UltraTerror, Part Two:

And so the gang went up to the gate. A large lobster in black armor stood there.

Sheen mouth dropped open in amazement. "Look! Its Lobster Lord, from episode 673, the Lobster Lord of Lake Lazlo!" Sheen whipped out his autograph book and asked for an autograph. Lobster Lord signed it, they bought their tickets, and went inside.

Upon entering Sheen said "I haven't died but I've gone to heaven!

"Hey, that's my line!" Carl said.

Inside the convention center was 300,000 square feet of Ultralord. Booths and merchandise lined the floor, posters and props lined the walls, and a great Ultralord banner hung from the ceiling. People crowded the floor, most of them wearing Ultralord masks. Sheen took out his mask and put it on.

"Sheen," Jimmy said, "I had no idea there were so many Ultralord fans."

"Yeah." Cindy said. "I thought Sheen was the only doofus that liked that lame show."

"Are you kidding?" Sheen said in astonishment. "Ultralord is the number four show on earth, ages 11 through 15, male population! It's the number one show in seven countries! Look! Look! It's the Scorpion King, from episode number 715, the Battle for Scorpia!"

Sheen got another autograph and they went to look at the booths.

"I've been saving months for this!" Sheen smiled, picking up an Ultralord nosehair trimmer. "Dad gave me 10 for my birthday, Grandma gave me 10 too, and I have a whopping 40 from when we worked at McSpanky's! Look! Ultralord toenail clippers! Next year's Ultralord calendar! A Clamhopper wallet! An Ultralord and Robofiend snowglobe! An Ultralord coffee mug!"

"Sheen, you're too young to drink coffee" Libby said.

"Yeah," Cindy said "and he sure doesn't need any more caffeine!"

"An Ultralord lunchbox! A plush Fur Person! An Ultralord bumper sticker! If only I had a car! Jimmy, you can put it on your rocket!"

"I already have a bumper sticker." Jimmy said. " 'This vehicle brakes for spatial anomalies.' "

"Ooo! Look!" Sheen continued. "An Ultralord eyebrow plucker."

"Sheen," Carl said. "You don't have any eyebrows."

"That's why they have Ultralord bionic artificial eyebrows!"

"Sheen, there's a ton of stuff here" Jimmy said.

"Yeah, it reminds me of your room Sheen," Carl noted.

"You can't afford it all," Jimmy continued "you should look around first, not buy the first thing you see."

Sheen set down a Baby Ultralord pacifier with a sigh. "Yeah, you're probably right Jimmy."

And so they walked up and down the aisles. They saw Ultralord waffle makers and Ultralord litter boxes, Ultralord teeth whitening kits and Ultralord megamuscle dumbbells, Ultralord pillows and Ultralord toothbrushes. Sheen met Harrison Schnord, the author of "Ultralord, Defender of the Galaxy" and Hezekial Perrywinkle, author of "Robofiend, a Biography." Sheen thumbed through "The Complete Idiots Guide to Ultralord."

"Wow, I could have written this book!" Sheen exclaimed.

"You sure could have," Cindy said "you're a complete idiot."

Libby laughed in spite of herself. "I'm sorry Sheen!"

They all signed up for an Ultralord raffle. The prizes were the Ultralord soundtrack on CD for third place, signed by the artists. An autographed framed picture of Ultralord for second place. And an authentic Ultralord mask used in the series for first.

"You gotta promise you'll give me your prize if you win though," Sheen said.

"Sure thing Sheen," Libby told him.

"Depends how much you pay me," Cindy said.

They went to the Ultracafe for lunch and had decaf lattes and hero sandwiches, followed by nitrogen bars for dessert. Carl ate three of them and bought some to take home.

"I had no idea nitrogen tasted so delicious!" Carl said.

"It may have had some nitrogen in it, Carl, but I think they're mostly chocolate." Jimmy said.

"Oh." Carl said. "That's good too!"

They went into a small theater to see a preview of the next season, a selection of outtakes and bloopers, and best of all a coming attraction for the next Ultralord movie, "Ultralord Eight, Return of the Ferocious Fiends from Fentax Five." Sheen was weak in the knees upon exiting.

"That was awesome! Did you see those special effects? And when Ultralord grabbed that Fiend and used his Ion Ray on him at point blank range! WOW! I can't wait!"

"Having fun Cindy?" Libby asked.

"Well, let me think." Cindy said. "No!"

"Ah, I saw you smiling in that theater," Libby said. "And you laughed when the Maneating Manhunter slipped and fell off the cliff and into the giant Purple Pudding Volcano. You can't fool me."

Cindy looked embarrassed. "Well, that was pretty funny."

"Ladies and gentlemen and Ultrafans," came an announcement over the public address system, "now appearing for photographs in the middle of the convention center, Ultralord! Ultralady! And Robofiend!"

Sheen passed out.