Summary: I don't know how I didn't put the two together. How could I have not? When our eyes met, I automatically knew it was him. So what did I do? I ran, same as I did five years ago.

Disclaimer: I don't own Gakuen Alice.

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Different Now: Chapter Two

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Anna and Nonoko were upset that Hotaru and I left early. They kept going on about how it must have been fate that the Crimson Flame held Natsume in the band. For a good half an hour, they tried to get me to go back inside too, saying that since we had VIP passes we could still go backstage and meet the band. But I already knew all of them. Drums, Kokoro Yome. Keyboard, Kistune Yome. Bassist, Youichi Hiriji. Guitarist, Ruka Nogi. And singer, Natsume Hyuuga. I even knew who was managing the band, Yuu Tobita.

But when I knew them, they weren't Crimson Flame, one of the most popular bands in the country – maybe the world, what did I know anymore? - they were just a small town, local high school and then college band. Back then they went by many names, always changing it every time they thought of something cooler. Crimson Flame had been the one band name I picked out..

Back at our apartment, I sulked in my room, door locked. Anna and Nonoko apologized for bringing me along. Apparently, they knew who was preforming and decided to try and play match maker with my ex-boyfriend and I. But I also knew that they had their own reasons for going. Anna had a crush on Yuu, or Iinchou as we called him through high school, since freshman year when we all met up. The same was with Nonoko and Kistune, or Kitsu. No one really knows why they never dated.. but I'm glad that they never had to have their heart broken like I did.. even if it was my own fault.

I sat in my room, trying to write. I couldn't concentrate. So I tried to read a book. I couldn't keep focus on any of the words. So I put up all the pens, the paper, and the books and laid down on my bed. I rest my head on my pillow and grabbed my remote. Turning on the television, I sighed. It was really late, almost two-thirty in the morning now. Nothing would be on, but I still flipped from channel to channel, looking for something to distract me.

I stopped on the news channel when I heard those two words; Crimson Flame. They were all over the news. Their picture of all six of them, including Yuu, was all over the place. When the news channel started to play his music, I couldn't take it anymore. I shut the television off quickly, tossed the remote to the end of my bed, and hopped out of bed. I slipped my feet into a pair of flip flops, grabbed my jacket, and headed out for some fresh air, not caring that I was only in my pajamas shorts and a tank top.

The fresh air did me some good. I was able to clear my head and for the first time that day and not think about.. him. I found myself at the playground only a couple minute walk from my apartment complex. In the day time, it was crowded and packed full of screaming kids. Now, completely quiet and empty, it reminded me of the old days. My college years. Back when Natsume and I-

And the air didn't help. Everything reminded me of him now.

I sat down on a swing and sighed, kicking the dirt beneath me. This playground reminded me of the one by our old college where we used to hang out all the time. Natsume used to call me childish for sneaking out late with him and bringing him to a playground of all places. I found it calm, collecting, and cute. I used to sit with him on the swings holding hands or sit in the tubes and just lay together or lie on the grass and stare up at the stars.

My eyes wondered up, gazing at the brightened sky. Tokyo's sky was hard to see the stars at night with all the florescent lights on at all times and such, but I could just picture the night sky back at college. I missed that place so much. It held most of the precious memories. I missed all of my friends, though I did move in with three of them; here were still lots I didn't talk to anymore.

Like those six for example.

I spent most of my childhood and my life with Hotaru, Natsume, and Ruka. Not having Natsume and Ruka in my life was..upsetting. It was depressing. I was depressed without them in my life. They were more than half of my life. I truly, deeply missed them, but what could I do? I gave them up a long time ago.

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I had never done something like that on stage before. I almost lost it – almost lost myself. I almost jumped off the stage and followed her, afraid to lose her again. And I did lose her. How could I let her slip through my fingers like that? She was right there. Right in front of me. Close enough that I could have grabbed on and never let go. Not this time.

Seeing Mikan in the front row of my concert, well, I didn't expect it. And judging by the look in her eyes, she hadn't been expecting me either. Then Hotaru had to but in and drag Mikan away. The first time I see her in five years, and there is nothing I can do. I can't run after her and tell her how much I have missed her. Or how I still think about her every single day. Or that she never left my mind.

I couldn't even talk to her. I didn't get a chance to. Not even to say hello.

I don't think anyone else in the band seemed to notice the girls in the front row; I saw Anna and Nonoko there as well. If Ruka had seen Hotaru, he sure was good at hiding it. The two of them dated back in high school until the third year of college. Last year of college they stayed just friends, but it was always awkward for Ruka, never for Hotaru. Though nothing was ever awkward for Hotaru. And Mikan and I started dating summer before our junior year in high school and we broke up the last year of college.

Well, she broke up with me.

I still remember that day like it was yesterday. It was in fact, and still is, the worst day of my life.

A week prior to that day, the band was offered a big touring opportunity. We were ready to turn it down, not wanting to leave everyone behind, but out friends, the girls, convinced us to go. So we signed the contract. But I was ready to leave the band for Mikan. I was going to be with her no matter what it took.

Then she told me she didn't love me anymore.

At first, I thought she was lying just to get my to go and not turn down this chance, but she was serious. I had never seen Mikan so serious before in my life. She told me that she was planning on breaking up with me anyways, and that it wouldn't be fair to wait till after I turned down the tour to tell me.

So the six of us packed up and left. For the first year or so Koko, Kitsu, and Yuu kept in touch with Anna and Nonoko, and Youichi did his best to keep in touch with Hotaru, my cousin, and Mikan, his cousin. But everyone eventually lost contact. We were always busy, never having time for phone calls anymore or to write back letters, and it seemed they got tired of waiting.

And one day the letters and phone calls just stopped. It was as if they didn't exist anymore.

I wish we'd kept in contact, but after college ended, nothing was the same. It seemed like everything had changed. We went from playmates in elementary school to friends in middle school to best friends in high school and for some, even lovers in college. So how do you just drop someone who's been in almost your entire life?

I myself had never been that close with Anna or Nonoko, but they had been in Koko, Kitsu, and Yuu's life since elementary school like that of Mikan, Hotaru, Ruka's and mine. Then we all met in high school and became one of the best group of friends you could ask for.

And sadly, the best eight years of my life slipped away in just a week.