Jennica's Story

2. Unexpected Revelations

J/C

Rated MA

June 2009

By: AW

Length: 6,757 words

Summary: Six hours after 'Rough Beginnings'. B'Elanna, Kathryn and Jennica all have some dealing to do.

Disclaimer: blah blah blah, I DON'T OWN THEM

[Sickbay – 6 hours after part 1. Rough Beginnings]

Kathryn stared down at baby Hannah. She was a cute little baby, the only one of her three children with her father's dark eyes.

They had made an announcement that the child had been born during the Void incident and anyone who had been told of the child's sex was informed that the doctor had been mistaken.

B'Elanna didn't believe it.

Tom knew the truth.

Jennica was hurt by the whole incident. She had finally begun to accept her humanity and this had happened and she had sunken deeper into her 'Borg Persona'.

She was now Seven of Nine and nothing else.

Kathryn took the baby off her breast and looked down at the perfect rosebud lips of her newest daughter, so much like her father, all she needed was a tattoo.

Kathryn almost laughed at her internal comment.

Taya walked in with her father and looked at her new baby sister. "I thought you were going to have a boy mommy."

Kathryn laughed, "Until the baby is born Taya, we never really know. We were just guessing."

Taya seemed to accept this and went back to see Hailey sitting in the playpen beside Kathryn's bed.

Three kids in five years, wow: They had their work cut out for them.

Chakotay walked up to Haley and picked her up to bring her over to Kathryn, "Here...I'll trade ya."

Kathryn glared at her husband and passed the newest Janeway to her father. "Have you talked to Jennica since this whole ordeal happened?"

Chakotay let a shadow fall over his face and wasn't sure how to respond. According to the doctor Jennica had been responsible for Kole's death, and even though she was Kathryn's daughter he wasn't sure he could ever forgive her.

"How about we worry about these three and forget about Seven for a while."

Kathryn sighed, "I can't just forget about Jennica Chakotay. She's my child."

"She told me she prefers not to be called Jennica anymore and that she'd prefer Seven as her moniker."

"Well I can still think of her as Jennica."

The doors to sickbay opened and in came B'Elanna. "So this is the baby that everyone's talking about." She reached out and Chakotay passed the new baby to his friend. "My god she looks a lot like you Chakotay."

Chakotay smiled, pride on his face. "Finally, one that looks like me."

Kathryn laughed, "Come on Taya sort of looks like you."

"Except the blue eyes."

She smiled, "Except the blue eyes."

Kathryn placed her hand on her barren womb, never to bring another baby into the world. She was sore; even more sore than she had been after the other births, but then again she had had a piece of her body ripped out when she had been forced to have the hysterectomy.

She sighed and passed Haley to her father. "Here take her for me will you?"

Chakotay grabbed the baby and stared at his wife. "You know you can't blame yourself for this Kathryn. If anyone is to blame it's Seven."

Kathryn decided it was time to change the subject, "So how is Tom taking to fatherhood?"

"He loves it, he's a little bitter that he wasn't there for Miral's birth, but aside from that it's going great." She paused, "Kathryn, my daughter was born 5 months ago, I think we've already covered all of this."

Kathryn bowed her head, "I know, I was just seeing if anything had changed."

B'Elanna glared at her, "Come on Kathryn, what really happened during Hannah's birth."

"Nothing I almost bled out and was forced to have a hysterectomy so Hannah is going to be our last."

"I don't buy it, Chakotay are you going to tell me what really happened?"

Chakotay stared at Kathryn's pleading face and turned back to B'Elanna, "That is what really happened, I don't know why you don't believe it."

"Fine Chakotay, if you won't tell me I'll find out another way."

Kathryn had tears falling down her face, "Please B'Elanna: Don't dig into this."

B'Elanna looked at the stricken face of her Captain and nodded.

Then she walked out of sickbay without another word.

Chakotay stared at his wife, "People are going to find out eventually Kathryn."

"Maybe, but not from me, and not from you: This is one secret I'll take to my grave if I have to."

Chakotay scoffed, "Yeah like the secret of how you became pregnant with Tom Paris' child a year and a half ago."

Kathryn had hurt written all over her face, "Please Chakotay, don't do this."

Chakotay took Haley from her mother and took Taya by the other hand and walked out of sickbay, leaving Kathryn feeling more alone and afraid than ever.

[Paris Quarters – 3 hours later]

B'Elanna had just spent the last two hours battling Cardassians. She took the regenerator out of it's hiding place and sealed the bones and the skin that had been shattered.

She heard the door open and Tom walked in with baby Miral. "B'Elanna?"

"I'm in here Tom, I'll be out in a second."

He looked at his wife. "Where's little Katie?"

"I left her at Sam's for a while, I needed to run my exercise program to try and get most of the baby weight off of me from the last baby."

"So much for humans and Kliingons not being genetically compatible."

B'Elanna snorted. "Yeah, well this is it. No more babies for us."

He looked at Miral, who had just begun toddling around the apartment. "Man kids grow up fast."

"Don't they all. I still can't believe you have a 23 year old."

Tom shook his head, "Don't B'Elanna, I'm not telling you what happened. If Kathryn chooses to share that with you then fine, but aside from that don't get involved."

B'Elanna stretched her newly healed arm. "I need to know about that abortion that she had earlier this year: I know that baby was yours, what happened?"

Paris looked at his wife, "Again, you want to know ask Kathryn."

B'Elanna sighed and went to leave the quarters, "I have to go and pick up Katie."

There was a tense silence between the couple and not another word was said.

[0700 hours next day – sickbay]

The doctor walked up to Kathryn's bedside. She had gotten her uniform on and was ready to go. "May I leave and take the baby with me? I think that Jennica would like to formally meet her sister."

The doctor didn't look happy. "I want to see you back here in a week to make sure that everything healed properly Captain. I know I've taken you off duty for at least two weeks."

Kathryn looked at the doctor, "Fine, now may I leave?"

The doctor nodded and Kathryn took baby Hannah and quickly left sickbay.

[Cargo Bay 2]

Kathryn walked in baby Hannah with her. She'd have to ask Chakotay why the name Hannah?

She saw Jennica standing against the wall 'regenerating'. What had she done to this poor girl.

She walked up to the alcove and awakened her. Seven's eyes opened and she stared at her mother. "Captain Janeway."

Kathryn shook her head and was incredulous at the hate that this woman held for her: her mother.

"Jennica."

"Seven."

Kathryn sighed, "Fine Seven." She brought the baby up to Jennica's arms, "Would you like to hold your baby sister?"

Seven shook her head, "I have already seen the infant Captain."

"I know what happened was sad, and I thank you for helping me through the birth, but you need to let these hurt feelings go. I don't blame you for Kole's death."

Seven raised an eyebrow, "Can you say the same thing about your husband?"

Kathryn sighed and pushed Hannah up near Seven's arms. "Here, take her. Meet her, you might want to have children of your own someday."

"Highly unlikely Captain."

Kathryn looked once more at her first daughter who refused to meet her baby sister and walked out of the cargo bay.

[Janeway Quarters]

Chakotay had just put the children to bed. He realized that Jennica would continue to come between him and Kathryn if he didn't do something to fix it.

But who could he get to talk to her? Tom and B'Elanna were busy with their own problems, the doctor he supposed: but he wasn't real. Kathryn was probably trying to fix it on her own so who was left?

Chakotay tapped his combadge, "Chakotay to Harry."

Harry sounded as if he'd been sleeping, "Yes Commander?"

"Can you do me a favour?"

Harry paused thinking he was sure that the Commander was gonna try to get him to fix some engineering conundrum but was pleasantly surprised when it was of a more personal nature. "You want me to go and visit Seven? You want me to try and help her through this?"

Chakotay stopped, "She'll know what happened and if she chooses to share it with you, then fine, but she needs someone to talk to."

"Must be slim picking's Commander if you're asking for my help."

"Let's just say that everyone else is involved in one way or another already."

Harry felt kind of insulted. "I guess last in line is better than not being in line at all."

Chakotay chuckled, "Thanks Harry."

"No problem Commander."

Now all Harry had to do was figure out how he was going to approach a problem he knew nothing about.

[Cargo Bay 2 – 20 minutes later]

Harry walked into the darkened cargo bay and watched Jennica standing at attention in her regeneration alcove.

He didn't really want to disturb her but he owed the Captain and Commander so much over the past five years.

He approached the former drone and had to stop himself from tapping her timidly on the shoulder.

He heard the words, 'regeneration cycle complete' and backed off as she stepped out of her self-imposed solitude and lifted his hand up to wave at her.

"Hi Seven."

"Ensign Kim."

He didn't want to tell her that her step-father had asked him to approach her, but he all of a sudden almost lost his nerve.

"I thought you might like someone to talk to after the past three days."

"Ensign Kim, I am not in need of someone to talk to at this juncture but should I need your help in future: I will remember your offer."

He looked at Jennica, "You know when I first met Captain Janeway she scared me. I wanted to impress her at every turn." He paused seeing if this was sinking in. "As the years went on though, I realized she was just as human as the rest of us."

"Ensign Kim, I do not wish to speak with anyone about my new sister or my dead brother."

Harry's eyes almost bugged out of his head at the realization of what had actually happened. "Brother? You must be mistaken, as far as I know only Hannah was born two days ago."

"Harry, I was there; and not only was there a male child born, but I killed him." She turned to walk back into the alcove. "Now if you'll excuse me I have to finish my regeneration cycle."

Harry looked at Seven, "The computer said that you were done your regeneration cycle."

Jennica walked up to him, "Possibly, but I really don't feel like talking to anyone about these events." Harry's jaw dropped open. "You need to talk to someone about this Jennica; it's not healthy to keep it all bottled up."

"I am not Jennica I am –"

"I know you're Seven of Nine, and you'll have to let that go too."

"I refuse to become the weak human being that everyone wants me to be."

He reached up and brushed an errant strand of hair out of her face. "You're a beautiful woman inside and out and the crew will see you as that if you'd just let them in: Give your mother a chance."

Seven stepped out of the alcove. "Very well, but will you please take my step-father out for a beer or something? I need to speak to my mother by herself."

Harry nodded, "I think I can arrange that."

Harry walked out of the Cargo Bay and hit his combadge. "Harry to Tom."

"Yes Harry?"

"Can you please take the Janeway children for the night? There are some things that need to be taken care of without the children there."

"Sure no problem Harry but why are you the one asking?"

"Just trust me Tom, and take the kids for a while."

"Okay, okay I'll be down to pick them up in a minute."

"Thanks Tom."

Harry closed the line and went off to the messhall.

[Janeway Quarters]

Tom walked up to the door to the Janeway Quarters and rang for admittance. Chakotay answered with Hannah in his arms. "Hey Commander, I was asked to take the children for the night."

Chakotay looked curiously at Tom, "Okay?"

Harry approached from the other side, "Hey Commander, I got them to take the kids so I could take you out for a beer."

Chakotay looked at the pair of troublemakers and knew he was being set up. "What about Kathryn?"

"I think she should stay home tonight."

Chakotay handed the youngest Janeway to Tom and beckoned Taya over and went to get Haley. "Here you go I think that's all of them." He called to Kathryn, "Kat, Tom's taking the kids and Harry's taking me out for a beer."

Kathryn heard the unsure tone of his voice and called out, "Why do I think we're being set up?"

Chakotay laughed, "Probably because we are."

Kathryn turned around and got out of her uniform. How had she ever lived in a place so quiet without kids and a husband.

She sighed and walked over to the couch and took a coffee from the replicator and sat down to the blissful quietness.

Before Kathryn had a chance to relax, the door chime rang. She called out "Come."

Jennica was standing at the door almost looking afraid to come in. "I'm sorry mom."

Kathryn stared at her firstborn, unsure how to take her change of mood. "Sorry for what?"

"Sorry for everything. I didn't mean to kill Kole, I know how much you wanted that baby boy."

Kathryn raised an eyebrow. "I don't blame you for any of that. If you hadn't been there maybe neither baby would have survived."

"Or maybe both."

"I didn't even know there were two kids to worry about Jennica."

Jennica looked at her mother, time to bring out the big guns, "Your husband thinks it was my fault. He thinks I killed his son."

"He's just hurt. He was looking forward to having a son and when that baby didn't survive he felt betrayed, and confused."

"And he took it out on me. I can never be a part of your family. I don't deserve to be a Janeway."

"That's not –"

Kathryn didn't even get to finish her sentence before she completed her thought, Seven was gone.

[Paris Quarters]

Tom was watching five children, his wife had told him she was needed in engineering. Just three months ago, she had told him that once Katie was born she would be taking some time off, but she wasn't slowing down even one bit.

Oh well, he knew he'd married a workaholic when he'd first married her.

[Holodeck]

B'Elanna walked up to the doors of the holodeck and called out for the holodeck to open up and give her access to the new schematics to the Delta Flyer. "Computer, activate holodeck program Torres two one six."

The computer answered, "The program is active."

She looked around to make sure no one was watching. "Disengage safety protocols."

"Warning. Disengaging safety protocols presents extreme risk of injury."

"Override."

"Acknowledged. Safety protocols have been disengaged."

She'd felt dead and empty since she had heard about the Maquis. Since the birth of her children, it had almost taken on a life of it's own. She was no longer the chief engineer of the vessel, she was the mother of Miral and Katie.

She all of a sudden understood what Kathryn felt sometimes with three kids. And a forth grown.

Then she thought about the infidelity on the part of her husband and with none other than the great Kathryn Janeway.

Life wasn't fair.

B'Elanna sat down at the helm of the 'Delta Flyer' recreation, "Computer, activate immersion shielding.

"Immersion shielding activated."

"Commence descent sequence." What she was doing was dangerous and she knew it, but she had to feel she had something to live for besides children and a husband.

Maybe she and Tom had rushed into this marital bliss thing, and maybe they'd rushed into parenthood.

"Range to probe, thirty thousand kilometres. Twenty five thousand. Warning. Atmospheric pressure is exceeding tolerance levels. Rapid ascent recommended."

"Continue descent."

"Acknowledged. Range to probe, ten thousand kilometres."

"Safety protocols have been disengaged. Warning. Atmospheric pressure is exceeding tolerance levels."

She was an engineer she could fix this, "Re-route power from secondary systems to structural integrity."

"Acknowledged. Micro-fractures are present in zones one and four."

And then something hit her, she felt it and then she felt the bliss of unconsciousness and she finally felt again.

[Paris Quarters]

B'Elanna was taking forever. He knew that this whole parenthood thing had been hard on her, losing her freedom.

Where Tom begged for the stability that a life with a wife and children brought him, B'Elanna lashed out against it.

It wasn't her.

And he was afraid she thought she was losing herself in a role that Tom himself had forced upon her.

[Janeway Quarters – 0200 hours]

The men had been out for a long time. Kathryn felt so alone at this point. The children were probably asleep and Tom was with them, "Kathryn to B'Elanna." She needed a girls night.

No answer, "Computer, locate Lieutenant Torres."

"Lieutenant Torres is in Holodeck one."

Hmmm, maybe it was her fun day too. If Chakotay could go out for a beer with the boys, then she could go and have fun with B'Elanna.

She exited her quarters and headed for Holodeck One.

[Holodeck One]

Kathryn walked into the holodeck and saw the last thing she expected. B'Elanna was lying on the floor obviously hurt, and running a simulation of the new Delta Flyer. She rushed up to her side.

She called to B'Elanna hoping she would wake up. She felt for her pulse and felt a thready one.

The computer blared out the grim deadline, "Warning. Hull microfractures are present in zones one, two, three and four. Hull breach is imminent. Repeat.

Hull microfracture are present in zones one, two, three and four. Hull breach is imminent."

She called out, "Computer, freeze program! B'Elanna. Janeway to Sickbay. Medical emergency!"

B'Elanna slowly woke from her stupor and looked around realizing she was in sickbay. The doctor approached her and she asked him, "What am I doing here?"

"You had an accident on the Holodeck."

"How long was I out?"

"Almost twelve hours."

"I'd better get back to my quarters, Tom is probably wondering where I am."

"Not just yet."

"Why?"

"The Captain's asked me to keep you here. She would like to talk to you."

"But I feel fine."

Kathryn walked in wearing a loose dresss, she was still on maternity leave, but the doctor was saying she was coming to her as the Captain, not as Kathryn.

"Would you excuse us please, Doctor."

"Captain, what's going on?"

"Come on B'Elanna, this is not the Captain and Chief Engineer talking, this is Kathryn and B'Elanna. The doctor said you had multiple injuries and some of them are weeks, even months old."

"Well, I'm an engineer. I've had my share of bumps and bruises."

She stared at her chief engineer and best friend, "But you didn't seek treatment for any of these? Come on B'Elanna talk to me."

B'Elanna felt the tears welling in her eyes, "I can't."

Kathryn looked at her confused, "Why not?"

"Because I don't know how to tell you or anyone else that the things that people want in life so badly are killing me."

"I don't understand B'E."

"I have the perfect life. I have the children, I have the marriage, but sometimes it seems like it's not real: this isn't me."

Kathryn saw B'Elanna staring at the floor. She tilted her head up so she was staring her in the eyes. "B'Elanna, I know that family life is sometimes overwhelming. I know how you feel: trust me. When there's a problem with the warp core there's a clear cut answer and that's not always the case when dealing with children and a husband, but sometimes you just have to make that leap and accept the things that life has thrown at you."

"Like you did with Jennica?"

Kathryn's jaw dropped open. "What I did with Jennica, was a long time ago."

"And it's still part of your life. Is that why you stranded us? Running away from your demons and ghosts?"

"B'Elanna I –"

"When you first blew up the Caretaker's array no one understood it, but I'm pretty sure that people understand it now. You thought you were getting rid of yours and Tom's dirty trash: You could start new here with Chakotay and forget about your past, but it didn't happen did it?"

Kathryn looked at B'Elanna, "I don't think there's anything else I can do here doctor. Clean her up and then she's off duty until she gets this all straightened out."

The doctor nodded, but realized that there was more going on here than anyone realized or accepted.

[Janeway Quarters]

Kathryn walked into her quarters and saw Chakotay sleeping on the couch with Hannah sleeping on his chest.

She smiled at the image that they made and walked up and picked up Hannah. She put her in her crib, and walked back to her husband and brushed a finger along his cheek, trying to wake him without giving him a start.

"Hannah!"

Chakotay looked around worriedly hoping he hadn't dropped his youngest baby girl. "It's okay honey, I put her in her crib for the night and I think soon she'll be up begging for food anyway.

Her prophetic words were answered when Hannah began fussing in her crib. She went to the baby and picked her up. She sat down beside Chakotay and clasped the baby to her breast silencing the hungry whines.

She turned to her husband and said, "I missed you tonight, but I had to go and try to help B'Elanna out."

"What's wrong?"`

"We should have seen it sooner, B'Elanna having trouble dealing with motherhood and marriage, and Jennica."

Chakotay raised a hand and ran it over the dark hair. "I think we're all having trouble dealing with Jennica in some way or another."

Kathryn sighed, "I know Chakotay but she is my daughter too."

"I know Kathryn, and if you weren't trying to help her: You wouldn't be you."

[Hallway]

Jennica walked along the hallway, she had just blamed her mother for everything that had happened in her life.

Was her mother really to blame?

As she walked down the hall with her head down she ran into a solid object. As she brought her head up she saw Harry standing there staring at her.

"Harry, what is the big deal about human emotions that everyone is so infatuated with?"

Harry stared at the attractive woman before him and brought his lips down to hers.

The kiss deepened and Jennica looked up confused. She felt 'butterflies' in her stomach and all of a sudden began to realize what her mother and father saw in these human emotions.

She looked up into the deep brown eyes of Harry and lifted her head up to experience the kiss again.

"You see what humans see in the emotions?"

Jennica nodded perplexed and followed Harry into his quarters.

Jennica gave in to the emotions that she knew laid just below the surface of the Borg Drone and allowed Harry to touch her supple breasts.

She felt the jolts go through her body and her mind processed this as the beginnings of an orgasm.

"Is this what –"

"Shut up Jenn."

Jennica laid down and enjoyed, as Harry brought his mouth to her sexual organs. She felt her breath escaping her, and her breathing speed up.

She felt the sensations continuing and his penis entered her. She screeched at the momentary pain that occurred when the hymen of a woman was broken, and she knew she was no longer a virgin.

She let out her breath and felt Harry's lips descend on hers and the feelings continue. She laid back and felt herself being filled with what she acerbically knew was semen.

She finally understood why sex was not something to be thought through or analyzed but merely enjoyed.

Jennica stared at Harry after it was all over and got up. The black jumpsuit quickly being donned and rushing out of his quarters in a flurry of fear and anxiety.

[Hallway outside Paris Quarters – 0300 hours]

Jennica rang the chime to the Paris Quarters and a sleep deprived B'Elanna Torres answered the door. "Jennica?"

"Is Tom home?"

B'Elanna shook her head confused, "Yes why?"

"Can you leave him a note and come with me to the mess hall? I am in need of a chat.

B'Elanna nodded and against her better judgement agreed. She wrote a note to Tom stating that she was going for coffee with a friend who needed a shoulder to cry on. She knew that Tom would think it was Kathryn and he would know she was safe.

Jennica followed B'Elanna to the mess hall and the darkness engulfed both women.

"What is it Jennica? What was so important that you needed to talk to me or anyone at 0300 hours?"

Jennica sighed, "I think I just had my first sexual experience."

B'Elanna's jaw dropped. "Okay."

"I did not feel comfortable going to my mother with this considering that my 'sexual partner' was her head ops officer."

B'Elanna shook her head again, "I beg your pardon."

"I said I think I just had sex with Harry."

"You either did or you didn't."

"Well I felt my 'hymen break and his seed flood my cervix."

"Well then I would say you just had sex for the first time."

Jennica nodded and walked out of the mess hall. "Thank you for the information Lieutenant."

B'Elanna sat dazed by the turn of events.

[0600 Janeway Quarters – 2 weeks later]

"Come on Chakotay we have to get to Celes', drop the kids off and then we have to get to the bridge."

Chakotay grunted, "You know I thought you were bossy before, but I'm telling you, having a month off and then becoming the Captain again: it takes the cake."

Kathryn glared at her husband. "Yeah and me being late for duty on my first day back would not be a good thing."

[0700 Kim's Quarters]

Jennica rolled over and looked at Harry. "Harry, I have to go regenerate at some point. I can't go so long without it."

Harry moaned, "I know Jenn, but I wish you didn't have to."

"I think I'm going to go see the doctor today and see if I can slowly be 'weaned' off of the regeneration unit. It's been what two years?"

Harry sighed, "Are you on boosters?"

Jennica stared at Harry, "Am I on what?"

"Oh god, I don't suppose anyone has had the talk with you have they?"

She stared at him, "The talk about what?"

Harry rolled his eyes, "The sex talk."

"I fully understand how to have sex we've been doing it for two weeks."

"That's not the sex talk I'm referring to. Has anyone talked to you about the birds and the bees?"

The light went on in Jennica's eyes, "Oh that talk."

"Yeah that talk. Maybe you should go and talk to your mom."

"Oh yeah I can picture how that one would go."

[0900 – Bridge]

Kathryn walked out of her ready room. Something was definitely up. Harry would not look her in the eyes. Hmmm... "Ensign."

"Uh, hello Captain."

"Harry you've already said hello to me three times this morning."

Kathryn walked down to the lower level of the bridge and sat in the command chair. She motioned for Chakotay to come close to her. "What is going on with Harry?"

Chakotay shrugged, "I have no idea. Maybe he finally landed a DeLaney sister and is embarrassed about it."

"Chakotay he's hardly a child. I'm sure he's had sex before: he was engaged after all."

"You don't think he was a virgin do you?"

Tom snorted.

"Something funny Mr. Paris?"

Tom shook his head, "Nothing at all Captain."

Kathryn went back to her conversation with Chakotay, "Well there is something funny going on and I have to find out what it is."

[1700 hours – Paris Quarters]

"They know something is up B'Elanna."

B'Elanna rolled her eyes, "Well Harry is a little obtuse. He can't lie to the Captain, he was fine when she wasn't on the bridge."

"I can just see how this is going to go. 'Sorry Captain, I've been banging your daughter for the past couple of weeks'."

B'Elanna swatted her husband. "Tom, really."

The baby started crying and B'Elanna got up to get baby Katie. "You know B'Elanna we still haven't talked about what the Captain said to you that day in sickbay."

She shook her head, "It was nothing really."

Tom took Katie from her mother and patted her back, trying to get a burp out of her. "At least you're finally done breastfeeding B'Elanna. Why don't you and Kathryn go out for the night."

B'Elanna considered her options, "You okay with the kids?"

"Remember a month ago I was taking care of five children alone. I'm sure I can handle our two."

B'Elanna nodded and hit her combadge. "B'Elanna to Kathryn."

"Janeway here."

"Can I come over and chat with you, maybe Chakotay can bring Taya, Haley and Hannah over here and the kids can have a play date with Tom and my two."

Kathryn turned and looked at her husband who nodded. Something was up with B'Elanna and she needed to know what. "Okay B'Elanna come on over and Chakotay will be there momentarily with the kids."

[1730 – Janeway Quarters]

"So what's up with B'Elanna?"

Kathryn shook her head. "I have no idea, but I think after that incident two weeks ago, that perhaps I should have a talk with her."

Chakotay took Haley's hand, and motioned for Taya to come along. He was so glad that two of the kids were walking now, it made his life a whole lot easier. "She could just be wanting to talk to you about something work related. Today was your first day back on duty after all."

Kathryn nodded, "I suppose." Chakotay left the quarters and Kathryn sat on the couch, waiting for her friend to come by.

The door chime rang and Kathryn called "Come."

Jennica was there.

[Paris Quarters]

Tom answered the door and saw that Chakotay had made his way to their quarters children in tow.

"Hey Tom."

"Hi. Wow, the kids are getting big."

"Yeah I know." He passed the littlest Janeway to Tom. "This one is still my baby."

"I know. Two months old now?"

"Just about tomorrow is her two month birthday."

Tom looked at Chakotay, "You think your wife can help mine?"

"I think it has even taken me a while to get over everything that has happened between the two of you, and I think that it's still hurting B'Elanna, but I think she'll get over it."

Tom stared at the floor, "I don't love Kathryn the way you do you know." He looked Chakotay in the eyes, "And she only has eyes for you Chak."

Chakotay smiled, "I know, and I'm glad you figured that out before you ruined everything with B'Elanna."

[Janeway Quarters]

"- and then I finally got Katie weaned, and now..."

B'Elanna looked at the scene before her. Jennica was sitting on Kathryn's couch with tears running down her face and Kathryn was staring at her with a hand on her daughter's knee: just listening."

"Oh my god Kat, what's wrong with Jennica?"

Kathryn motioned for B'Elanna to come in. B'Elanna walked over to the table and sat and watched the scene before her. "I didn't even think ahead."

"Have you been to see the doctor?"

Jennica shook her head. "I didn't want to worry anyone until I was sure, and I'm still not."

B'Elanna watched the scene play out before her. This wasn't exactly what she had planned for the night, but Jennica obviously needed to talk.

"Kathryn –"

Kathryn raised her hand stopping B'Elanna's questions before they began. "Jennica, you need to know for sure."

Kathryn pulled out a tricorder from behind her couch. "I can give you a quick scan now if you want, but I have to tell you that it will tell me who the father is."

"I don't want you to know mom."

B'Elanna's jaw dropped open, as she listened to everything that was going on. "I'm going to find out eventually Jennica, this isn't something that you can keep a secret forever."

"What if I don't want this baby?"

"The father has to know."

Kathryn felt her life re-playing before her.

She remembered a year ago, a moment in time where her and Tom had found each other on Earth. She felt her life unravelling before her, she had trapped her crew 400 years in the past, she had to find a way out. She was wound tighter then a violin string.

"Kathryn calm down you'll get us out of this, you always manage to pull that rabbit out of your hat."

She looked at Tom, "I am so tired of living on the edge like this. Chakotay and I haven't been getting along: it's just not right."

And then he kissed her, and she felt the déjà vu of many years ago. That day the two of them had conceived Jennica.

"We can't do this Tom. You're married, I'm married. We have children depending on us, there's too much at stake."

He let his hand clasp her breast and Kathryn lost herself in the past. It felt as if time stood still and nothing but this moment mattered.

Kathryn looked back at Jennica, pulling herself out of her reverie. She looked to B'Elanna. "Here can you scan her and just tell her if she's pregnant."

Jennica wasn't sure she wanted B'Elanna to know. Harry was after all B'Elanna's husband's best friend. "Okay mom, you can scan me but please don't say anything until I explain."

Kathryn nodded and opened the tricorder. She took the wand out of it's casing and began scanning her daughter. And there it was, a tiny heartbeat, and the father's identity.

Kathryn closed the tricorder and put her hand over her mouth. *Harry is the father of my grandchild.*

She took in a deep breath and turned to B'Elanna. "B'Elanna can you give us some privacy for a minute? How about you go to the mess hall and grab us all a snack."

B'Elanna nodded and left the quarters. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Jennica glared at her mother, "What did you want me to say? Did you want me to tell you I was too stupid to get on boosters? Did you want me to tell you that Harry and I lost ourselves in the moment?"

"I know that we haven't been getting along too well lately, but I'm still your mother."

Jennica nodded, "I don't know if I can have this baby mom. I don't know if Harry wants this baby, I don't know if I can take care of a baby, I don't know if my body will even carry a child to term."

"Shhh, Kathryn hugged her daughter: We'll work it out." Jennica nodded and placed a hand on her belly, "How far along am I?"

"Not that far along, about three weeks."

Jennica nodded. It was the first day they had made love then. They both spun around at the sound of the door opening behind them.

B'Elanna walked in carrying a tray of muffins. "I think they're supposed to be banana muffins, but I'm not sure."

Kathryn smiled. And motioned for her to come over. They all sat at the table and began munching on the muffins.

B'Elanna stared at Jennica, "Well I know that you and Harry have been seeing each other and I know that you lost your virginity to him –"

Kathryn cut her off, "You knew?"

B'Elanna made a face, "What was I supposed to do Kat? Tell you that Harry had deflowered your eldest daughter?"

"Oh this is great, am I the last one to know?"

B'Elanna stared at her best friend, "No I don't think that Tom or Chakotay are privy to this information yet."

Kathryn let her head fall in her hands, "How am I going to tell Chakotay?"

B'Elanna looked at her, "How am I going to tell Tom?"

Jennica got mad, "Neither of you are going to tell anybody anything until I talk to Harry and we decide what to do."

Kathryn walked up to her and hugged her, "I'm always here for you honey, no matter what you and Harry decide."

Jennica nodded and left her mother's quarters. Kathryn went and sat down on the couch. "Quite a day huh B'Elanna."

"Harry huh?"

"Yep Harry."

Kathryn drew in a deep breath and remembered:

She remembered before Jennica even re-entered her life. She knew she was pregnant, and she knew it wasn't even her husband's child. She had so much on her plate, so many things to deal with: the Borg, species 8472, her two children at home a husband that needed her.

And then there was B'Elanna, could she do this to her?

She looked in the mirror and made sure there were no signs yet of the child she carried and she tapped her combadge. "Janeway to Paris."

"Yes ma'am."

"Can you come to my quarters please, just you."

Five minutes later Tom walked through the doors of her quarters. "Tom, I need to talk to you."

Tom nodded and prompted her to continue.

Remember when we were back on Earth, and what happened between us?

Tom nodded, and waited for the bomb to drop.

"I'm pregnant."

"I beg your pardon?"

And she remembered thinking déjà vu, and then she remembered telling him that she couldn't have that baby and that neither of their spouses needed to know.

It was a null point since the doctor had needed to remove the baby to save Kathryn's life, but it still hurt.

She made the decision that she had not been able to make all those years ago; and now her daughter was faced with the same decision.

She heard the doors to her quarters open and the children came in. "B'Elanna came home so I figured you two were done; and just in time too, I think Hannah's hungry."

Kathryn reached for the baby, "Oh, is my little angel hungry?"

The baby greedily latched on to Kathryn's breast. Taya of course found the muffins. "Mom can I have a muffin."

"Sure honey." She turned to Chakotay, "Did you guys eat?"

Chakotay chuckled, "Yeah we had a Paris special: pizza and beer."

Kathryn laughed, "Well at least I know I don't have to feed the family."

Kathryn turned towards the viewport and got lost in thoughts of her eldest daughter and the decisions that had to be made.

[2200 hours – Kim Quarters]

Jennica stood outside the door to Harry's Quarters and brought her finger up to touch the buzzer. When he called for entrance, Jennica walked into the quarters.

"Hey Jenn, what's up?"

She stared him in the eyes. "I'm pregnant Harry."

Harry's jaw dropped open and Jennica was unsure: unsure of everything.

To be continued in 3. Tragic Beginnings