"I still feel angry." Alex said. "Don't be such a fool. That man sacrificed his freedom for a hairy teats joke that wasn't even yours. Does that not mean anything to you?" Nick asked him as they walked down the hall. Alex snorted. "Quite frankly Nick, no. No it does not. He chose to commit a no doubt terrible crime. And what did he get? An awesome 'Yo Mama' joke. Fuck this game… Hark!" Alex's ears perked up. "Oh dear. You have that gleam in your eyes..." Nick said. "I hear the screaming of a vulnerable teenage girl." Alex sniffed. "Eighteen. Caucasian. Blue eyes. Pink hair in a bun with a gold clip… Blue dress. Lace, with some silken material." Alex said, almost robotically as his eyes flickered.
"How you can possibly detect this stuff is lost on me." "Well, yeah. You're only human." "Alex… this happens all the time whenever a hot/cute/pretty/beautiful woman is in trouble. Whether you're human, or not. It happens." "…Well yeah. You're only human." Alex repeated. "Now come on, Nick! The hunt is on!" Alex said as he raced to the source of the noise. "Hey, wait for me!"
A woman, befitting Alex's description was there. It appeared she was going to fight two knights. "Oh, come on! She actually looks like the way you described her!" Nick shouted. "I have yet to have a scratch on my record." He said. "Anyway, can we get to rescuing her already? I mean, I can handle a corpse, I guess, but I prefer them alive…" "Yes, Alex. We can get to rescuing her… Why do I have a feeling this is going to end badly?"
The duo managed to slay the two knights. "Kick some damn ass!" Alex exclaimed. Nick was struck by a vase on the back of the head. "Gaah!...Alright. You, pink haired woman. Why did you do that?... Or better yet…" Nick faced Alex. "Why didn't you warn me?!" "I thought you were going to kill me!" the pink haired lady exclaimed. "Well, I'm not. What's your excuse?!" Nick asked Alex loudly."I just like to see you get hit by pottery. It's a guilty pleasure." Alex said, grinning. "Ugh, fine."
"Alright, Madame. I understand that our appearance is shifty, our goals dubious, and our reasons for being here enigmatic, but we need your help." Alex asked. "With what?" "I'm freakin' starving. Can you take us to the kitchen?" "Sure! Mind if I get changed on the way?" "That only depends on if I can help you…" Alex purred. "Sure! You can help me get to my room! Come along!" "I…Er… That wasn't exactly what I meant…" Alex said puzzled as Nick and him followed behind her.
"Here's the kitchen." "Thanks." Nick said as he grabbed an egg and cracked it on the counter. "So, what's your story?" he asked, peeling off the shell. "I am trying to warn Flynn about something terrible…" she said. "Of course! That explains everything!" "Explains what?" she asked Alex, confused. "It explains why you didn't want to have sex with me! You love me so much, you didn't want to give me your AIDs!" "I figured the fact that you were a dog would have something to do with it." "…Once more, my canine aesthetic appearance has foiled me again…"
All of a sudden, a black shadow groped behind Nick and slashed. He managed to dodge it. "I am Zaggiii!!" the being snarled. The woman screamed. "And I am getting the fuck out of here!" Alex yelled. "Alex!!" Nick yelled. "Piss off, pal! You're on your own!" "Now, die, Flynn!" Zagi yelled. "Flynn? What the fuck? Hey!" Nick dove out of the way of the killers blade. "So, Flynn… I hear you're pretty famous! Eheh! I'd sure like to get a signature on my blade in nice red ink!" Zagi squealed.
Alex ran up the buffet counter, grabbed a tray of hot chilli, and projected it into Zagis face. The killer screamed as it burned his face. Alex took the hot metal tray out of his face and swung it around to knock out his legs. "Nick, Unison Attack #59!" "Alright!" Nick grabbed the sharpest looking knife out of a drawer and passed it to Alex, who jumped as far as he could off of the counter. "Now, repent! Indignant Stabbity Judgment!" Alex caught the knife by the hilt in midair, and stabbed it into Zagis chest. "Fatality Lightning Stomp!" Nick walked up to Zagi, and lifted up his foot before bringing it down on the knifes hilt as hard as he could. "...Really, Alex? 'Indignant Stabbity Judgment?'"Nick asked him. "It sounded epic in my head… Anyway, lets get the fuck out of here!"