Author's note: Hello all! Thanksto all myreviewers-you made me hurry to finish writing! This chapter is dedicated to my anonymous reviewer rinn weasley, because without the lovely review they gave me, this story might not have been continued. :D Sorry that this chapter isn't as funny, but I needed to continue with the plot... Next chapter, perhaps! Thanks, and enjoy!

Chapter Two: Volapük

Ron trudged up the stairs towards the Hospital Wing, frowning in thought. Something seemed off about Venen, but nothing he could put his finger on. He wasn't necessarily cruel- at least, not as cruel as Snape. He seemed more of an annoying nuisance.

He dragged his feet as he climbed slowly up the stairs, convinced that he was in no immediate danger. Finally, Ron arrived at the Hospital Wing. Walking in, he saw many of his classmates lying on the hospital beds, and Madam Pomfrey bustling about with dozens of bottles crammed in her arms. She looked up as Ron entered the room.

She nodded her head in the direction of an empty bed. "Just lay down over there and I will be with you in a moment." As she shuffled away, he heard her mutter something to the effect of "Irresponsible… should have known better… making them drink their own potions!"

He laid down, left for a while to his own thoughts. He seems to be mean, but discretely…like he's hiding his true self… Madam Pomfrey interrupted his thoughts as she stopped by his bed. She instructed him to lay as motionless as possible, then retrieved a short and thin metal rod from one of her many pockets and ran it across Ron's entire body.

"There doesn't appear to be anything wrong with you, Mr. Weasley." She stated. "You are free to leave whenever you want." Ron quickly got up onto his feet and left in a haste. He desperately wanted to talk to Hermione about their new teacher.

"We've checked every possibility, Ron. There is no way that he is taking Polyjuice potion, he is definitely not a metamorphmagus, or he would be listed, and Hermione checked the library lists…"

Ron was sitting in the cozy Gryffindor common room talking to Harry about the new Potions master. "Where is 'Mione anyway?" Ron asked, looking around the common room.

Just as Ron began scanning the room, the portrait of the Fat Lady swung open to reveal Hermione with a large pile of books balanced in her hands. Ron smiled despite himself. How could anyone look that good, with a pile of books nearly covering their face? She rushed over to the two boys, and placed the books on an end table.

"I was trying to find information on Professor Venen's family history, but I found this," Hermione opened one of the many books to a marked page. She scanned through it then began to read aloud: "Venen: Volapük, noun: poison or venom."

"And that means…?" Ron yawned, then slid down further in his chair. It was only six o'clock on a Friday, but he was already bagged.

"I figured you'd ask that, so I took the liberty of looking up Volapük in my Muggle Studies textbook so that I didn't leave out any important details." She opened a second book. "Volapük was a universal language created by the muggle Johann Martin Schleyer. Schleyer was born and raised in Baden, a state in the southwest of Germany. When his son emigrated to America, he could not reach him by mail (the muggle communication system, much like owls) because the United States Postal Service could not read German. Schleyer soon decided to create a universal language. He wrote a full-length book on Volapük in 1880. The Volapük craze, however, was over in a few short years." Hermione looked up at them, her eyes bright.

"And that means…?" Ron repeated sleepily.

"Don't you get it Ronald! Venen could not possibly be his last name; Volapük is not even a recognized language!" Hermione stood up and began pacing. "Now, one option is that his great-great-great-grandparents were fanatics of the language, and took up one of the words as their name, but that seems highly unlikely." She continued.

"And the other?" Harry asked.

"The other is that it's a pseudonym." Hermione frowned. "But why would he want one? Unless his name is well known, and he doesn't want anyone to know who he is." Hermione finished, then sat down on the couch next to Ron. She curled up next to him and placed her head gently in his lap. Her eyes reflected the dancing fireplace as she thought. It was so comforting, knowing she was there. He felt her feeling her breathing in and out… Ron quickly faded away into a deep, dreamless sleep.

Ron awoke early Saturday morning with Hermione still curled up next to him, her head still placed gently in his lap. He would have stayed like this forever, had he not become so overwhelmingly nauseous. Ron tried to gently move her without waking her, but at the same time dash to the toilets. The result was a very awake Hermione who was suspended high in the air as Ron sprinted out of the room towards the boys' toilets.

More than embarrassed, Ron returned to the common room to see Hermione on her feet, wand in hand. The few early risers who had been sitting and talking were now staring at Ron and a few were snickering behind their hands. Hermione shot them a glare, and then glanced back at Ron.

"Sorry," he mumbled at his feet. Looking up, he could feel his ears turn red as she smiled forgivingly at him.

"What's wrong? You left rather quickly."

"I felt sick," he responded.

"Maybe you should go to the Hospital Wing. I'll go with you, if you'd like." Hermione suggested. She looked a little worried.

"I bet it's nothing," Ron shrugged. "But I'll go, just to make sure." Ron was almost certain that there was nothing wrong with him. A common flu, perhaps, but nothing to worry about. This, however, could be the perfect time to ask Hermione out with no distractions or interruptions.

The two began to make their way towards the Hospital Wing, talking merrily as they walked. She's even pretty this early in the morning! Ron thought to himself as she continued talking about how her family and herself had gone to Paris over the summer holidays. She stopped talking, and Ron felt that this was the perfect time to act.

Ron stopped, grabbed her hands and turned her towards him. Before he could say anything, though, Hermione leaned forward and kissed him.

Author's note: So what did you all think? I had to make several changes to this chapter after I finished writing it, to make sure it went flawlessly with chapter one.But everything is a-okay now! Hope you all enjoyed, and as a hint, reviews make me write faster ;) Thank you all!

G'day!
-TeenFictionist