Disclaimer: TMNT does not belong to me, and most likely never will...the world is a cruel, cruel place :(
Author'sNote: I noticed that the symbols I used to separate sections didn't show up in the last chapter. Sorry about that! Hopefully they will this time.
Two years later
Tiptoeing through a silent lair into a dark room lit by a single candle. Gentle touches, soft whispers, unbridled passion. Soaring higher and higher, until it seemed like nothing could ever reach them, happiness and pleasure like he had never known before…
Leonardo felt himself drifting out of his dream. He tried to cling to its fading remnants, but found the pull of the waking world was just too strong. The memory of his first night with Donatello was one he wouldn't mind reliving over and over again. Two years later, it was still one of the sweetest memories of his life.
He gently reentered the waking world to find soft fingers absently stroking his forehead. The motion was soothing and Leo reluctantly opened his eyes. His head was pillowed comfortably in Donatello's lap and he gazed up into his brother's serene face. Don was engrossed in a book he held in his other hand. The book had a hard red cover with gold letters fading on the spine and front. The pages were yellow and crinkled and Leo had no doubt that Don had found it on one of their scavenging trips.
They were in Don's room on his bed. It was the weekend and practice wouldn't start until late in the afternoon so that they had a chance to sleep. If the brothers were honest with themselves, it was mostly so that Splinter could get some much needed rest. As they grew older, so did he.
Leonardo assumed that it wasn't very late because Michelangelo had yet to enter the room and warn them that the others were up and about. Leo smiled at the thought of the orange banded turtle. Over the years Mike had been a great help in hiding the evolving relationship between Leo and Don. Leo knew he owed him a lot.
The elder turtle contained a sigh of annoyance at the thought of leaving Don's lap, but he knew he would have to eventually. Grudgingly, Leo began to sit up but suddenly his head jerked back and roughly returned to Don's lap.
Leo blinked and discovered Don looking down at him with a mischievous grin.
"Going somewhere?" he taunted, tugging again on Leo's bandana ties.
Leo grimaced, reaching up to touch the bandana around his eyes.
"I forgot I still had it on. How come you didn't take it off?"
Don's grin softened and he gently began to stroke Leo's forehead again.
"Because it makes you look sexy, blue boy."
Leo laughed quietly.
"Oh so I don't look sexy without it?"
"It just adds to your natural sexiness."
"Stop flattering me, Donnie. And what's with you calling me blue boy? You've never given me a decent explanation."
"Alliteration."
"I've heard that before. So you wouldn't call me yellow boy if I wore a yellow bandana?"
Don snorted.
"Of course not. Yellow boy doesn't sound as good as blue boy."
"Whatever you say, braniac."
"Mr. Perfect."
"Bookworm."
"Teacher's pet."
"Know-it-all."
"Arrogant stubborn-ass."
Leo laughed, clutching his chest.
"Ouch Donnie! That was a bit harsh," Leo pouted, "You always go straight for the kill. Have you no heart?"
Don smiled warmly.
"Actually I have two."
Leo felt himself blush as Don leaned down, giving him a peck on the beak before returning to read his book. Leo stayed where he was, letting his eyes wander from Don's face to the ceiling, which he began to examine as he let his thoughts drift. Donnie's last words stuck in his mind, giving him a warm tingly feeling he would never admit to. The side of his mouth quirked slightly as he thought of what Raph would say if he only knew. Probably beat me to a pulp for being a weakling.
His drifting mind settled on a memory from a year ago. They had escaped from the lair and returned to the rooftop where months before they had confessed their feelings to each other. It had been a cool night with only a few clouds and the sense of freedom at being away from possible prying eyes was overwhelming. It had been their way of commemorating the time that had passed since they had been together. Sure they weren't a normal 'couple' but they figured they should do something to celebrate. Leo smiled. The memory had been the source of Don's earlier words…
Leo was jolted from his reverie by Don bouncing his crossed legs.
"Mikey's knocking," he stated.
Right on cue another knock sounded on the door. Leo quickly sat up and slid off the bed. He unlocked the door and opened it, unphased by Mikey's head popping in as soon as the door was open a crack.
"Morning bros," he greeted them brightly. Don smiled at Mikey over his book.
"Morning Mikey," they both answered.
"Raphie's stumbling around the kitchen and I heard Splinter moving around in his room. I'm sure he'll be out soon. You should make your escape Leo bro."
"What time is it?" Don asked inattentively, returning to his book.
"About twelve-thirty."
"Ok Mikey, I'll be out in a second. Thanks again, for everything."
Mike turned to Leo, his eyes glinting. Leo stared in confusion as Mikey batted his eyes at him, his grin growing.
"No problem blue boy," he answered in a swooning voice, ducking out the door as Leo reached out to slap him. Closing the door, Leo turned and pretended he didn't hear Don chuckling behind his book.
"You're not going to give me the silent treatment are you Leo? I swear I didn't tell him to call you that. He must have overheard us sometime," Don finally closed his book, placing it in his lap. His eyes followed Leo as his older brother wandered around the room collecting his gear. Leo dressed in silence, then picked Don's mask off his desk and moved to stand by the bed.
He tried to keep a straight face as he handed Don his mask but watching Don tie it effortlessly behind his head and then grin happily up at him broke Leo's composure.
"No, I'm not mad," he sighed, giving Don a quick kiss on the forehead before walking to the door. He paused with his hand on the doorknob, turning to give Don a mock glare.
"But if Raph starts calling me blue boy it's over Donnie."
Don nodded solemnly, once again opening the book in his lap.
"Agreed o Fearless one."
"See you in a few," Leo replied before slipping silently out the door.
>> > > > > > > >
Leo was greeted with a familiar scene as he entered the kitchen. Raph sat at the table with his head in his hands, drifting in and out of sleep while Mikey whistled happily, wide awake as he finished making breakfast. Mike slid the dishes expertly along the table so they stopped in each of their respective spots. Don entered a moment later and Raph was suddenly wide awake stuffing his face.
This morning Leonardo remained silent, half listening to his brother's conversations. Their morning ritual was so familiar. It had barely changed over the years. He realized a lot of things in their lives were static, no matter how much time passed. Even at 21, the turtles still trained, patrolled, ate and lived together. Though no one was complaining, Leo often wondered how long this would last. Leo knew he was lucky, for he had seen more of the world than his brothers. Splinter was getting older and eventually he would be in charge of the family. But what would he do when one of his brothers voiced a desire to see the larger world? Would keeping them together, in their unchanging environment, be the best way for them to live? Increasingly Leo had been wondering who would be the first to leave…
His gaze slide from brother to brother, finally resting on Raphael. He realized then that Raph had stopped taking part in Don and Mikey's conversation and was staring intently at his empty breakfast plate. Leo knew a quiet Raph usually meant something was bothering his brother which would lead to him being in a bad mood the rest of the day. Something their ailing Sensei didn't have the strength to deal with lately.
Feeling Leo's gaze, Raph looked up. They stared at each other a moment, then Raph nodded his head ever so slightly towards the door. Taking the hint, Leo excused himself from the table and quickly headed towards the dojo.
Leo tried to keep his nervousness at bay as he waited for his brother. He hoped Raph would get whatever was bothering him off his chest and then be reasonable the rest of the day. For their father's sake. But Leo was worried that what was bothering him might be something he had brought up to Leo before. A couple of weeks ago Raph had cornered him after practice and asked if everything was ok with Donatello. Apparently he noticed Leo paying a bit more attention than usual to Don and thought that something was bugging their brainy brother. Leo had assured him everything was fine and Don was just a bit stressed out but Leo wasn't sure Raph had bought it. After that, Leo was extremely careful about the way he acted towards Donnie. Leo didn't think he was doing anything differently than he had over the last two years but there must have been a reason for Raph's sudden curiosity. Leo hadn't even told Don about Raph's question. What if Raph had finally figured it out?
The sound of the door closing made Leo turn. Raph stood motionless by the door, a frown on his face.
"We need to talk, Leo" he stated. Leo couldn't stop a lopsided smile from spreading across his face. Good ol' Raph, always straight to the point.
"Good morning to you too."
Raph glared at his older sibling and Leo sighed in exasperation.
"Fine, Raph. What is it?"
"Splinter asked me about you and Don again." Raph took note of Leo's darkening expression, the look making him more unsure about the current situation.
"What do you mean by again?" Leo asked. Raph folded his arms.
"Last week Splinter asked me if I noticed anything different about the way you guys have been acting. Yesterday he asked if I knew anything about it. He said he sensed something going on and was worried. I told'em I didn't know anything but I doubt he believed me. What the fuck's going on, Leo? I let you off the hook awhile ago but it ain't happening this time. Now that Splinter's asking questions you need to tell me."
Leo hesitated. His relationship with Raphael had always been complicated. Their teenage years had been the worse, full of fights and constant confrontations. Not that they didn't have the odd serious conversation, it just wasn't the norm. Lately those conversations had been taking the place of their arguments and Leo didn't want to lose that. It was like they were finally growing up.
"Why didn't he come to me or Don and ask?" Leo began slowly, "Why did he ask you first?"
Raph shrugged.
"That's what I said, Leo, but he seemed adamant about not mentioning his worries to you two," Raph paused, "it was like he was afraid of what you might say."
There was a brief silence and Leo could see Raph tense.
"Tell me the truth, Leo. Is Don…sick?"
"Sick?" Leo blinked in surprise, "no, Raph, Don's not sick."
"Christ, Leo, if you found out and think you're protecting the rest of us just admit it! He's my brother too!"
Raph clenched his fists, glaring at Leo.
"Raph, listen to me. Don's not sick. It's nothing like that ok? He's not dying or anything."
"Then what?" Raph growled in frustration, "I'm finished lying to Splinter. I'm not going to keep telling him everything's ok when I damn well know it isn't."
Options, plans, and lies whirled in Leo's mind faster than he could count. It wasn't Raphael's fault that he was getting mixed up in things and it certainly wasn't fair. He was just worried about his brother. The fact that Splinter was sensing something after all this time felt like a punishment to Leo for hiding his relationship with Don for so long. Now they were being pressed into either lying or admitting to everything.
"Ok, Raph," Leo sighed, "I'll tell you what's going on. But not now. I need to speak with Don first."
Raph waited for Leo to elaborate and when he didn't he snorted.
"Fine, Leo, pretend like you know what's best for everyone again. But if you don't tell me what's going on by tomorrow I'm going straight to Splinter to tell him something's definitely wrong. Whatever it is you're hiding, it better be worth lying to your whole family. Even Mikey won't forgive you for keeping secret something we should all know about."
Leo would have laughed at Raph's last words if the situation hadn't been so bleak. Before Leo could reply Don and Mike burst into the room closely followed by Splinter and a moment later their training began.
It wasn't as grueling as their usually training sessions. Splinter seemed extremely tired and Leonardo soon found himself giving most of the commands as Splinter silently looked on. When it came time to pair off and spar, Leo paired Raph with Don and led Mike away from Splinter before beginning. As the sounds of sparring filled the room, Leo moved closer to his brother.
"We need to talk Mikey," Leo grunted as his brother slipped out of reach.
"'bout what bro?"
Leo grimaced as Mike whapped him on the leg. He lunged forward,
maneuvering his brother so that his back was to the wall.
"Splinter asked Raph if anything was going on with me and Don."
"Yea I know," was Mike's whispered reply, "he asked both of us."
Leo was so shocked by the news that Mike was able to get through his guard again and Leo cursed silently as he flipped away, his shoulder throbbing. Soon they were close again and Leo voiced his anger.
"You knew Splinter was asking about us and you didn't say anything? What were you thinking?"
"I was thinking bro, that like always I would protect you two. I was throwing him off the scent. Don't worry."
The idea of Mikey always protecting them made Leo feel a pang of guilt. Wasn't it his job to protect everybody? Was his secret forcing his responsibilities onto his younger brother?
The pair finished their spar without further discussion. As usual when their training was done, his brothers left to attend to their separate tasks and Leo sat beside his Sensei to join him in meditation. As he began to meditate, Leo tried to ignore the feeling that his father was watching him more carefully than usual and his mind wandered back to his earlier thoughts about them each going their separate ways. It made his heart ache but at the same time he realized it might have to be done. It wasn't fair that he was the only one to ever travel far from home; to ever truly discover something about his character and resolve. The thoughts thinned to flimsy wisps as he entered deeper into meditation, where such worries were never welcome.
>> > > > > > > > >
It was late when Leo slipped stealthily into Don's room. As his eyes adjusted to the darkness, he was surprised to find the room before him empty. He was about to leave when a pair of hands gently gripped his waist and hot breath tickled his neck. Turning his head slightly in an effort to see Donatello, Leo frowned.
"Surprise," Don teased.
"Ninjas," Leo grumbled, receiving a chuckle from his brother, "I thought you might still be in your workshop. Don, I've got to talk to you."
"About what?"
Leo couldn't conceal a shiver as Don's breath warmed his neck again.
"Don, I'm trying to be serious here--"
"Well I don't want serious Leo tonight," Don interrupted. He tugged on Leo's bandana ties, tilting his head back.
"I want mischievous Leo to come out and play."
Something wet slid along Leo's pulse and he gasped.
"Really, Donnie!" he cried in a shaking voice. Leo quickly moved away from his brother, wearily watching him as Don advanced with a lecherous grin.
"Don wait!" Leo spoke fast as he cautiously stepped back, "Splinter may know about us!"
The statement stopped Don in his tracks, the grin wiped from his face.
"What do you mean?"
Taking a deep breath, Leo explained everything from when Raph originally questioned him to his discussion with Mikey. When he finished, Don sat on his bed with a thoughtful expression.
"What are you thinking, Donnie?" Leo asked, moving to sit next to him.
"I'm thinking you really know how to kill the mood, Leo."
Leo frowned.
"Don…" he warned. Don sighed.
"Well, we've got to tell Splinter. And Raph. It'd be best if we do it soon too. You said Raph was going to go to Splinter tomorrow if you didn't talk to him right?"
Leo nodded.
"Well then we'll have to do it early in the morning. It might be best if Mikey breaks the news to Raph while we talk to Splinter," Don smiled weakly, "that way Raph can't get to us to kill us right away."
The silence stretched between them and suddenly Leo felt like the weight of the world was on his shoulders. He knew Donnie was feeling the same and Leo wished he could take that from him. He slid closer to Don and snaked an arm around his waist.
"Don't worry Don, it'll all be fine."
Don didn't reply but pressed himself closer to Leo, as if the reassurance from his words weren't enough and he needed to be as close to Leo as possible to know they were true.
"I hope you're right," Don murmured. Slowly they rearranged themselves on the bed to sleep. As they lay there, they knew that night sleep would not come easily.