Itachi took his plate and quickly emptied it into the sink, not bothering to clean it.
"Sasuke, are you alright?" he asked the hundredth time.
Sasuke nodded, rubbing his eyes, hand sticking to his hair.
"Maybe you should take a shower," Itachi told him, helping him unstick his hand. Itachi hadn't yet touched him that morning, and the feel was strangely revolting yet inviting. It was revolting because he could remember, from his "dream" that those hands had done such evil. But they were also inviting, because though Sasuke was keen to believe he'd done such horrible acts, he was also keen to find any reason to forget those acts, to believe they'd never even happened. And maybe they were just a dream...maybe...
"I don't want to take a shower," Sasuke whined. It was true. What if this world was a dream? What if he only had so long to enjoy it?
Itachi laughed. "You have to, Sasuke," he said. "Can you train like that?"
"Train?" Sasuke questioned.
Itachi grinned. "Yep. You know how you always wanted me to help you perfect that shuriken jutsu?"
Sasuke's eyes widened. Oh, yes, oh yes, oh yes. He'd perfected it on his own, without Itachi, after the massacre, but perhaps that hadn't happened and he still needed Itachi to teach him. Yes, it was only his need to learn it, that was the reason he so urgently wanted Itachi to teach him...
But he still didn't want to shower.
Still, in order to train with his older brother, he would have to. He scuttled off to the bathroom, and on his way bumped into his mother once more.
She was an angel, to him. So beautiful...and she had always taken wonderful care of him. He smiled up at her, grinning uncontrollably. He was just so happy.
"What would you like to do tonight, Sasuke?" she asked him, stroking his cheek. "Go out?"
Sasuke shook his head. "No, a night in is fine," he assured her. And it was. He wanted to stay home...if he left, then came back, it might not be the same.
"Whatever you want to do, honey," she said, starting down the hall again. "Just shower, and get that syrup out of your hair. You need to be squeaky clean on your special day."
Oh, what a special day indeed.
--
The shower was nice and hot. There was no other shower like it, Sasuke knew. That shower head, after the massacre, was discontinued by the company, even though to Sasuke nothing could compare. The water had been shut off in the Uchiha compound days after that horrible day, so Sasuke couldn't enjoy it any longer. Memories flooded back to him strongly as he watched the water cascade down his body. One, in particular, he had forgotten, perhaps on purpose.
He remembered it because when he was looking down at his body, covered with that cute baby fat he hated, he could only think of how he wished he had a body like Itachi's; built, muscular. It looked strong, and not only that, it got girls' attention. They were always looking at Itachi, giggling to each other, no doubt wondering if they had a chance with him, though he never gave them a second look. Sasuke had never been interested in girls--when he was older (if that had happened) he'd only ever been interested in his goal, so he never noticed girls, even if they were swooning over him. But even still, he doubted he had gotten as many adoring girls as Itachi must have.
The memory that came to him was this. Once, when the family went out to eat on a rare occasion, Father had noticed those girls staring at him in the little outdoor restaurant.
"Would you look at them, Itachi?" he snickered, almost childishly. "You should ask one out, you know."
Itachi looked at them and shrugged. "I'll have more time when I'm older. I'm focusing more on my training."
Father shook his head. "Man, when I was your age..."
Itachi sighed. "Alright, Father," he said. "I'll take one out. But just one."
But after two dates with this one girl, he gave it up. Itachi had never explained why, but Sasuke knew. He'd overheard their argument. The girl had been complaining that he wasn't much of a talker, and whenever he did talk, he'd only ever talk about his little brother, and how much he wished they could do more together. The girl was jealous. Of Sasuke.
Sasuke, after the massacre, had always believed that Itachi had known he was there, that he would hear that argument, and had done so to trick him into believing he was a caring older brother. But now, maybe it was true. Maybe he did care, maybe he did want to be a good brother, to take care of him, to play with him.
Sasuke hurried, even though the intoxicating feel of the shower made him want to just fall asleep then and there. He stepped out and dressed himself, making sure to put on his training clothes, but look nice--it was a special day, after all. He combed his hair--having forgotten how soft it had once been--and brushed his small baby teeth, amazed at how little he was. He'd never had a dream effect him so, make him truly believe for more than five minutes that it had been true. And this troubled him.
He stepped out of the shower, pulling a hand through his hair. Itachi was waiting for him outside, stretching in the morning light.
"Ready?" he asked.
Sasuke nodded eagerly.
On the way to the training area, Itachi asked him, "So, how does being eight feel?"
Sasuke stared at the ground, slowly moving beneath his sandaled feet. He didn't really know, honestly. He felt older than eight. He felt twelve. He felt all those years beneath his belt--not only eight, but nine, ten, eleven.
"I don't know," he whispered, almost fearfully. How could you not know?
Itachi smiled knowingly. "I understand. Sometimes it takes a little while to feel older. I mean, you've only been eight for a day. Not even. It will come soon."
Sasuke nodded absently. Yes, that's it. That's definitely it.
It has to be.
The training ground was just as he remembered it--it hadn't changed a bit, as far as he could remember. He hadn't been there in at least a year.
No, Sasuke, only a few days ago. Yesterday, even. You were there yesterday.
Itachi stepped up to the starting zone. "Well?" he asked. "You want me to show you it again, or do you want to try yourself?"
Sasuke shook his head. "You start."
Itachi nodded, and picked up his kunai knives. He aligned himself perfectly, and then, was gone.
Only, he wasn't gone. Sasuke could remember being amazed at Itachi, at how fast he could do this, at how perfectly. His eyes hadn't been able to follow him.
Only, now, he could. He could see his movements, anticipate them. He knew them, he knew he'd done them before.
Itachi landed, having aced all the targets. He smiled at Sasuke. "Your turn."
Sasuke, wobbly, took the kunai from him. Itachi patted him on the back reassuringly. "I know you can do it, Nii-chan."
But...but...I know this, Sasuke thought, unsure of himself. Haven't I done this before?
Sasuke stared at the mound before him. He couldn't force his legs to move. He didn't want to do this. For, what if he did it perfectly? If he did, that meant he had done it before...that this was a dream.
He didn't want it to be a dream.
Sasuke dropped the kunai knives. "You know, I don't think I'm up to it today," Sasuke said quietly.
Itachi raised his eyebrows. "But I thought you were obsessed with it."
"Yeah, but...I don't know, my leg kinda hurts from the other day...and...I got bit by this bug, and I haven't been feeling too good since then..." Sasuke tried to think of anything he could to get out of this tricky situation.
Itachi put a hand to his forehead. "You don't have a fever," he informed him, eyes searching his face.
Sasuke hoped against hope that he would just take his answer and leave it at that.
Itachi sighed. "Alright, Sasuke," he said. "It's your birthday. But what do you want to do?"
Sasuke almost didn't catch himself as he almost sighed in utter relief. "I-I don't know," he mumbled. "Ummm..."
Itachi winked at Sasuke and gave him a sly look. "Wanna go spy on people in the village?"
For a boy of such reverence as Itachi--being the ANBU Black Ops Squad Commander by the age of thirteen--this was a childish and immature thing to suggest. But Itachi had always been strangely honest with Sasuke--even if, at times, he was secretive--and Sasuke loved it.
"Yeah!" he said. Of course he wanted to. He'd always had great fun spying on people with Itachi--Itachi had always been so good at it, and always knew things about people that Sasuke had never thought about--and sometimes intuitively grasped things that Sasuke couldn't even fathom. It fascinated him.
"Well, let's go, shall we?" Itachi laughed.
And they did.