A/N: Thanks to all those who reviewed so far! Aemilia Rose, cuylerjade, Jessica, and CharizardRulz-Cyborg009Wolf thanks for reviewing. I do answer questions, but not the stupid ones like 'Why are you writing so badly?' Yes. You are an idiot. So, I don't own Full Meal Alchemist, but if I did, Maes would still be alive…Also, sorry for the delay, but I was painting my room! Go blood maroon!

Title: Dragon Fruit and Cream
Rating: T. swearing.
Summary: Edward was never one for the mess' lunches

Maes practically was drooling, as was Havoc who sat beside the small blonde who was happily enjoying his treat. Winry, who was unable to make it out to Central, had sent Edward a box of fruits that were only found in Risembool.

"Just…"

"No."

"C'mon…"

"No way," Ed replied putting about cream covered piece of fruit in his mouth. "These are mine. Not yours. Mine. Besides, they're special…"

"Because your girlfriend gave them to you?"

"Ack! Where the hell did you come from?" Edward asked turned in his seat.

Mustang casually took a seat next to the red blonde and looked into the bowl he was hiding so well. He sighed and took a random fork. "Really now, is that anyway to treat your commanding officer?" he asked.

Edward frowned "Shouldn't you be doing paperwork?"

"Ah, but I am human too. I must stop to eat sometimes."

"Really? I thought you were demon spawn?" Edward shot back.

Maes snickered as Roy's eye twitched. "Now, now Edward, All I wanted to know is what that delectable looking fruit was," he said pointing his fork down at the bowl which was still tightly in Edward's grasp.

"Oh no you don't!"

Mustang sighed as Edward pulled the bowl closer to him.

"Look," Roy said pointing the fork in the opposite direction.

"I'm not that stupid you bastard Colonel."

"No. Really, that guy is making cracks about your height…something about being small than an ants knee?"

"Where!"

In the brief moment Edward was distracted; Roy stuck his fork in the bowl and took a piece of red fruit. Examining the piece of fruit on his fork, he watched as the cream dripped off it and onto his hand. Quickly licking it away, he smirked as he saw Maes and Havoc basically ask for him to give them some.

"Bastard!"

He popped the small fruit in his mouth. "You snooze you lose Edward. Besides, sharing is good for you. I only have your best interest at heart."

Silence followed as Roy so painfully made it obvious that he was enjoying the fruit. But it was indeed good. Roy decided that it tasted somewhere between a strawberry and banana. It was strange, yet tasty. Edward watched, frowning as Roy chewed the fruit and swallowed it. Roy licked the fork and put it back down on the table. "Delicious…"

"…heh."

They all looked at Edward who was smiling. "There's something I forgot to tell you…"

"Oh really, and what would that be?"

"The fruit, 'Dragon Fruit', ever heard of it?"

Before Mustang could open his mouth, Hughes burst out laughing. He turned to his friend with a puzzling look. Maes only laughed harder. "Roy, you're in for a real treat!" he managed to get out in between laughing.

"Huh?"

"Dragon fruit. Unless you've been brought up on it, it acts as a laxative."

"Oh…shit…"

"Precisely."

Before Mustang had a chance to get out of the Mess Hall quick enough, Ed started cracking up and having to hold his side incase he burst. "Remember Roy, sometimes I have your best interest at heart!"

I wanna say sorry again for the delays...I'll be more...harsh with my deadlines! Remember to R&R next time!

-Crystal Remnant