thought I would just keep going. I felt a little deflated at this gesture, but was quickly reassured by his following words. "I mean it. I love you."
My heart hammers in my chest. I feel like I'm going to faint, but I smile wide and bright, voicing my reciprocated feelings. "I love you, too."
The rest of our evening is lost in a symphony of kisses. Stiles ends up on top of me, and I run my hand through his hair. Isaac comes home at some point, and looks at us funnily, but walks upstairs when I glare at him.