Over the river and through the woods, to Grandmother's fucking house we go. The little ditty I had learned as a child played in my mind. We weren't quite going to a kindly grandmother's house, but I felt that it was still mostly applicable to our current situation. Jane, who had clearly not done enough running through the woods previously, dragged somewhat. I was glad that she had at least stopped complaining loudly enough to wake the dead; sadly, that didn't mean she wasn't whining in my ear.
"Do you even know where we're going?" She glared into my eyes as if trying to detect my levels of certainty. Clearly what she found was not up to her code. "You have no fucking clue where we're going, do you?" She leaned as far away as the dense foliage and my grip on her hand would allow.
I brushed the hilt of my knife as I was known to do and smiled, although there was no real mirth in it. "I know the general idea of the place and the current time, but there are things that make this grandmother's house a bit tricky to locate. It helps, of course, to know where you're going," I continued jauntily, "but it is more about whether the house wants to be found or not."
"Please tell me that you're joking." When I gave no indication that this was the case, she yelled in outrage, "You are tearing through the woods, dragging me along looking for a house that might decide that it actually doesn't want to be found, all to visit a mysterious friend you've yet to reveal the identity of to me!"
"That's the general idea." I admitted.
"You're un-fucking-believable." Jane huffed. If she still had her knife on her at this moment, I would want to be somewhere far away.
I ran my tongue over my teeth and gave what could be construed as a laugh. "I get that a lot, sweetheart." The slap caught me off guard.
"Jeff, I get that I don't have a knife and that you do. I also fully understand my current position as loser of our fight, but if you ever call me sweetheart again, I will rip the skin off your damn face with my fucking fingernails." she sounded dead serious.
I smirked, enjoying our fun little game. "Whatever you say, sunshine." I dodged the inevitable smack, laughing madly. "We should be getting close." The house was apparently in a great mood tonight.
She made a disgruntled sound that was all guttural. "When you're trying to find a house lost to space and time, that means zilch." I looked behind me and raised an eyebrow at her constantly encroaching sarcasm as though the vocal inflection was a living entity before me. Jane made every effort to take no notice of my gaze, however briefly it was upon her. This was, of course, how I was assured of her attentiveness to my every move. She was still a wild animal despite the lack of physical violence toward me at this moment. I knew firsthand what she was capable of.
"It was a warning." I deadpanned. "It was supposed to be helpful."
"And what sad impression of me dictates I need a shitty ass helpful warning?" She glared at me with a killer's intent. It made shivers tag team up and down my spine, not unpleasantly.
"Just don't get me dirty when you throw up." I could feel the cold dead air dragging me in so tenderly that I almost started to wonder if the old mansion missed me. A sudden and agonizing jerk in my mind and stomach yanked me down and pulled me inside out. Jane's scream of pain was a delightful cacophony to hear. Everything vanished from my field of vision as I relaxed and waited.
We were suddenly on solid ground again as the black released us into a catacomb-like atmosphere. A retching from Jane warned me to drop her hand and move behind her as she fell to her knees and, just as I had predicted, was violently sick. Despite my previous indifference, I knelt beside her tenderly and held her hair back from her face as she expelled everything she had eaten within the last twelve hours onto the ground before her. "I puked the first time too." I whispered sympathetically as I smoothed her long, black waves down over her back and fished in my pocket for the cloth I used to clean my knife. I examined it for any obvious congealed blood, then handed it to her.
Jane looked at me resentfully but took it anyway. It was clear she felt like total shit after our trip and didn't want to move but I wasn't really in a coddling mood anymore, so I jerked to my feet and yanked her with me. "Can't you give me a minute? I just puked, you bastard." she protested.
"It's all complaints with you, isn't it?" I muttered in annoyance. "I don't have time to just sit around when we're already so close to the house. Don't you want to meet everyone?"
"Whatever. Just don't expect me to feel bad if you get hurt." Jane grumbled.
She followed me through the woods cautiously and I fought the urge to laugh at her. Who did she think was going to jump out at her? The fucking Rake? Then I did laugh, because that actually might happen here, and what's the point of holding back a perfectly good laugh? Just to see her reaction, I brought my fingers to my mouth and gave a piercing whistle. The loud bark of a dog made her jump nearly right out of her skin.
"What was that" She looked like she wanted to murder me for scaring her. You know, she always looked like she wanted to murder me now that I think about it.
"Relax." I said with a leer. "It's just Smile." As if on cue, a shaggy black and blood stained hound leapt out of the undergrowth with, as his name would suggest, a big, all too human smile. He barked excitedly and licked my hand, then turned to Jane and turned his head curiously. With a cautious bark, he crept forward nudged her hand, then laid down, exposing his belly.
Jane stooped and gave Smile's belly a good rub. She slowly started to smile, and soon she was laughing as Smile pawed her leg in an attempt to pet her back. "You are a very soft dog, Smile." As if understanding, Smile licked her hand and looked up at her with reverence.
"Oh come on Smile, I thought you liked me best!" My protests were not real, but they served the intended purpose. Smile got to his feet regretfully and, after one last sad glance at Jane, bolted off back to the house. "Come on." I reached out a hand to help her up. She ignored me and got up on her own. "Let's get to the house."
We broke through the tree covering at last and I looked up at the house fondly. Its wooden walls were made of old weathered planks and the roof of old pieces of slate. The porch was long, creaky in appearances, and did not look safe, but I walked up the stairs unconcerned. Jane followed at a more lurching pace, nervous about the surroundings and, most likely, me. I reached a hand to the door and was about to knock when the door swung inwards and I was hit with a gale force hug.
"Jeff! You're back!" Sally cried joyfully. I bent down and lifted the eight-year-old up until she could easily wrap her arms around my neck. I returned the hug, then ruffled her feathery brown hair. She looked at me with her bright green eyes and wiped a drop of the blood that was constantly leaking from the fatal head wound given to her by her uncle. "Me and Smile missed you, Jeff."
"I'm sorry for not visiting sooner, darling. I had-" I turned to Jane with a grin. "Other arrangements." I twisted my neck back around to Sally, who was holding Jane's knife and examining it as if she had never seen one before.
"This isn't your knife, Jeff." She looked at me like I had grown another eye. "You never use another knife."
I laughed at her adorable confusion. "It isn't mine, darling. That particular knife belongs to Jane right here."
Sally looked over my shoulder and shot Jane a death stare. "Where did she come from? How do you know we can trust her, Jeff?"
I laughed again. "We can't trust her. She has promised to stab me in the back at the first opportunity!" Jane shifted uncomfortably from left to right.
"Oh, that's okay then!" Sally exclaimed happily. She squirmed her way out of my arms and ran over to Jane. Jane took a nervous step back, but in the end, she was no match for Sally's hug. "We are going to be great friends!"
Jane looked at me as if begging for help. I smirked in response and said to Sally, "Come on darling, let's take Jane inside."
Sally looked back at me and smiled, showing off the little space where a baby tooth had fallen out before her death and was never replaced. "Okay, Jeff." She finally released Jane and grabbed my hand, intent on pulling me inside. I let her drag me away, only after turning to be certain that Jane was following us.
Once inside, I was met with red light and a familiar musty odor that hinted at blood and air that wasn't properly disturbed. I studied Jane's face carefully as Sally babbled on about this and that and 'oh we've all missed you!'. Jane was obviously out of her element, and it amused me to see her so on edge, how it allowed me to see another one of her faces.
Banging sounds from the upstairs and a small boy in green with black eyes ran down the stairs and into Sally. "Ben!" Sally wailed. "Look where you're going!"
"Sorry." Ben dusted himself off and moved the messy blond hair from his eyes. He then took in the occupants of the room with narrowed eyes that soon found the one that didn't belong. He stared up at Jane with an annoyed and confused expression. "Da fuck are you?"
"Ben!" Sally cried in horror, "Don't say things like that! That's a bad word. You could have just asked who she was normally." She looked up at Jane with a penitent expression. "I'm sorry about my brother. He learned bad words from Jeff."
"Hey!" I exclaimed with mock offense. "Don't blame me! I only use them sometimes, and only when they're useful." Technically it was true. I just found more uses for them than most people. "I would just love to discuss my word usage, but Jane has an appointment with the boss." I winked at Ben and Sally, and they grinned in understanding.
"Well, don't let us keep you." Ben bowed exaggeratedly for us and moved aside.
"Don't let him eat Jane, Jeff." Sally moved too but, her compliance was clearly more reluctant than her brother's.
"See you two in a bit." I walked between them and started up the stairs, but the lack of Jane behind me stopped in my tracks. "Jane, don't make this harder than it needs to be, because I will drag you up these stairs it I have to."
Jane moved in a trance and ghosted up the stairs after me. I led her down the dark, ominous hall lined with doors that were all shut tight and seriously pulling off that uninviting vibe they were going for. Jane was clearly regretting all her life choices as she followed me, jumping at every little thing that went creak. I laughed inwardly at how different our reactions were. She shivered at its creepiness and I grinned at its familiarity.
"I don't like it here. It feels so wrong." Jane ran a hand along the wallpaper as if looking for a secret door, or possibly just a way out.
My eyes were sent rolling. Why did she have to overreact to the smallest things? "Stop acting so fucking wimpy, Jane." I chided.
"Jeffrey the Killer," echoed a soft and slightly menacing voice from the door at the end at the hallway. "What have I told you about the usage of such coarse words under this roof?" The door swung outward to reveal a dark, tall figure without a face. His thin frame was clothed in a finely tailored suit and his arms were folded in an unhappy manner. Jane whimpered in fear from behind me.
"Hey, Slendy." I said casually, tilting my head to the side and staring up into the blank white head. "Long time no see."
"Indeed." Slenderman's tone was one of total disdain. "I never took you for one who breaks my rule about no strays, Jeffrey, but you have always been full of surprises."
"In my defense, Slendy, Jane the Killer is a special case." I licked the corners of my mouth and grinned at the frozen Jane.
"Good Lord, Jane, are you dressed in your pajamas? Did Jeffrey drag you from your bed?" Slenderman would have glared at me if he had eyes. "Jeffrey, I expected better of you." Slenderman looked back down the hallway we had come and, looking at Sally, said, "Ah Sally, will you help Jane the Killer find some proper clothing? I'm sure Clockwork has left behind some things that will fit her fine."
Sally ran forward to take Jane's hand and then dragged her away. "Back in a jiff, Slendy."
Slenderman walked into the office at the end of the hall and sat in the custom-made leather chair behind the desk. He gestured to the other seat and then folded his long white fingers before him. "Convince me, Jeffrey. Tell me why I should let Jane the Killer stay." The voice did not actually come from Slendy, rather it came from Hoodie, one of Slenderman's three proxies. Hoodie sat hunched over his yellow hoodie that he had gotten his name from, effectively hiding his face from view. Even though it was really him who spoke, it was Slenderman I faced when I spoke.
"She tried to kill me, Slendy." I leaned back in my chair and stretched my long arms above my head, at complete ease with my surroundings.
"She failed, I see." One long finger tapped the others slowly, as if unimpressed.
"She kills people because of me. She wants to save them from my games." I was extrapolating of course, but Slendy didn't know that. "She belongs here, plain and simple."
"I feel, Jeffrey, that you are leaving out something." I could feel his nonexistent gaze slowly fishing truth from my mental pools of blood. "Tell me, what is the selfish reason that drives this 'good work'?"
I felt my relaxed mood shift into an uncomfortable pause. "I just couldn't kill her. That has to mean something." I looked pleadingly into his blank face. "I killed my own brother, Slenderman. What could be so special about Jane that prevented me from just stabbing her? I don't understand why, but the fact stands that she is important to me, even if she wants me to die."
"Hmm." Slenderman got to his feet and paced slowly. The long tendrils that shot out from his suit coat waved thoughtfully in time with his feet. "Do you have affections for Jane?"
I balked at his question. Where the fuck had that come from? "No. I never said that, I just said I was interested in killing her, that's all."
"Hmm." He stopped with his back to me. In the light, he was the picture of the night. The man-monster that stood before me was the embodiment of all that went bump in the night. He had given nightmares as gifts and eaten people before we were even a thought. I could see that in him now, despite his questions about my emotions.
"She could be useful to us, Slendy." Hoodie had lifted his head up and was addressing Slenderman in his own voice. The red X's that served as his eyes had an almost reasonable tint to them. "Jeffrey might not always be the sharpest knife in the drawer, but he's right this time. I don't think this will end up like it did last time."
I shook at the detestable thought. Last time damn near killed us all.
Slender turned suddenly and called to the closed door behind me, "Come in, Jane. There is no need to listen in."
Jane tumbled into the room wearing a tightly fitting knit dress and black hoodie. I wolf whistled just to piss her off. It worked. She rotated to face me stiffly and gave me the universal I am going to fucking kill you look.
"It appears that you found something to wear, Jane." Slenderman remarked as he took his seat. "Please take a seat next to Jeffrey here."
Jane walked forward, never taking her eyes off of Slender. With surprisingly steady fingers she pulled out the chair and delicately placed herself on the edge of it. "I'm sorry sir, but I am still confused as to what I'm doing here."
"Please, call me Slendy, Jane. To answer your question, you are here to tell me who you are." Slenderman splayed his hands on the desk and froze in that unnerving position.
"I'm here because I lost, Slendy. Jeff beat me fair and square, so I unwillingly followed him to your little haunt." Jane showed no glaring sign of being scared, but I could see the steady drum beat that her fingers were beating into her leg.
"I see. What do you think about Jeffrey?" Slendy's question seemed redundant after what I had told him, but I knew he wanted to see her personality through her answers more than anything.
"I hate him." she blurted out. "I want to murder him at the first opportunity!" Her rage was already threatening to overflow. I could almost see the mental checklist Slenderman was filling out. No patience, full of anger, and very certain.
"Ah, and looking back on the fight you two just had, are still sure killing him is in your best interests?" Slender leaned forward almost imperceptibly.
"I- I think so." Jane sounded indecisive. Not actually that sure of herself.
"If you had to, would you protect Jeffrey?" I was on the edge of my seat now. What kind of a shitty question was that?
"I don't know." Jane was intently focusing on her lap, unable to meet either of our gazes. "Yes, no?"
"Very well. Jane, I would like to offer a place for you here. I say offer, but I am sure you understand it is an order you will obey. You must stay in this house for a week. During that time, this house will slowly become accustomed to your presence and will form a bond with you. Once this bond is formed, you will be forever drawn to this house and will come back whether you want to or not, because it will be your home." He would have smiled if he could have. "Yes, we are brainwashing you. You will be taking up residence in our little Sally's room. For future reference, what I say is law here. You should probably get used to it now. That is all, you may go."
I grabbed her arm once more and half pushed, half dragged her from the room. As the door shut behind us with no obvious person moving it, I hardly heard Jane's half muttered, "Well, fuck."