A/N Hi, just wanted to say a couple things. Firstly, I'm new to this fanfiction thing, I've read a lot of them but this is my first time writing one. I would absolutely love to hear your opinions on my story, so please review :) Secondly, if I ever involve any of Lily's "galpals" in the story, I think I'll be using Mary MacDonald and Marlene McKinnon. I've been looking for what characters would be the most accurate and these two characters seem to work well. If you have a suggestion for a character from the book that would fit the part better, be sure to tell me! Thanks! Now, on with the story! :)
It had been months since I had last spoken to Lily. Our break up occurred over our Christmas holidays, and now, it was the day before our graduation ceremony. I gazed at her in classes and tried to catch her eye during meals, but by February, it felt like I was stuck in fifth year and it became obvious that Lily wasn't interested in mending things with me. So I went into a state of depression. But it didn't look like that on the outside. I refused to let anyone know that inside, I was truly breaking. The only ones who knew were Moony and Padfoot. Wormtail was never very observant and didn't notice that my smiles never quite reached my eyes, that my laughter was excessively obnoxious so that others wouldn't suspect that I was truly in pain.
I was back to my arrogant personality, and I was once again the "egotistical Neanderthal." I'm not completely sure what a "Neanderthal" is, but Lily always used it when she insulted me. I just wish she would insult me again, so that I knew she acknowledged my presence, but she did nothing of the sort. She focused on her studies and kept to herself and her small, close circle of friends. Sadly, approaching her friends about Lily didn't work either. Mary MacDonald, who was always so gentle, would send me a glance of pity. Marlene McKinnon, on the other hand, would shoot me looks intended to kill. I just wished I could get either look from Lily.
"Prongs!" A voice broke me out of my reverie. "Prongs! Are you alright, mate?"
"I'm fine, Padfoot. What do you want?" I snapped.
"Er, did you forget? Today is our last day at Hogwarts?! We need to do something wild! I mean, we are the Marauders, are we not?" Sirius flashed me a grin that I overheard girls describe as "scrumptious" . . . How I smile can be "scrumptious", I may never know.
"I don't know, Padfoot, maybe we should, you know, not cause a ruckus for once?" Ah, the calm voice of reason supplied by the one and only, Remus Lupin.
I stared at the ceiling of our dormitory as I heard Sirius's bark-like laughter erupt from the bed to my right. I sat up and turned to see my best friend rolling around on his four-poster laughing hysterically. He fell off the bed in mirth. He was still laughing and calmed down a few moments later. His head shot up from the floor to look at Moony and I who were seated patiently on my bed. "Wait, wh-why aren't you guys laughing? That was a joke, right Moony?"
"Sorry to break it to you, but I'm being completely serious," Remus replied without a hint of laughter in his tone.
Sirius's face lit up. "But how can you be Sir-"
"NO PADFOOT!" I yelled, cutting him off. "That 'Sirius-Serious' joke got old the second day of first year."
"Oh shut up, Prongs," he retaliated. "Anyway, on to a life or death matter, would someone care to explain why we aren't doing a prank on our last day at Hogwarts?"
Remus took care of this one. "You see Padfoot, I think we've already pulled enough pranks to last us a lifetime. And our children's lifetime."
"But Moony," Sirius pleaded.
"Sorry, no buts," Remus answered primly.
"Is this 'no prank' thing about Lily?" piped up Wormtail. Funny... forgot he was even there. At the mention of Lily's name, my face fell, and I quickly looked down, but my facial expression did not go unnoticed by Remus and Sirius.
"Wormtail, you bloody Hippogriff! What the devil is wrong with you?!" Sirius exclaimed at Peter who sat perched on a small stool in the corner resembling a young child who was put on time-out.
"Sirius! Don't yell at Peter!" Moony defended Wormtail.
"Oh come on, Moony! Like you weren't thinking it too!" Sirius pointed his finger accusingly at Peter. He was never fond of Wormtail and always wondered why we "put up with him." I admit, he was a bit annoying at times, but once a friend, always a friend, and Wormtail was no exception to my rule.
"Sirius, lay off him, mate," I said tiredly. "I think I'll go for a walk," I got off my bed and walked toward the door. I caught my reflection in the window, and I looked like I hadn't slept in days, which I hadn't. Thoughts of Lily kept me up at night. My messy, raven-colored hair was messier than usual, and dark bags hung under my glasses-clad, hazel eyes.
I walked downstairs into the common room. It was relatively early, most students would only just be waking up. The room was empty as I walked through. I reached the portrait hole and looked back to see a red haired girl asleep on an armchair by the fireplace. She was curled up in the chair with a book clutched close to her chest. Oh, Lily.
I turned to walk out through the open portrait hole, but at that moment, I heard a group of fifth year boys thundering down the stairs from the dormitories.
"Shut up, will you?!" I whisper-yelled at them as they reached the common room. I didn't want them to wake up my lovely Lily. I must have looked intimidating since they quietly scurried out of the room.
I made my way back over to the armchair that held Lily. I studied her peaceful face. I stared at the small sprinkle of freckles across her nose and her long dark eyelashes. I dreamed about her mesmerizing emerald eyes that were hidden under her eyelids. A piece of her vibrant red hair strayed onto her face, and as I brushed it off, I heard the soft clearing of someone's throat behind me. I turned around to see Sirius standing at the base of the stairs to our dormitories.
"You really love her, don't you?" Sirius asked me. I don't know why he asked. He already knew the answer.
"So much, it hurts," I told him.
"Listen, if the both of you really are meant to be, then one way or another, you'll end up together,"
"But when, Sirius? When?! I don't know how long I'll be able to live without her. After tomorrow, I won't see her anymore, we won't be able to mend things! I heard about her internship in France at their Ministry of Magic, she wouldn't pass that up. And I wouldn't want her to, but it's going to kill me knowing that she'll be moving on to greater things, to greater people, and I won't… I can't," by the time I said this, I was on the verge of tears.
My best friend's stormy gray eyes showed sympathy toward me, not pity, but sympathy. "I'm so sorry, I don't know what to tell you, James. I've never been in a position like yours, but I can promise that I'll be with you, and so will Remus, and so will Peter. You won't be alone, and soon enough, you'll feel better than you do now," he looked me straight in the eyes before giving me a small smile and returning to our dorm.
I looked at Lily, and whispered to myself, "Yeah, I'll be better."
What did you think? I'd love some constructive criticism! Next chapter will be up by next Saturday at the latest :)