I Don't think we're in Konoha anymore, Akamaru!
Chapter 2
Heya peoples! Yay! I feel so loved by all the reviews. Aha ha. Two of you guessed that Kakashi would be the scarecrow. Well, that was a good guess, and it tempted me for a long time, but it is WRONG! As for who the scarecrow is, you will just have to see. And please forgive me if my memory of the film is a little shaky. I haven't seen it for a year and I never read the book. So anyways, happy reading!
Disclaimer: I own Naruto. Really, I do.
Naruto: No you don't. Stop lying.
No, I don't. Well, it was a good try anyways. But not really. I don't own Naruto or the Wizard of Oz. Frank L. Baum I'm not. So sad.
Kiba was strolling past corn fields, following the yellow brick road like Glinda told him to. At first the munchkins had tried to follow him, but when he knocked Udon out with a brick, that stopped pretty fast. Now he was all alone, except for Akamaru. Pretty soon he saw a fork in the road.
"Damnit, to borrow Shikamaru's word for it, this is troublesome. Which way am I supposed to go now?" He said to Akamaru.
"You should go to the left, little boy" someone near him whispered.
"HOLY CRAP! WACKO JACKO ALERT! STRANGER DANGER!" Kiba started flipping out, making Akamaru wonder if Kiba had completely taken leave of his sanity.
"Or you could go to the right. So long as I get a good view of your ass" the voice said again.
"WHO ARE YOU? WHERE ARE YOU?" Kiba screamed.
"Psst! Little boy! I'm over here!" the voice said. Kiba located the direction it was coming from. He looked up to see Kankuro sitting on the fence post. Kiba fell over.
"Jesus Christ! I knew you were a child-molester, but that's just creepy!" Kiba pointed and yelled. Kankuro looked hurt.
"Why does everyone always say that about me?" he turned away. A black cloud of despair formed above his head and started to rain on him, smearing his makeup.
"BECAUSE YOU JUST CAME ONTO ME, YOU ASS! AND YOU WEAR MAKEUP!" Kiba yelled.
"It's face paint, baka, FACE PAINT! F-A-C-E P-A-I-N-T." Kankuro yelled. Just then a swarm of crows descended from the skies and started attacking him.
Kiba laughed a that. Unfortunately, that attracted the attention of the murder of crows. Half of them flew over to him and ripped off his clothes. Akamaru stared, meanwhile, trying to figure out how he got to be smarter than his master.
Something finally scared the crows off and Kankuro and Kiba were left panting in the dirt, Kankuro with one of his eyes hanging out and Kiba in his boxers.
"You know what? You're one hella sucky scarecrow" Kiba spat. Kankuro scowled and popped his eye back in.
If you really must know, I have Avephobia" he sniffed.
"A SCARE CROW who is AFRAID of BIRDS" Kiba asked. "You know what, you're just stupid"
"I know." Kankuro sighed. "That's why I wish I had a brain. My life would be so much better" and then Kankuro burst into song, singing "If I only had a brain" at the top of his lungs but trailing off halfway through into las with random inserts of "If I only had a brain".
Kiba was by now completely convinced that Kankuro had gone bat-crap crazy, if he hadn't been already. He looked around for some sort of guidance. And that's when he saw the cue card conveniently hanging from the branch of a nearby tree.
"Oh, in that case you should go with me to go see the wizard. He will surely have a brain for you, and I can go home… What?" Kiba asked himself.
"What's that?" Kankuro asked as the cue card was switched.
"All we have to do is follow the yellow brick road." Kiba finished.
"YAY! I'll go with you, little boy!" Kankuro yelled and threw his arms around Kiba, who realized that not only did he really NOT want to go anywhere with Kankuro, he definitely didn't want to travel with him in his boxers.
"Um… look… you got any extra clothes on you?" Kiba asked, trying to pry Kankuro's arms off from around his waist, where the puppeteer was currently stuck like a starfish.
"Yes, actually!" Kankuro replied brightly. He rustled around in his shirt for a second and pulled out…
"A DRESS." Kiba said dangerously. "No thank you… wait, why do you carry that around with you?"
"It could be spandex" Kankuro pointed out. "Then again, I wouldn't mind a half naked traveling companion."
Kiba found himself extremely frightened by the look in Kankuro's eyes. "Ya know what? I like the dress a whole lot, suddenly" He went behind a tree to change, rather pointlessly, and all the while he cursed Temari's giant fan.
He came out about ready to kill anything that moved. Kankuro didn't notice this and glomped onto Kiba's arm.
"If you're going to come with me there are gonna be a few rules" Kiba said between pants as he pried Kankuro off himself again. "One of which is you don't get to touch me. The other is that if you sing again, I will strangle you with your own intestines"
Kankuro nodded eagerly. Kiba sighed. "Well, let's get going" he said. "C'mon, Akamaru. C'mon, scarecrow"
And so the newly formed trio set off down the yellow brick road again.
A little short, but I put Kiba in a dress again, so I don't want any complaints. The dress will be a reoccurring theme, in case anyone was wondering. It will get destroyed and resurrect. There is no stopping it. Oh, it's the same Dorothy dress, by the way. Thank you to all my lovely reviewers! And please place bets on who the Tin man, who comes in the next chapter is. Except you, Maki. You already know who he is- don't tell. Thanks for reading, and please review!