As she reached the end of the hall, she turned around to look at his door, far out of the reach of his peephole. She had an inkling that his day wasn't going to go according to plan, but she couldn't put her finger on why. She vehemently wished that he'd join her for the holiday, get to see what a real family is like. She'd been trying for years to do just that, but he was stubborn. She understood, in a way, why he'd politely declined all her offers: seeing a real family might only make him further regret what he'd been robbed. Her intention was surely not to upset him, though she realized her intention might not be tantamount to the outcome.
Her heart did ache for his misfortune, though she never let on. He couldn't stand pity, a fact of which she was well-aware. Being protective of oneself was something she understood, but feeling the need to be so secretive was not. Well, sure, she rarely mentioned her late husband, but Bobby wasn't ignorant to his existence. All she really knew about his home life could fit into the palm of her hand: his mother began to emotionally and mentally leave him at the age of 7; his father left his legacy with his fists and cruel words before walking out completely; and his brother was just as much a stranger as their parents. She couldn't even fathom how it was to grow up in the turmoil, or how he managed to turn out so well, so smart, and so kind.
The rumors that circulated dug deeply, as she knew they did for her partner, though he wouldn't show it. Some were based upon truth but greatly exaggerated, others were false through-and-through. He didn't make it easy for people to see the real Bobby…but maybe, she thought like the switching-on of a light bulb, that's just how he wanted it. If people were leery of him, thinking him schizophrenic and violent, they'd leave him alone. And if he was left alone…he wouldn't have to let anyone in. But she was left confused all the same because she knew he was lonely…and why would anyone want that? Maybe it's just what he's always known, and sometimes no matter how sad, familiarity was easier than change. She knew his fears of abandonment were deep-seated. He'd gone through enough people in his life to merit that fear. She, herself, didn't think she could take him at first, but she grew to understand, appreciate, and love him. And unless something massive and unforeseen presented itself, she intended to be his partner for the rest of her time on the force…and she'd never let him find out that she once thought of walking away.
Although at the moment she had to do just that, stepping down the stairs and out into the November chill. She caught a glimpse of him walking past the window just before she drove away…but she'd be back later.