To the fine readers of I Am Strong, I'm actually quite overwhelmed by the interest people seem to be taking into this story so soon. I have a fair number of people who have signed up for alerts and an unimaginably larger number who have read this (Thank you, traffic stats). I'm sure some of them maybe read the first line and got bored, but there are still quite a few of you who did read it and enjoy it. I hope all future chapters receive a positive feedback from you.
-Lucy
I sat in the grass, hugging my knees close to my chest, as I waited. No tears flowed; I was stronger than that. Just another bad day, after all. He would be here soon. Comfort me, console me, treat me the way one should treat a human-being. Lost in thought, I didn't even hear him approaching. His lanky body left him unable to be quiet in the woods so I must have really been out of it to not hear him. He put a warm hand on my shoulder and sat down next to me. We were silent for a just a moment, taking comfort in each other the way we now did. For the last two months I had someone to talk to after school and someone to interact with. I told him my problems and he... well he gave me little tidbits of his. I knew he was hiding something but I couldn't really be sure what it was. I had decided early on in our friendship not to push him to tell me, but I was certainly curious.
"Saaya?" He said, breaking the silence. I shook my head. This earned the exact reaction I expected it to: surprise. "Who, then?"
"The gay kids," I answered quietly. They were so nice to everyone. Very compassionate and kind. But to me... they hated me. I revealed a light purple bruise developing just below my ear. "He missed," I explained. Ikuto's fingers were at the bruise in a moment. He brushed against it so lightly and then sighed.
"I don't understand why they are picking on you. They should sympathize with you." He scooted a bit closer and wrapped one of his long arms around my shoulders.
"There's a lot of reasons, actually. For starters, they think I'm a pseudo-queer. Not really gay, just tarnishing the gay name by having gay parents and being straight." I was rambling a bit because of how upset I was, but Ikuto knew what I was talking about. "And they think I should be gay since I was raised in a gay atmosphere. I just don't get it. They are always talking about how they want acceptance but... I don't know. I don't really want to talk about it anymore." Ikuto glanced at me sympathetically and then turned his face from mine.
"I told you that you should have coordinated your schedule with mine. I could be with you more. To... keep the jerks away." He wasn't looking at me, purposefully craning his neck in the opposite direction so as not to see me.
"We didn't officially meet until quite a bit into the school year, though." I reminded him, slightly annoyed at what he was doing.
"I wish I had said something sooner. Spoken to you, told you that I was sorry you were being bullied..." he trailed off. His thoughts were so hard to decode.
"I'm a pretty good actress, actually. It's not too difficult for me to seem okay when I'm in the pit of despair."
"Amu, there are somethings you just can't disguise." We lingered in silence once again, taking in the words the other had spoken.
"So you're a good actress, huh?" He said, changing the subject. I was so thankful he was good at being the first to speak. I had spent years training myself not to respond to people.
"A better artist. Oh, right! You've never actually seen my art, have you?" My mind already began forming a plan. I'd bring him home and he would see my art. I had a few pieces of him, a few of both of us, and some stuff he'd appreciate. In the two months we've been friends I had never brought him to my home.
"No, but we decided not to bring me to your house. Your moms wouldn't like that very much, after all." Oh. I had completely forgotten. Miya would probably shoot him and Asa would assume that meant I was straight and be depressed for a while... best not to get into that.
"Yeah," I said absently, thinking again about other things again. "We could go to your house. Stop meeting in the forest, fast-food restaurants and parks." My suggestion didn't sit well with him. He adjusted himself a little bit away from me and let out a sigh.
"I like meeting in various locations, though." He said light-heartedly. I knew he was trying to laugh off the tension and change the subject. He was good at that.
"Why won't you tell me?" He knew exactly what I meant, as always, and his face immediately went somber.
"The expression 'there are some things better left un-sad" comes to mind."
"Said." I instantly corrected. He looked at me with a puzzled expression. "You said un-sad. Freudian slip, much?" I laughed. I had explained to him a few weeks ago that a Freudian slip was when you said something you were thinking. Like if you were thirsty and also talking to someone about your daughter, you might say 'I love my water to death. We do everything together.'
"Maybe, what of it." He said, now cross. I mumbled something to myself and stood up. Quickly following my lead, because he didn't know what I was doing, I wrapped my arms around his neck and sat there for a few moments. I always felt safe in Ikuto's arms. Like the cruel words of the world couldn't hurt me if I was with him. And for a moment, my sore feelings were numb.
"I'm sorry, I'm busy talking about my problems when you're the one who had a bad day." He murmured, leaning his head against mine. His blue locks brushed against my forehead.
"I'm sorry I keep bringing up stuff that's obviously painful for you to talk about. Let's just forget this and go do something fun." I said, a light smile gracing my face. I didn't know of any girls who could hug Ikuto the way I could, and we were merely friends. For some reason we connected with each other in ways we hadn't expected when we met.
"Like... go to your house?" I broke away from the hug in utter shock.
"Miya would probably kill you and-"
"They're your parents. They love you. And if I make you happy they'll want me around." It wasn't necessary to add that he made me happy in a friendly way. Neither of us ever had romantic thoughts on our minds. Regarding the other, at least. Ikuto could have someone he likes... that would explain a lot. I made a mental note to ask him about it later.
"Well I... I guess that would be okay. I do want to show you my artwork..." So it was decided that we would go to my house. Today. My heart skipped a beat with every step as I pondered over my moms' reactions. Ikuto noticed and gave my hand a quick squeeze to show his support. I was genuinely terrified to see what my moms would say about him (I had never brought a friend home before, let alone a boy) and his steady hand was much needed. Of course, by the time we reached my house, I released his hand. It would add unnecessary explanations if they were interlocked. With a deep breath I opened the door.
"I'm home!" I shouted. Miya was in the kitchen and Asa was setting the table for lunch when they noticed Ikuto. Both of their eyes widened, Asa dropped a plate on the floor and Miya burned her finger. I rushed over to help, leaving Ikuto to stand awkwardly in the doorway. After everything was cleaned up, I brought Ikuto over to meet my parents.
"Moms, this is Ikuto. He's a friend from school." They exchanged nervous glances -Miya's was more frantic than nervous- and shook his hand.
"And when you say friend..." Asa began, eyeing his suspicious blue hair.
"I mean friend. As in more than an acquaintance, less than a boyfriend." They were both partially relieved by my explanation, but more than anything, disappointed in my friend's gender. Miya took an uncomfortable step back before returning to making lunch. Asa was the only one capable of communicating with him.
"Will you be joining us for lunch?" Ikuto hesitated with his answer, no doubt mulling over what would be the best thing to say in his mind.
"If i'm invited, I'd be thrilled to spend some time with Amu and formally meet her lovely parents." Asa seemed okay with this answer, and Miya even loosened up a bit, but it was obvious that they were still both unhappy.
"Before we eat," I interjected, "I'm going to show Ikuto my artwork." Miya shot me a warning glare but they still let us go up unattended. Needless to say, Ikuto was impressed. Despite my very few self portraits, he still said that I managed to capture the innocence that is apparently in my eyes. I told him he was spouting bull-crap. The ones of us, the many of us, were some of my best. He agreed. He also commented that my singular painting of him was the greatest thing he'd ever seen. I had to disagree. When we were called to lunch, the topic of my grades somehow arose.
"Mostly A's. A few B's. That's the only way you'll buy me more art supplies..." I mumbled the last part.
"And how about you, Ikuto?" Asa asked coolly. She was so smooth about casually slipping something into the conversation that she wanted to know.
"I have a four-point-oh average." He answered without looking up from his meal. I was sure my eyes weren't the only ones to widen.
"You said you had a lot of trouble with school!" I blurted out, forgetting my parents were sitting right next to us.
"I do. Not trouble with school itself, trouble with being inschool. The stuff they teach us is so simple and tedious. I actually wish they would be more challenging." Almost immediately after saying this his face went entirely red. He had, essentially, just said that school was simple and anyone who wasn't getting a perfect report card was an idiot. I knew this wasn't what he meant but Asa and Miya didn't.
"Excuse me, Ikuto?" Miya began indignantly. "You don't mean to say that Amu is inferior to you, do you? Because I certainly wouldn't say that she is." Miya and Asa were already exchanging angry glances. I knew I needed to clean this mess up quickly.
"Ikuto's a genius!" I exclaimed before even thinking. They all turned to me. "His sister goes to Seiyo Academy... I don't know why he doesn't, but both of his parents are rocket-scientists. His IQ is higher than Einstein's." After a few moments of mulling it over, my moms decided it wasn't so much of an insult anymore and let it go.
"That's interesting. What do you plan to do after high-school, Ikuto?" The atmosphere in the dining room changed dramatically when Asa spoke.
"I'm... not entirely sure. I doubt I'll go into the family business, though." He said, shaking his head. I'd get an earful the next time we are alone. He wasn't going to be happy that I lied about his parents.
"Well, we can't all be rocket scientists. It's understandable. Amu, we're finished here. As soon as you're done you can do what you'd like; just leave the dishes to us." I nodded and bolted with Ikuto as quickly as I could.
"We'll go for a walk right after I check my e-mail," I told him as I sat turn and turned my computer on. He decided to treat my room like an art gallery while I was busy and went back and forth from each painting with his hand on his chin, stroking an imaginary beard.
I found a few new e-mails, mostly spam. And then there was one from the National Museum of Art in Osaka. I had sent an application to them about four months ago. Some kids were messing with me about being a lesbian -even though I've never given that impression- and I went home from school early. While online, I saw an ad for an internship in Osaka. The idea seemed so perfect; No one would know my parents were both women, no one would tease me. I'd have a fresh new start and maybe even make some friends while I enjoyed living on my own. And, best of all, it was at an art museum! If I played my cards right, maybe I'd even get a job there! So, naturally, I sent in my application and forgot about it. This was all before I met Ikuto, of course. I was slightly hesitant to open the e-mail but my curiosity won.
Miss Hinamori,
We received your application and were very impressed. The National Museum of Art, located here in beautiful Osaka, has been searching for an intern like yourself. Excellent grades and behavior, talent in art, and a charismatic personality make you the perfect candidate. Before you make any hasty decisions, we invite you to visit the museum, have a quick tour, and talk with the head of the museum. All expenses will be paid and it is a guaranteed enjoyable time. You are permitted to bring one guest with you, should you accept. We look forward to your visit next Tuesday.
Sincerely Kim Yun, Internship Director.
I stared silently at the e-mail even after I had finished reading it. There were about a million thoughts clambering in my head, each one desperate for me to ponder over. Finally, I turned to
Ikuto.
"I... I got in." I mumbled. I was too quiet, though, and he didn't hear. "I got in!" I said, a bit louder this time. Ikuto turned to me and furrowed his brow as he tried to understand.
"To what?" I pointed him towards the computer.
"That's great, Amu!" He shouted. He was all smiles now and seemed genuinely happy for me. Suddenly, his face fell. "Osaka... that's seven hours away from Tokyo." I hadn't realize this until he said it. I knew it was far, but not that far. I'd stop being teased, but at what cost? Never seeing my parents or Ikuto? I couldn't live like that."I don't really want to think about this right now. Let's just go for a walk." I said quickly. I needed some fresh air to help me think anyways. Even though I knew I would lose everyone I cared about, the idea of not being bullied felt so much better.