I OWN NOTHING!!! I DON'T OWN SANGO, MIROKU, ANY OTHER INUYASHA CHARACTERS NOR DO I OWN THE TITANIC
Riza: Hi! If you forgot, this is a Titanic parody with the characters of Inuyasha
Sango: Rose
Miroku: Jack
Inuyasha: Cal
Kagome: Ruth (Sango/Rose's mom)
Sesshomaru: Brock Lovett/Mr. Bodine
Naraku: Whale
Shippo: Fabrizio
Kouga: Lovejoy (Inuyasha's assistant)
other character's names have been changed to something anime-ish. You'll get it after a while.
BE AWARE: I DID CHANGE THE STORY IN VARIOUS PLACES!!!
Just inside the window of a local pub, a poker game was in progress. Four men, in working class clothes, were playing a very serious hand. Miroku Dawson and Shippo De Rossi, both about 20 years old, exchanged a glance as the other two players argued in Swedish. Miroku was American, a lanky drifter with his hair a little long for the standards of the times. He was also unshaven, and his clothes were rumpled from sleeping in them. He was an artist, and had adopted the bohemian style of art seen in Paris. He was also very self-possessed and sure-footed for 20, having lived on his own since 15.
The other two, resume thier play after yelling several things in Swedish which neither Miroku nor Shippo understand. Miroku pretends to have nothing in his hand and takes another card.
Bills and coins from four counrties are sitting on the table. This had been going on for a while. Sitting on top of the money were two 3RD CLASS TICKETS for RMS TITANIC. The last whistle blew as a warning call.
"The moment of truth boys. Somebody's life's about to change." Miroku said. Shippo put his cards down. So did the Swedes. Miroku held his close.
"Let's see... Shippo's got niente. Olaf, you've got squat. Sven, uh oh... two pair... mmm," He said worriedly, "sorry, Shippo."
"What? Sorry? What you got? You lose my money? Ma va fa'n culo testa di cazzo..."
"Sorry, you're not gonna see your mama again for a long time..." He slaped a full house down on the table, ''Cause you're goin' to America!! Full house boys!
"Porca Madonna!! YEEAAAAA!!!" The table exploded into shouting in several languages. Miroku raked in the money and the tickets. "
"Sorry boys. Three of a kind and a pair. I'm high and you're dry and..." He looked to Shippo, ''we're going to AMERICA!!! Goin' home... to the land o' the free and the home of the real hot-dogs! On the TITANIC!! We're ridin' in high style now! We're practically goddamned royalty!" One of the guys at the bar turned around and looked at them.
"Titanic's aleavin' in 5 minutes!" He said gruffly.
"SHIT! Shippo come on!" They two of them scopped up the money, Miroku grabbed the tickets and they ran. They ran up the ramp and the man standing at the door asked if they had gone through inspection.
"'Course we went through inspection and it wouldn't matter anyway 'cause we're americans, both of us."
"Oh...alright. Come aboard." The ran past him and to their third class room.
"We're the luckiest sons of bitches alive!" Miroku said as they ran down the hall. They dropped their stuff in their room and ran out onto the main deck. The ship was about to take off and there were millions of people saying goodbye to family members. Miroku ran to the side of the boat and waved frantically, Shippo soon joined him and they yelled goodbye. The boat whistles and begins to move. Titanici gains spead and is sailing away from the dock.
Meanwhile in Sango's world:
In contrast to the third class cabins where Miroku was, the so-called "Millionaire Suite" was in the Empire style, and comprised two bedrooms, a bath, WC, wardrobe room, and a large sitting room. In addition there was a private 50 foot promenade deck outside. A room service waiter poured champagne into a tulip glass of orange juice and handed the Bucks Fizz to Sango. She was looking through her new paintings. There was a Monet of water lilies, a Degas of dancers, and a few abstract works. They were all unknown paintings... lost works. Inuyasha was out on the covered deck, which had potted trees and vines on trellises, talking through the doorway to Sango in the sitting room.
"Those mud puddles were certainly a waste of money." He said.
"You're wrong. They're fascinating. Like in a dream... there's truth without logic. What's his name again... ?" She looked at the painting in her hand, "Picasso."
"He'll never amount to a thing, trust me. At least they were cheap." A porter wheels Inuyasha's private safe into the room on a handtruck.
"Put that in the wardrobe." The porter nodded and did as he was told.
QUICK SKIP TO SANGO AND SESSHOMARU
"At Cherbourg a woman came aboard named Margaret Brown, but we all called her Molly. History would call her the Unsinkable Molly Brown. Her husband had struck gold someplace out west, and she was what mother called "new money". By the next afternoon we had made our final stop and we were steaming west from the coast of Ireland, with nothing out ahead of us but ocean..."
Back to 1912
Miroku and Shippo are standing at the very front of the boat. They watch dolphins dart in and out of the way of the ship. Suddenly, Miroku yells at the top of his lungs,
"I"M KING OF THE WORLD!!!!!!!!""" He starts laughing.
Meanwhile:
The upperclass people including Inuyasha and Sango were enjoying their predinner (dinner in this context is lunch) conversation. Sango lit up a cigarette.
"You know I don't like that, Sango." Kagome said.
"She knows." Inuyasha said and pulled the cigarette out of her mouth, putting it out in an ashtray. She pouted and looked away.
"What would you like to eat, miss?" The waiter asked Sango. She opened her mouth to answer, but Inuyasha said they'd both have the lamb, rare with a little mint sauce.
"You like lamb, right?" He asked.
"You gonna cut her meat for her ,too, there, Inuyasha?" Molly asked sarcastically, "Hey, who came up with the name Titanic? You, Bruce?" Molly asked and looked to one of the men at the table.
"Yes, actually. I wanted to convey sheer size. And size means stability, luxury... and safety--" Bruce Ismay responded.
"Do you know of Dr. Freud? His ideas about the male preoccupation with size might be of particular interest to you, Mr. Ismay." Sango said.
The man choked on his breadstick, suppressing laughter.
"My God, Sango, what's gotten into--" Kagome asked mortified.
"Excuse me." She stalked away.
"She's a pistol, Inu. You sure you can handle her?" Molly asked.
"Well, I may have to start minding what she reads from now on."
Meanwhile:
Miroku sat on a bench in the sun. Titanic's wake spread out behind him to the horizon. He had his knees pulled up, supporting a leather bound sketching pad, his only valuable possession. With a small, black pencil he drew rapidly, using sure strokes. An emigrant from Manchester named Cartmell was watching the sea and his 3 year old daughter Cora was standing on the lower rung of the rail. She was leaned back against his beer belly, watching the seagulls. The sketch he was making captured them perfectly, with a great sense of the humanity of the moment. Miroku was good. Really good. Shippo looked over Miroku's shoulder. He nodded appreciatively.
Tommy Ryan, a scowling young Irish emigrant, watched as a crewmember came by, walking three small dogs around the deck. One of them, a black french bulldog, is among the ugliest creatures on the planet.
"That's typical. First class dogs come down here to take a shit." Tommy spat and leaned on the railing. Miroku looked up from his sketch.
"That's so we know where we rank in the scheme of things." He said.
"Like we could forget." Miroku glanced across the well deck. At the aft railing of B deck promenade stood a woman in a long yellow dress and white gloves. Miroku, unable to take his eyes off of her mumbled something about her name. They were across from each other, about 60 feet apart, with the well deck like a valley between them. She on her promontory, he on his much lower one. She was staring down at the water. He watched her unpin her elaborate hat and take it off. She looked at the frilly absurd thing, then tossed it over the rail. It sailed far down to the water and was carried away, astern. A spot of yellow in the vast ocean.
He is riveted by her. She looked like a figure in a romantic novel, sad and isolated. Shippo taps Tommy and they both look at Miroku gazin at Sango. Shippo and Tommy grin at each other. Sango turned suddenly and looked right at Miroku. He was caught staring, but he didn't look away. She did, but then looked back. Their eyes met across the space of the well deck, across the gulf between worlds. Miroku saw a man (Inuyasha) come up behind her and take her arm. She jerked her arm away. They argued in pantomime. She stormed away, and he went after her, disappearing along the A-deck promenade. Miroku stared after her.
"Forget it, boyo. You'd as like have angels fly out o' yer arse as get next to the likes o' her." Tommy said and Miroku shook his head to regain control of his body. He had been captivated.
Later at nighttime:
Snago sat flanked by people in heated conversation. Inu and Kagome were laughing together, while on the other side Lady Duff-Gordon was talking with them animatedly. Sango stared down at her plate, barely listening to the inconsequential babble around her.
QUICK SKIP TO SANGO AND SESSHOMARU
"I saw my whole life as if I'd already lived it... an endless parade of parties and cotillions, yachts and polo matches... always the same narrow people, the same mindless chatter. I felt like I was standing at a great precipice, with no one to pull me back, no one who cared... or even noticed."
BACK TO 1912
Sango poked a crab-fork into the skin of her arm, harder and harder until it draws blood. She is beyond annoyed and angry.
Later in the corridor:
Sango walked along the corridor. A steward coming the other way greeted her, and she nodded with a slight smile. She was perfectly composed.
She entered her room. Stood in the middle of it, staring at her reflection in the large vanity mirror. Just stood there, then-- with a primal, anguished cry she clawed at her throat, ripping off her pearl necklace, which exploded across the room. In a frenzy she tore at herself, her clothes, her hair... then attacked the room. She flung everything off the dresser and it flew clattering against the wall. She hurld a handmirror against the vanity, cracking it.
Sango ran out of the room and along the B deck promenade. She was dishevelled, her hair flying. She was crying, her cheeks streaked with tears. But also angry, furious! Shaking with emotions she didn't understand... hatred, self-hatred, desperation. A strolling couple watched her pass. Shocked at the emotional display in public.
Meanwhile:
Miroku was kicked back on one of the benches gazing at the stars blazing gloriously overhead. He was thinking artist thoughts and smoking a cigarette. He heard something, he turned as Sango ran up the stairs from the well deck. They were the only two on the stern deck, except for Quartermaster Rowe, twenty feet above them on the docking bridge catwalk. She didn't see Miroku in the shadows, and ran right past him.
She ran across the deserted fantail. Her breath hitched in an occasional sob, which she suppressed. Sango slamed against the base of the stern flagpole and stood there, panting. She stared out at the black water. Then started to climb over the railing. She had to hitch her long dress way up, and climbed clumsily over. Moving methodically she turned her body and got her heels on the white-painted gunwale, her back to the railing, facing out toward blackness. 60 feet below her, the massive propellers were churning the atlantin into white foam, and a ghostly wake trailed off toward the horizon. She leaned out, her arms straightening... looking down hypnotized, into the vortex below her. Her dress and hair were lifted by the wind of the ship's movement. The only sound, above the rush of water below, was the flutter and snap of the big Union Jack right above her.
"Don't do it." Miroku, who had been following her said quickly. She whipped her head around at the sound of his voice. It took a second for her eyes to focus.
"Stay back! Don't come any closer!" Miroku sees the tear tracks on her cheeks in the faint glow from the stern running lights.
"Take my hand. I'll pull you back in."
"No! Stay where you are. I mean it. I'll let go."
"No you won't."
"What do you mean no I won't? Don't presume to tell me what I will and will not do. You don't know me."
"You would have done it already. Now come on, take my hand." Sango was confused now. She couldn't see him very well through the tears, so she whiped them with one hand, almost losing her balance.
"You're distracting me. Go away."
"I can't. I'm involved now. If you let go I have to jump in after you."
"Don't be absurd. You'll be killed." Miroku took off his jacket.
"I'm a good swimmer." He started unlacing his left shoe.
"The fall alone would kill you."
"It would hurt. I'm not saying it wouldn't. To be honest I'm a lot more concerned about the water being so cold." She looked down. The reality factor of what she was doing was starting to sink in.
"How cold?"
"Freezing. Maybe a couple degrees over, He pulled his left shoe off and started unlacing his right shoe, "ever been to Wisconsin?"
"No."
"Well they have some of the coldest winters around, and I grew up there, near Chippewa Falls. Once when I was a kid me and my father were ice-fishing out on Lake Wissota... ice-fishing's where you chop a hole in the--"
"I know what ice fishing is!"
"Sorry. Just... you look like kind of an indoor girl. Anyway, I went through some thin ice and I'm tellin' ya, water that cold... like that right down there... it hits you like a thousand knives all over your body. You can't breathe, you can't think... least not about anything but the pain. Which is why I'm not looking forward to jumping in after you. But like I said, I don't see a choice. I guess I'm kinda hoping you'll come back over the rail and get me off the hook here." He took off his other shoe.
"You're crazy."
"That's what everybody says. But with all due respect, I'm not the one hanging off the back of a ship." He slid one step closer, like moving up on a spooked horse.
"Come on. You don't want to do this. Give me your hand." Sango stared at the madman for a long time. She looked at his eyes and they somehow suddenly seemed to fill her universe.
"Alright." She unfastened one hand from the rail and reached it around toward him. He reached out to take it, firmly.
"I'm Miroku Dawson."
"Pleased to meet you, Mr. Dawson." Sango started to turn. Now that she had decided to live, the height was terrifying. She was overcome by vertigo as she shifted her footing, turning to face the ship. As she started to climb, her dress gets in the way, and one foot slipped off the edge of the deck. She plunged, letting out a piercing shriek. Miroku, gripping her hand, was jerked toward the rail. Sango, barely grabbed a lower rail with her free hand. Quartermaster Rowe up on the docking bridge heared the scream and headed for the ladder.
"HELP! HELP!!" Sango yelled.
"I've got you. I won't let go." Miroku held her hand with all his strength, bracing himself on the railing with his other hand. Sango tried to get some kind of foothold on the smooth hull. Miroku tried to lift her body over the railing. She couldn't get any footing in her dress and evening shoes, and she slipped back. Sango screamed again. Miroku, awkwardly clutching Sango by whatever he can get a grip on as she flailed, got her over the railing. They fell together onto the deck in a tangled heap, spinning in such a way that Jack winds up slightly on top of her. Rowe slid down the ladder from the docking bridge like it was a fire drill and sprinted across the fantail.
"Here, what's all this?!" He said as he ran up and pulled Miroku off of Sango, revealing her dishevelled and sobbing on the deck. Her dress was torn, and the hem is pushed up above her knees, showing one ripped stocking. He looked at Miroku, the shaggy steerage man with his jacket off, and the first class lady clearly in distress, and started drawing conclusions. Two seamen chugged across the deck to join them.
"Here you, stand back! Don't move an inch!You two, fetch the Master at Arms."
Riza: Okay, that's enough...we'll get further later.
Kago: Is the lemon coming up.
Riza: probably in the fourth chapter
Kago: I have to wait that long?
Riza: yes