I need to feel something…something that will keep me in control of something. Seeing as I can't fucking control who I love or this werewolf thing. More like werewolf shit. And the worse thing is that I can't tell anyone how I feel. I hate having no one to tell…or having no one to ask for advice- cause all my friends are in love…and even though I feel like shit- I'm Seth. And I can't bring my friends down. I need pain. I crave it- I need it almost as much as I need someone to love me. But no one can love me, cause apparently I'm unlovable.

I walked down to Emily's house- the pack was gathering there to talk about some kind of shit. And it sucks, because I have to put on my fake 'everything will be okay' face on. Kill me now.

"Sethy. How you been?" It was Collin. That fucking traitor.

"I've been great, dude. Isn't it a beautiful morning?" I said back- trying my very hardest to smile. (It also took my hardest to not say, "It's been terrible you freaking moron.")

"Your so weird, man." Thank god, silence. The less talking, the better. We walked in silence till we reached Emily's door. Collin turned to me. "You sure you're alright?" Shit. I think he's on to me…

"Yeah. I'm cool, just tired." Pulled that one out of my ass. He better stop asking questions…Collin just looked at me and shook his head. He knocked, and then walked in, with me following him like a fucking puppy.

"CONGRATS!" We heard as we walked into the kitchen. Shit. There was a freaking banner- CONGRATULATIONS COLLIN. All the guys from the pack were there, and they all slapped Collin on the back. What the hell are they, football players- jeez. Anyway, I just sat in the corner being quiet. And watching it all. God this sucks. Sam just stared at me. What the fuck.

"Seth." Sam said in a voice that stopped all of the conversation in the room.

"Yeahh?" Everyone was staring at me.

"You alright?" Jesus, now the whole pack is gonna be worried…I gotta think up a lie.

"Uh, yeah man. I'm cool." Wow Seth, great lie.

"Tell me the truth." He used his alpha voice.

"Fuck…" I blurted out. That must have been out of my 'character' or some shit like that cause the pack was frozen in place, shocked. Oh fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck

"Seth…" Sam breathed. I sat up and was out the door in a second.

This is a story I have been working on forever. There's many more chapters to come. Please review. I LOVE YOU ALL