September 25
What happened to middle school? No homework on Fridays and... well.. no working? I miss it. Actually doing work in school makes me want to shoot myself.
Well, besides that... Cindy is taunting me because she's a senior and only has this last year left, while I have four. Bitch. She keeps giving me the same weird looks Mo is giving me in English- she brought her boyfriend over the other day, some cute- um. His name was Josh anyways. He's sort of a geek, and the whole time I was trying to talk to him Cindy was giving me this LOOK. And giggling. I DON'T UNDERSTAND! What is it with girls?
Mom won't buy me Advil anymore. She says I don't need it, all the bruises are gone. But I still HURT. Fuck. Where am I going to get it now? I don't have money. I don't get an allowance and I can't find anyone who'll hire a fourteen year old. (Yeah, I know I said I was fifteen... My birthday is in November. Close enough.) FUCK. I need aspirin... My head hurts.
Jack smiled at me. Well, okay, he smiled in my general direction. Which is an improvement! I sit two seats in front of him, so it's hard not to get caught staring. But I manage. I'm a determined person.
... I need to stop this. Seriously. This is the shit my dad kicked my ass for before we got rid of him. And that any of the footballers would, too, if they knew I was thinking it...
There is seriously nothing to do around here, and I hate to admit it but I'm lonely. Mo is my only friend, and sometimes (on a good day) I don't mind my sister... Maybe I just need a girlfriend? I mean I am a teenaged boy and I'm starting to think I'm just constantly horny because it doesn't matter how many times I get off I still feel overly-hormonal. And a girlfriend... Yeah. That'd kill like, three birds with one stone!
Alright, I'm off to hunt down a girl who's willing to help me reaffirm my heterosexuality. Adios.
(Isn't Spanish hot? I opted to take tech this year instead of a language but DAMN it turns me on.)
~ Mark