Disclaimer: Stephenie Myers owns Twilight and all the characters. But stripper Edward is mine.

Thank you to tawelephant for being my beta on this chapter! You rock baby mama!

Please read and review!!

My Life as a Male Stripper

Chapter 1: We're going where?

Bella's POV

Sitting in my office is the bane of my existence. Don't get me wrong, I love my job and the people I work for. It's just sometimes I get bored, and I know I should take the time to work on my own writing, but just can't seem to do it here in the office.

I am an editor for a small publishing house in Seattle. We are certainly not a Little Brown and Company kind of place or Random House for that matter. Just a small mom and pop enterprise owned by just that, a mom and pop.

Mr. and Mrs. Hale had started this company before one of my closest friends, Rosalie was ever born. They were both writers, both wanting to get their works published, and just like every other writer, discovered how hard it was to get a publishing company to look at your work. Besides that, the idea of someone else editing their work to suit the publisher's needs, didn't sit well with them. They believed that your work should stand on its own and the only editing that should be done was grammatical errors.

With a small investment and some friends in the business willing to help them, they started what is now known as a well respected publishing house. They have published all of their own books, and many other books by writers whom the big publishing houses wouldn't give the time of day to. The fact that these big publishing houses turned down what they thought as nobody's, has been their loss and Hale Publishing's gain.

Rosalie and I grew up together, along with our other best friend, Alice. The three of us grew up in the same neighborhood, attending the same elementary, middle, and high school together. The only exception was college. Rosalie and I attended the University of Washington at Seattle together, while Alice went off to fashion school. That is where she met Angela. Angela was attending business school, but they somehow ended up in the same sorority house together. And when Alice came home, Angela followed. So now there is four of us that are basically like the Three Musketeers plus one. Kind of like that movie where there were three of them and the fourth came along and joined right in.

Because of my friendship with Rosalie, that is how I ended up in the profession that I am now. Mr. and Mrs. Hale and I would discuss literature to no end, driving Rosalie up the wall. When I turned sixteen, I started working part time in the publishing house for them doing whatever they asked me to. At eighteen, I became a part time proof reader working there the entire time I was in college.

Rosalie despised the written word. If it wasn't on a menu or in a fashion magazine, she wouldn't look at it. It was a wonder that she did as well as she did in school. She graduated in the top ten of our class in high school and in the top ten percent of her graduating class in college. Rosalie was interested in advertising, and so she steered as far away as she could from anything that had to do with English.

I, on the other hand, loved to read. It was nothing for me to read three hundred pages a day or more. If the book was interesting and I related to the characters, I would devour it. Rosalie and Alice lived their lives vicariously, while I lived my life in the pages of a book. The written word was fascinating to me so much so that I dreamed of writing my own novel one day.

Rosalie and I were as different as daylight and dark, but it just proves that opposites attract. She was beautiful and outgoing, while I was plain and shy. Rosalie said I never saw myself very clearly, but that is really hard when your best friend looks like a supermodel. She was beyond gorgeous with her blonde hair, blue eyes and tall shapely body. To me, my brown hair and brown eyes seemed very dull in comparison.

After we graduated from college, we moved into our own apartments, in the same building. Rosalie went to work for an advertising agency and I started working full time for her parents. My major in English literature became useful as I became a full time editor and began working on my own novel. At times, it seemed to go as slow as a snail.

Alice moved home around the same time as we did and started her own line of designer clothes. She purchased a building downtown opening a small boutique on the main level. The second level housed all of her sewing machines and where the designing took place. Then she took the other two levels and had them renovated into a loft apartment for herself.

She had four girls who worked for her helping her sew or sell, wherever they were needed. Rosalie did her advertising for her and Angela did her accounting. Sometimes I would model for her when she listed her clothes for sale on her website. Rosalie's brother Jasper set up her website and all of her internet sales for her. Alice had secretly had a crush on Jasper for years, but he was too big of an idiot to see what was right in front of him.

When Alice moved back home, Angela followed her and got a job as a certified public accountant at a local accounting firm. Rosalie and I had became close friends with Angela just like Alice had and we were ecstatic when she moved to Seattle to be with us. It was nice to have Angela in our group of friends, because she was a lot like me and didn't like to be the center of attention.

So the four of us, were thick as thieves, always going out together or hanging out at one of our apartments, emailing back and forth or texting each other. Friday night was always pizza, hot wing and movie night and Saturday night was always Mexican night, going out to our favorite Mexican restaurant and getting drunk as hell on margaritas.

Then there were our birthdays. We would spend the entire day together, pampering ourselves, treating ourselves however we wanted then going out to eat. Each time we would choose a different restaurant to eat, trying a new spot or a different style of food. We had traveled all over within a hundred mile radius to places that had received great reviews or that someone had recommended. It was a great way to experience new food at a new place and just spend time together.

My phone rang shrilly, breaking me out of my thoughts. Reaching over to pick up the phone, I glanced at the clock noticing the time and grinned. It was Alice. She always called me during her lunch break.

"Damn I'm glad you called." I stated, sighing happily into the receiver of the phone.

"One of these days Bella, you are going to answer the phone like that and it's not going to be me on the other line. What the hell are you going to do then?" Alice retorted then snickered at her on joke.

"No one calls me on this line but you, Rose, or Angela. Sometimes I'm lucky if my mom calls, when she is even in the country." But she was right; I should really watch what I say at work, although Mr. Hale would laugh his ass off at me. He was used to Rosalie and the way she talked and knew that I could talk smack with the rest of them.

"For someone who loves books and reading as much as you do, you're always bored as shit at work." Alice razzed me like she always does. Not near as bad as Rosalie, but in her own way.

"It's just…I can do what editing needs to be done in like no time. Then I have nothing else to do. I try to write, but I can't get in the mood like I can at home or at the coffee house. I tried to get Mr. Hale to give me something else to do, but he says if he gives me anything else, there won't be anything left for the rest of them to do. All three of them." Frowning, I thought about the one other full time editor here at Hale publishing besides me, Emmett.

Emmett was built like a jock, tall with broad shoulders, but was the biggest nerd you could ever imagine, wearing thick rimmed glasses and Converse shoes with dress pants. But he was really awesome, a book worm like me, could read faster than you could imagine and was in love with Rosalie. And that is what made me really frown, she didn't give him the time of day and he would never get up enough courage to speak to her. It had been that way for the past year since Emmett had worked here.

"I know how you are, you fucking hermit." Alice accused causing me to grimace. She had me there. Alice knows that I go three places alone, home, the coffee house, and the grocery store. Other than that, I go to work or out with them.

"I'm not a hermit Alice. I go out. We go out every Friday and Saturday night." Sarcasm was dripping from my voice; I hoped she would get the hint.

"Only with us. When was the last time you had a date Bella." Alice asked causing me to get defensive.

"Please don't start that Alice. I don't want to think about it." The last time I had gone out on a date, was over six months ago. I had met this really cool guy, or so I thought, at the coffee shop. He saw me typing and started a conversation with me. He asked me out the next time I saw him, and because Alice made me, I went out with him. If I had known he was going to be like a fucking octopus, I would have opted out on the date. He ended up with a bloody nose and my hand was broken. It wasn't funny, and I didn't like thinking about it.

"Okay. Okay. Anyway, the reason I called was to talk to you about Rosalie's birthday. Do you know where she has decided to go?"

"No, I haven't talked to her in a couple of days. She's been busy with that new ad campaign." Clicking on my inbox, I checked to see if I had gotten any new emails. There was one from Rosalie that had come in just recently.

TO: Alice Brandon; Bella Swan; Angela Webber

FROM: Rosalie Hale

SUBJECT: My Birthday

Well, it's that time of year again, my birthday. Get ready my bitches. This year I want to do something totally different. The girls here at the office have been to a place called arrow and that is where I want to go. Before you get your knickers in a twist Bella, get over it because it's my birthday and this is where were going. To check it out, google arrowseattle. I would put the entire link or web address in my email, but you know my server here at my office won't recognize it. Fuckers! Too bad you can't recognize what I'm doing with my middle finger!

Rosalie

I had to laugh at the last part. Rosalie's server at her office wouldn't recognize web addresses and frustrated the hell out of Rosalie. It was really stupid because you could get around it by putting the word dot instead of the period, but it was just annoying as hell.

After reading the email, I opened up my browser and googled the name to see what would come up. When I clicked on the link, I was directed to their website. The name of the club came across the screen, 'arrow' with the symbol for the male sex where the o went. A loading icon popped up, and when the main page loaded, the music started playing, and my mouth fell open. "You have got to be kidding me."

"Uh, no. She is perfectly serious. Some girls at her office went and couldn't shut up about it. Rosalie came by a little while ago to buy a new dress for her birthday and told me all about it. She wants to go this Saturday night."

The outline of a man's body shadowed with lights blinking all around looked like he was in the middle of a room crowded with people. The description boasted that they were the first male strip club that had ever opened in Seattle. 'See it ALL!' it claimed across the top of the web page. Along the bottom, there was a photo gallery of some of the male dancers. When I scrolled through the gallery of pictures, there were pictures of the strippers that danced at the club. They weren't naked in the picture, but clad only in a skimpy pair of something that looked like swim trunks showing off their bulges. Also there were pictures of the inside of the club, one showing the stage where they danced with a pole at the end.

"Tell me we aren't going to this place. Please." I begged. The thought of watching a man get up and dance naked in front of me made the blood rush to my face and I wasn't even there yet.

"It's Rosalie's birthday. You know the rules. When it's your birthday, you pick where we go." Alice retorted. "Besides that, it could be fun."

"Yea, right, fun. But we usually choose a restaurant, not a fucking strip club." Mumbling back to her, as I looked around on the website. There was another picture of the stage where they danced, this one with a man standing against a pole with his head thrown back in what looked like the throws of passion.

"Oh Bella. Grow up. You can't touch them. They can't touch you. What's the big deal?" Alice quipped back to me.

"The big deal is their naked. Aren't they?" I whispered back into the phone. Looking toward my door, I wanted to make sure that my door was closed so that no one could hear me or the stripper music streaming from my computer speakers. I wasn't real sure how Rosalie's parents would feel about their daughter's choice of entertainment. Plus I would be embarrassed as hell trying to explain it to anyone why I was looking at this website.

"Yep, there naked. That's why they call it a strip club." Alice whispered back, clearly making fun of me.

"Ha Ha. Very funny. You guys always get a kick out of making fun of me. It's just…I'm…I don't know if I can sit and watch that."

"Well, you know Rosalie. You aren't going to have a choice. If this is what she wants to do, this is what we are going to do. Rosalie always gets her way." Alice replied earnestly.

The fact was she was right. No matter what anybody else said, if Rosalie wanted to do something she was going to do it come hell or high water. It didn't matter to Rosalie if you were uncomfortable or not. It didn't matter if it wasn't your idea of fun or not. If Rosalie was inclined to jump in head first, you better be ready, because you were going to be the next one to jump.

"Fine. I guess you're right. It's her birthday, she gets to choose." Mumbling back, there really was no reason to try and fight it, nothing I said was going to make a difference.

Quickly I forwarded the link to Angela.

TO: Angela Webber

FROM: Bella Swan

SUBJECT: Rosalie's Birthday

This is the place Rosalie listed in her email. What do you think?

Bella

My phone beeped letting me know I had another call coming in, and after quickly getting off with Alice, I answered the other line.

"Bella Swan. May I help you?"

"Don't you sound all professional. What the hell are you doing besides nothing? And I know you're not doing shit. My dad won't let you do more than your share because he won't have anything for the rest of them to do. All three of them." Rosalie stated cheekily.

Rosalie just loved to give me hell, much more so than Alice. She knew how her dad was, the fact that he wouldn't give me anymore work than the rest of them. Knowing me all to well, that I had finished my work for the day, and I should be working on my novel, but just couldn't do it here in the office.

"What the hell is this? Pick on Bella day." I snapped back, giving Rosalie as good as she gives.

"Who else has been picking on you? I'll kick their ass. Just give me a name." Rosalie fumed. She was very protective of me. Sure she could call me every name in the book, tell me I looked like shit, or crawl my ass for any other reason she felt like, but no one else could. Rosalie would draw the circle and invite anybody in.

"Alice." That would shut her up. Alice was the only other one who could say anything to me without the repercussions of Rosalie dooming you.

"Damn she beat me to it." There was a pause and I could hear Rosalie talking with someone in the background. "Sorry about that. So you talked with Alice. Good we're all on the same page then."

"Well I don't know if we are all on the same page. But, yea I know what's doing." Every since I read The Black Dagger Brotherhood Series by J.R. Ward, I couldn't help but pick up on some of the lingo she used in the book. Twilight was awesome in its on right, but The Brothers, were a force to be reckoned with.

"Don't start talking shit to me." Rosalie laughed knowing exactly what I was saying. After reading about those hot vampires and their hot sex life, I had to tell the girls about it. I thought that maybe with all the sex and smack talking that Rosalie might finally give a book a chance. I was wrong. She did however ask me questions about the books and listened in rapt attention when I was describing the sex these vampires had.

Giggling, I answered back. "I feel you. Now are we seriously going to a strip club for your birthday?"

"Damn straight we are. Some of the girls here at the office went last weekend and said it was totally awesome. I know what your thinking so stop right there. You can't touch them because there is a law or some shit that says when a stripper is totally naked you have to be at least three feet away from them. Tiffany said that there is like a mote around the stage so you can't reach them."

"This is your birthday Rosalie, and I'll do whatever you want, but don't expect me to be comfortable about it." Lowering my voice to almost a whisper I continued. "What will your parents say when they find out?"

"It's my birthday. I'll do what I please. Fuck Bella, if mom knew we were going she would probably want to go with us. But let's not go there. I don't care what anybody thinks. Guys do it all the time, and no one says shit about that. We're a bunch of ladies who are just going to be entertained. Watching hot guys dance around a pole naked as hell. Yea, we're going. Deal." Rosalie ended with a huff. When she got like this, she would not be swayed. If she had her mind set, that was it. "Listen, I have to get back to this campaign I've been working on. It's a bitch. I'll call you tonight."

My computer signaled that I had an incoming email. Opening up my inbox, I saw that Angela had responded.

TO: Bella Swan

CC: Alice Brandon, Rosalie Hale

FROM: Angela Webber

Wow! I didn't even know a place like this existed. Guess this is the naughty version of Chippendale's. I'm game for whatever. Let me know what time to be ready. Don't worry Bella, it won't be that bad. You guys have a good rest of the week. I'm swamped. There are so many people out right now sick, we are falling behind.

Angela

Well I guess were going to a male strip club for Rosalie's birthday. Woo hoo!

A/N: Please review and let me know what you think. How will I know how I'm doing if you don't review? Until then, I'll be hiding with Linus under his blanket. Next chapter will be in Edward's POV.

If you want to see the place I went, just google arrownashville. Nothing but cock rings baby.