The Adventures of Elevator Lance:

Indiana Lance

It had been one week since Nanny beat the hell out of Lance in the elevator and though the physical wounds had healed, the emotional ones were still festering. But alas, it was time for Lance to go to work and at work he was determined to be.

As he was leaving his quarters, Lance was approached by Keith.

"Hey Lance, I just saw the review, season 3 is off to a great start."

Lance walked with Keith down the hall. "Thanks, but did you hear the news? This is my final season. The series is being cancelled."

"I'm sorry to hear that, no more elevator adventures huh?"

"Nope. After this season I'll be free of ninja mice, farting stormtroopers, wacky cross-overs that make no sense whatsoever, and the best of all…I'll be free of that annoying poodle."

"Then you can focus on just fighting Zarkon's robeasts," Keith pointed out.

"Yep, it'll be nice to get back to the simpler life," Lance said as he approached elevator.

"Crap! I left something back in my room. I'll catch up to you later." Keith turned and headed back down the hall.

The elevator doors opened to reveal an empty shaft except for a single rope dangling.

Lance sighed. "This is going to be one of those episodes, isn't it?"

Lance slowly began the decent down the dark shaft. A soft, stale breeze blews upwards. After what seemed like an extremely long climb down, Lance could see a faint glow penetrating the darkness below. He emerged into a small alcove with three stone walls and a dirt path leading out into the darkness.

Lance shivered from a cold breeze. "I wonder if Coran knows this is down here." Lance looked around and saw a brown leather jacket draped across the shoulders of a skeleton. "I guess you won't be needing this any more."

Lance removed the jacket from the corpse then lifted a burning torch from the wall. Slowly he made his way down the path. After twenty minutes, Lance cames to a 5 foot gap in the floor and a large wooden beam above.

"Great, now how do I get across?" he asked himself. He looked around and saw a whip lying on the floor, covered in layers of dust. "What the hell…" he said. After three tries, Lance finally got the whip to wrap around the beam, then held his breath as he swung across.

To his surprise, Lance landed safely. He left the whip attached to the beam, secured the handle to the wall, then continued down the path which was slowly winding itself further down. Soon, Lance came to a large open area with a strange white substance on the floor. After careful examination, Lance looked up to see thousands of strange flying creatures resembling pigeons fluttering above the ceiling. Looking around, Lance found another skeleton with a brown hat. Removing the hat, he placed it upon his head.

Very carefully, Lance made his away across the open area, careful to avoid from falling down in the pidgeon poo. On the other side of the area he found a few steps leading to a raised dais. Upon the dais he found a small golden statue of a mouse.

"How did this get here?" He looked around. "Well, since no one is around….I might get something for it off of eBay." He picked the statue up.

The small pedestal that the statue was resting upon slowly slid down into the dais. A mighty rumble caused Lance to panic and he ran from the dais. The pigeon like creatures became agitated and bombed Lance with their white droppings. The ground below Lance began to quake and stone blocks began falling from the walls and ceiling.

Lance slipped in the bird poop and landed hard on his back. A boulder dropped down beside him. "Holy crap!" He quickly got back onto his feet and ran back up the pathway.

Lance approached the gap in the floor. The sound of the ceiling crumbling behind him becoming louder and louder. He grabbed the handle of the whip and stepped back and pulled the whip tought. The beam broke free and fell, landing across the gap like a makeshift walkway.

"That works," he said with a shrug. Lance started walking across the beam but stopped when the beam starts to crack. "Uh oh…."

Lance leapt from the beam to the dirt path on the other side just as the beam broke in two and fell.

Rushing up the path, Lance made it back to the alcove and started climbing up the rope. Lance could hear the stone walls collapse beneath him. Though tired, Lance forced himself to climb up the rope. After another long climb, Lance came up to the first floor just as the doors opened. With barely any strength left, Lance pulled himself into the hallway and rolled onto his back on the floor.

Onlookers stared in disbelief at the dirty, smelly figure in front of them.

"Lance!" Allura said as she rushed over to him. "Are you…" she wrinkled her nose, "alright?"

" Do….I….look….alright?" He coughed, dust flying from his mouth. "Here, I found this." He handed Allura the statue.

"Oh my gosh! I can't believe you found this. Lance, do you know what this is?"

"Not really," he admitted as he wiped bird poop from his face.

"It's the famous Schokolade Maus Statua," she said.

"The what?"

Allura peeled away the outer gold, revealing it to be foil, to reveal a hollow, milk chocolate mouse. "The famous Chocolate Mouse Statue. I lost it when I was a kid before I could eat it. I can't believe you found it." Excitedly, Allura broke off one of the mouse's ears.

Lance looked up at Allura from the floor. "You're not gonna…"

Allura popped the chocolate ear into her mouth.

Lance did his best not to vomit. "I'm so glad this series is ending."