Disclaimer. All publicly recognizable characters, settings etc., are the property of their respective owners. The original characters, ideas and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended. I only do this for fun. –B
Chapter 1
(Bella's POV)
I was ninety-nine point nine percent sure I was dreaming.
The reasons I was so certain were that, first, I was standing in a bright shaft of sunlight – the kind of blinding clear sun that never shone on my drizzly new hometown in Forks, Washington – and second, I was looking at my Grandma Marie. Gran had been dead for six years now, so that was solid evidence toward the dream theory.
Gran hadn't changed much; her face looked just the same as I remembered it. The skin was soft and withered, bent into a thousand tiny creases that clung gently to the bone underneath. Like a dried apricot, but with a puff of thick white hair standing out in a cloud around it.
Our mouths – hers a wizened picker – spread into the same surprised half-smile at just the same time.
Apparently, she hadn't been expecting to see me, either.
I was about to as her a question; I had so many – What was she doing here in my dream? What had she been up to in the past six years? Was Pop okay, and had they found each other, wherever they were? – but she opened her mouth when I did, so I stopped to let her go first. She paused, too, and then we both smiled at the little awkwardness.
"Bella!" It wasn't Gran who called my name, and we both turned to see the additions to our small reunion. I didn't have to look to know who it was; this was a voice I would know anywhere- know, and respond to, whether I was awake or asleep…or even dead, I'd bet. The voice I'd walk through fire for – or, less dramatically, slosh every day through the cold and endless rain for.
Edward.
Even though I was always thrilled to see him – conscious or otherwise – and even though I was almost positive that I was dreaming, I panicked as Edward walked toward us through the glaring sunlight with Lilly and Jasper trailing behind him.
I panicked because Gran didn't know that I was in love with a vampire or that my best friend and his family were vampires too – nobody knew that – so how was I supposed to explain the fact that the brilliant sunbeams were shattering of their skin into a thousand rainbow shards like they were made of crystal or diamond? Lilly was a little different, but she still glowed and sparkled throughout the surrounding light.
Well, Gran, you might have noticed that my boyfriend and his family glitters. It's just something they do in the sun. Don't worry about it…
What were they doing? The whole reason they lived in Forks, the rainiest place in the world, was so that they could be outside in the daytime without exposing their family's secret. Yet here they were, strolling gracefully toward me – with the most beautiful smiles on their glorious faces- as if I were the only one here.
In that second, I wished that I was not the one exception to Edward's mysterious talent; I usually felt grateful that I was the only person whose thoughts he couldn't hear just as clearly as if they were spoken aloud.
But now I wished he could hear me, too, so that he could hear the warning I was screaming in my head.
I shot a panicked glance back at Gran, and saw that it was too late. She was just turning to stare back at me, her eyes as alarmed as mine.
Jasper wrapped his arms around Lilly as she smiled happily at me as they stopped in front of me and Edward – still smiling so beautifully that my heart felt like it was going to swell up and burst through my chest – put his arm around my shoulder and we all turned to face my grandmother.
Gran's expression surprised me. Instead of looking horrified, she was staring at me sheepishly, as if waiting for a scolding. And she was standing in such a strange position – one arm held awkwardly away from her body, stretched out and then curled around the air; like she had her arm around the air. Like she had her arm around someone I couldn't see, someone invisible… Only then, as I looked at the bigger picture, did I notice the huge gilt frame that enclosed my grandmother's form. Uncomprehending, I raised the hand that wasn't wrapped around Edward's waist and reached out to touch her. She mimicked the movement exactly, mirrored it. But where our fingers should have met, there was nothing but cold glass… With a dizzying jolt, my dream abruptly became a nightmare.
There was no Gran.
That was me.
Me in the mirror. Me – ancient, creased, and withered.
Lilly and Jasper stood wrapped around each other off to the side, while Edward stood behind me. They casted no reflections; excruciatingly lovely and never ageing.
He pressed his icy, perfect lips against my wasted cheek.
"Happy Birthday," he whispered.
I woke with a start – my eyelids popping open wide – and gasped. Dull gray light, the familiar light of an overcast morning, took the place of the blinding sun in my dream.
Just a dream, I told myself. It was only a dream. I took a deep breath, and then jumped again when my alarm went off. The little calendar in the corner of the clock's display informed me that today was September thirteenth.
Only a dream, but prophetic enough in one way, at least. Today was my birthday. I was officially eighteen years old.
I'd been dreading this day for months.
All through the perfect summer – the happiest summer I had ever had, the happiest summer anyone anywhere had ever had, and the rainiest summer in the history of the Olympic Peninsula – this bleak date had lurked in ambush, waiting to spring.
And now that it had hit, it was even worse than I'd feared it would be. I could feel it – I was older. Every day I got older, but this was different, worse, quantifiable. I was eighteen.
And Edward would never be.
When I went to brush my teeth, I was almost surprised that the face in the mirror hadn't changed. I stared at myself, looking for some sign of impending wrinkles in my ivory skin. The only creases were the ones on my forehead, though, and I knew that if I could manage to relax, they would disappear. I couldn't. My eyebrows stayed lodged in a worried line over my anxious brown eyes.
It was just a dream, I reminded myself again. Just a dream… but also my worst nightmare.
I skipped breakfast, in a hurry to get out of the house as quickly as possible. I wasn't entirely able to avoid my dad, and so I had to spend a few minutes acting cheerful. I honestly tried to be excited about the gifts I'd asked him not to get me, but every time I had to smile, it felt like I might start crying.
I struggled to get a grip on myself as I drove to school. The vision of Gran – I would not think of it as me – was hard to get out of my head. I couldn't feel anything but despair until I pulled into the familiar parking lot behind Forks High School and spotted Edward leaning motionlessly against his polished silver Volvo, like a marble tribute to some forgotten pagan God of beauty. The dream had not done him justice. And he was waiting there for me, just the same as every other day.
Despair momentarily vanished; wonder took its place. Even after half a year with him, I still couldn't believe that I deserved this degree of good fortune.
I was surprised to see that along with Alice, who was standing by his side, waiting for me too was Lilly and Jasper.
They had been on a three week honeymoon somewhere on a private island in Fiji. Apparently, Jasper owned the island for the past twenty years and surprised her with it.
The sight of Alice waiting there with them – her tawny eyes brilliant with excitement, and a small silver-wrapped squared in her hands – made me frown. I'd told Alice I didn't want anything, not gifts or even attention, for my birthday. Obviously, my wishes were being ignored.
I slammed the door of my 53' Chevy truck – a shower of rust specks fluttered down to the wet blacktop – and walked slowly toward where they were waiting. Alice skipped forward to meet me, her pixie face glowing under her spikey black hair.
"Happy Birthday, Bella!"
"Shh!" I hissed, glancing around the lot to make sure no one had heard her. The last thing I wanted was some kind of celebration of the black event.
She ignored me. "Do you want to open your present now or later?" she asked eagerly as we made our way to where Edward, Lilly and Jasper still waited.
"No presents," I protested in a mumble.
She finally seemed to process my mood. "Okay… later, then. Did you like the scrapbook your mom sent you? And the camera from Charlie?" I sighed. Of course she would know what my birthday present were. Edward wasn't the only member of his family with unusual skills. Alice would have "seen" what my parents were planning as soon as they'd decided that themselves.
"Yeah, they're great."
"I think it's a nice idea. You're only a senior once, might as well document the experience."
"How many times have you been a senior?"
"That's different."
We reached the rest of the group then, and Edward held out his hand for mine. I took it eagerly, forgetting, for a moment, my glum mood. His skin was, as always, smooth, hard, and very cold. He gave my fingers a gentle squeeze. I looked into his liquid topaz eyes, and my heart gave a not-quite-so-gently squeeze of it's own.
Hearing the stutter in my heartbeats, he smiled again.
I turned my attention to Lilly and Jasper, who were wrapped up in each other's arms as always.
"Hey guys! When did you get back?"
"Last night," Lilly answered. "We wanted to be here for your birthday, so we decided that we would take a longer honeymoon in a couple of months."
I gave them a small smile. "You didn't have to do that."
"I know, but we wanted to." She grinned.
"So, how was it?" I asked eager to hear all about the tropical paradise that Lilly had described to me over the phone during one of the few telephone calls that she made to check in.
"Wonderful," Lilly gushed. "It was so beautiful. I'll have to show you the pictures and tell you more about it later."
"Sounds like a plan." I nodded. "But you didn't have to come up to the school this morning to see me."
"Well, we just wanted to come up here in person and say happy…" Jasper began, but trailed off to a stop when he saw my glare, daring him to finish that sentence. "Never mind."
They all laughed as I nodded in satisfaction before Edward pulled me back around to face him. He lifted his free hand and traced one cool fingertip around the outside of my lips as he spoke.
"So, as discussed, I am not allowed to wish you a happy birthday either, is that correct"
"Yes, that is correct." I could never quite mimic the flow of his perfect, formal articulation. It was something that could only be picked up in an earlier century.
"Just checking." He ran his hand through his tousled bronze hair. "You might have changed you mind. Most people seem to enjoy things like birthdays and gifts."
The three listening to our conversation laughed and the sounds were all silver wind chimes of different ranges.
"Of course you'll enjoy it." Lilly insisted.
"Yeah! Everyone is supposed to be nice to you today and give you your way, Bella. What's the worst that could happen?" She meant it as a rhetorical question.
"Getting older," I answered anyway, and my voice was not as steady as I wanted it to be.
Beside me, Edward's smile tightened into a hard line.
"Eighteen isn't very old," Jasper said. "Don't women usually wait till they're twenty-nine to get upset over birthdays?"
"It's older than Edward," I mumbled.
Edward sighed.
"Technically," Lilly said, keeping her tone light. "Just by one little year, though." I could tell she was trying to make me feel better and I supposed… if I could be sure of the future I wanted, sure that I would get to spend forever with Edward, and Lilly, and Alice and the rest of the Cullen's (preferably not as a wrinkled little old lady)… then a year or two one direction or the other wouldn't matter to me so much. But Edward was dead set against any future that changed me. Any future that made me like them – that made me immortal, too.
An impasse, Edward had called it.
I couldn't really see his point, to be honest. What was so great about mortality? Being a vampire didn't look like such a terrible thing – not the way the Cullen's did it, anyway.
"What time will you be at the house?" Alice asked, changing the subject. From her expression, she was up to exactly the kind of thing I'd been hoping to avoid.
"I didn't know I had plans to be there."
"Oh, be fair, Bella!" she complained. "You aren't going to ruin all our fun like that, are you?"
"I thought my birthday was about what I want?"
"I'll get her from Charlie's right after school," Edward told her, ignoring me all together.
"I have to work," I protested.
"You don't, actually," Alice told me smugly. "I already spoke to Mrs. Newton about it. She's trading your shifts. She said to tell you 'Happy Birthday.'"
"I-I still can't come over," I stammered, scrambling for an excuse. "I, well, I haven't watched Romeo and Juliet yet for English."
Lilly snorted with a slight laugh. "You have Romeo and Juliet memorized."
Damn her and how well she knows me.
"But Mr. Birdie said we needed to see it performed to fully appreciate it – that's how Shakespeare intended it to be presented."
Edward rolled his eyes.
"You've already seen the movie," Alice accused.
"But not the nineteen-sixties version. Mr. Birdie said it was the best."
Finally, Alice lost the smug smile and glared at me. "This can be easy, or this can be hard, Bella, but one way or the other –"
Edward interrupted her threat. "Relax, Alice. If Bella wants to watch a movie, then she can. It's her birthday."
"So there," I added.
"I'll bring her over around seven," he continued. "That will give you more time to set up."
"But – " I began and all of the sudden, I felt compliant and excited about the party. What's so bad about getting a few presents and spending time with the Cullen's and enjoying a slice of cake? "Okay, fine. I'll be there."
Alice's laughter chimed again and she was bouncing on her heels as she clapped. "Yay! I'll see you tonight, Bella! It'll be fun, you'll see." She grinned – the wide smile exposed all her perfect, glistening teeth – then pecked me on the cheek and danced off toward her first class before I could say another word.
It was then that I started to feel normal again, dreading any type of celebration and not wanting to have anything to do with my birthday. I knew exactly what happened and snapped my head in Jasper's direction and narrowed my eyes as I huffed out my annoyance.
"Jasper, no fair with the mood control thing!"
"Sorry, Bella." He laughed as he and Lilly straightened themselves out from leaning against Edward's Volvo and grabbed her hand.
"Happy Birthday!" Lilly rushed out giggling before Jasper quickly pulled her away towards his black Viper.
"Can't trust a vampire," Edward smirked, "trust me."
I shook my head in silent laughter and lightly smacked him on his stomach. "Let's get going. We're going to be late for class."
(Lilly's POV)
Jasper and I sat in his Viper as we drove home from the school. He reached over and took my hand in his and pulled it to his lips and placed and gentle kiss on my knuckles over my wedding rings. I looked over and smiled at him lovingly and he grinned happily at me in return.
Our wedding was the happiest day of my life and I now understood what other women meant when they said that.
Having some of my friends and family from Canada come and stay with us during the week of the wedding was wonderful. It was so good to see Trent again. Meeting some of the Cullen's family and Jasper's friends was great. Garrett was wonderful and really made an effort to get to know me. He was funny and kind and definitely had the up most respect for Jasper.
When my parents found out that Jasper had proposed and that we were getting married, they were excited and happy for us. Anna thought the world of Dr. Cullen and respected him as a person and a doctor. John was supportive but insisted on meeting the family. He ended up getting along with everyone great and got a kick out of Emmett and enjoyed watching sports with him.
The Denali's were all great and it amused me to no end up persistent Tanya was when it came to trying to get a date with Edward. I knew that he had no interest on her, so I knew that he wouldn't have to worry about him cheating on Bella, but it was funny to see his reactions and her succubus nature in action. But they were all nice and we got along great.
During the month before the wedding, Edward wouldn't allow Bella to come to the house, because Peter, Char, and Garrett were human drinkers, not to mention Laurent came with the Denali's as well and he was having a difficult time switching diets. He had to hunt a lot before the wedding and have some animal blood on standby in the fridge during the wedding incase his thirst got too bad around the humans. Edward would have one of us with Bella the entire time from the second she came to the house the day of the wedding. So she didn't really get the chance to meet any of the Cullen's or Jasper's friends.
The reception was a blast. Jasper and I danced the night away and had fun mingling with the guests and introducing my new friends from school to my old friends from Vancouver. I couldn't have asked for a better wedding.
The honeymoon was a complete surprise and I was over the moon when Jasper revealed his surprise that he owned the island and it was now ours. It was so beautiful there and I had such a wonderful time with my husband that I didn't want to leave, but I knew that I had to be here for Bella's birthday, regardless of the fact that she was dreading her birthday.
I knew that Bella was afraid to get older and wanted to stay seventeen forever with Edward. I could understand her fears of aging and looking too old for Edward. I could understand that she wanted to be like him. Some may think that she hasn't been with him long enough to make a decision to give up everything for him, but once again, I can understand it completely. You would have to be a mated vampire to understand. She may not have the instinctual reactions to Edward as she would a vampire, nor would she feel the mating pull. But she will never find someone to love as much as she will love Edward; she will never feel complete with anyone as she does with him.
But I can also understand Edward's point of view. He hates what he is and with the beliefs that he has about his soul, he doesn't want her to be damned. He would rather stay with her through her human life and when she dies follow her than risk her damning her soul. I may not agree with how he is going about all of this, but I can understand it. He loves her that much and believes that he is doing the right thing. I know he hasn't told Bella about his beliefs yet and I'm not sure when he will tell her. I can only be there for both of them and be someone that they can talk to that won't judge them and understand where they are coming from.
As I was thinking about this, I was reminded of that night in Phoenix where I almost lost my best friend and was kidnapped by a sadistic warlord. I still think about Gillian from time to time and worry that today will be the day that he will resurface and try to take me away from my husband again. I knew that he meant it when he said that he would never give up until Japer knew the pain of losing his mate the way that Gillian lost his. Only he planned to keep me for his own under the spell of a master's bite. I knew that regardless of the fact that Gillian is immune to my gift, he would get his one way or another, even if it has to be me who does it.
I was broken out of my thoughts when Jasper stopped the car in front of the house. He parked the car and turned off the ignition before getting out of the car and flitting around to my side of the car to open my door. I have gotten used to him doing this and knew that since he was raised this way, that it was second nature. Personally, it was one of the things I loved about him; his chivalrous manner made me feel special and loved.
He held out his hand for mine and I placed my hand in his and allowed him to help me out of my seat. He then closed the door behind me and intertwined our fingers as he lead me up the porch steps and to the front door that he opened for me and then followed in behind me before closing the door.
We made our way to the living room where Esme, Emmett, and Rosalie were.
"Hey, you're back!" Esme greeted us as she unloaded the bags full of the decorations that Alice had her buy for Bella's party tonight. "How was Bella?"
"She's not too thrilled about her birthday, but she's willing to come to the party tonight." I answered as Jasper and I took a seat on the loveseat together. He pulled me closer to his side before pulling his arm around my shoulders and placing the other one on my upper thigh.
"Why isn't she happy that it's her birthday?" Emmett asked from the floor in front of Rose by her feet playing a video game as she flipped through a magazine.
"She doesn't like that she is now older than Edward. She's afraid of getting older." Jasper replied as he began to draw random patterns across the thigh where his hand was resting.
"I don't understand?" Esme pressed confused.
Jasper and I looked at each other, knowing what the other was thinking and sighed before returning our attention back to Esme, who was waiting patiently for us to reply.
"She wants to be changed, but Edward won't do it." Jasper answered for me.
"What?" Rose snapped her head up from her magazine to look up at the two of us like we had two heads.
"She doesn't want to become an old woman and then dying while the love of her life stays young and handsome forever. She wants to be changed into one of us, but Edward is afraid of damning her soul, so he won't do it." I answered, knowing that when a topic like this came around, beating around the bush is the last thing you would want to do.
"How could she?" Rose ranted.
"Rose," Esme chastised.
"No! How could she want to be one of us? How could she give up her chance at being a mother? How could she give up her opportunity at a normal life? How could she give up something that I had always dreamed about?" She continued on.
"Rosie, baby, please calm down." Emmett pleaded as he forgot about his game and attempted to tend to his mate. She sobbed tearlessly as Emmett enveloped her in to his arms and rocked her as he attempted to calm her down.
Jasper, Esme and I looked at each other sympathetically before we decided to give Emmett and Rosalie some space to calm down. It was then that I knew that this was going to be a difficult night, not only for Bella, but for some of the other members of our family as well.
A/N: What does everyone think? I thought that I would give you all a better understanding of Bella and how much she wants to be changed.
Also, I promise that there is going to be a lot more Lilly/Jasper than in Dhampir, but it is important for the story to show Bella/Edward's POV and how this story differs from SM's. There are a lot of similarities in the first story, but there are going to be even more differences in the sequel than in New Moon. It's mainly going to be featuring Lilly/Jasper's relationship with some Bella in the mix with even less Edward. This might not make that much sense right now, but I promise that once this story gets going a good amount in to it, you will understand what I mean.
If anyone has any questions or comments, feel free to post them in my reviews and I will answer them in my next Author's Note!
Check out my other stories!
'Attempting to Covet'
'Dhampir'
'Far Fetched Realities'
'Mirror Image'
'Other Worldly Beauty'
'Perplexing Revelations'
'Pretexting'
'The Heart's Desire' NEW!
'The Major'
'Twilight ReVAMPed'
If you enjoyed this story so far, check out some of my other stories on my FanFiction page! Also, I am still accepting Twilight stories that involve Jasper/any female leads or Bella/selected male leads if anyone is looking for a Beta Reader. I will make exceptions on the characters depending on the plot. I am also now accepting Phantom of the Opera FanFictions that include Erik! I will also be accepting Titanic FanFictions featuring Jack, and Law and Order SVU that feature Elliot. PM me for details!
- Bella'Xo
Xo BellaItalia oX