First of all I'd like to thank you guys for add my first english fanfiction to your favorites, It means a lot to me. So thank you very much N

"He needs you!"…. These words just echoed in my mind as I tried to force back a sudden memory about a pair of piercing blue eyes. I gasped for air and grabbed the wall before me for some support. I blinked several times, before I could think of what I've just heard. He was standing close behind my back, and started to take deep, calming breaths.

"It's just a dream…..you are not real…it must be my minds doing.." I whispered over, and over again, but it was useless, and he stood so close that he could hear my mumbling, and got angry.

"But I am real…you silly girl! Don't turn your back on me like I was a ghost!" He growled. And that was it. The point of no return. Even though I tried so hard to focus on something, anything that can help me calm my nerves, a boiling anger filled my heart and in one blink I moved in front of the old wizard. Cause I know, despite the gray suit which he wears to fit in my world, it was still him. A stared at him angrily.

"You…..only came back to me because you need my help!- I spat in his face fully aware of my new thunderous mood, it was not a question. It was a statement, and I saw his anger turned into fear.

But I didn't stop. Couldn't stop now. I have so many forced back, sad memories of my past from the hospital, where these people pushed me into, that I started to yell at him.

"Where have you been when my parents abandoned me and dragged me to the mad house, just because I was too old to have such an imagination about different living creatures like elves?" He swallowed hard, but didn't dare to look elsewhere as I started to circle around him as a wild cat.

"Where were you when I was screaming every single night at that godforsaken place because of my nightmares, …..cried my very soul out for help…..for your help?

"Where were you when I was alone with my belief that my adventures were true and real?

"Where were you when they forced me to take so many pills and became so numb that I couldn't feel my own heartbeat and couldn't remember where and who I was. I was nothing more than an empty shell." Slowly I started to calm dawn again. His eyes were gleaming with tears now and I got closer to stand in front of him, so that my nose was only inches away from his.

"Where were you…..when I needed your help?" I asked him quietly and crying as well. He just closed his eyes and sighed. It took me a few second to came back to my senses and sat down on the sofa staring at him. Finally he managed to look me in the eye again, and waited for me to continue. So I did.

"No, Gandalf! I will not go back there, cause I have to stop this." I motioned my hand between us.

"I know what you've been through was a real hardship, but dear Lintris…you should get back with me! It is not just your life what can be ruined, but whole Middle-Earth is in a great need of a new hero who can change the outcome of the events. It's up to you to show who you really are." He glared at me and his hardened gaze bore into mine as he wanted to give credit for his words with this act.

"Do you know how many times have I told myself that you were just a dream?" I rolled my eyes and sighed.

"I can't just act on this request like when I was 8 years old. I have a new life now..I'm, going to get married." He frowned at me and his eyes got suspicious if my words were really true, then he just nodded.

"If a marriage is what you want so be it….." He sad slowly and took a seat in front of me, but I've got a feeling that his words meant more and a mischievous glint shone in his eyes as if he knew something that he not willing to share with me soon.

"Maybe a marriage would be a good solution." He stated, but I was not sure if I can understand his new mood change about the new details of my life. There was silence between us. Neither of us wanted to start a fight again, so I just kept my mouth shut. But as I calmed down I just knelt before him and took his hand in mine. It was a strange feeling. I smiled at the touch. It was definitely real. The warmth, the scratches on his hand. I lifted my gaze to met his and brush his face with my thumb as I reached out for him to test the reality of this crazy situation. I smiled gently at him, as my old memories of our history crushed back from the dark place where I've forced them. He just stared at me with wonder and didn't know how to act.

"It looks like you are really here for me this time." I managed to say. He brushed my knuckles with his hand and smiled back, but it didn't reach his eyes. He looked like an old man, tired of the world around him, but he stood up and walked to the window.

"I know how hard it was for you. But you should understand that every event here and back in my world has it's own purpose. Maybe you should just change the perspectives and you' ll see. Nothing happened with you without any reason. It might look cruel and selfish, but you are a part of a bigger plan than you've ever imagined. When you first have arrived in Middle-Earth. I hardly understood why it happened. But your grandfather was so determined to show you around. He find peace back in our land and he wanted to share it with you. His only mistake was not telling you how to cope with this situation." He turned his face back from the outside view to me and continued.

"Have you ever imagined how that painter was capable of painting our history and gave it back to your world so realistically?..." He paused for a moment. "He never doubted your grandfather like you go now." He said with a stern tone, and my heart ached for my long gone dearly loved grandfather. I remembered him having a very loyal painter friend, who felt in love with Middle-Earth and its creatures, so he took every opportunity to listen to my grandpa telling stories of that land. He painted some of them by heart and one picture was my favorite with a certain prince on it. Gandalf's voice woke me up from my daydreaming.

"Your grandfather told him.., told his best friend stories of our land, and of our adventures. You might think that these are just fairy tales, but my dear…have you ever considered the fact how you came by that certain scar on your hand? Cause I do remember when you got it, because I was the one who tended it." He pointed his finger right on my left palm. I was confused now. Was it really happening to me? Am I truly talking to Gandalf the gray again? Was this whole madness true? I couldn't tell. But I should get some fresh air before I faint and as I was heading to the door he stood before be.

"Where is the girl who was eager to go on a new adventure?" He asked worriedly.

"She'd grown up. I just wish that those creatures were all dead. " I told him dryly. I put on my coat and grabbed for the door handle when a sudden pleading look and a question stopped me.

"Imagine if you suddenly learned that the people you knew back there, the places, the moments most important to you were not gone,... not dead...." he pushed the conversation further.

"…But worse..." He looked into my green eyes as if to try and find something what is long gone from them,but I just shook my head and turned to the door before me ignoring him.

"..they had never been?...Which was the worst?" He finished and my heart skipped a beat in that moment.