A/N: CAN I JUST SAY ON HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU GUYS RIGHT NOW!? I MEAN – HOLY GAY TRENCH COAT! LOOK AT ALL THE FAVORITES, FOLLOWS AND REVIEWS FOR THE FIRST CHAPTER DAMMIT!
Me: Okay, I need to finish these goddamned assignments and finish up 'Misery Business' chapter 2 so that I could finally sleep in peace.
My alter ego: Ignore those two things and write something for Yuri on Ice.
Me: But –
My alter ego: Finish 'The Japanese Punk' so you could kill their ovaries.
Lmao I was having a hellish week of procrastinating to finish my assignments (yes, I HAVE A HELL LOT OF IT AND IT'S ONLY FROM JANUARY DAMMIT!) and you good people just made my day. I am #bless.
BTW, if any of you guys notice that this fic is also Archive of Our Own a few days before I posted this fic in Fanfiction; I actually forgot to post this in here to be honest since I am sleep deprived (I still am right now) so I easily forget about anything that suppose to be important (like my assignment like wtf I'm dying here).
...
Yuri has no idea what happened.
As usual, he went to the rink to practice and then, while he was warming out, he checked his Instagram and Twitter only to find out his life-long idol, Yuuri Katsuki is at Russia.
And he is at Russia for Yuri Plisetsky.
For Yuri Plisetsky.
And declared that he coached him for his senior debut.
Yuri felt like wanted to faint and also vomit, and also wanted to jump of a cliff. Yeah, that sound a good idea. He need to vomit first, then jump off a cliff and then faint. That's a good start for his death.
But his body cannot move, Yuuri's face is so close toward his face and he could feel his breath and he smells like strawberry somehow. Oh god, Yuri just met his idol and now he's commenting on how nice he's smells. He felt like a total creep.
"Oi, why the hell your face is so red anyway?" Yuuri asked, furrowing his eyebrows as he lean closer as their nose almost touched each other.
Yuri's face is all red now and his head spins as he fainted due the intensity of his life-long idol being so close to him.
"Ah, he fainted." Viktor cheerfully pointed out.
Yuuri raised his eyebrow in confusion, "What the hell is that about anyway? If he sick, I can't coach him in that kind of state." He pointed out with a huff as he crossed his arms in annoyance.
Yakov rubbed his temple for a moment before started to scream, "WELL THAT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE BEING FAR TOO GODDAMN CLOSE TO HIM BRAT!" He exclaimed.
Yuuri raised both of his eyebrows, "Oh, okay. I didn't know he was uncomfortable."
"ANYONE WOULD BE UNCOMFORTABLE IF YOU DID THAT!" Yakov screamed.
"Chill." Yuuri said smoothly.
…
Yuri woke up instantly when he felt cold splash of water splashed onto his face. He let out an incoherent girly shriek as he fell down from the bench where he lay down.
"I think you going overboard on that…" Yuri could hear Viktor said.
"But how the hell am I going to coach this little fairy if he asleep old man?" Wait, isn't that Yuuri's voice…?
Yuri slowly open his eyes, his eyes bulge out when he saw Viktor slumped down, obviously depressed while Yuuri was having a selfie with Viktor with a victorious smirk plastered onto his face.
"Yuri, you're awake." Mila exclaimed.
"W-what's Yuuri doing here…?" Yuri asked. "And why Viktor looked down…?"
Mila chuckles, "Did you forget already? Yuuri come here to coach you!" She said cheerfully, "Your idol is coaching you! Isn't that a dream come true." She said as she hugged Yuri, "And Viktor is being a drama queen for a moment since Yuuri called him 'old'."
"My hair is thinning isn't it Yakov…? I'm soo old…. I think I'm wanted to cuddle with Makkachin~ I need my baby…" Viktor sulked as he dramatically wiped his fake tears.
"Vitya, you haven't reached the age of 30 yet…" Yakov deadpan.
"See? Don't mind him." Mila said as Yuri just sweats dropped at the depressing atmosphere.
After Yuuri finish typing something in his phone, he turn his head toward to a depressed Viktor, "Hash tag Viktor Nikiforov is a real diva." He said as he gave them a devilish smirk, "Phichit is soo going to yell at me." He snorted.
Yuuri turn his head at Yuri who was blushing and also blinking rather confusedly at him. "So, ignore this over-dramatic drama queen here – "
"Hey! Georgi is the real drama queen!" Viktor pointed out.
"I heard that!" Georgi snapped from afar who was trying to practice his jumps.
Yuuri continue to ignore him nonetheless, " – If you going to be coach by me, I need to know something about you, like…." Yuuri trailed off as he swiped Yuri's bangs off his face.
Yuri blushed madly, 'I-Is he going to ask me about m-my-my l-l-lo-love life!?' Yuri internally shriek.
Yuuri let go off his face as he snapped his fingers, "Ah! Like what's your favorite food! I never ate any food from Russia so I'm quite excited to know what its taste like!" He said with a cheerful expression on his face. "I once eat Phichit's homemade Tom Yam and it's my favorite Thai's cuisine so I really looking forward on Russia's food." He said as he clasped his hand.
Awkward silence~
They all sweats dropped (except for Viktor who was still sulking on the corner but he still eyeing on them thought). All of them knew Yuuri's fearsome reputation as 'The Japanese Punk' and his inability on smiling (or what the SNS has said since he never shown smiling at all, smirking is not included). And now, here he was, looking happy with an innocent face.
Yuri was the first one who snapped from the shock, "Well, I like my grandpa's homemade Piroshky…" He said as he turn to Viktor, who got over by his dramatic sulking in the corner, played with a small poodle that oddly resemble Viktor's dog, Makkachin – wait, his name is also 'Victor'. "… A-and h-h-he-he always-uh….made it when I come to Moscow…" He stuttered when he felt Yuuri's intense glare getting more intense.
Yuuri let out a smirk, "I think I know just what to do. Vicchan, come here boy!" Yuuri called as the small poodle that was playing with Viktor barked as it ran toward Yuuri. Yuuri chuckles as he ruffles its fur fondly.
"That's your poodle?" Viktor asked in disbelief.
Yuuri nodded, "Yeah, got a problem with that?" He smiled at the poodle fondly.
"Not really but – " Viktor walk closer toward Yuuri as he lift Yuuri's chin and lean dangerously closer to him. " – I didn't expect you actually named your poodle after me, Yuu-ri. I thought our little Yuri here is joking about that your dog share the same name as me." He said rather seductively while Yuuri stare blankly at him.
Mila wolf whistled while Yuri gasped in embarrassment. Meanwhile, Yakov look like he's about to explode and Georgi, well… He's sobbing while muttering about 'young love' as soon he stepped off from the rink.
Unfortunately, the scene didn't last long, not when Yuuri kicked his chin as Viktor fall down. Yuuri glared at him, "Baka! It just a coincidence you fucker!" He yelled with a glare at the man before walking away from him with Vicchan.
Georgi cocked his eyebrow as he let out a snort, "Smooth Viktor, very smooth." He said as Viktor gave him a thumb up, "Worth it."
Yakov rubbed his temple and let out a huge sigh, "Somehow, I feel like I'm making things worse…"
Mila laugh, "Worse? More like interesting~"
…
Yuuri's sudden appearance as Yuri's coach took the world to storm as the SNS has been flooded on why 'The Japanese Punk' suddenly took an interest on 'The Russian Fairy'. Many of Yuuri's fans mourn on unable to see Yuuri's skate this season.
Of because Yuuri and Yuri share the same name, all of them decided to call Yuri as 'Yurio' since it would easy to call them. At first they decided to call Yuri as 'Yura' but then, Yuuri mispronounce it as 'Yurio' and thought that he was calling Yuri after one of the member of the Japanese band that Yuuri's sister been obsessed about that oddly has the very same hairstyle as Yuri.
Viktor though it sound cute and declared that they should call Yuri as 'Yurio' instead, though Yuuri still call Yuri as Yuri (which he felt glad).
Yuri don't know if he should consider himself as lucky or not.
Yes, he's being coached by his idol/childhood crush (yes, he has a small crush on the Japanese man) and yes, he's living with him but yet, life has gone much more hectic more than before.
Why?
Well…
When Yuuri post a selfie of him and Yuuri himself, stating that he, Yuuri Katsuki, becoming Yuri's coach for this season. All hell break loose.
[A picture of Yuuri smirking with an arm around a flustered Yuri's shoulder who giving a very shy smile.]
❤ 60, 837 likes
yuuri-katsuki Becoming a coach for this Russian Fairy yuri-plisetsky
The SNS went wild after the post and Yuri's phone has been ringing with notification about Yuuri's decision on taking a season off just to become Yuri's coach.
Yuri didn't dare to open his SNS account for a while since he knew it must be filled with hate as he took Yuuri from the spotlight. After all, it's a sin to take Yuuri by himself. No, it's more like a suicide plan since Yuuri is also regarded as the most wanted bachelor (by males and females), next to Viktor somehow.
Yuuri doesn't seem to bother by it a single bit at all. He look calm and collected when his phone rang with notifications. But then, Yuuri's face turn into a frown when he receive a FaceTime call from Phichit.
Yuuri look like dead when he first see the call.
Yuri was warming out for his first time on being coached by Yuuri and he could hear Yuuri's mutter something about a 'stupid Thai hamster that pestering his personal life'.
But in the end, Yuuri answered the call anyway.
"Yuuri! The SNS is getting wild after you post that selfie!" The Thai boy exclaimed cheerfully as Yuuri gave him a very dead look, "Phichit, what the hell, I'm in the middle of being coach right now…" He deadpan, "And as far as I'm concern, I thought you need to prepare your skating routine…"
Phichit laugh, "Oh you do care~" He cooed, "Anyway, tell me. How's your protégé? Is he nice? Is he rude? Or is he the carbon copy as you? Wait, no, let me meet him, show me that fan boy of yours Yuuri." Phichit said as Yuuri rolled his eyes and sigh.
Yuuri called the blond over as he blinked when he saw Phichit who was gasping at him. Yuri blushed for a moment and gave him a shy smile, "Uh… Hi…?" He stuttered out.
Phichit squeal, "Oh my god, Yuuri! He's a pure cinnamon roll! Unlike you! People actually put sugar instead of salt! Oh shit Yuuri, what did you do to get this cutie patootie!?Wait, no… WHAT DID THE HUMAN RACE DO TO DESERVE THIS LITTLE ANGEL!?" Phichit exclaimed.
Yuuri rolled his eyes for the umpteenth time, "Why do I even hang out with you?" He groaned as he rubbed his temple.
Phichit scoff, "Because you're gay." He pointed out.
Yuuri raised his eyebrow, "What does that makes you?"
"Attractive."
"You have a terrible sense of humor…" Yuuri deadpan.
Phichit look offended, "Well excuse you! I have a great sense of humor!" Phichit exclaimed with a huff as Yuri sweats dropped.
"You're right! That's the best joke I ever heard!' Yuuri laugh.
Phichit gasped, "I'm filing the divorce."
"We're not married, or even dating Phichit." Yuuri pointed out. "But if we do, I want a divorce."
Phichit look offended as he turn his head to look at Yuri who was confused at their odd conversation. "Yuri – wait I mean the blond one fuck why you both need to share a name anyway? – Russian Yuri! Your father is horrible! He's doesn't even know we're together! What does those three years living together in Detroit mean to you!" He said dramatically.
"I.. uhh… D-Don't be-be m-mad…?" Yuri stutter.
Yuri heard about Phichit Chulanont of course. He's the Thai top skaters and also Yuuri's best friend. He is labeled as one of the cutest skaters and also, self-labeled 'Yuuri's Ultimate Wingman'. He heard that he was quite of dramatic but he did not expect him to be dramatic as Viktor.
"Yuuri, who are you talking to?" Speak of the devil, Viktor came and hugged Yuuri neck from the back to take a good look on Phichit in Yuuri's phone.
Phichit gasped, "Yuuri, you're cheating at me?!"
"Phichit, we're not married for fuck sakes. Stop being dramatic."
"Did you found a new best friend and Wingman!?"
"Oh god, Phichit. I just came here for fuck sake. Stop being a drama queen will you!?" Yuuri yelled out in annoyance.
Viktor look confuse as he turn his head to Yuri as Yuri just shrug his shoulder, telling him that he has no idea on what happening.
Phichit pouted, "Fine." He huffed, "Detroit is boring without you… And I already missed your screaming and yelling at me… And also Victor cute face – I'm sorry but not you okay Human Viktor – and also our bromance in here…" He said.
"Phichit…"
"And most importantly, WHO'S GOING TO BE YOUR WINGMAN IN RUSSIA!? Are you meeting anyone there? More importantly, did you sleep with anyone there? This is important Yuuri, as your Ultimate Wingman and also your bro, I need to know everything." Phichit demanded.
"THAT'S WHAT YOU CONCERN!?" Yuuri scream.
Viktor laugh, "Well, Yuuri isn't meeting anyone here." He answered.
"Well, that maybe because I just got here! I haven't even put my clothes away from my bag Phichit!" Yuuri pointed out.
"But who knows! You might meet THE ONE!?" Phichit exclaim, "Imagine this, Yuuri Katsuki going to Russia to coach a rising star in Russia but only to find his one true love!" Phichit said dreamily.
"Sound romantic." Viktor smiled.
Yuuri make a gagged noise, "Ugh, gross." He pointed out.
"Or maybe that person is close to you~" Phichit teased as he winked at them.
Yuuri rolled his eyes, "You know what, and I'm ending this call. Sayonara Phichit." He said as he pressed the end call despite Phichit's protest.
Yuuri elbowed Viktor aggressively before throwing his phone into the duffel bag which Vicchan snuggle next with. He later on turn his head with a smirk while Yuri helping Viktor on getting up. "Yuri, tell me all your jumps and spins that you can do." He said.
Yuri accidently let go of Viktor with a 'thump', "M-my-my j-jumps?" He stutter out since Yuuri is too intimidating for him to handle.
"Did I fucking stutter?" Yuuri raised an eyebrow, "Yes, all your jumps that you can land."
Viktor stood up as he childishly glared at the blond who apologize at him. "Yurio, how could you." He gasped as Yuuri rolled his eyes. "How about you go ahead and practice and mind your own business baka." Yuuri said as Viktor pout before he went inside the rink begrudgingly.
"I-I can do the quads thought… And I'm pretty good with my combination spins." He stutter out as he avoid looking at Yuuri's face.
"You can do the Biellman Spin too right?" Yuuri ask as he cross his arm.
Yuri nodded hesitantly.
Yuuri let out a smirk, "I heard you have a fan club. Is it true?" He asked with a sly smirk as he lean closer toward Yuri.
"Y-yes…"
Yuuri smirk gone wider as finally give the poor blond some space. Yuri let out his breath that he didn't realize that he's been holding in for so long.
One of these days, Yuuri Katsuki would be the death of Yuri Plisetsky.
Yuuri clasped his hand, "I think I know just the right programs for you~" He said with a devilish smirk that could make Yuri willing to kill anyone he ordered (which may be Viktor Nikiforov) without any hesitation and even if he didn't order him to, he's willing to kill.
Oh shit, he felt like one of his own fan girls somehow.
Yuuri suddenly put Yuri's jacket around Yuri and shove his duffel bag on Yuri's arms. "So, how about you go out and calm your tits out while you taking Vicchan for a walk! You deserve a day off!" He said as Yuri screech. "B-but, we haven't practiced anything yet!" Yuri exclaimed.
Yuuri gave him an evil smirk, "Oh, you will get it alright. You'll start tomorrow for your training. I may be the five time silver medalist but I will make the gold medalist out of you Yuri-chan." He said as he shoved him outside from the building and put Vicchan's on his palm before closing the door behind him.
"By the way, you are not allowed to enter this building until tomorrow Yuri!" Yuuri yelled as Yuri let out a girly shriek.
"Wait, who's going to show you the way to Yakov's house!?" Yuri screams.
…
Reviewers replies:
SnowyLife12: Idk why, but I can help but to imagine you clapping your hand while crying… BUT I'M GLAD YOU LIKE IT!
Little Miss Pumpkin: I'm glad you like the pun! And isn't 'Sunbae' means something like 'senpai' or something in Korean? And English is my second language lol. And good night! (It's night time at my country anyway).
Guest: OH MY GOD! YOU THINK THIS CUTE?! I am flatered because I wrote this when I am still sleepy af and I don't even know if it funny or not. Not to mention I forgot to post this in after I post it on Archive of our Own! *sweats drop* I seriously needed coffee…
Midnightsky0612: Omg, chill. I'M GLAD YOU LIKE IT!
Hinatayuuri: Oh shit, I am really glad you like it! I hope you enjoy this chapter 2!
…
I am flattered by all of your reviews! As the token of pure gratitude, I hope you enjoy some vicious fluff! I'm happily killing your ovaries for you! Thought I'm not exactly proud with this fic but oh well.
Please leave a review! If you're about to leave an asshole comment, you can go fuck yourself! *smiles*
Peace Out!
Gloomy-chan.