Disclaimer: Undoubtedly do not own any of Grey's characters. Likewise, writing this story to get a few scenes swirling around in my mind on paper, and intended purely as therapy. I've paid lots more attention to detail in the other five stories written.

Thanks to the nine of you that commented, not sure where this will go, but if you've read my other stories, it's surely about the love and commitment to each other and very likely, scenes we will never get on Grey's. There were three things I knew when I decided to write this: that Shonda's comment about Mer's miscarriage was a load of crap (hence the voice over; that I have no medical knowledge, in spite of doctors in the family and Dad's two open heart surgeries…and the other… you'll see in this chapter in regard to other's reaction to the miscarriage. A possible fourth idea…is playing around in my head…we'll see, but if you have read Shattered Dreams, you won't be surprised.

Thanks for reading, if you don't find that this is a load of crap writing…and feel generous about leaving a comment, it would be greatly appreciated, and help to decide how much time/effort to devote to this and if it makes sense to continue. Warm regards, Jasmin

Obliterated Hopes – Chapter 2

"Mer," Cristina called out startling her, optimism discernible in her tone.

"Huh…" Meredith turned toward her friend, quickly placing the once hopeful display of their unexpected child behind her.

"Derek's asking for you."

"Ok," Meredith said softly and watched her friend walk away, then taking a deep breath, she paused, her expression one of absolute heartbreak and devastation. She seemed paralyzed for a moment, attempting to come to terms with her loss, and as if needing to eliminate those miniscule moments of hopes and dreams that had suddenly manifested before her, she discarded the once positive result; discarded the evidence that within hours had turned to obliterated hopes.

Cristina, if she had seen her, would have realized that something had gone horribly wrong, because she'd just saved her husband and she had baby news to share, but the hollow sadness in her eyes did not reflect the joy of her husband's survival.

Derek, if he had seen her, would have immediately recognized the immense sadness reflected in her gaze, and done whatever was necessary to get her to talk. He'd get feelings, he'd once told her, where he knew what was about to happen next; he'd have known his wife was hanging on by a thread, attempting not to fall apart. Derek, if he had looked up at her as she stood in front of him earlier that morning, instead of focusing on the paperwork, would have seen a very different look in her eyes; they'd never looked so blue and bright as she smiled at him, a secret smile that held extraordinary news.

"You said he was asking for me," Meredith whispered almost accusingly to Cristina who had returned to the small enclosure of the cardiac care unit and was monitoring Derek.

"He did," Cristina told her, "but, you know he's going to be sleeping most of the time, and you needed to be here when he wakes up again."

"He…" Meredith took a deep breath, her heart racing and before a permanent lump lodged in her throat, she whispered, "Cristina…he…almost…I almost lost him…"

"But you didn't," Cristina said, "and…when he wakes up...you're going to give him great news," she smiled at her friend, and before she could say anything else a nurse walked in the enclosure, giving Meredith a moment of privacy as she closed her eyes and took several deep breaths while she attempted to deal with the reality of her loss.

Cristina gave the nurse precise instructions for Derek's care over the next several hours, and completely missed Meredith's reaction to her comment. She turned to look at Owen who'd just walked in the room and read over the chart, agreeing with her instructions, and discussing some added precautions in regard to his treatment.

"How is she doing," Owen asked Cristina as he glanced over at Meredith who was leaning into the railing of the hospital bed, watching over Derek.

"She's fine," Cristina told him. "She's going to be fine."

"Has she seen a doctor?"

"No," Cristina said, making the assumption he spoke of the pregnancy, the existence of which she believed saved Meredith's life. "She just found out today."

Owen looked at Meredith, her hand on Derek's forehead, gently pushing back his hair, as she'd done over and over in surgery, and then at Cristina and her comment sank in.

"Cristina," Owen pulled her aside gently, "has she talked to you?"

"Of course," Cristina whispered with a soft smile, "she said I was going to be the godmother."

Owen looked over at Meredith again, and took a deep breath. He'd have to break the news to Cristina. Evidently, since the surgery, Meredith had not said anything to her about the miscarriage "I need to talk to you," he said quietly and motioned for her to join him outside.

"Mer," Cristina walked over to her before following Owen, "he's doing well…all his vitals are good."

"I know," Meredith whispered, her gaze remained fixed on the pale, still body of her husband.

April Kepner walked up to Owen as he stood watching the two friends talk, and Cristina touched Meredith's arm in reassurance. "Dr. Hunt," the young woman said, "I brought this for Dr. Grey," she held a styrofoam container, "it's soup…she…she lost a lot of blood and she needs…"

"April," Cristina interrupted, "who lost a lot of blood? Are there more people hurt than I know about?"

"April," Owen said, "it's very thoughtful of you. We'll make sure she eats."

"Owen," Cristina asked, "what's going on?"

"Dr. Hunt," April's eyes watered remembering the moment Meredith had told them she was having a miscarriage. "She should see a doctor…"

"I know," he nodded, "she will. You need to go home. It's been a long day."

"Reed's parents are coming," April told him. "She was my friend. They shouldn't be alone when they see her."

"Owen," Cristina said, "April…what's going on?"

"Cristina," Owen said, "let's talk away from here," he placed a hand on her elbow, intending to speak to her alone and privately.

"Owen…tell me now…" Cristina saw the look exchanged with April before she walked away, and demanded, "Owen…what is going on?"

"It's Meredith," he said quietly.

"Meredith…she's fine…she's…" and April's words dawned on her, and she looked through the window of the critical care cubicle. "Owen…" her gaze searched his.

"Let's find some privacy," he whispered.

"What is wrong with Meredith?" Cristina asked again.

"While she looked at my wound," he cleared his throat and glanced over at Meredith, and was in awe of her strength as she stood by Derek's bedside, "she …" he closed his eyes for a second, shaking his head, almost in anger. "Cristina," he said quietly, placing his unrestricted hand on her arm, meeting her gaze, "she had a miscarriage."

Cristina's eyes filled with tears; rarely did she display her emotions, much less in public. But he knew, this news would affect her deeply, in spite of her personal views, which he was still trying to understand and now it was the woman she considered her person, her sister that had suffered a devastating loss. "No…" she whispered, "no…Owen…" their gazes remained locked, her eyes filled with sadness as she looked to her friend, and then, "Owen…" her tears flowed slowly down her cheeks, "not this too…"

Owen gathered her close to him, uncaring of the pain it caused, as he placed his free arm around her and she buried her face in his chest, her quiet sobs for her friend's loss a true reflection of the depth of the friendship between them. Cristina Yang, for the first time ever, allowed her emotions to flow freely in public, as she allowed the man she loved to comfort her before she had to face her friend.

"Meredith," Cristina walked to her side, "Meredith," she said again, when it was obvious her friend had become lost in her own thoughts.

"What…" Meredith turned to her, and their eyes met, and Meredith's filled with tears.

"Mer," Cristina whispered, and their gazes held, and in the silence that ensued, Meredith knew that her friend also mourned her loss.

Meredith pursed her lips and closed her eyes, tears falling freely, and then she felt Cristina's arm around her and sustained her weight, when all Meredith wanted was to crumple to the floor and sob.

"You need to see a doctor," Cristina told her. "Now."

"I'm not leaving him," Meredith told her. "I should have been here before."

"You had no idea when he'd wake up," Cristina reasoned with her.

"I'm not leaving," Meredith said defiantly, Derek's hand in hers.

"Then," Owen told her, "neither are we."

"You will at least sit down," Cristina told her.

"I'm fine."

"Meredith," Cristina said, "do you want me to worry about you…or concentrate all my efforts on taking care of Derek?"

"I'm fine Cristina."

"I'm sure you are," Cristina told her, "but, it's been a long day," she said, "we're here…for anything he needs. Please," she said, "sit down…if he even stirs, I'll let you know," and Meredith consented, knowing her husband's care was in the best of hands.