Day 18
Today is my birthday. Kurt bought me roses. Told him I wanted a laser recalibration instrument instead. Am thinking of breaking up with him but am too horny.
V. pretty today.
Day 20
Kurt bought me a laser pointer. Apparently doesn't understand sarcasm. Informed him he is an idiot then broke up with him.
Pints of Chocolate Fudge Ice Cream consumed: 0.47 Status: still horny
Day 24
Found new apartment across the city. V. nice. Need to find guy with higher IQ then a poodle.
Day 37
New neighbors: 2
Tall neighbor def. has IQ higher then a poodle. Showed me his "white board". I think that's nerd talk for "I want to rip your clothes off and take you on the sofa." Could be mistaken. Better not assume.
Am V. horny.
Day 42
Pints of Chocolate Fudge Ice Cream consumed: 0.63 Prospects: 0 Clothes: intact
Tall neighbor (aka Sheldon) impervious to my charms. Might he be gay? Met other two nerd friends, Raj and Howard. Def. gay.
V. depressed. V. horny
Day 49
Played Halo. Beat Sheldon. Called me attractive. Def. not gay.
Update: still horny, but really, really pretty.
Day 55
Displayed ample cleavage today. Sheldon did not jump me despite being not gay. Will have to rethink strategy.
Sexual frustration reaching new high.
At least I'm pretty.
Day 115
Panties stolen: 16 Panties retrieved from telephone wire: 14 Panties missing: 2
Purple panties are stretched. Suspect someone has been trying them on. Find this strangely erotic.
Damn it! Am now horny.
Day 150
Gave Sheldon present. Got hugged in return. Go me!!
Day 159
Raj and Howard definitely gay. Think Leonard might be gay too. Caught him looking at Sheldon's bum.
Still have not been jumped by Sheldon. Am still horny. Checked the mirror, am still pretty. Perhaps borrowing Raj's hair conditioner might do the trick?
Pints of Chocolate Fudge Ice Cream consumed: 0.9
Day 160
Used conditioner. No effect. Hair is v. smooth and silky though.
Day 182
Think Sheldon is making moves. Gave me questionnaire with strange questions. Unsure, will display cleavage and see what happens.
Day 183
Prospects: still 0
Displayed cleavage. No result.
Still unsatisfied. Still pretty.
Day 187
Caught myself looking at Howard today. Yuck. Am not that horny.
Besides, Raj will kill me if I tried anything.
Day 213
Found out Sheldon is going to Antarctica. Will invest in webcam. Might be interesting. Maybe he'll jump me before he leaves?
Day 223
Did not jump me. Am still horny. Will be a long summer.
Day 256
"Accidently" left webcam on while I changed into work uniform. Think Sheldon saw. Go me!
Day 257
Found out Howard saw. Am V. disturbed. Supermarket was out of Chocolate Fudge Ice Cream.
Day 258
Received rude email from Raj stating the irresponsibility of leaving webcam on while changing.
Will be putting cheap store bought conditioner in expensive conditioner bottle when he gets home. Ha!
Day 311
Boys come home tomorrow. Maybe Sheldon will rip my clothes off.
V. horny.
Day 312
Clothes: ripped
Yay! Go me!!