The support has been overwhelming, thank you all so much. I hope you like this one, and leave reviews, I love reading your thoughts! Also, the chapter 1 has been re updated, due to some errors I fould and corrected.

THIS FANFIC TOUCHES TOPICS SUCH AS DEPRESSION, DRUGS, SUICIDE ATTEMPTS AND IS HEAVILY CENTERED IN ASPERGERS SYNDROME. You've been warned.

Chapter 2:

The new Bellas were Beca, Emily, Fat Amy, Stacie, Cynthia-Rose, Flo, Jessica, Ashley and Lilly. Emily was a innocent, good and perky brunette who composed music too, Fat Amy was a funny and sarcastic blonde Australian, Stacie was a sexy, beautiful girl, who danced very well and also loved sex and parties, Cynthia-Rose was a black, gay, girl, with an amazing voice and composing abilities, Flo was a Latina dancer, very short, like Beca, and sexy, Jessica was a blonde with a really beautiful voice, very nice with everyone and very friendly, Ashley was a brunette that was funny and perky, and Lilly was an Asian girl who knew beat-boxing, spoke really low except when singing, and danced pretty good, so at the end, Chloe and Aubrey were pretty satisfied. Beca was happy too, although she got a bit anxious when they had to get together, and unusually quiet, afraid of ruining the only group of friends, and the only friends, she had ever had, so she tried to speak only when strictly necessary, laugh when the others did even if she didn't understand why, and just limit herself to her job. She really liked those girls, after all, so she also decided to avoid being the weirdo for once in her life by not telling anyone she had aspergers, which also required making up really good excuses to, once a week, miss the morning rehearsal of Saturday's to go to her weekly appoint with her therapist.

"Beca, you came!" Aubrey said one day when Beca came back from therapy one Saturday to the auditorium, that day the rehearsal was a three hours one, so she arrived to the last hour of rehearsal. Breathless, Beca left her laptop's suitcase on top of the piano and joined the girls, who were learning the mix Beca had prepared.

"I told you I'd be here as soon as possible" Beca said taking a paper with the lyrics and notes from Chloe's hands.

"Where were you, by the way?" Stacie asked.

"I had to go buy some books for class" Beca lied. The good part about aspergers was she always spoke in the same voice and tone, and almost never looked at anyone in the eye, so there was nothing suspicious if she didn't do it that time either.

"But you never come on Saturdays, why don't you free them in the mornings knowing we always have rehearsal?" Aubrey asked nicely.

"It's true, last Saturday you had a dentist appointment" Ashley said "and the one before, what was? Your laptop broke and you had to go get it fixed? And then, the one before, I believe your dad had a leak and you had to go help him, or something like that."

"And as you can see, those aren't things I can possibly plan. There are just some crap that by coincidence, happens every Saturday morning, but I do keep them free" Beca calmly said. She was too intelligent to even think that nobody could ever catch her lies.

"That's true" Emily said, giving Beca a tiny smile "bad luck gets to all of us. But she's here now, so why don't we keep rehearsing?"

They rehearsed for a while, and then gave the rehearsal by finished and Aubrey and Chloe called them to talk.

"We have something important. We want to invite you all to come live with us in the Bella's house near the Campus." Aubrey said excitedly.

"It's a tradition, and there are rooms enough for everyone, people would only have to share with one person, and it will be fun" Chloe added grinning. All the girls showed excitement about it except for Beca, who felt actual sweat on her back "Don't you like the idea, Beca?"

"Is not that I don't like it" Beca said, honestly, because it really sounded like fun… for a normal person "is just that living with people is not my thing. I don't even live with my father, is just not my thing."

"Oh, that's too bad" Chloe, for a normal person, would have seemed sad, but for Beca, she noticed any difference "Well, I'll give you the direction anyway in case you feel like visiting some time, alright?"

"Okay." Beca nodded and accepted a piece of paper where Chloe had quickly written the address.

"Hey, the Trebles are hosting a huge party tonight at their house, why don't we all go?" Stacie said while looking at her cell. Everyone agreed and then Beca shook her head "Come on Beca! Don't be a boring old lady!"

"Yeah Beca, you haven't come to a single party with us yet!" Cynthia added "Don't you like us enough to go out with us?"

"That's…" Beca rose a finger in the air but put her hand down, not knowing what to say "Of course I like you all, hell, I wish you all were my friends, but I just don't like parties. It has nothing to do with you, it's just who I am, and if you don't like it, then I'm sorry but I can't apologize for being me." Beca said in her all-time monotonous tone.

"It's okay Beca" Chloe smiled nicely "hey, why don't we do something you like?"

"It's very kind of you Chloe, but the things I like can't be done by eleven girls at the same time; reading, playing piano, making mixes… but it's alright. You all go and have fun, I'll go have my own fun." Beca replied with the same blank expression she always had.

"Come on Beca, come with us" Emily said friendly "I promise it'll be fun, and if you don't like it, you can always leave. Just give it a try."

"Yeah, you've never come to a party with us, it'll be the best party you've ever been at" Jessica added with a smile, and Beca shut herself instead of telling her she had actually never been at a party.

"They're right you know?" Aubrey added "you can always come back if you don't like it, but you might as well love it, and then, you'd have something to do with us apart from singing and dancing."

"Come shorty! I'll be super fun!" Fat Amy elbowed her friendly and Beca eyed them seriously. She didn't want to go. She didn't believe it could be fun. But she wanted so desperately to fit in, and wanted to believe them so bad, she nodded "Yey! Let's go, Aca-Bitches!"

She walked at the end of the group behind the others, trying not to have a panic attack from all the social anxiety she started feeling, a feeling that increased with each step she walked towards the Trebles' house, but tried to keep it cool. The house was filled with people dancing, getting drunk, and doing silly stuff, and music was very loud but very much her kind of music, there was also a pool, and a lot of drinks. Beca didn't drink because she knew it was bad for her liver and thought drinking was stupid, completely stupid, and for the same reason, she didn't smoke either.

"Beca!" not ten minutes into the party, Jesse Swanson approached her with a huge grin. Beca had never had a single friend in her life, except for Jesse, who had been her friend ever since they were two years old in kindergarten. He had been there before she, when having ten years old, was diagnosed with aspergers syndrome, and he had never left her side. Beca, however, still had aspergers, which meant she didn't quite understand yet the need of communication a friendship required, so she almost never texted him or anyone, let alone call, and had forgotten he had texted her saying he was a Treble and was in her same college, studying music and business, and he had to be there. Beca smiled happily hugging him strongly. He was the only person she ever hugged, even though they barely did it. Jesse had tried his best to help Beca, and she was less socially awkward than what she could have been without him, but being him a boy and not a girl, there were many things they couldn't help each other with or do together. However, Jesse was very good and patient with her "What are you doing here?"

"I joined the Bellas, and they were coming" Beca replied.

"You wanted to fit in, uh?" Jesse looked at her proudly "That's an awesome effort."

"I guess… listen, this parties aren't so bad, right? The music is pretty good."

"Yeah, and the food is good. We can just chill together like we did at our graduation party last June!" Jesse said excitedly "You don't have to worry, they aren't that bad, and if you get bored, we'll go to your dorm and listen to your mixes until the morning."

"Okay" Beca smiled a bit and eyed his cup "Jesse…"

"What did we say about just letting people be even if they are trying to kill themselves?"

"I know. I just don't get it, Jesse, you are happy, healthy, have great marks, why would you hurt yourself on purpose?"

"I don't drink enough to really hurt myself Beca, that's not what I want. We drink because, even though for some people is not like that, for some like us, we genuinely like how it tastes, it's like why people eat beef if it's bad for the heart? Everything is always bad for something, Beca, but we sometimes have to choose happiness over strict health, after all, we are all going to die one day, so we might as well live happy until then, than always worrying about the unavoidable." Jesse explained patiently, while they walked into the house and sat comfortably on the couch with their drinks –Beca took water- not paying much attention to a couple that was passionately making up in front of them "Get a room!" he snapped to the couple, who got up slightly embarrassed and ran away "So, how are things going with the Bellas?"

"Fine, they like my mixes" Beca replied.

"It's awesome how even knowing about your aspergers, they still want to be your friends" Jesse said with a smile.

"That's because they don't know" Beca said "And you are not going to tell anybody, aren't you?"

"Of course not Beca, that's your privacy" Jesse shrugged "but I think it's best if they know."

"If they knew, Jesse, they would know for sure how weird and different I exactly am, they would stick to the popular idea of aspergers, and Google it maybe, only to be afraid of me, or find me a disgusting weirdo, a monster, and then, they'll go, like everyone else. And I'm sick of being so alone all the time."

Jesse looked sadly at her, but said nothing and just nodded a bit. The couple hung out for an hour, until Beca decided it was her time to go to sleep, and Jesse decided to take her to her dorm to make sure she arrived safely. On their way out of the house, however, they found Chloe making out heavily with some guy that had her pinned against a wall, kissing her neck eliciting some moans and keeping a hand under her blouse and on her boob, and another on her ass. Beca, without thinking it twice, went to them and with a surprising strength for such a tiny girl, pulled the boy back from the back of his t-shirt's neck with her right hand, and with the left one, punched the boy in the face has hard as possible. Everyone around them fell into silence looking at them, impressed, laughing or making a video.

"That's not the proper way to treat a lady like her, you piece of shit!" Beca, who never rose her voice, yelled to the guy, who was too impressed to care. Chloe, however, recovered quickly from the shock and, blushing, pierced Beca with her eyes, so angry her hair seemed like flames.

"What the fuck are you doing Beca? Tom is my boyfriend!"

"We should go Beca" Jesse said quickly.

"Well, he shouldn't be don't you think?" Beca ignored Jesse. She had recovered her usual monotonous, cold tone of voice, and her calmness and indifference "And what are you, a whore? A lady should never let a boyfriend treat them like that Chloe, he could give you some illness, or leave you pregnant, or just be using you like many people do Chloe, and this is no place for making out like that, only whores do that. And what is he? Dude, you seriously think rubbing your toner against your girlfriend and getting her half naked in the middle of a party against a dirty wall is romantic? You both are pretty irresponsible."

"Beca!" Jesse tried to intervene.

"Beca, you are just eighteen, who do you think you are to tell us, seniors in our twenties, how to be with our partners?" Chloe said rising her tone in anger "Calling me a whore? What are you, Einstein? You know nothing about couples, or love!"

"You fully well know I am not Einstein, but that's another topic I'll explain in another occasion. Come on Chloe, you know you may be older but I'm a hundred times more intelligent than half Barden University if not all, you think getting drunk and trying to get your boyfriend to fuck you against a wall is intelligent? It's seems pretty dumb to me, absolutely stupid really, he could have not used a condom and you wouldn't even realize!"

"Beca, stop!" Jesse tried to stop her again.

"You don't seem to be intelligent enough to see how messed up you are, weirdo" Chloe snapped "You've called me a whore and a stupid person, without even mentioning what you just did here, how have you embarrassed us, and what you've called my boyfriend. You have three seconds to put up a fucking good apologize Beca."

"I am not wrong, Chloe" Beca snapped back "If you were more intelligent, you would see. You want to know why am I such a weirdo? Because Hawking was. And Mozart, Newton, Galileo, Marie Curie, Aristotle. They were all weirdos and they were all some of the greatest people ever alive. You are mediocre compared to them." Beca simply explained and looked at everyone else "You are all. Dumb assholes."

That said, she shrugged, holding her tears back, and started walking away, followed closely by Jesse.

"Don't fucking talk to me ever again Beca!" Chloe shouted to them "If you think that's what a friend does, you are very wrong and I don't want to be your friend!" Other people had also just realized Beca had insulted them, and were starting to shout rude stuff to her. Fortunately, only Jesse knew were her dorm was, so he took her there, and once they arrived, Beca sat on the floor and started crying heavily, her hands holding her forehead with such a pressure the knuckles were white, her elbows on her knees.

Jesse sat beside her, not touching her because that only seemed to upset her more, but just being there, until she stopped crying, crossed her arms over her knees, and rested her head there, looking at Jesse with her eyes barely open, her face red from crying, and her throat sore. She felt like her heart had been ripped apart, and she had too many mixed feelings and confusion, she just understood nothing.

"Chloe is right, though" she said with raspy voice "My IQ is 163, and I know nothing about social skills, emotions in others, need to be touchy, and many, many other things. I'm incredibly intelligent and I've tried to commit suicide five times in my life. Do you think dumbest people are the happiest ones?"

"I think the people that have the most things, have more to learn to control, more stuff to manage and keep in order. Like a computer, is much harder to build and keep clean and like new, and it will break easier than a simple book." Jesse said, and started massaging Beca's scalp with his fingertips, making the girl close her eyes. In certain times, Beca would let people get caring with her, but only if she was really desperate to feel better, enough to try something she didn't understand. "You really messed things up, Beca. If they made a video, everyone will hate you tomorrow, you need to be careful. And you really need to apologize to Chloe."

"Don't worry, I'll stay here. I already know what they are teaching me and classes are too boring, I will just stay here until everybody forgets. Maybe it's better that the whole campus hates me, they'll pretend I don't exist, I'll have all the peace and quiet to work on my mixes."

"Beca… look, I won't argue now that we are both tired, but you will get out of the cave and apologize to her tomorrow."

"But I don't understand Jesse, I stopped her from doing something really stupid that could have gotten her in serious trouble."

"I know, and she does, but all she sees now is that you, her friend, called her a stupid whore, called everyone stupid, acted like a know it all embarrassing her in front of everybody, acted like an egocentric bitch, messed with her boyfriend… do you need more reasons to apologize? Just tell her that's not what you wanted to happen."

"Alright" Beca nodded tiredly "I still don't really understand what I did wrong."

"Just think about this like one more thing your little problem will make it hard for you to understand. You'll understand better with some time, but the apologizes need to happen quickly."

"Okay. Thanks dude" Beca got up "Come on, get back to bed. I need to sleep."

"I can stay make you company while you sleep."

"No" Beca shook her head "I really want to be alone. See you tomorrow."

It took a while, but finally Beca crossed and locked the door behind Jesse, went to the windows, and closed the curtains. She was about to pretend she didn't exist for maybe a month, until people cooled down. The Bellas wouldn't probably want her back anyway, but they had her mixes and work and could win at Regionals in a couple weeks without her.

Then, Beca sat in her bed and started crying again, and then, in the deepest parts of a drawer, she found a bottle of gin she bought for her father long ago and forgot to give him, and started drinking it from the bottle while crying. Maybe she really should become invisible. Maybe the world was better off without her.