Don't remember that rush of joy
He could be that boy
I'm not that girl
He pleaded me to follow his lead, and strangely enough, I acquiesced. I trailed his footsteps, finding myself in an elegant living room. He had already taken a place on the couch. Still filled with light animosity, I chose to sit on a less comfortable chair. After taking a deep breath, I spoke. "Whether or not you approve of your marriage doesn't change the fact that it's valid, Tommy."
He raised a hand to his mouth, cascading it there. I observed the way his body was trembling slightly. Swallowing, I prayed for guidance.
"If I could take it back I would." He stated lamely.
"What, marrying her? Or using me to cheat on her?" My explosion was cold, adding to the tension building so ominously within the small room.
His gaze was soft. "You know as well as I do that it was not like that." His voice wavered. He seemed on the brink of tears.
"Then how was it?" I spat vehemently, the stiff fabric of the chair suddenly burning my skin. I leapt up and in an instant began to pace the expensive carpet of the extremely narrow room. I felt his eyes follow my every footstep, but he remained silent. This outraged my already much tormented being. "How did you think this would end?"
A strangled sob escaped his lips at this question. He bowed his head, shaking it softly. Strangely, his pain mirrored the sensation that was beginning to build in the pit of my own stomach. "There's no such thing as a happy ending, baby." My voice was unrecognizable from the previous outburst. It gave off the air of a mother comforting her boo-boo laden child, timid and soothing. The unwarranted change in misdemeanor disgusted me.
Ev'ry so often we long to steal
To the land of what-might-have-been
I sunk to my knees, cradling them to my chest. I squatted there mere feet from his shaking body, for what seemed an eternity. I barely noticed when his weight shifted from the couch and he sunk to my level on the floor, wringing his hands halfheartedly.
He cleared his throat, and finally broke the ensuing silence. "Do you love me?" I moved my gaze from my bare kneecaps to his face as a symbol of respect he neither deserved nor commanded, and nodded truthfully. His expression remained stoic, and he began to lean in until the tip of his nose barely brushed mine. I wanted so badly to pull away, forever shatter the moment. I wanted to tell him it was over, walk out the door and never have to feel anything for this man ever again. But sadly, none of that was at all possible at present.
"Then run away with me." He breathed softly. "Be my one and only, 'til death do us part." His body shook with the air of a nervous schoolboy as he reached blindly for my hand. Securing it, he began to kiss my fingertips lovingly, never taking his eyes from mine. My heart fluttered at an alarming rapidity as my eyes shut slowly in elation. I opened my mouth to object, but no sound uttered from their depths. Five more minutes, my mind screamed. Just five more minutes of sinful naivety, and then I would be forced to shuttle back to reality.
"I want you…all of you, now and forever." His voice tickled my fingertips, and a soft smile brushed my lips. "Please." He emphasized. At that request, the tension reached an unfathomable level. Succumbing to what we both wanted, I crashed my lips upon his, leaning forward so that he lost his balance. We rocketed backwards and landed in a haphazard heap on the carpet, holding on to each other for dear life. I toyed with his collar feverishly as he brought both hands to my cheeks, stroking them ever so languidly.
But that doesn't soften the ache we feel
When reality sets back in
Suddenly, I became aware of a sharp pain in my lower right earlobe. Wincing in disgust, I attempted to pull away, only to experience more discomfort. It seemed that his hand was caught on one of the simple diamond stud I always donned, a gift from the devil himself. He feverishly struggled to separate us, finally succeeding and bringing his hand back to my line of vision. When I observed what had caused the predicament, however, my heart sunk.
A thick golden band decorated Tom Quincy's left ring finger.
Realization hit his features immediately, and he removed it, stowing it in his jean pocket. I shook my head numbly. "Don't bother."
I held his gaze for mere seconds before standing gracefully. "Goodbye Tommy."
Turning on my heel, I made my way back into the foyer, determined to put as much distance as possible between myself and the person whose feeble pleas of forgiveness would discontinue affecting me. I was immune, and this was finally over.
My hand closed firmly around the door knob, and I became vaguely aware of my name being called. However, the door was half open before I realized it was woman's voice that had spoken. Sighing in frustration, I relinquished my grip, allowing the portal to close. Turning on my heel, I smiled as faintly as was possible in the current situation, meeting my sister's confused gaze.
Blithe smile, lithe limb
She who's winsome, she wins him
"You're here early." She stated cheerfully, embracing me lovingly.
I remained stiff, but attempted to answer with the same degree of affection. "I had to drop off some paperwork." I lied quickly, pulling at my blouse self-consciously. I watched in relief as she nodded understandingly.
"We didn't want to wake you, darling."
Sadie turned towards the direction of his voice, grinning stupidly as he emerged from the shadows. Wrapping an arm around her waist, he placed a chaste kiss upon her lips. After greeting, the couple turned their attention towards me once more. His arm remained latched protectively around her midriff, however. I felt sick.
Gold hair with a gentle curl
That's the girl he chose
"I feel like we've barely seen each other these last few weeks. With you and Tommy spending all these late nights in the studio, I've almost forgotten what both of you look like." She chuckled softly, mussing her hair slightly.
A poignant silence ensued, during which I smiled awkwardly. "I'm sorry for waking you." I muttered softly.
"Oh, don't worry about it. I'm actually glad you're here, because I was meaning to call you today. We," she gesticulated between herself and Tommy, "have news."
Sadie was grinning so widely that I felt like smacking her. Tommy, on the other hand, looked sick. "Don't." His voice was barely audible, hoarse and pleading.
"Don't be silly sweetie." Sadie's attention turned to me, her skin glowing despite the earliness of the hour. The silk nightgown she wore hung beautifully on her delicate curves. "He listened too much to the doctor when she told us couples don't typically make their pregnancies known until the second trimester."
And Heaven knows
I'm not that girl