Chapter 2: Feelings Untold

Giles suddenly found himself downstairs, in the kitchen, sitting across from Dawn. Neither of them had spoken a word since they had walked down from the top of the stairs. Dawn seemed to follow his every move as he sipped on a cup of tea he had made. He sighed as he ran a hand through his hair, before looking back up at Dawn, in her classic, arms across the chest, and eyes looking like they were trying to read your soul, and what your intentions where posture. He looked down at his tea, and became the first to speak up.

"Dawn, you said we needed to talk, yet you haven't spoken a word. Now, what is it that's on your mind?"

Dawn huffed at him as she ran her fingers through her hair, before looking back over at him. How could she put into words what she was feeling? She did not know how to say what she was thinking, or feeling. God was this all really happening or was it just some part of an old nightmare, that she kept reliving in her head repeatedly and over again. She felt a tear slip down her face, as she rubbed it, to see the worry in Giles' aged green eyes.

"Giles….I want you to tell me the truth. I saw something last night…something I did not really like. Something that disturbed me and it was in your eyes….."

She was practically sobbing now. She was worried about her sister. What would he do to her? Would Giles want to be with Buffy? Buffy was too young for him, and Buffy saw him like a father, not someone she could spend the rest of his life with.. It just wasn't right. Nevertheless, if anyone deserved to be happy, and loved, it was Giles. She loved him more than she loved any of the men that had come along in Buffy's life. Maybe they would be the perfect couple. Maybe Giles would be someone who could take care of her sister, and love her for the rest of her life. Nevertheless, Dawn was not psychic, she did not know how the others would accept a romantic relationship between Buffy and Giles, and Dawn was not even sure if she would approve. All she knew was that she loved the both of them.

"And what would that be Dawn?"

Giles asked nervously, as he took off his glasses, and began to clean them with the hem of his gray sweater, that made him look older than dirt. He put his glasses back on to see Dawn, practically shivering through the tears.

"You love her! You love Buffy the way Angel did….and Riley….and even Spike, in his stalker tendencies. You want Buffy. You want my sister…"

"Dawn…"

"Don't even try lying to me! I know it!"

She stood up, as the stool she had been sitting on fell to the floor. Giles stood up after her, watching as she backed away from him, shivering. It was as if she was afraid of him all of the sudden. It troubled the older man, his face remaining calm even through all this emotion. It must have been from all his British roots.

"Dawn, I really don't know how you got this insane notion into your brain, but its very far from being true. Buffy always has been and always will be like a daughter to me."

"YOU'RE SUCH A LIAR!"

He tried to step over to her, but she pulled back, pushing him up against a wall. He got up as he walked towards her again, trying to calm her down. Instead, she screamed at the top of her lungs, calling him a liar once more, before running up the stairs with tears streaming down her face. He watched the young teenager go, who seemed to be in so much pain, because they both knew that what he had just said was a flat out lie. He felt the pain in his back from being thrown up against the wall, and the pain in his heart from having to lie to Dawn. He had always felt more than just a fatherly love for Buffy. He was just being an insufferable British git. However, he could never tell her the truth. She would never understand. He barely understood his feelings as it was.

He sighed deeply as he walked his way back over to a stool by the small table in the kitchen, where his tea was. He took a sip of his tea as he heard someone coming down the steps. He looked up as his eyes met his Slayers. He stood up, and smiled, as she nodded at him.

"What was all that yelling about, Giles? It woke me up."

"I'm very sorry, Buffy. Dawn and I just had a little bit of a misunderstanding."

"Sounded to me like more that a little bit. What was it about?"

He shook his head as he watched her make her way over to the fridge, to find something to eat for breakfast. The young blonde-haired woman, who was normally so alive and bubbly, was barley showing a smile. She looked drained, and extremely exhausted and it took all his energy to make sure his body did not move. Even if he felt like running over to her, and wrapping his arms around her and never letting go, he knew he shouldn't. He wanted to comfort and cuddle her, until she was ready to let go of her mother.

"It's nothing to trouble your mind with, Buffy. Just some teenager concerns….false concerns."

She nodded as she pulled out a bottle of orange juice, and headed to the cabinet to find her a glass. Giles watched the younger woman as she poured the continents of the bottle into the glass. Giles gulped as he felt his blood boil at the look of her back, curving into her bottom. He felt his whole body shiver in ungodly ways, as he turned himself back to his tea, patting his head with a towel. God, how could she suddenly make his body ache for her so? Maybe it was because something deep down inside him may have been finally admitting the feelings he had for his Slayer. The feelings had always been there, in some shape or form, they where just not admitted until recently.

Seconds later, he felt her sit down beside him, slurping on her orange juice. Sometimes, she was so childlike, and yet sometimes she could be a very grown up woman. Now, with the crinkles near his green eyes showing a small smile, accompanying it with a laugh. She stopped drinking, and looked back over at him, titling her head to the side.

"And what is so funny, Mr. Watcher?"

"My slayer, still acting as though she's 16…"

She smiled and shrugged her shoulders, before putting the cup down in front of her. He laughed once more at her, as he felt her shove him.

"I'm so not acting like a 16 year old!"

"No, at this moment you're acting like a three year old."

She rolled her eyes, as he laughed once more, before she looked back down at her orange juice, with a serious look on her face. She knew that even though they where kidding around, she still had a very important job to do. Not only was she the Slayer, destined to protect the world from all the evils that had ever tried to destroy it and those that would come in the future. But she was also now a single parent to her little 14 year old sister named Dawn. She did not know if she would be able to be a good mother, find a job, finish College at UC Sunnydale, take care of her little sister, and teach her how to be a good person. Moreover, there were the bills that would need to be paid, and groceries, and other things that would be required to take care of a teenager. She did not know if she could do it. She felt his hand on her shoulder as she turned back over to him.

"Giles…"

"Buffy, I'm not going to leave you. You're going to be just fine…"

She felt the tears fall as he pulled her into his arms, and her head fell to his shoulder, to listen to his heart as she cried her eyes out. She knew that it would take a long time for the hole in her heart to heal, but as long as she had Giles, her watcher and best friend, by her side she would be all right. She looked up as she heard a voice at the doorway to the kitchen. Giles pulled away from her, and got up, turning to the cabinet, to pretend to make more tea.

"Dawn?"
"Buffy….."

"What is it?"

"Xander just called. Anya and he are coming over…"

"Oh. That's nice."

"And Willow and Tara. They're going to cook us a big breakfast…"

Giles turned around to watch the two talking, not saying a word. All he knew was that he was lost in his thoughts. A relationship with Buffy, a woman a little more than half his age, would be very disturbing to her friends and to himself as well. Yet, it was something that he craved more than anything else. Buffy was an intoxicating woman. The way she looked, and spoke, and cared from everyone. She was beautiful, inside and out, and the thought of being able to win her heart caused him more pleasure than anything else in the whole world. Buffy turned to Giles, smiling at him softly, before looking back over at her sister.

"That sounds like fun, Dawn. Really, it does. It will help get my mind of things…"

"Good…because anything to get both of your minds off this will do us all a bit of good."

Dawn looked over at him after he spoke, with that same look in her eyes. Giles was becoming too…..too much like men Buffy had dated. He was sort of acting like Riley, whom Dawn had cared for more than anyone else Buffy had ever dated. Riley had been a sweet man, who was very devoted to Buffy, and loved her with all his heart. Nevertheless, Buffy had not felt the same. Maybe it was the same situation she was in with Giles, but Buffy had no idea of how her Watcher felt for her. Only Dawn did, and it meant that she would have to keep an eye on him. She did not trust him. Would he really take care of her sister if they got together? Would they be happy, and would the be good for each other? Would it be anything other than lust?

Dawn did not know much about anything, but she knew that Buffy and Giles loved each other, and that it might not have been too bad if they were together. Buffy needed someone strong, handsome, and protective. Giles was all those things and more. Maybe if Dawn trusted him to take care of her sister, maybe they would be just what they both needed. After all, she loved them both dearly, and wanted them to be happy. She smiled softly over at Giles, nodding. He did not know by what she meant, but she would ask her about it later.

"Guess who's here?"

A man's voice called from the front room. Dawn grinned as she ran for the door. Giles looked back over at Buffy as the two walked out of the kitchen almost side by side, with there hands brushing. It sent Giles pulse to racing, and Buffy felt something too, something she had never felt before. It disturbed her, but she tried not to think about it as they arrived in the front room, to see Anya and Xander standing there.

"I have come baring pancake batter!"

Xander laughed softly, as Dawn hugged him. Xander was worried about the Dawnster, as well as the Buffster. He did not have any idea of how they felt. They had lost their Mom, someone who was one of the most important people in their young lives. That was why he felt he had to be with them, and help them through every day, one-step at a time. As Dawn moved away from him, Buffy walked over, wrapping her arms around him. Xander had always been there for her, and he would continue to always be there. It was what best friends are for.

"Thanks for coming, Xand. It's really sweet of you."

"Xander just thought we should be here….in your time of grieving…"

"Yeah, Buff. What are friends for, if not being there when you need them?"

After Anya spoke up softly as Buffy nodded, reaching over and giving her a hug as well. Buffy felt lucky to have such good friends, whom she could always count on. Buffy moved away as Dawn followed Anya and Xander into the kitchen to start the breakfast. Giles had stayed by the doorway that leads from the kitchen to the living room. He could see that Buffy was still depressed, and it would take her a while to get over her loss, which really was not a good thing. With Glory looking on the prowl, for the Key, Buffy and Dawn could not have lost their mother at a worse time. Buffy needed to be alert, just in case Glory decided to pay another house call. It filled his heart with worry, for Dawn but more so for Buffy. Glory was the most powerful being she had been up against, and they did not know much about her. Only what the council could uncover, which wasn't much to go on.

Buffy turned to look at him, tilting her head to the side. She sensed something.

"Giles?"

He looked up to meet Buffy's blue-gray eyes, cautiously. He titled his head, wondering what it was.

"Yes, Buffy?"

"What's wrong?"

"I'm….just worried. With the loss of your mother, it would be the perfect time for Glory to come in, and hurt you…and Dawn."

She nodded, looking into those green eyes that she had known all to well over the years. She knew that he was worried; by the little wrinkles he had in the corners of his eyes and just the look of his face in general. She walked over to him, and for some reason, touched his face softly. A feeling crept through her body once more, that felt like electricity, a feeling she had only felt when she had touched Angel this way. She pulled it away, shaken by her feelings, but looked up at him again.

"Don't worry, Giles. I will grieve and move on. Glory will not be able to hurt me. Trust me."

He nodded, looking down at her, longing for her hand to be at his cheek again. The feeling that had run through his body of passion and desire had felt very wrong and yet, he wanted it to happen repeatedly. He knew it now. Dawn was right. He was in love with Buffy Anne Summers. He would have to talk to her again later, and apologize.

"I do trust you."

The two of them looked up as the door opened to reveal Tara and Willow, loaded with goodies and other things. Buffy smiled as Willow sat her bag down on the side table. Buffy walked over, giving her friend a hug. Willow had always been her best friend, and probably always would be. And she couldn't be happier that she was sticking by her side in such a horrible time.

"Thanks for coming, Will."

"Your welcome, Buffy…."

Tara smiled as she gave Buffy a hug as well. Tara knew what Buffy was going through, being there she when she was 17. Therefore, Buffy had rather bonded to Tara, closer than they had ever been before. As Buffy pulled away, the pair walked towards the kitchen to give Xander the food. Buffy turned back, to see that Giles had left the room. It puzzled her, but she shrugged it off. Maybe he just wanted to be alone.

Giles let the cold-water drip down his face, splashing it to drive away the feelings he could not help but feel. He wished he could leave, go back home. It would be better for the both of them. Nevertheless, he knew that Buffy needed him now. He could not just abandon her now in her time of need. She was so hurt, and alone. Her mother passing was leaving a hole in her heart that he did not know if he should help fill. He looked up to see Dawn standing in the doorway. She smiled, before closing the door behind her. He reached for a towel, drying off his face, before looking back over at him.

"Giles."

"Dawn, you were right. I do have feelings for your sister."

Dawn nodded as she moved over, reaching up and giving him a hug. She hoped he would understand that it was ok to love her sister. It was not wrong. Love was never wrong, and age was only a number. It may not have been something the rest of the world would agree on, but she knew she did. She pulled away as he smiled, patting her on the shoulder.

"Its ok, Giles. Really. Buffy needs someone to take care of her, and love her with all his heart. I know you would be the kind of person she needs. So, don't worry. I wouldn't freak out."

"But if Buffy ever found out…"

"I don't think it would bother her all that much."

Giles looked down at Dawn, reading her eyes. Buffy?Not mind? How could that be possible? He was her Watcher, her friend, and that was as far as the feelings where suppose to go. He sighed as he shook his head, walking over to the tub and sitting down on the edge. Dawn sat down on the toilet beside him.

"Dawn, Buffy…is probably one of the most beautiful people I know, inside and out. But, the concept of actually being with her….being able to touch her the way Riley and Angel did…It doesn't seem possible."

"Why? Giles, she loves you. And I know she's been feeling something between you too lately, just like you. I've seen it in her eyes."

"Really?"

He titled his head as she nodded, giving him yet another warm smile. She was trying to give him support, so that he wouldn't give up. Buffy needed someone as strong, kind, and loving as Giles, and Giles needed someone to love him and take care of him. To Dawn, they seemed like the perfect match. They where two people that she loved with all her heart, and she wanted nothing more that for them to be happy.

"Yes. Just give it some time. She'll come around."

He smiled as she got up, giving him a quick hug, before walking out of the bathroom, turning towards the steps. He sighed, rubbing his face with the towel, before getting up, grabbing his glasses, and following the younger girl towards the smell of pancakes and waffles.