DISCLAIMER: Not mine.
AN. So, is anyone still reading?
Greetings from Orlando, Florida! Today I achieve one of my lifelong dreams- GOING TO DISNEY WORLD! First up, Animal Kingdom. Also I'm here with Julia-Caesar, which is amazing.
I'm (attempting) to post this chapter via the ff app, which I've never used before, so hopefully it looks ok. If not, I'll try and get to an actual computer soon to fix it, and in the meantime please bear with me!
Chapter 2: Forever and Always
Counselling Session, September 1948
Dr Herk Palloa, Limelle psychologist and marriage counsellor, nodded calmly at Elphaba's statement.
"Alright. Well, what we're going to do first, is I just want to get a sense of who the two of you are, as individuals and as a couple. Get some background, and what's led you both to this point. And then we'll work out a strategy to go from here, alright?"
Elphaba and Fiyero nodded silently. They didn't exchange a glance this time, and suddenly seemed very determined to avoid eye contact with one another.
Dr Palloa simply cleared his throat.
"Why don't you tell me about your relationship?" he prodded.
"What do you want to know?" Fiyero asked uncertainly.
"How long have you been together?"
"We've been together for ten years," Elphaba responded. "Married for almost five."
Dr Palloa nodded, making notes.
"You have children?"
"Three," Fiyero nodded.
"Tell me about them," he said.
As intended, Elphaba and Fiyero relaxed considerably at the question.
"Well," Fiyero said, with a glance towards his wife. "Jozua's seven, Cale's five and Jiyah's three. Nearly four. She'll be four in November."
The doctor nodded, wordlessly gesturing for him to elaborate.
"Joz is in second grade. He's a really outgoing kid, bundle of energy really. He loves sport and making things. Cale's just started school this year. We're only two weeks in, so it's a little hard to tell how he's doing. But he seems to enjoy it. He's a really sweet kid, a very gentle nature. He's also really smart, always got his nose in a book. And then there's Jiyah. What can I say about Jiyah? She's our princess."
Dr Palloa nodded, smiling slightly as he made a note. "Elphaba, anything to add?"
Elphaba hesitated. "They're my kids," she finally said simply. "They're my world… our world," she added, glancing at Fiyero.
"And how long have you been separated?"
"About a month and a half," Fiyero said, the smile that had lingered on his face as he talked about his kids fading.
"It's just a trial separation," Elphaba added quickly. "It's not an official separation."
"And who moved out of the marital home?"
He noted a faint grimace crossing Elphaba's face.
"I did," Fiyero explained. "I moved out at the end of July. I'm renting a little house about a ten minute walk away."
"And have you worked out a custody arrangement?"
"We tried to keep everything as normal as possible for the kids," Elphaba said. "Fiyero comes by in the morning. He takes the boys to school and Jiyah to the neighbour who watches her on his way to work. I pick them up in the afternoon when I finish work."
"The kids stay with me Tuesday and Thursday nights during the week and every other weekend," Fiyero continued.
The Peacock frowned slightly. "May I ask why Tuesday and Thursday nights?"
"I do events at my store on Tuesday nights," Elphaba explained. "Book club, stocktake… that kind of thing. It made sense for the kids to stay with Fiyero than get a baby-sitter. And Wednesday nights, Fiyero plays poker with his friends. They've been doing it for eight years, and it just came back to trying to keep things as normal as possible. So, Thursday made sense and it works on the weekends that they stay with him."
Dr Palloa nodded again, making more notes.
"Alright. Now, I'd like you to tell me a little about the events that led to your separation."
Elphaba and Fiyero both fell silent.
"We've been fighting… a lot," Elphaba admitted, staring at her hands. "We kind of reached breaking point."
"Fighting about what?"
"Everything," she said simply. She didn't know what else to say.
The therapist paused only briefly. Twenty-five years of asking this question and it never got easier. "Was there another person involved?"
"No," came the answer in unison, Elphaba simply and matter-of-fact, whilst Fiyero sounded horrified at the very thought.
Dr Palloa nodded and made another note.
"Who made the decision to do marriage counselling?"
"We made it together," Fiyero said firmly.
"It was Fiyero's idea initially," Elphaba added, her tone still quiet.
Fiyero glanced at her briefly, but said nothing.
"Why did you wait until now to broach the idea of counselling?"
"I think we're both fairly independent people. I think we were hoping to come to a solution without any outside help," Elphaba said uncertainly and Fiyero nodded in confirmation. "Obviously, that wasn't going to work."
"Can I ask what you're hoping to accomplish with these sessions? What's your goal?"
The couple stared at him blankly.
"We want to work out our issues," Fiyero answered finally, as though it were obvious. "We want to save our marriage."
The Peacock had his eyes on Elphaba.
"Elphaba?"
Her eyes flicked up to him, and she hesitated.
"We can't accomplish anything unless there's honesty in this room," he reminded her gently.
She nodded faintly, but avoided looking towards her husband.
"I guess… I want to know if we can… if we should save it," she said quietly. "Maybe our issues can't be solved. Maybe it's better, healthier- for us and for the children- to just… be separate. At least as a couple."
Fiyero turned to her, looking determined. "Fae, I told you-"
"I know," she cut him off. "But that doesn't mean it's enough. You can't fix a wound through sheer will."
"No, sometimes you need a band-aid-"
"We can't stick a band-aid on our marriage and hope it just magically fixes itself over time!"
"Which is why we're here!" Fiyero argued.
"Alright," Dr Palloa interjected smoothly. "Have the two of you set up a time frame for this trial separation?"
Elphaba and Fiyero both shook their heads.
"That's fine. Now, it's different for everyone. I've had couples who go on a month-to-month basis; couples who choose to separate for a year; or some who do six months. The idea is that when the deadline comes, they sit down and re-evaluate. Then, they either come to a decision on the state of the relationship- to reunite or make the separation official and move towards divorce, or they extend the trial."
Dr Palloa noticed that Elphaba and Fiyero both flinched at the word "divorce."
"What I'd like to propose is that I meet with you every other week for… let's say the next six months. When the six months are up, we'll re-evaluate. Does that sound plausible?"
Fiyero nodded, but Elphaba continued to stare at her hands silently.
Six months would take them through to March.
"Elphaba?" Fiyero prodded quietly, and her head jerked up.
"Yes. Six months," she repeated, looking to Fiyero and nodding. "It's fine."
Dr Palloa frowned slightly and made a note.
"How has your relationship been since Fiyero moved out? Are you fighting less?"
"Some," Fiyero agreed. "I think most of the time… it's just awkward. It's like we don't know how to be around each other anymore," he said unhappily.
"It's easier if the kids are there," Elphaba admitted and Fiyero agreed again. "I find…" Elphaba faltered only briefly, but pressed on as Dr Palloa looked at her expectantly.
"I think we're both very conscious a lot of the time about what we're saying. In case it does turn into a fight."
The Peacock was silent for a moment as he made a few more notes and then asked to speak to each of them separate for a few moments. He directed Elphaba out to the waiting room and invited her to help herself to tea or coffee, and then turned back to address Fiyero.
"So, I just have a few questions that I want to ask you and Elphaba separately. Just to see how your answers match up," he explained.
Fiyero nodded. "Ask away. I'll answer as best I can."
"How long have you and Elphaba known each other?"
Fiyero's brow furrowed as he thought. "Uh… I guess… like, thirteen years? Wow," he added, sounding a little surprised. "I guess time flies, huh?"
"When you're having fun?" Dr Palloa finished, and Fiyero sobered.
"It hasn't all been fun."
"The separation?"
"Would be one of the 'not fun' parts," Fiyero nodded.
That was an understatement.
"The fighting that led to your decision to separate. When did that start?"
Fiyero hesitated. "We've always argued," he began. "We- Fae and I, we're both rather stubborn," he admitted candidly. "And we both have a bit of a temper, although it's been better since we had the kids. We don't ever want to be those parents screaming at their kids, so we've always tried so hard to keep calm."
"Until recently," the doctor said knowingly, gently pressing for an answer to his question.
Fiyero sighed. "Yeah. I don't really know when it started," he said quietly. "A few months before I moved out, maybe? I think it just happened so gradually and it just exploded, you know?"
Dr Palloa nodded. "You think your marriage can be saved?"
"Yes," Fiyero answered firmly. "I'm not saying we don't have problems, but nothing that we can't work through."
"What if Elphaba's right?"
Fiyero exhaled sharply, rubbing a hand over his brow. "Look, I'm usually the first to admit when Elphaba's right, and she usually is," he confessed. "But, as much as I love her, she's rather pessimistic."
The Peacock cocked his head. "Oh?"
"She calls it realistic," Fiyero acknowledged. "And maybe it is, I don't know. I just don't want to give up without a fight."
"And you think Elphaba is? Giving up without a fight?"
Fiyero blinked in surprise. "What? No! I didn't mean it like that," he said quickly. "I just meant that… Elphaba finds it easier to see all possibilities- even the negative ones. I try and think more positive. Or, it's easier for me to think positive," he explained, clearly choosing his words carefully.
"And why is that?" Dr Palloa asked, although he was sure he knew at least part of the answer.
Even in Limelle after all this time, Elphaba's former life- and reputation-in Oz was widely known, if not acknowledged. The Animal community knew better than anyone the importance of keeping it quiet, and the humans took their cue from the Animals and from Elphaba and Fiyero themselves.
"It's easier to expect bad things to happen when bad things keep happening," Fiyero replied simply, and then frowned. "Fae would word that better."
Dr Palloa chuckled. "I get the sentiment, don't worry."
"What do you want to know? Really, I mean," Fiyero asked.
Dr Palloa put down his notebook and met his gaze steadily. "I want to know what you want."
"I want-"
"Beyond 'I want to save my marriage'," the Peacock interrupted. "Deeper. What do you want?"
Fiyero was stumped and sat there staring blankly at him.
"I want our family to be happy. I want us to be happy. I want Fae to be happy," he said at last.
Dr Palloa almost asked the natural follow up question- even if that meant not being together? But instead, he nodded and made yet another note on his paper.
"You can send Elphaba in now."
The moment Elphaba sat down, Dr Palloa knew that she wasn't going to be as open as her husband. Her body language was stiff and tense and her eyes were guarded.
Dr Palloa started with the same question he'd asked Fiyero.
"So, Elphaba. How long have you and Fiyero known each other?"
"Thirteen years," Elphaba answered immediately.
"So you knew one another for quite a time before getting together, then. Were you friends?"
She faltered briefly. "Yes. In a sense. We didn't see each other for two years."
Dr Palloa nodded in acknowledgement. "I see. Those two years would cover your time as a fugitive, yes?"
Elphaba's eyes flew to his. "Yes," she said at length.
"When would you say that you and Fiyero began arguing?"
"About a minute after we met," she responded dryly and Dr Palloa's pen stalled mid-note.
Elphaba shrugged lightly as he looked up. "We've always argued," she said, unknowingly echoing Fiyero's words. Then she sighed.
"I guess it was about February? It just seemed like we couldn't have a conversation without it turning into an argument. And it didn't stop. At least, February was when I first noticed it. It could have been happening before that."
Dr Palloa cut to the chase. "Elphaba, I need to know what you want to come of these sessions. Because if you're going into this with your mind already made up that your marriage is over, I can't help you."
Elphaba blinked and he thought he detected a glimmer of tears in her eyes.
"I read somewhere once that people fall out of love for the same reason they fell in love. The quirks and trends that used to be so charming, just… lose their charm. And they become flaws that you can't overlook. What used to be a strength in the relationship, becomes a weakness."
"Do you think you've fallen out of love with Fiyero?" the Peacock asked her quietly.
"I don't know," Elphaba murmured, her throat constricted. "I don't want to be, but… just so much has happened. And I'm so tired of fighting," she said wearily.
"Do you think your marriage can be saved?"
"There's still love there, I know there is," Elphaba conceded. "But that may not be enough. If we can't fix the real problems- and I'm not even sure I know what they are- then I think it' better we're apart. I don't want to end up hating him."
"So, what do you want?" Dr Palloa said gently.
Elphaba blinked away the tears that threatened to fall and straightened her shoulders.
"I want us to be able to make a fully informed decision about our future. The best decision. If not for ourselves, then for the kids."
It was like Fiyero had said, Dr Palloa realised as he scribbled notes. Elphaba was saying all the right words and saying them the right way, as though to present herself as being realistic. But there was something in her voice as though she was preparing herself for the worst possible scenario.
"Well," he said finally, looking up at Elphaba. "I think that gives us a starting point. You can ask Fiyero to come back in now, please."
When Elphaba and Fiyero were once again seated beside each other, Dr Palloa smiled at them both.
"I want to thank you both for your honesty. As I said, the success of these sessions will depend on you being open with me, yourselves and each other. If you want to make the best outcome for your marriage, you need to be honest and I think we're off to a good start. Our sessions are going to go deeper into your relationship, from the time you met up to now. With any luck, I'll help you work out what your issues are and how to solve them without arguing. How does that sound?"
Elphaba nodded.
"What do you think?" Fiyero asked him.
"As in, do I think you can save your marriage?" Dr Palloa asked and Fiyero nodded.
"As a rule, I don't really like to pass judgement, especially after only one session. Besides, I can give you the tools to communicate better and get to the root of your problems, but only you and Elphaba can determine what's best for yourselves and your family. I'm here to guide and mediate."
Elphaba and Fiyero exchanged a glance.
"We should go," Elphaba said quietly.
Fiyero nodded and got to his feet. "Yeah, I need to get the kids from Della's."
Dr Palloa told them to book their next appointment with his receptionist before leaving and then bid them farewell.
Taking a moment before his next and final appointment of the day arrived, the Peacock read back over the notes he'd made over the session. He wasn't too sure exactly what the root of Elphaba and Fiyero's issues were yet, but he knew before the couple could decide their fate, they'd have a lot of work to do. Fiyero had to be made to accept the possibility that Elphaba may be right, and she would have to be more open. It would be a long few months.
Chapter Title Song: "Forever and Always" by Taylor Swift
AN. Jemma Rix has an album. It's called "Gravity", is available on iTunes worldwide, and everyone should go listen to it, because it's amazing.
Thank you to those who have suggested songs so far!