A/N Okay, so, I was actually debating continuing this or dropping this. But everyone who's read this has told me to continue it, so I will.

But discretion is very strongly advised, because this story will be very twisted and very sadistic. Stop reading if any of this makes you uncomfortable, but I feel like this is the type of story that nobody would write, and it really should be written, sick or not. It isn't advised for the weak at heart.

And someone had pointed this out to me in the first chapter; I made a grammatical error in one of my sentences mixing up the word "hand" for "head".

If you know me, or if you've seen my complaints about myself on my other stories, I type extremely fast, and I use Wordpad, which doesn't have any type of grammar check. Please bear with me if I make errors. I promise I won't screw anything up too badly. I'll start editing the chapters in the Fanfiction editor, but that's about all I can do.

And in order to keep all you guys safe, I'll put a warning at the beginning of each chapter.

Title: The Puppet Paradox

Disclaimer: Characters not mine, idea mine.

Characters: Souichi, Morinaga, Masaki

Rating: T

Warnings: Intense language, touchy-feelyness, kissing

PS: All Asian words are translated at the bottom in the ending author note.

Enjoy the story c:

Souichi was fuming; he had actually agreed to spend an afternoon, under Morinaga's protection of course, with the very being that put Tetsuhiro through emotional hell. 'Why the fuck did he agree to this, anyway? Why did Morinaga agree to meet with him?' It was moments like this he wished that Masaki's suicide attempts actually worked, so that the devil wouldn't be with them anymore and Souichi wouldn't have to bust his ass to keep Morinaga in line.

No, he couldn't think that let alone actually say it. That would devastate Morinaga; even if his kouhai didn't love Masaki any longer, he was still too nice a person to be one to spit crude words as freely as Souichi did. He wouldn't be able to comprehend the vulgarities that came out of his Senpai's mouth. Souichi could only imagine the initial look of absolute shock, horror, and devastation on the man's face; 'What did Senpai just say? Is this reality? How can he dare say that so freely?'

And of course, that was the last thing that Souichi wanted – a heartbroken, helpless Morinaga.

Something he very well needed to learn how to do was bite his tongue. It much too often cause him and others around him grief. The truth of the matter was, he never always meant it, anyway. Tetsuhiro was too sensitive, he sometimes thought to himself. He wasn't anywhere near as big of an asshole as Souichi was. He felt for everyone around him, felt that everyone was equal and deserved a second chance. Souichi thought that if they were incompetent enough to blow a first chance, then a second one was practically an emotional suicide. If he had any control over Masaki's request to meet with Tetsuhiro, he would've immediately refused and denied further conversation. But Tetsuhiro didn't live by those philosophies. He went along with each punch in the throat that life threw at him. He slinked past his obstacles and improved from them meanwhile. To him, life was nothing to pop a vessel over. Humans were emotionally structured to overcome problems. The only problem here was – Souichi wasn't emotionally stable.

Not only did he have constant battles with himself, but he was on edge, frightened that that pervert kouhai of his would pull a move and cop a feel when he least expected it. It didn't help that by now he knew, better than the skin of his palm, what Morinaga's favorite spots on him were. He tried his best to keep them away from reach whilst at school and keep them covered and protected. He knew people stared at him strangely in the cafeteria when he was with the man; hand plastered over the ear exposed by long tied hair, the other hand keeping his lap coat pulled shit, shielding the skin that his button-down shirt didn't cover.

He would go into school, hickeys on his hip bones and behind his ears from the previous night. He would do his best to keep them hidden, but his self conscious constantly alerted him of random females snickering, and his insecurity drove him to thinking they were laughing at him. Normally, it was just girl students gushing about a boy student they were crushing on. Souichi would overreact and jump to the assumption that they could see, plain as day, his battle wounds. His hands would swarm over various parts of his body and he would rush out of the room in embarrassment.

He didn't hate it, but his colleagues couldn't know that! That would shatter his professional aura, and now everyone would see him as someone vulnerable, someone able to be taken advantage of and ravaged. And while he would be suffering, his fellow peers' beloved Morinaga Tetsuhiro would be receiving claps on the back and words of appraisal thrown around like birthday confetti. Souichi wouldn't receive praise of any kind even if people knew he was with Morinaga; he had always been known as the one that treated gay people like stairs, walking all over them.

Then it didn't help that Tetsuhiro's ex-whore Masaki decided to burn a hole through their relationship by showing up and requesting his company. Even Souichi knew that Tetsuhiro was too soft and too forgiving. 'He actually forgave this piece of shit for cheating on him! He forgave Masaki!'

And what if Masaki stole him and snuck off to a secluded area with him and left hickeys on his erogenous zones, just like Tetsuhiro often did to Souichi as a reminder of his love? Souichi couldn't even handle the thought of it.

'Not happening. I'll kill both of them if Masaki even thinks about making a move.'

"Bastard, what the fuck do you think you're doing?" Souichi snapped as he attempted to enter his room and dress himself. He and Morinaga were going on a picnic with that little bitch Masaki, and he wasn't happy one bit about it. But Morinaga happened to be all peaches and cream about it, and was even taking out an outfit for Souichi to wear.

"Picking out clothes for you, Senpai." Morinaga smiled and said with an unusual amount of nonchalance, tossing his hair gently to the side to be able to see Senpai's pink expression better.

"Who said I needed help picking out clothes? Masaki isn't gonna give a shit what I wear. You might as well just fucking wear a shoelace for all he cares." Souichi grumbled and sat on the edge of his bed, staring at his hands in his lap. He'd been grumpy all day, wanting to die before he'd even think about going near Masaki. He wasn't about to let his kouhai be a victim of surreptitious rape because he was stupid enough not to listen to Souichi, who, apparently, knew even the meaning of life.

"Senpai, can you please just be kind for today?" Morinaga looked up at him, a faint facade of desperation and ignorance written across his face. "I know he's probably the last person you'd even attempt to be kind to, but please, don't ruin this for me. He just wants to talk."

Senpai snorted. "Sure. Just talk, is it? Talking leads to fucking and fucking leads to abuse. He's abused you before. Don't think he won't do it again. You're a dumbass, but I seriously hope you're not that stupid."

Morinaga sighed. The things he did for this man. He swore, he really couldn't understand his reasons. Senpai was so coldhearted, so stubborn, yet so passionate and so sinful. Senpai had the worst of attitudes, and everyone knew it would bring him nothing but trouble. His family scorned him for his personality, assuming that he'd be lonely forever, since nobody could ever have enough patience to put up with the bomb, waiting to detonate, that was Souichi.

"And what are you gonna wear, huh?" Souichi sent a rotten smirk at him. "A suit and tie? Gonna take him out on a date?"

Tetsuhiro laughed to himself. "Well, Senpai, I could always… wear you." He crept over to Souichi until the man was trapped between his kouhai's body and the wall.

Souichi turned bright red and began to stutter, pounding his fist into the wall behind him. "Y-you… th-that's not… pervert!" He thrust his body against Tetsuhiro's, trying to drive him away, but his kouhai had other plans.

In the spur of Souichi's lithe body pressing against him, Tetsuhiro bucked his hips, causing Souichi to gasp and buckle, scrambling for balance upon his kouhai's arms.

"I'm a what now?" Tetsuhiro smiled and looked down at his blushing Senpai. He looked so… scrumptious.

"You… y-you're a… ah!" Souichi couldn't think of a way to form coherent sentences. Tetsuhiro had him pinned flat against the wall, hips gently rolling into his Senpai's. Souichi struggled to get free, struggled to push him off, but at the same time he didn't want to stop. His hips responded, bucking right back and meeting Tetsuhiro move for move.

"A what Senpai? Say it." His kouhai stated with a rough thrust, making Souichi gasp in tormented pleasure. This was so wrong, but so right. He wanted to stop, but he couldn't. He had no control over his actions, and every cell in his body was screaming for more. He was panting, aroused, squeaking out his needs. He wanted more, he needed more, he was so filthy but he needed more.

"S-stop… can't… I… ha… h…" Souichi's knees gave out and he slid down the wall, disconnecting his pelvis from Tetsuhiro's. He whimpered from the loss of contact, but he needed to get out of this situation. Now.

"Hmm… you really can't hold it…" Tetsuhiro kneeled down to his level, brushing long blonde hair away from frustrated eyes. He placed a gentle kiss on the bridge of Souichi's nose before turning and closing the wardrobe, gently flinging the clothes he'd picked out at Souichi with a flick of his wrist.

"Sh-shut up and get ready. We're supposed to be… meeting with him. Idiot."

The drive was agonizingly quick. Souichi wanted it to last longer, wanted to have Tetsuhiro all to himself for more time. Out of stubborn consideration, Souichi had (with Tetsuhiro's cooking skills, of course) packed a large Shokado bento filled with onigiri, cheese, apples, sesame japchae, red bean taiyaki, raisin tteok, and salted youtiao. He didn't know what Masaki would like, but frankly he didn't care. The whore would have to suck it up and shove it down if he wanted any.

He had snuck a whiskey-filled flask in his side bag, hoping Tetsuhiro wouldn't notice. If he did he'd hit him. He wouldn't be able to tolerate all afternoon with this prick. He needed to get his fix, since Tetsuhiro had already forced him to leave all his cigarettes at home.

They went to the central park, planning to go out into one of the fields and sit down and eat and talk. It was a calm park, one that animals were restricted from, and one that everyone would go to and spend time with their children and fly kites and relax on the field. Today was a particularly mild day; it wasn't hot, which meant that not a lot of people would be there.

And as the car pulled to a stop in the lot and Tetsuhiro went around the side to open Souichi's door, the only logical thought that Souichi could make – Kill me.

He wasn't looking forward to it. Not at all. He would much rather let Tetsuhiro have his way with him twice a day every day, than meet with the garbage that ruined Tetsuhiro's teenage life.

"Come on, Senpai. You can't enjoy our food if you're sitting in the car all day. Come on. I have blankets if you get cold." Tetsuhiro whined and reached an arm around to unclick Souichi's seatbelt buckle, and Souichi tsk-ed at him.

"It's not cold out. Stop treating me like a wife."

Tetsuhiro grinned. "Why? Don't I know how to take good care of you, Senpai?"

"I can take care of my damn self!" Souichi grumbled and shoved the bento box into his kouhai's chest, pushing himself down out of the car and slamming the door shut. "Let's get this shit over with."

Tetsuhiro smiled. "I love you, Senpai." He reached out to link his hand with Souichi's.

Souichi whipped back at him. "D-don't do these irrelevant things!"

"Why not? It's you I love. Not Masaki. And don't ever think that it's the other way around."

"Who said anything about him?!" Souichi growled. "Just shut up already!"

"Are you jealous, Senpai?" His hand released Souichi's as it crawled its way to Senpai's butt and gave a firm squeeze. He couldn't wait to get home and ravish the treat in front of him. He thought he would never be able to get enough of his Senpai.

"Hah!" Souichi's back arched as if someone had put ice on his spine. "N-not in your dreams…!"

"Hm, I wish." Tetsuhiro sighed. "Only in my dreams, do I get to see that lovely specter that I call my Senpai." He began to pull Souichi gently across the cobblestone path to the field. Cherry blossom trees fenced the path, littering their rosy petals on the pathway. "My Senpai takes care of me, kisses me when I come home from work, picks out my bedclothes for me, showers with me, voluntarily sleeps in my bed." He rambled on things that the real Souichi never did. "He lets me brush his long, soft, beautiful hair."

"Stop visiting me in your dreams. That's… weird." Souichi looked away and blushed, flattered and embarrassed. He hated when Morinaga pointed out his feminine features. He wasn't a woman.

Tetsuhiro chuckled. "Hey. We're here. You ready?"

"No…" Souichi mumbled, looking away. He wasn't able to look for long because Tetsuhiro's fingers found a grip of his face and planted his lips on Souichi's. The kiss was brief, but it was deep and hot and full of love and passion.

Souichi didn't push away, glad to be hidden by the pink trees. The kiss sent sparks down his spine and into his legs, igniting his skin and desire. He was becoming hungry, thirsting for satisfaction. Morinaga's tongue was bigger than his, soft and warm and moist; he craved the feel and the taste of it. He wanted more.

But he couldn't.

They were out. In public. With Masaki.

"Hah… ah… no…" Souichi gently shoved him away, tongue recoiling back into his mouth. His tongue tingled, pleased with the stimulation.

"You can do it, Senpai. Just don't kill him, please." Tetsuhiro smiled and went first, pushing past the last branches of the trees leading into the fields. It took him a moment to find the slender blonde figure, but he eventually spotted it perched against a tree about thirty feet away, facing the sky. "Ah! Masaki-san!"

The figure turned around to the source of the voice. "Tetsuhiro! Tatsumi-san…!"

Tetsuhiro ran over, looking down on Masaki. Even as full grown adults, Tetsuhiro was still the tallest. Masaki hadn't grown much; golden blonde hair reaching past his shoulders, soft black eyes, the same handsomely fragile face countered by a defined heart-shaped jaw. It wasn't sculpted in the femininely angelic was that Souichi's was. It wasn't Tetsuhiro's preference.

"Masaki-san… how've you been?" Tetsuhiro felt awkward; he didn't know what to say to Masaki. Is life okay? How is it going with Kunihiro? How's your job at the bar? Are you thinking about raising a family? Are you thinking about marriage? Are you thinking about divorce?

"Oh, just fine really…" Masaki answered honestly, motioning for the two lovers to sit down on the grass with him. Souichi looked like he wanted to run away. His clothes felt too revealing, and he felt Masaki's eyes on him. Tetsuhiro gladly accepted the offer and took the bento box, setting it down on the grass and sitting with his legs crossed. He began to untie the string on the box. "I see Kunihiro often at the bar; he comes in with some colleagues from work, and he always orders a martini. He doesn't have much variety when it comes to taste buds."

Tetsuhiro grinned and nodded. "He never really has. Even as a child he was picky. I always used to cook when mom was at work, but Kunihiro wanted no part of it. He was stubborn and insisted that only mom's cooking was good."

"Yeah, well…" Masaki shrugged, "he would never want to cook because he admired my cooking so much. We never ate out. He always wanted me to cook."

"Oh! T-that's great, Masaki-san!" Tetsuhiro broke out into an appreciative smile. He felt something brush his left shoulder, and turned slightly to see Souichi sitting down, face red, eyes at the ground. He had his side pressed against his, not wanting to go anywhere else.

Masaki nodded. "And Tatsumi-san."

Souichi's eyes darted up, full of fear and malevolence. "What?"

"How are you and Tetsuhiro? I hope you're taking good care of him."

"I-I am! Who are you to say that?!"

"Hm, I'm just asking."

"Well don't ask."

"But you're his lover, are you not?" Masaki looked straight into Souichi's eyes; he was completely serious. "Lovers are supposed to take care of their significant other." He could see Tetsuhiro blushing at this comment and looking from Masaki to Souichi. He was probably gauging Souichi's reaction.

"Wh-who are you to tell me this?! We're not lovers! He's my kouhai!"

"Oh, I know~." He drawled on, waving his hand passively. "Are you the submissive one?"

Souichi blushed bright red. Every muscle in his body was moving to hit him. Tetsuhiro immediately stood up, frantically brushing off his clothes.

"U-uh, I'm gonna go buy us some drinks from the vending machine! I won't be a minute!" Tetsuhiro ran off; most likely to avoid the situation.

"How dare you!" He swung but didn't have much luck as Masaki caught his fist with a calm hand. Masaki's eyes were cold and full of promise. Souichi couldn't stand to look in them; he hated this bitch with everything in him, and now he had a growing fear of what he might do. Souichi had been taught for years by Tetsuhiro to be soft and pliable like a woman, to be the taker and not the giver. God knows if he could stand up for himself in this case.

"How dare I? How dare you." Masaki shoved his hand away. Souichi's eyes widened at his change in character; he was just sweet and dandy, but now he looked ready to eat him. 'What is his problem?!'

"W-wha?"

"How dare you." Masaki repeated, slowly walking towards Souichi, causing him to back up to keep his space. "You're with Tetsuhiro, but you don't treat him like you care about him. He loves you with all his heart, for God's sake! You don't care! He tells me all the time how much he wishes that you would acknowledge the fact that he would die for you, and you don't give him so much as a thank you."

Souichi was stunned. "W-who are you to tell me about me and Morinaga?! We're fine so just leave us alone!"

"Oh I can't," Masaki had him pressed against a garbage can. If the cold metal in his lower back wasn't comfortable, then the hand running through his hair was definitely not, "because now you've gotten me intrigued." Souichi could feel Masaki's breath on him.

"What do you mean…?" Souichi was shaking; he tried to control it, but the fear in him wouldn't allow it. Where was Tetsuhiro to come to the rescue and shove the bastard off of him? Where was he to come and see that Souichi had been right about Masaki all along? Where was he?

"I want you. " The words were said as a hot husky breath right against his ear. "And I intend to have you one way or another."

…What?!

It ignited Souichi like nothing he said had. "Wh-what are you saying, you sick fuck!"

"I want you." Masaki stated plainly and apathetically. "Don't you look at yourself in the mirror every day? You're everything delicious to the homosexual eye. And if you won't let Tetsuhiro have you, then I will. And if you refuse, I'll kill Tetsuhiro." Masaki's words faded away as his body did also. Tetsuhiro was coming back. Souichi could hear his dim voice in the distance.

"Y-you wouldn't!"

"Oh? I wouldn't? I already killed him emotionally in high school. What makes you think I can't finish what I started?"

Souichi had a difficult time breathing; what the hell was he to do? Should he tell Tetsuhiro? How the fuck would he even do that? Tetsuhiro wouldn't believe him; he had too much respect for Masaki already. What was he to do? Ignore it? What if Masaki snuck into their apartment and raped Souichi in his sleep?

"Why are you doing this?" Souichi asked lowly, hiding his face in his long hair as his voice quivered. He was scared the man would jump on him any second.

"Why not?" Masaki smirked at him. "You don't love Tetsuhiro. You would be with any guy regardless if they loved you, as long as they were a good fuck."

Souichi's temper flared. "You son of a bitch!" His first instinct would be to smack him, but Masaki had good reflexes. He'd caught Souichi's last punch before it came in contact with his face.

"Ah ah ah, better watch what you say. Your loving kouhai is coming back." Masaki jutted out his chin in superiority.

"Masaki-san! Senpai!" Tetsuhiro came running over to them, soda cans in each hand. The muscles in his neck and arms flexed as he slowed down. His eyes sparkled with innocence and quiet ignorance, completely unaware of the evil that was brewing from his ex lover. "What did I miss?"

Souichi's throat tightened and he couldn't speak, but it wasn't like he'd have anything productive to say anyway. His voice caught in his throat as his reflux began to spike. He felt as if he would vomit; the pressure was just too much. All he wanted was to live a calm life with his kouhai, but he couldn't even have that. The uncertainty was deafening, and when he had nobody to ask for help, the anxiety was even worse.

"Tatsumi-san and I were discussing how wonderful you are doing at your new job~!" Masaki placed his hands on his hips and rotated them slightly to accentuate his point.

"Eh?" Tetsuhiro was surprised yet flattered. "Th-thank you! Senpai is very supportive of me." He smiled and caressed Souichi's hair, softly combing his fingers through the strands and making sure to gently massage his scalp.

Souichi couldn't help but back up into Morinaga's arms, completely comfortable as two warm arms wrapped around his torso, keeping him safe. Did he love Morinaga? And what the fuck did Masaki mean? 'You would be with any man as long as they were a good fuck. You don't love Tetsuhiro.' He wasn't gay, dammit! He wasn't someone that could be thrown around like a prostitute! He belonged with Tetsuhiro. He was with him willingly, wasn't he? Telling the idiot to stay by his side? Wasn't that enough?

"Oh, I hope he is~." Masaki grinned. "You really deserve it, Tetsuhiro." He made sure to glance over at Souichi while speaking. The weary stare he was rewarded with confirmed his suspicions of how well he'd frightened his ex's lover. 'How cute.'

Tetsuhiro smiled and giggled quietly, idiosyncratically pushing up Souichi's sweater and stroking his bare stomach. Souichi sighed in comfort. He was so helpless.

"Well, I'm hungry. Let's eat this bento!"

Tetsuhiro began to pass out paper plates and chopsticks, motioning to Souichi to sit next to him.

His thoughts haunted him. He was capable of taking care of himself, but in this situation he relied on Tetsuhiro to be his bodyguard. He counted on all the love that Tetsuhiro had for him to keep him safe. He didn't know what kind of history Masaki had as a sadist, but judging his confidence, Souichi could only guess that he wasn't new at it. As he huddled up to Tetsuhiro's side in both the light of the cool weather and the fear of being taken by Masaki, he had one thought that he couldn't shake away.

'What do I tell Morinaga?'

A/N So yeah, lol. This was actually hard to write, but whatever, I did it. While writing, I always feel like it isn't fluid enough. Please let me know if it is or isn't. Review and favorite, please.

Onigiri – rice balls, sometimes wrapped in dried seaweed

Shokado – a sleek black bento box

Japchae – stir-fried cellophane noodles; usually served with vegetables and beef or pork

Taiyaki –pastry that can be filled with various meats or fruits

Tteok – gluttonous rice cakes; usually sweetened (I love tteok~)

Youtiao – cooked rolls of dough, kind of like soft pretzels; usually salted