Rip Out The Wings
DaggersBloodPain
Chapter Two
Breaking the Habit
Harry could not believe what he just heard. The Headmaster really and truly was just using him. Their was no other explanation to what had just happened. The old manipulator and finally shown his true colors, and he couldn't have chosen a worse time to do it, because now the most powerful wizard on the Light side was royally pissed off at him.
It is not that Harry was thrilled with the fact he was a girl and wanted to immediately go through the hassle of assuming his true form, it was the opposite actually. The thing that was pissing him off was that he was given no choice!
His whole life had been run by people who thought they knew what was best. They had done a pretty good job of screwing it up so far. He had nearly died every year since he started at Hogwarts and many before that! The Dursleys were no picnic and no wizard had ever checked up on him, and if they had they had left him in that Hell hole anyway. They had gotten people killed in front of his eyes, Hell he had killed a person when he was eleven years old. No one had even brought it up since, but it was his touch on Quirrell's skin that had killed his old Professor and he knew it. If it weren't for Harry he would still be alive, but Voldemort would have risen too soon and much stronger. It was a justifiable murder but it was still killing.
The Light side was not looking so light anymore. They put blood on the hands of a child and didn't even bother to help him clean it off. They just patted him on the head, told him he did a good job, and sent him back to Hell. It was the same story for every year and he was just plain sick of it. Maybe it was time to make his own decisions.
He could not do this alone, it would be too overwhelming to do it without help. He did not have a long list of people that he was willing to ask for help. Even less of those had the power to help him with this.
First of all it had to be an adult, they needed to have full access to their magic to try and get the charms/potions off of him to reveal his true self. He thought Hermione might be able to do it, but she wouldn't know where to start, and was restrained in where she could look for information.
Second, they had to have alliances that put them a fair distance from Dumbledore's pocket. He needed whoever helped him to be able to stand with him against the Headmaster when the time came to continue his education.
Third and probably the hardest condition was he had to trust them. He had precious little trust in people, especially adult authority figures, that letting go and trusting this person to do what needed to be done and stop before going too far was just next to impossible.
The first condition eliminated all of his friends except for Hagrid, he was much too noticeable for something like this, and the last half of the first condition immediately disqualified him as he was not allowed to practice magic. The second condition eliminated all of the older Weasleys. Dumbledore had done a lot for their family, they would stick together rather than risk it all to help him, a stray who just wandered in and put them in danger over and over again. Professor McGonagall was out, she was too much a stickler for the rules, if she felt it was her duty to inform the Headmaster of his plans she would do it without consulting him. Madame Pomfrey was a possibility but Harry cared too much for the kindly nurse to make her risk what she had going for her.
The third condition only left two people still breathing that could help him. One of which he was unsure if he would be willing to help at all. Remus was a strong possibility, he was magically powerful enough and had done enough research to know how to help, and he trusted him with his life. The werewolf had saved him from jumping through the veil after Sirius and Harry wasn't about to forget that anytime soon. There was only one thing that made him a bad choice. He was still recovering from Sirius's death himself, Harry was not sure how he would handle the news his best friend's son wasn't who he thought he was. The last thing Harry wanted to do was cause him pain.
The last and final option was Harry's least favorite but actually had the best shot of succeeding. There was one adult who had the magic and knowledge to help, the murky allegiance needed, and his trust. The problem was this one hated his guts. Yet not ten minutes ago he had been defending him against the Headmaster.
That probably had more to do with the Professor's shock at his astute comments. Whether or not Snape would help him defy the Headmaster directly was something he wasn't positive about. Something instinctual told him even if he wouldn't help he might keep his attempts quiet so he could look for other options without worrying about looking behind his shoulder at every turn.
Now just how was he supposed to go about asking him without getting some nasty potion slipped into his pumpkin juice? There had to be a way, but it was alluding him. After all how would you like it if the son of your school day rival wanted you to risk your very life and freedom to help him?
A letter? No, too easy to intercept. Detention? Viable but he would rather avoid that if he could, he wanted Snape in the best mood possible and getting him riled up was not the way to do it. Just suck it up already and go talk to him? That sounded way too rash even for his Gryffindor side to handle. His Slytherin side would way prefer a softer approach but there didn't seem to be a subtle way to go about it, maybe this once his impulsive side was right.
With that thought he headed down towards the dungeons and Snape's office. Hopefully the Professor was there after their meeting with the headmaster. Harry was just glad Potions had been his last class period of the day or this overly brave stunt would not be workable.
The door to Snape's office was the most menacing thing in Harry's life at the time when he finally reached it. He was about to get the answer to his problem or the rejection of his life, and he really wasn't sure which one he was going for. Taking a deep breath he raised his hand and knocked solidly three times; then stood back to wait for a response.