Chapter 2
"All rise for the judge from Hell, Judge WS." Bankotsu said as WS walked unto his podium, gesturing for the crowd to sit down.
"So, what's the case?"
"Let's just say you called it." Bankotsu said as he handed the case file to WS, who read it and grinned from ear to ear. "Send them in." He said, clapping his hands together in an excited manner. The plaintiff and defendant walked to their respective desks, watching the judge who continued.
"So, Kagome, you're suing Mukotsu for attempted rape; let's get this case started." WS said, gesturing to Kagome.
"Hello again, your honor; during the resurrection of the Band of Seven, I was poisoned, rendered unable to move and almost raped before Sesshamoru came to my rescue thankfully."
"Mukotsu, what is your weak and barely credible defense?"
"Well, I just wanted a bride and most of them tend to run away once they see my face."
"You mean run to the hills, jump into the sky, and hurtle themselves into the sun because your face will haunt them for time to come?"
"Not to that extent, but yes." Mukostu answered, the audience laughing behind him. "Anyway, I'm sure though she would've wanted it, I mean no one else complains." Mukotsu gestured at himself. Retching and vomiting erupted through the courtroom as Kagome fell over into the trashcan to vomit.
WS, after wiping his mouth, drank down some water and ate a Mentos. "Mukotsu, I'll just be real with you: poisoning someone to the extent that they can't reject you…doesn't imply consent. IT'S STILL FUCKING RAPE!"
"But…"
"But your ass, which is what your face looks like." WS said, slamming down his gavel. "Face it: if you had millions of dollars and were in the modern era, you would be one lonely ass millionaire because, once again, every woman who comes up to you will run for the hills, jump into the sky, and hurtle themselves into the sun BECAUSE YOUR FACE WILL HAUNT THEM FOR TIME TO COME!" WS yelled, slamming down his gavel. "But if you're so irresistible as you claim, bailiff," WS said, looking at Bankotsu, "get that mirror right there and put it in front of Mukotsu."
Bankotsu nodded and placed a full-length mirror in front of Mukotsu, who came up to about half of the mirror. Once he smiled and posed in front of the mirror, the glass shattered and the mirror suddenly flew into the air and hurtled itself into the sun, leaving a hole in the roof.
"That was my favorite mirror, you're paying for that." WS said as he sighed. "Anyway, I'm ruling in favor of the plaintiff, Kagome, and I'm sentencing this…abomination of mankind, and any other kind there is, to be placed into a retirement home, unable to move, and having a girlfriend/nurse named Bubba, next case!"
"No wait, can't Sango be my nurse?" Mukotsu asked as Bankotsu handcuffed him and began leading him to the teleporter room.
"I don't know, what do you think Sango?"
"Hell no!" She exclaimed.
"Well, then, to take their place, since you don't want that sentence and I'm feeling generous, I revoke the previous sentence and will have you rendered unmovable and you are being placed under the care of Eddie Gluskin, who can give you a bit of plastic surgery."
"Who's he?" Mukotsu asked, hope filling his little, disgusting face.
"Let's just say, no matter how ugly you are, he thinks you will make a perfect bride and is willing to 'snip off' a couple of 'things' to ensure you will fit his vision." WS said, smirking evilly as Mukotsu's hope shattered like the mirror as he was thrown into the teleporter room. "Next case!" The plaintiff and defendant walked down the aisle, one faceless, one not.
"Oh, let me fix that." WS said as he snapped, giving the man his face back.
"Thank yo…what the hell is this?" The man said, feeling his face.
"Well, I only had one in stock…or rather mind and you couldn't talk; beggars can't be choosers." WS shrugged as Muso looked forward at the judge, his Marilyn Manson face, complete with makeup, staring at WS with hate in his eyes. "So anyway, so let me read the case file; Muso is suing Muso because shortly after Muso woke up and stole faces and they didn't suit Muso's needs, Muso came and confronted Muso as a demon, but Muso saw Muso's face and wanted Muso's face, but Muso wasn't willing to give up his face to Muso cause he didn't know Muso like that and it would nasty for Muso to just give Muso his face, so Muso decided to take Muso's face by force, against Muso's wishes. Muso fought Muso off with Muso's staff but Muso was too powerful for Muso and managed to steal Muso's face and the name of Muso, effectively stealing Muso's identity and tarnishing Muso's name that he worked so hard for, so here we are today in the case of Muso v. Muso." WS read before he put the paper down, blinking. "I feel dizzy after reading that." After regaining his mental state, he nodded at Muso.
"Do I need any evidence, he has my ACTUAL face and my name." Marliyn Muso said as continued to glare at the judge.
"Stop doing that, that face makes it like twenty times more creepy." WS said, shifting uncomfortably in his chair. "Thing 2, anything in your defense?"
"Well…"
"Didn't think so." WS interrupted as he slammed the gavel down. "I rule in favor of Muso and sentence Muso to go back his rightful place in Naraku."
"Yes." Marilyn Muso cheered.
"What are you cheering for?" WS asked.
"What do yo-"
"I never said which Muso, yeah, you're both going back." With that said, Marilyn Muso looked to the side to Naraku, who had already reabsorbed Muso, staring down at him. "Can I make an appeal?"
"Denied." WS said as he slammed his gavel. After everything was said and done, WS stood up and stretched.
"Don't you think that was a bit cruel?" Bankotsu asked, watching Naraku go back to his seat.
"Are you really asking if I did something cruel?" WS said, raising an eyebrow.
"Good point." Bankotsu said, pursing his lips and nodding.
"Anyway, you're dismissed, I have to go home and take an aspirin or something, that case file still got me dizzy."
I hope you enjoyed, remember, suggestions ARE allowed, anything you want to see, I can try to make it happen in a T-rated fic. Til then, bye!