Disclaimer. I do not, nor will I likely ever, own Naruto, Naruto Shippuden, or that other third thing that shall not be mentioned. I do however own Tsukimi's immortal ass as well as any non-cannon techniques and or people I choose to add at my leisure, for here in this real I am god.

Now without any further delay lets get right into the thick of it shall we?

Konoha General- Tsukimi

So. That sucked. A lot. Honestly, I'm surprised I'm as alert as I am right now. Considering what just happened I have every right to be a hysterical mess, yet. . .

I feel fine.

Just after they began attacking me I had noticed the pain wasn't nearly as bad as It should have been. Id been cut by knives before, but the four that had pinned me to the floor had barely hurt at all. At first I had been seriously confused, I knew from the show that I should have increased healing because I was an Uzumaki, but those. . . people had cut limbs off at least a few times and they popped right back on.

But then I remembered my "perk".

I had Hidans healing ability, my body would never die unless it was completely erased, as far as I was concerned anyway. But my Uzumaki genes seemed to have amplified this, allowing me to not only heal completely, also much FASTER than the heretic priest of jashin.

The fact that having my organs getting exposed made me start laughing MAY have been cause for concern, but with the hole reincarnation, inhumane treatment, and just EVERYTHING that had happened. . .

I didn't really care.

What I did care about was the fact that my brother was not here, and the blond woman currently strangling me in a bear hug and crying hysterically while a man who was undoubtably the third hokage sat in a chair next to her sporting a fist shaped bruise on his face. It took a few minutes for her to calm down, and when she did I was surprised to see one of the sannin in my hospital room. After she stopped using me as a hugging post, the two adults seemed to pick up on my confusion, and we began to talk. Well, they talked, I just nodded. The first thing they did was ask if the hokage could stay. It took a second but I realized they thought I might be uncomfortable around men. I honestly didn't give a shit, but had a feeling voicing those exact words might be unwise.

For about 20 minutes Tsunade went over a checklist. Did I feel pain, did I remember what happened, how did this or that make me feel, ect. It turns out the only immediately concerning effect was I I got extremely defensive about being naked. I didn't seem to have developed a problem with men, but I wouldn't be hitting up the hot springs any time soon. After making sure I wouldn't have a breakdown on them the hokage began to explain what had been going on for the last few years. Me and Naruto had been placed in the orphanage the day after our birth and were to be monitored by a member of the council, who helped the him, the village leader, make big discussions. He took time to explain everything he was saying, and talked really slow. For all intents and purposes, they believed I was a scared, broken little girl who taught herself how to talk. I had no intention of ever revealing the whole "from another dimension" bit, so I had to make it look like I was learning most of this for the first time. And let me tell you, lying to the leader of a village of people whose PROFESSION is lying? In any other situation I'm sure I'd have been found out already. Anyway, the council man had spent 5 years turning in fake reports on our wellbeing as well as paying off the two ninja who were supposed to be watching over us so that they basically ignored us entirely. It was at this point that a strange look crossed the old mans face. "tell me, is it true that you don't know your name?"

His question was kinda out of left field, but after a moment it dawned on me. 5 years id been here. 5 years id been so focused on keeping Naruto alive that I somehow, in classic airhead fashion, forgot that I didn't have a name. honestly, I was a bit of an idiot in my last life but this was getting ridicules. But then something else occurred, did they not find it strange that I didn't know my name, but Naruto knew his? Id just have to hope they didn't ask. As to his question, I simply nodded that I in fact did not know my name, which is when I herd it for the first time.

Tsukimi. It was a nice name, I mean I spoke English so I had no clue what that name MEANT. But it sounded nice. What was the deal with that? We all spoke English but we wrote in kanji and had Japanese names. Fricking DUB logic. I'm just gonna assume I'm in a "DUB" version of the Naruto universe and leave it at that.

Anyway, after letting me know my name (and thankfully NOT thinking to ask how Naruto knew his own) the conversation moved on to explaining what would happen now. Since I was physically fine and seemed to be coping with the incident me and Naruto would be moving into an apartment for the foreseeable future. We would have daily check ins with a member of the hokages personal guard, as well as monthly check ins from the man himself. We would be fed, and have actual beds to sleep in, and overall would be taken care of. I was also shocked when Tsunade proclaimed she would also check in with us, as she had decided to 'hang around'. Now to an actual child with no knowledge of the world this dident really mean anything, but to me, and the old man for that matter, this was shocking news.

Apparently, Tsunade had returned to the village for just one day, in order to pay her respects to the friends she had lost in the nine tales attack. (this information was followed by a ten-minute-long explanation about what the nine tails was, as well as what chakra was). After the incident with me though, and seeing how bad we were treated, Tsunade had decided to stay in the village and keep an eye on us.

Kishimoto, your plot is officially dead. I killed it without even trying.

I will not apologies.

After that, we went over what school was, they told me that Naruto and I would be brought to a store (they also explained what that was, I would stop them but it was kind of amusing) and we would start in two weeks. Then they explained what a week was. I laughed internally, The floor laughed, I immediately became afraid for my mental health, it was great.

Then Naruto burst into the room along with a horde of dogs and jumped onto my bed bawling his eyes out. After getting crushed by a naru hug, and swarmed by all the dogs for another ten or so minutes(which Naruto referred to as "little fluffys", I had finally had enough sitting around. Id spent my last life as a shut in, and this life locked in a closet.

"can we go outside?"

It was the first thing I had said out loud since waking up, and everyone seemed surprised by the sudden request, but Kakashi, whom I recognized the moment I saw him in the door way, proceeded to fulfill my request. How did he do this? By letting me get up on my own? No.

The fucker threw me and my brother over his shoulder and jumped out the window.

*sharp inhale* oh Kakashi. You wonderful man-child. Your officially now my second favorite.

Crap. . .

I forgot to punch the old man. Oh well. Looks like Tsunade did it for me anyway.

After taking us outside the white haired jonin made a b-line for a training ground. It was mostly woodsy with a small open space in the middle. The man sat us both down, his masked face betraying no emotion. "alright listen up. My name is Kakashi and I will be watching you two until they get your house ready. Since this is your first time outside How about we play a game together?"

I was honestly not expecting him to be so forward. In the show he had been really awkward with kids, so it was surprised he willingly suggested playing games-

The man held up two leaf's in his hand gesturing for us to take them. "this is a leaf, for this game you two are going to try sticking it to your forehead. Don't worry, ill walk you through it."

. . .ok so maybe not a "game" game, but I probably looked like a kid on Christmas. Id wanted to try using Chakra ever since I was conscious of my surroundings, but I had been afraid of doing something wrong and getting hurt or worse, hurting Naruto.

After taking a leaf, Kakashi wad begun explaining what chakra was, and how to call on it. Naruto took a few minutes to feel out the energy, but I got it instantly. The downside of being hypersensitive to chakra was that too much of it in one place could give me a serious headache, the upside however, was near perfect chakra control. Kakashi's one visible eyebrow raised in mild surprise as I not only felt out my chakra, but successfully stuck the leaf to my head after only two minutes. Naruto, not to be outdone, only took another three to get it down, though both of us couldn't hold the leaf very long before we lost focus.

"that was good you two." The ninja spoke up. "most people take more time to start out, so now you just need to work on keeping it stuck. You did especially well Tsukimi-chan!"

That's when a look of confusion crossed Naruto features, and he spoke up. "wha? Whos Tsukmi?"

Oh yay. He dident know my name. a brief explanation, as well as convincing him that my name was NOT in fact "sis" solved this problem, but then he decided to cause another one.

"Hey sis, if you diden know ya name, whyd ya know mine?"

Damn, adorable little brat just put me on the chopping block. I could hear the gears turning in Kakashi's head as he too noticed the discrepancy, I had to think of an excuse fast because I REALY wasn't in the mood for the reincarnation from another world talk. Now or ever. "just tell him you herd someone at the orphanage say it once."

I nearly had a heart attack and the tree I was leaning on lent me a suggestion on what to do next. Chalking it up to the fact that my brain had a kuni threw it a few hours ago and I was going insane, I decided to take the trees advice and told Kakashi exactly that.

The part about hearing the matron says his name, not the talking tree.

I think ill just keep that to myself.

After that the next few hours had consisted of me and Naruto progressively adding more leaves to more points on our bodys. Supposedly, the average academy student could have a leaf on there forehead, one on their nose, and one between their shoulder blades, as well as one on the back and palm of each hand. The average child took about two to three days to accomplish this, and while Naruto was still overcharging his chakra and working on getting the two on his face to stay, I had managed to move on to the final one. Between the shoulder blades. That's when things got. . . interesting.

You see me and Naruto are Uzumaki, and the Uzumaki clan was infamous for having more than one Bloodline limit. Every member of the clan had vast chakra and advanced healing, a handful could heal others if the injured person bit down hard enough to draw blood.

But then there were chakra chains.

The Uzumaki chakra chains always manifested differently in every member that had access to them. Uzumaki Kushina's chains were massive and came out of her belly, possessing the power to nullify chakra, allowing her to hold down a tailed beast.

Mine erupted out from between my shoulder blades. And they were VERY different from a normal Uzumakis.

You remember how my "black sage" power fused to my healing and mad it faster? Well apparently it had also affected my chains, because although they were initially purple and made of chakra, a layer of SKIN immediately grew around the four, turning them into a strange single tail like appendage.

It felt so WEIRD!

I could actually feel and move it, thrashing around behind me like it had a mind of its own. The damn thing was a little less than twice my Hight in length, and when I tried to move it deliberately, it split back into four. Now Naruto was looking on in wonder at "Sis's cool new trick" while Kakashi looked on in mild horror at the fact that i had just sprouted tentacles. Though that's not the right word for them. They each had "fur" or in this case really short hair covering them, with plates of bone covering the top half like armor. They also ended in a tip made out to bone. For a moment I was absolutely horrified that I would be stuck with these, but at Kakashi's behest I canceled the chakra flow and thankfully the skin and bone turned to dust as the chakra chains retreated.

Needless to say, I was not allowed to focus chakra in that area until further notice, lest I become a biological Doctor octopus again. thankfully I was still in my hospital gown, so my clothes didn't get torn off…

Ok my new problem with being naked MAY have been rather Sirius. But considering what happened I'm just glad that's the only major issue I developed. That and the floor laughing and the tree talking but that's not important.

Anyhow, after Naruto spent a little while longer developing his skill at leaf balancing, only blowing up 20 more leaves with too much chakra before finally being able to balance all 7 leaves for 5 minutes. After that, whether he got a message or had been keeping track of time I'm not sure, but Kakashi once again tossed us over his shoulders and declared it was time to brake in our new home.

He talked it up real nice, but since I had watched Naruto, I knew what to expect.

Shity apartment here we come.

Hokage Tower

Currently the Hiruzen Sarutobi sat across from his old student a cup of sake for each of them sat on the table next to the bottle that the old monkey had been saving specifically for her return.

*tap tap tap*

"Hime."

*tap tap tap*

"you noticed it too dident you?"

*tap tap tap*

"Tsunade?"

*sigh* "how could I miss it? With the hell she went through that girl should be a trembling mess, but the only outward sign of discomfort was at nudity, and that's not that bad. The girls to at ease, and her healing is far more than any Uzumaki I've ever seen. I dare say from what the Uchiha boy described her healing is even faster than mine with my seal released. It's just not natural."

The old man nodded at this, as it was exactly what he was thinking. "Tsunade. I know they are your godchildren, and I would never say this lightly, but we need to consider the facts here.

The busty woman sighed again, knowing exactly what her old teacher was alluding to. "Kushina was only pregnant with one child. Tsukimi, you really think that she is-"

"I know it's a long shot." He spoke up again, throwing the sake down his gullet before continuing. "it is not a high possibility, but with the intellect she possesses even though she was never properly taught, her inhuman healing, the way she just seemed to not even care about the fact that she was raped. And finally, her apparent LAUGHTER during her attack we need to consider the real possibility that she is in fact-"

"the Kubi"

To their credit, the two seated didn't even jump when their comrade made his presence know from the window. The white hared man mad his way into the room, seating himself next to his old teammate.

"jiriya."

"Hime."

The two exchanged a nod as their old teacher brought out a third glass for his newly arrived other student. "jiriya I'm afraid that the case is exactly that. Its unlikely, but it is possible that its consciousness is somehow inhabiting the body we know as Tsukimi."

The man assessed his old teacher and teammate, having not seen the former in months, and the later in years. "it would explain her extra spiritual chakra. And if it turns out she is, what will you do?"

"For now nothing."

They all downed a glass of the top shelf alcohol together, before the elder continued. "even if its true, she seems to hold Naruto dearly, so I'm content to let them stay together, however, if she proves to be a threat, or manipulating him, we will have no choice."

All three of their expressions darkened as one morbid thought passed threw all of their minds.

But it was a fourth voice that spoke that thought from the doorway, from the lips of one who had been listening in since the beginning.

"You mean to eliminate her then?"

"if it should come to that than I see no other way. *sigh* but lets not only dwell on such morbid topic, it's been to long since we were all together-"

"Orochimaru-kun."

The Twins Apartment

I Called it.

The apartment that Kakashi showed us to was indeed the one from the show, although it had yet to be left to waste away by a clueless Naruto, something I would NOT be allowing. As it had been a rather long day the scarecrow decided to keep the tour simple. One bedroom, kitchen, living room, walk in closet. All in all, it was actually a fairly nice apartment. We, and of course by that I mean I, would need to make sure it STAYED nice.

After the tour it was already night time and I could not WAIT for a nice long nap. Tomorrow would be a busy day, shopping for school, getting clothes, as well as stalking up on food. Come to think of it we probably need a jonin to come with us, I'd rather not have those assholes chase me.

"oy, sis?" Naruto broke me out of my musings, Kakashi had since left the apartment and the two of us were laying down on the two futons laid out for us on the bedroom floor. "ya kid?" I responded with my nickname for him, he always wondered why I called him that but ill never tell. "is everyting really gonna get better now?"

I merely chuckled at that. He may be too young to understand, but I could tell that he was really just asking if I was ok. He had this way of asking personal questions indirectly. Don't ask me how it developed, cause I'm the only one he talks too and I certainly didn't teach him that. . .

I really hope I haven't accidently killed the talk no jutsu. . .

"You know what naru? I think were both going to be just fine." I reached over and ruffled his hair for good measure. With that he finally seemed to relax. I was about to fall asleep myself when the universe decided that I had MORE shit to deal with.

By shit, I mean what I'm guessing is my "Mind Scape". The moment my head hit the pillow I found myself in what looked like a crappy remake of my old home town. I say crappy, because there was not a single square inch of grass or trees to bee seen, jus buildings and roads. And the buildings were all so tall I couldn't see over them, making the whole thing into a massive maze. Luckily, I didn't have to traverse said maze though, because I was evidently already where I needed to be.

Judging by the voices booming out from nowhere

"WELCOM MORTAL! TO THE BIRTH AND DEATH OF YOUR VERY EXISTANCE!"

Now as far as I knew I did not have any tailed beasts inside me, and if this really was my mindscape, which I'm assuming it is and not some lucid dream, I could only really think of one thing to say to the scary sky voice. "Jashin, is that you?" this time a slightly different voice spoke up, only it was not nearly as intimidating.

"COCKA-DOODLE-DO THE COW SAYS MOOOO! PIZZA TIME!"

…

"sorry about her shes a dumbass, and no I'm not jashin that hidan guy is just a wack job"

I dident really know what to say to that, so I chose instead to just wait for the voice to continue.

"ehem. Anyway I should introduce myself, rather I should explain what I am."

My foot started tapping as I waited for this voice to get to the point, I had very important sleep to get back to and my possible insanity did not change that!

"so essentially when you died in the real world, I broke off from your base personality and sort of became my own being. Minus a body of course."

My head tilted to the side as I processed that information. "so, you're basically a split personality? Are you different from me or are we basically the same person split two ways?"

"ok so you know how you haven't been feeling pain normally? Basically, whenever you get hurt I feel it instead of you. So I'm your pain given its own mind I guess?"

. . ."that doesn't make any sense."

"IT WILL IF YOU JUST BELIVE MR. KRABS!"

"ok 'pain' voice, who's the other one?"

"ok so you know how I was created by your painful death? I keep you from feeling pain and from being afraid of water, since you, ya know, drowned. The other voice was created from a… DIFFERENT traumatic experience to help you avoid serious emotional damage."

…"Are you telling me that that other personality is-"

"The rape voice yes yes she is."

"That explains why I'm not freaking out, well about THAT anyway. The whole multi personality disorder thing is kindda bummin me out."

"WAFFLES!"

"Hey look on the bright side, you can use your op healing without worrying about building up a pain tolerance, AND you might actually be able to have a relationship in the future since the crazy one took on all your emotional baggage!"

"than why am I afraid of being naked?"

"Haven't you ALWAYS had a weird thing about that?"

…"oh ya. I forgot."

"Those damn umppa lumppas wouldn't let me in the chocolate factory, and now I'm wanted for arson in thirteen states!"

"wtf?"

"wtf?"

"BUBBLES!"

". . .anyway I just wanted to let you know we were here. We can talk to you while your awake too, and we can also access your sensing ability to help you out if your not focusing in a situation!"

"*gasp* IM YOUR SPIDY SENCES!"

And after that… riveting conversation, my mindscape faded away and I fell into a deep blissful sleep till morning.

The next morning was thankfully uneventful. Naruto slept well into the afternoon, this probably being the most comfortable thing he's ever slept on I decided to have another look around the house, but unfortunately it held no fun secrets for me to explore. How boring. According to the dingy clock angina up in the living room, it was about 1 pm when our escort for the day finally arrived. Naruto was ecstatic to be able to safely explore the village.

I nearly shat myself the second the door opened.

I felt the chakra before it even got near the apartment. It felt WRONG in a way, like that weird feeling when you try to pick something up but it keeps slipping out of your hands, like an eel or maybe a. . .

*knock knock knock* "Ku ku ku you must be little Naruto kun!"

One second I was sitting on the couch that had been provided for our living room, the next thing I knew my Chakra chains were out and I was standing in front of my brother staring down a man who could easily tear me in half. The snake pedo was not only in the village, but he had somehow walked right passed the anbu detail the hokage had protecting the house! I know hes good at hiding how the hell had he gotten so far in broad daylight?

To his credit, the snake sannin dident seem at all surprised by my weird back-tail thing, nor did he seem surprised by my defensive actions. "Tsuki-chan, please don't be afraid, the hokage sent me to escort you and your brother, you remember the old man yes? Why don't you just calm down ok?"

"Tsuki , remember this is a branch universe from original Naruto, its entirely possible he's isn't a traitor, or at least not yet anyway."

"his chakra smells funny, don't get in his van Tsuki-chan!"

That's not gonna stop any time soon.. great.

Deciding to go against my better judgment I stopped the chakra flow to my pseudo tail and allowed Orochimaru to enter our home. After a few minutes he had introduced himself and pulled out some boxed lunches for us to eat. I thought it was decent, nothing special but definitely better than the literal table scraps id been eating for the last few years.

Naruto took one bite and proceeded to completely devour the entire meal in seconds.

I think I know where our monthly allowance is going from now on, and it smells like ramen.

Naru was looking at the snake like god had just descended from heaven, I was praying to whatever ACTUAL gods might be out there that he forgot about the pale man so that I didn't have to worry about him coming home one day with two heads or something. After getting reprimanded for using my 'tail' without permission, our strange party of three headed straight for the shopping sector of the village. When he asked the two of us what we would like to do first I immediately demanded to check out a clothing store. He didn't need to ask why, as Naruto was currently wearing his old rags, and I was still in a hospital gown.

If we hadn't been getting weird looks because of who we were, we were definitely getting them for our current appearance. I looked like I just escaped a mental hospital and my brother looked like he was an escaped slave. Orochimaru, even if he wasn't yet a traitor, still looked like he played castle crashers with little boys.

It took a little over an hour but Naru and I had thoroughly collected enough clothes to keep us warm and comfortable till we hit our next growth spurt. Orochimaru even made sure we got our clothes a little bigger than necessary so we wouldn't grow out of them to quickly. I still had no idea if I could trust this version of him or not, I did not have enough information to tell weather he would still betray the village or not, but for now I'd give him the benefit of the doubt. All of the shirts I got where mostly just simple long-sleeved shirts, 5 purple ones and one blue one with a Konoha leaf on the back. I had also gotten mostly sweat pants, as the only real alternative this store had for young girls were tight style jeans and skirts that were too short for my taste. I didn't know why they dont have anything longer, but I suppose this IS the land of fire so most of the clothing options are meant for warm weather. Naruto, gods bless him, had attempted to purchase his unholy orange "kill me" outfit. When I told him to return it, not only could we not find where it came from, but according to the store owner they did not even sell that style of clothing, much less the color.

Orochimaru had promptly burnt it to a crisp while I convinced my brother to such for something less…

Hideous.

At the end of our visit I had gotten a pair of children's sandals along with my outfit, and Naruto had purchased some shorts, a handful of assorted tshirts, and after some BEGGING(as well as a utilization of puppy eyes jutsu) he had purchased a orange jacket. Thankfully this one was less kill me and more simple eye sore, but if he liked it I wouldn't complain.

I swear the kubi made him where that color or something.

After paying for everything and changing into some of the new clothes the snake sannin led us over to a store that sold supplies for the ninja academy. Though, the word store dident do the place justice. The place was easily the size of a shopping mall, and apparently it also had fairly tight security. In order to even enter the place you had to be entered into the academy. After entering they had basic school supply's as well as kunai and shrunken that weren't sharp but were weighted to be accurate for throwing practice. The next levels of the building were inaccessible to us though, as you needed to be in second year to get into it. Apparently after that were sections specifically geared to what you would need for each year of the academy, while the last section was actually the Konoha genin library which was home to books and scrolls on genjutsu, taijutsu, and ninjutsu from the E ranked clone jutsu to the B ranked earth style: mud wall. Anything above that though was located in the Konoha shinobi library, which was far more secure and possessed every justsu in Konoha that wasn't a clan secret or a forbidden technique. (of course any ninja worth their salt never even wrote their original jutsu down so there were still probably thousands of unrecorded jutsu and fighting styles that couldn't be learned at that library either.)

We purchased nothing worth mentioning. Since we were just starting (and had received literally no education prior) we only needed the practice throwing weapons and normal school basics. I have to say, having one of the worlds most dangerous ninja hissing at anyone who so much as looked at us wrong was a good deterrent from the assholes who thought Naruto was the nine tails and that I was his slave or whatever. In fact, nothing of note occurred during the trip other than who we passed on our way out. Even without the green horror that his sensei would eventually give him Rock Lee could be recognized easily by his massive eyebrows.

The rest of our day with old pale white and slithery was spent with him trying to explain what kind of food we should be getting for our meals every week while Naruto tried and failed to remember his words and I listened, but made it look like I was ignoring him just to piss him off.

Once shopping was officially done it had already gotten pretty late in the day, and the snake decided to take us out to dinner before taking us home. (it should also be noted that he was carrying all our things in a storage scroll. I should definitely see if I had any talent for fuinjutsu.) needless to say after catching sight of the legendary noodle stand in the corner of my eye I was dragging both Naruto and Orochimaru along by the hands. After we were seated the old man behind the counter, who introduced himself as Teuchi while 'humbly' welcoming the sannin to his shop. I was also extremely grateful that he greeted me and Naru with no less joy in his expression. He than asked us if we knew what we would like to order, and that's when I made a rather big mistake. 5 years in this new world. 2 of those years capable of coherent thought. 2 years teaching my brother how to speak, making absolutely sure only to use the basics, so that my excuse of "learning by listening" was at least slightly believable. But it had been a stressful week even with my apparent separate personality's handling most of the 'damage' and in a moment of weakness I had basically sent MYSELF to Ibiki's chamber of fun.

"Naru you should try miso!" I don't know what possessed me, maybe it was the mental fatigue, maby it was because I was trying to cheer him up from the funk he'd been in since my… accident. But either way I knew the second I uttered the words that I was doomed.

Orochimaru, to his credit, didn't miss a beat telling Teuchi to bring us three orders of that same ramen. But I could FEEL his gaze watching my every movment.

Theres no situation where I could have possibly learned what 'miso ramen' was. And even if I HAD herd of it within the last day, somebody who had been locked in a room for all five years of their short life would have no way of knowing what ramen looked like, so I shouldn't have known this was a ramen shop. But he didn't point that out.

His silence terrified me.

The ramen was delicious, I don't know how Naru fit 5 full bowls into his malnourished stomach, but he did. It was so good I almost forgot my terror, but sadly even my twin physic brakes couldn't protect me from how royally I had fucked up.

The walk home was spent by the snake telling Naruto and me how much fun we were going to have once the academy started, as well as telling us that "the nice man" Kakashi was going to come by our house every day till the academy started up to help catch us up to date on our basic knowledge as much as he could.

His eye never left me the entire walk.

After unpacking back at home the snake left us, but I had no doubt I wouldn't be sleeping easy. What did the man suspect? That I was a spy? No there was no opportunity for somebody to train me or any of that crap. but what else was there? I wasn't the Jinchuriki so it's not like I was being influenced by the-

Oh! That could work!

I'm still not sure what theories the sannin, and no doubt by now the hokage, had on my impossible knowledge, but what if I could actually create a believable excuse?

"its risky Tsuki, but it could work. No. it has to, otherwise were getting mind walked and then it's all fucked."

"Mashed potatoes dull the taste of burning flesh! Tehe"

It was settled, tonight after Naruto was asleep, I would get help from the only person I knew could be trusted with knowledge of the future, even if mine was seemingly useless at the moment.

Tonight, I would meet big orange and fluffy.

Naruto and I both brushed our teeth like we had been shown, and proceeded to change into the PJ's we had purchased along with our other clothes. We both lay down in our futons, Naru clearly exhausted after what was essentially the second biggest day of his life. But before he closed his eyes to sleep, he decided to speak to me again. "Sis? Do you not like mr. oc-ochi-ochiru? You were looking at em funny awl day."

Oh. Moral moment. Do I try and convince my brother to stay away from the pale man because of my knowledge of a version of him from a different universe? In the end, I didn't have the heart to try and make the lovable ball of energy hate someone. I also didn't think he would understand if I did try.

"na, im just tired kiddo. Sorry if I made ya worry."

"Sis?" he spoke as I tuned out the light turning tword him as darkness engulfed us.

"Ya?"

"were gonna be awesome ninja, aren't we?"

"ya."

"I jus got a question."

"What is it Naru?"

"wats a ninja?"

*snicker* "ill tell you in the morning little brother."

I waited for about an hour before enacting my plan.

It was a simple idea really, I'd reach out to the small amount of nine tails chakra I could feel leaking into Narutos system, and then me and my two extra personalities would basically beg the fox to drag us into the seal until he responded or until we gave up. I thought it might not work, or that it would take a long time to achieve my goal.

I was not expecting to black out the instant my chakra made contact.

The next thing I knew, I was no longer in bed next to my brother, but in a two-inch puddle of water that engulfed the entire floor of the massive sewer like structure I found myself in. and there, pressing against the massive cage with a tag reading 'seal' in the middle of it, was…

"FUCKING FINALY! IVE BEEN TRYING TO TALK TO YOU FOR FIVE FUCKING YEAR DID YOU SERIOUSLY NEVER THING TO TRY THIS BEFORE NOW?!"

A very irate, very massive, and very FEMALE sounding nine tailed fox.

Balls.

Fufufu. I have to admit, besides its rather morbid start I'm really enjoying this story. I hope you also enjoyed reading it, cause ethers definitely more where this came from. And don't worry, I will be moving along to the later academy years next, as well as getting to the genin arc within the next few chapters, so that I wont just be dawdling in the childhood years too long.

As for the next chapter, I hope you like fuzzy, cause there's gonna be a lot of it, and its going to be orange. And following that? We can move along to my personal spin on the emo genocide!

In the future I will be leaving little votes after certain chapters to get your opinions on certain aspects of the story I haven't decided on.

Since this story isn't really big at the moment I'm not expecting a lot, but if you enjoy and have the time please feel free to participate in the votes or to just leave your general thoughts and comments.

This vote will be here until I get to the point in the story where its relevant, so there's plenty of time to act on it till then.

Hiruzen: dead or alive?

With that I bid you all a pleasant day!