Tall Tales – Part 2 Fireside Stories
Disclaimer and Author Note: See Part 1
***Eureka***Eureka***Eureka***Eureka***Eureka*** Part II
The idea of Josefina Lupo telling him stories all night was … oddly endearing. Moreover, he couldn't see any danger in it. Maybe he'd misjudged her; that had been happening a lot lately… at least, well, hadn't it? Uncomfortably reminded that his current fuzziness made it impossible to know for sure, Zane ate another handful of trail mix and chose to consider her proposition instead of his predicament.
Stories. His earliest memories were of curling on his grandmother's lap while she read him fairytales – in fact, that's how he'd learned to read. Of course they'd progressed to reading classics by the time he was four, with Zane doing the reading. He'd always loved their story time, especially when it was adventure authors like Stevenson, Verne, or Tolkien. In fact, their reading had often spurred his interest in math and science. His first two experiments had been calculations and designs to see if he could recreate either Verne's Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea or From the Earth to the Moon. He'd been forced to give up the underwater experiments because the bathtub had definitely not been big enough, and he'd been banned from the recreation center pool all summer after his model submarine shorted out and zinged a couple dozen swimmers. But he'd borrowed library books, learned from his mistakes, and it had been his kindergarten show-and-tell rocket blasting through the classroom ceiling that brought him to the attention of educational authorities.
He hadn't thought about fairy tales, folk tales or tall tales in years. He doubted whether labeling Jo's stories as tall tales or truth would be much of a challenge, even foggy-minded… but it could be fun. Besides, it'd be the perfect excuse to drink in the brunette's beauty to his heart's content. No way could he turn down something that gave him a good reason to stare at the delectable Josefina Lupo. She'd expect him to watch her closely while he listened and decided whether she was trying to fake him out, right? He'd be able to admire her all night without her tasing him for ogling her. This could be fun. "What do I win when I get the right answers?" he smirked with a waggle of his brows.
Jo rolled her eyes at his suggestive tone. "How about I don't tase you?"
He made a face and grinned, "Party pooper." Yet he couldn't help wondering if this version of Lupo would actually turn a taser on him. It wasn't that he didn't think she was capable of it. Whichever Lupo she was, she was the Enforcer, the ultimate officer of the law. But where the previous Lupo had seized every slight reason to tase him or toss him into jail, he believed that this Jo would only do so if and when it was genuinely warranted. Even the time she'd come after him while under the influence of Parrish's RSS device, she'd only restrained him instead of zapping him. Funny, that detail he recalled with perfect clarity – weird funny, not amusing funny, considering he'd been so out of control. Maybe it was another symptom of his current condition? Maybe -
Zane pulled his wandering mind back into focus again. No drifting. Lupo. Taser. But no, that wasn't right: he had no fear about whether she would penalize him if he couldn't guess whether her stories were true or make-believe. She was merely offering a palatable method of verifying his mental state. Lupo was looking after him, though whether out of duty or… something more… he had no way of knowing. It was the 'something more' that he needed to watch out for, stay alert and on his game.
"Yup, party pooper. That's me," she agreed dryly, continuing to watch him as she planned her strategy. Henry, Fargo and Allison had searched Eureka's archives over the last stressful months to see how the occurrences here matched those they'd experienced in their original timeline. Jo could use some of the things they'd discovered to check the accuracy of Zane's memory… and maybe figure out where her relationship with him had gone wrong here. She could mix in some stories from her previous timeline, occurrences they'd not found any record of in this new timeline, and this Zane would think she was making things up to test him. If she did this right, he'd have no idea what he was really telling her… but only if she did it right. One wrongly-chosen phrase or selection of story, and the genius might catch on, loopy or not.
Zane made a show of wriggling around as if getting comfortable, and tugged the blanket closer about his shoulders. "Okay, go ahead. Let's see how good a storyteller you are, JoJo," he smirked, and waited expectantly.
"Alright. I'll give you fair warning that the names have been changed to protect both the guilty and the innocent," she said with a twinkle in her tawny eyes.
"Duly noted," he chuckled, intrigued anew. That didn't sound like she planned to use the kind of stories he'd instantly assumed she would tell him. Tall tales? What did she intend to use if not well-known childhood stories?
"These stories take place in a fictional town named Wahoo," she drawled and, ignoring his snort of laughter, started into her first tale.
Much to Zane's delight, Jo's narrations were based on Eureka-type misadventures. They were widely varied, and proved to be intellectually stimulating as well as entertaining. Moreover, she was amazingly good at not using the real names of her story characters, either the guilty or the innocent, stoically sticking with descriptive monikers for the good guys and the miscreants – really, who else could Sheriff Everyman be than Carter? Zane had little to no trouble associating Eureka citizens' names with the characters, but as amusing as that was, it was far more intriguing to calculate the probable validity of each scenario she presented, based on scientific viability and his familiarity with the town's populace.
Over the next hours he identified as "real" stories about a wife cloned by a spurned and lonely husband ("it's theoretically and technologically viable"), purple flowers that drugged an entire population ("airborne spores are definitely dangerous"), a smart house that kidnapped Wahoo's leading citizens to resolve personal differences that threatened to tear apart the community ("after all, if she can slip Deputy Andy an emo download, she's capable of anything"), a Consortium manipulating scientists to control their discoveries ("I've always said Big Brother was watching"), a disaster-prone young geek who had to be killed to free him when he was trapped in a MACAA - Multi-Application Combat Armor Alternative ("I can definitely see you as the sharpshooter, Lupo"), and a giant magnet that pulled space junk from orbit into the earth's atmosphere ("I was fiddling with an idea like that to clean up all the trash we've left up there!"), a GD lockdown over a false airborne toxin leak, where the geeky guy and the deputy's boyfriend had to hack into GD's security to trick the system into thinking rescuers were dead so they could get past the automated defenses to save trapped people ("yeah, that's entirely possible; every system has a backdoor if you know where to look"), a Tesla school project miscalculation that created a new sun ("Whoa! I can so see that! Some lucky dude must've had a blast countering that!").
He scorned stories about the local sheriff's daughter as a juvenile delinquent ("Miss Goody Two Shoes? No way!"), a missile launched at the moon but knocked off trajectory by Sheriff Everyman ramming the missile launcher with his cruiser ("that's way too implausible to swallow"), a formula that enabled humans to move at super-speed ("a group of real life superheroes; really, Lupo? You expect me to buy that one?"), Wahoo's deputy sheriff falling for a guy who was secretly an android ("with the way you reacted when Deputy Andy had that crush on you? Nope, can't see it."), the possibility of spontaneous combustion ("Fun fodder for those believe-it-or-not shows, but it can't happen."), hijacked behavioral satellite broadcasts that inspired conspiracy theories about crop circles and an alien invasion ("Sounds like a crazy plot for a television episode."), everyone in Wahoo sharing the same dreams ("There are too many variables that would have be in play for something like that to work, and the odds against it are astronomical"), and one scientist secretly cryogenically-freezing another because they both loved the same woman ("way too corny, JoJo"), a time loop on the wedding day of GD's Director and the DOD liaison that ended in the director being dematerialized ("Everyone knows Stark died in a white list project gone wrong, but even a white list project wouldn't mess with time; the protocols are killer!"), a contagion-spreading secret facility uncovered by the machinations of a woman who didn't age, with the crisis averted by the deputy's boyfriend finishing an antidote bomb begun by long-dead scientists ("there's so many variables in that story that it'd be impossible, besides which not even Mansfield could hush up something like that"), the deputy's DNA being stolen by Geeky Guy's wanna-be-girlfriend so she could copy the deputy's appearance to get the geek's attention ("DNA re-sequencing! Possible, but – and no offense here, JoJo – hot as you are, if someone wanted a geek's attention, they'd clone another scientist instead of someone like you").
He dozed off at one point, and then only briefly as far as he could tell since Jo was still talking when he blinked to awareness again, but she was at the resolution of a situation where a signal from space had taken over sleeping teenager's minds. "Wait, go back," he'd urged, since he'd clearly missed the details about how the signal had turned into a decades-old returning GD experiment.
Jo shook her head. "You snooze, you lose, Donovan," she'd drawled, and that was the last time he allowed himself to nod off despite his increasingly heavy limbs and deepening desire for sleep.
Fortunately, she was a good story teller with a droll sense of humor, which was very helpful in holding his attention and helping him fight his exhaustion. She captured the quirks of the characters, making the personalities clear as day, and although she changed names, the pictures she painted of the people in her stories rang true – especially to those in her close circle of friends. She was a little freehanded with the assignment of duties in her Wahoo version of GD, but these people in her stories fit with the ones he'd been getting to know more personally since Founder's Day, the ones that seemed to know him and his skills better than anyone should. Zane was impressed with her ability to insert her friends' characteristics into the stories so well that he could see the players interacting as events unfolded, even when she cast them into different careers.
It hadn't taken long to connect Fargo with Jo's story version of the geeky accident-prone assistant to the ego-maniacal genius who'd been the original Director when Zane first arrived in Eureka. Jo's descriptions of the assistant fit like a glove with the "turning over a new leaf" director that Dr. Fontana had described as apologizing to her over that White List project fiasco on Founder's Day. But Jo's stories implied that Stark had been succeeded by Dr Blake instead of Fargo; the fanciful twist fit into the subplots Jo wove throughout her stories, even though there was no way the General would've appointed a director that had a family that might distract them from making GD the priority in their life. Zane decided he'd have admired and enjoyed developing working relationships, maybe even friendships, with the core group of Wahoo's eccentric inhabitants in Jo's narratives.
He couldn't help being a little jealous of the tight knit group in her stories. He'd longed for exactly that sense of community throughout his life, but it had always eluded him. He might have found it in Wahoo, surrounded by the acceptance, respect, and encouragement of people like Jo's Darth Director, Geeky Guy, the mayor, Mama Doc, and Sheriff Everyman. Zane liked these people in her tales much more than the real people he'd dealt with, and he enjoyed immersing himself in the aura of friendship Jo wove into her stories of them.
Surprisingly, Jo gave him enough technical detail about these crazy scenarios that he found himself fascinated with piecing together the probable science behind each event, mentally racing to ascertain scientific probability before she finished a tale so he could decide whether to accept the anecdote, or whether to write it off as an attempt to fool him. She didn't always use the right technical terms, but she had a good enough grasp of details that he was able to identify the scientific principles involved in each story, which was impressive in and of itself.
Occasionally she slipped in an adventure he remembered, but there were always things she left out or extra details that she added into such narrations. He pointed out these inconsistencies so she'd know he was still on top of his game. For instance, when she retold the story of Zane's arrival in Eureka, she included the whole "do you feel dumb, how can you tell" incident for which he'd been zapped by the duo of lawmen, his tricking her into giving him the information he needed to break out of the jail, Carter tracking him down and hauling him back, and even his reluctantly-provided help to solve the imminent crisis – but she left out the lingerie he'd given her. "Hey," he smirked, "I've always wondered if you kept that lingerie."
He wasn't at all surprised when Jo rolled her eyes and moved on to the next story without answering. Interestingly, a tell-tale blush tinted her olive skin even in the firelight. Hmm… she'd kept them? He filed that thought away for further contemplation at a later date.
Another obvious story was the one about Sheriff Everyman becoming irresistible to Eureka's women; maybe she'd forgotten that Zane was already living in – Wahoo – when that happened, so he knew Jo didn't have a boyfriend at that time and she was making it up about having a steady guy that hadn't liked it that she'd locked lips with her boss. "Of course," he'd added quickly when he saw something akin to pain flicker in her expression, "if you'd had a boyfriend, I'm sure the guy wouldn't have liked it any. No red-blooded guy likes to see his smokin' hot girlfriend kissing some other dude."
The "smokin' hot" part earned him a tiny upturn of her lips, instead of the irritated smack he'd been half-braced to receive. She'd returned to her storytelling without even a reprimand.
Another of her tales involved the biosphere project deep under GD where the first documented case of de-evolution had taken place. He'd cut her off immediately after she sent Sheriff Everyman down into the biosphere. "Come on, Jo, that's no challenge! Everyone knew about that one!" he'd laughed. To prove it when she quirked a brow, he'd elaborated, "Director Stark had me work with him to provide a delivery system for the cure. It wasn't long after you became head of GD Security, and when Stark told you to give me the weapon to modify for the antidote you stood over my shoulder the whole time to make sure I didn't booby-trap your precious gun."
"Right. Good to know you're still on the ball," she'd said. "Moving on…"
Even less of a challenge had been the story about the Arctic ice core sample that infected its caretakers. "Really, Jo; you think I wouldn't remember that? I was cold for weeks afterward!"
She'd shrugged a bit sheepishly, and gone on to her next selection.
And somewhere in the midst of all the other stories, she tossed in, "Okay, how about this one, then: Einstein's archived Bridge Device was activated and created a link through time with the original device operating in 1947. A solar flare interacted with the uplinks of cell phones being used at that instant and sent the handful of users back in time. Fortunately, one of the time travelers was the mayor, and together with Einstein's partner they figured out what happened and how to correct it. While evading the military that thought they were spies, the group was able to use the Camp Wahoo satellite dish to draw enough energy from 1947's solar flares to return to the present. But Einstein's partner, anxious to see the future, hitched a ride and changed the timeline. The Bridge Device was fried and they couldn't fix it, so they lived out their lives in a changed future. Truth or tall tale, Zane?"
"Tall tale," he answered promptly. "Easy one. They didn't even have satellites in orbit back in 1947, let alone a satellite dish powerful enough to channel the power of a solar flare."
Jo kept telling him stories all night long, through the dawn light that filtered down into the fissure and the advent of the brighter beams of sunshine after the sunrise, and right up until three more ropes dropped down the crevice to hang beside Jo's. Almost immediately, three of her black-clad team repelled into the narrow space, and in short order they were hooking Zane into a harness and, working in smooth tandem with the security personnel on the surface, hoisting him up into the fresh morning air.
Before his eyes had adjusted to the bright light, they'd strapped him into a rescue basket and were lowering him down the cliff face he'd scaled yesterday. Per Chief Lupo's orders – apparently issued last night before she'd descended into his crevice – there was a GD medic waiting at the bottom to check his injuries, hook up an IV, and ride back in the chopper with him. Dr. Blake was ready and waiting at GD's main infirmary to check him over as the orderlies moved him from the stretcher to an exam bed in a fully-equipped med bay.
"I know you must be tired; I'll try to be brief so you can get some sleep," she said with a reassuring smile and a pat to his shoulder. And she was true to her word, asking succinct questions and performing an efficient examination with a speed that he was grateful for even in his groggy state. He was pretty sure he'd never appreciated the advanced technology and knowledge of GD as much as he did when Allison used a hand scanner to confirm that there were no cracked skull or bone fragments, no swelling of his brain, nothing to indicate any reason for concern about long-term damage. "Jo, you checked his status throughout the night?"
He turned his head and was surprised to see her leaning against the wall just inside the main door. When had she arrived? He was fairly certain she hadn't ridden down in the chopper. Had he lost track of time? Had he zoned out again without realizing it? She had already changed from the jumpsuit and climbing gear to one of her usual power suits. Gone was his storytelling companion with the stray strands of hair slipping from her ponytail; in her place was the slick and professional Enforcer.
Jo straightened up but didn't step any nearer. "Yeah. He was a little sluggish some of the time, but he was lucid and alert enough to formulate rational scientific theories. He's had plenty of water and a half dozen snack packs of trail mix. You'll want to re-open his leg to clean out any infection, but I don't think there was any serious muscular or arterial damage."
"Good job, Jo," Allison nodded and glanced down at Zane. "Lucky for you that you were found by someone who has so much field experience," she said with a smile.
Well, there was something he'd never considered before. He stared across the room at Lupo again and nodded slowly as he wondered exactly how many other times she'd had to practice field medicine before she'd left the Rangers and come to Eureka. She'd certainly taken good care of him. "Yeah. Lucky."
Stewart, the captain of Jo's second shift security team, marched through the medical lab door with Zane's backpack in hand. He passed it to Jo with a few quiet words. She nodded and dismissed him, then, as the officer left, Jo strolled toward the med bay bed where Zane lay.
She hung his pack off one of the raised side rails. "Stewart's team used your map to place the last two sensors at the coordinates you had marked. Fargo instructed Parrish to monitor the results himself, so your project will be on track when Allison says you can return to work. Your data pad is in there if you want to monitor its progress after you get some sleep." She gestured to the rucksack.
Zane stared up at her, stunned.
"What?" she frowned.
Cautiously he asked, "The Director's not going to give the project to someone else?"
A deeper crease formed between her dark brows. "Allison ruled out any major injuries, Zane. You're not going to be out of commission for long. Why would someone else take over your project?"
As surprised by her question as she'd been by his, he grimaced. "Because that's what happens when I screw up; I get restricted from projects, cuffed, tased, incarcerated, or some combination thereof. You should know; you're usually the one that zaps me." For a second there she looked stricken, before her expression closed off. He frowned.
Allison rested a comforting hand on his shoulder, drawing his attention. "It was just an accident, Zane. It could have happened to anyone. Yes," she gave Jo an admonishing look as the younger woman started to say something, "It was careless to go up there alone." Her calm acknowledgment prompted a grim nod of agreement and a glare down at Zane from Jo before Allison, with a twinkle in her dark eyes, finished, "But while being careless may warrant a scold, it doesn't merit a disciplinary step like taking away your project."
Apparently Jo had no argument with that, either, because she merely nodded when he looked at her for confirmation that he wasn't in trouble this time.
His brow creased; yeah, he had the vague impression that he'd experienced this weird flip from normal to bizarre before. Either he was dreaming this, or the line between fact and fiction was seriously blurred these days. Completely bemused, Zane looked back and forth between the two of them, and then shook his head, muttering "I'm in the Twilight Zone."
The doctor chuckled. "I used to love that show. Great fodder for scientific conjecture. I'm going to have the nurse apply a topical numbing agent to your leg. It'll take effect in three to five minutes, and then we'll open the wound and make certain everything's as it should be. All you need to do is relax. You can even go to sleep; you won't feel a thing during the examination." She smiled gently down at him and patted his shoulder again before she turned away to issue quiet instructions to the nurse standing by.
He looked up at Jo, who was still standing nearby, her arms folded across her chest as she watched the medical personnel organizing his care. It looked like she planned to stay. Odd, but nice.
Worn out by the combination of his injuries and lack of sleep, and reassured both by Dr. Blake's comforting presence and the knowledge that Jo was still looking out for him, Zane relaxed and drifted off before they'd even assembled the surgical tools.