CHAPTER 2
"Wow, I always knew that Katy was a sweetheart, but this is just ridiculous!" Parappa chuckled as he and Ma-San snuck into Katy's heart through her pulmonary artery and found that it was literally pumping straight-up glitter and rainbows into her bloodstream...but alas, there just HAD to be yet another flu virus hanging out in here (one of the normal humanoid ones this time, thank God) ruining all of the fun and happiness by sitting on his ass literally all day and filling Katy's poor naive heart (and therefore her bloodstream) with negativity and self-loathing.
How, you may ask? Why, of course- by constantly playing pointlessly, needlessly sad, mopey and depressing music on a guitar that he had just recently finished making using her heartstrings!
"Crawling in my skin...these wounds, they will not heal...I've forgotten what...is fake and what is real..." the virus sang and whined like the untalented douche he was as he boredly, uninterestedly plucked his acoustic guitar in a way that was about as manly as the song itself.
"Damnit, Lammy, we need someone to make Katy happy again!" Parappa urgently informed Lammy through his nanosuit's luckily included instant-voice-chat communication feature (which, of course, was connected directly to the iPad that she had stored in her pocket).
"Hey, that reminds me...HERE, Parappa!" Katy giggled amusedly, somehow summoning an electric guitar from thin air and tossing it straight out the window and all the way around the entire planet of Earth (with only one hand AND while still laying in bed, no less) where it then somehow self-guided itself right back through that very same window in midair and magically shrunk itself into Katy's mouth, prompting her to make yet another ridiculous GULP sound effect as the guitar somehow inexplicably went straight into Katy's heart and conveniently landed right in Parappa's hands, triggering a truly unexplainable hormonal phenomenon within his brain.
"Yeah, THAT'S right; my power to believe is in my MINNND! LEAVE IT TO...PARAPPPAAA!" Parappa laughed and yelled maniacally at the tops of his lungs, leaping into the air like a frog o n cocaine and causing everything around him to suddenly turn into a flurry of hyperactive LSD-induced rainbows, causing the sad piece-of-shit virus to literally melt like the Wicked Witch of the West!
"OH, WHAT A WORLD, WHAT A WORLD...WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT THAT INDUSTRIALISM WOULD BE DEFEATED BY EVEN MORE INDUSTRIALISM...AAAGGH..." the virus began moaning in a ludicrously bored and apathetic (mono)tone of voice as his entire body began grotesquely melting into nothingless, leaving nothing behind but a mere puddle of the worthless protoplasm that he was nothing BUT while Parappa and Ma-San worked their way back up the throat into Katy's mouth, briefly taking an extra peek just to make sure that the breaker switch on her voice box was still flipped to the ON setting; surely enough, it was.
"Come on, SAY IT!" Lammy playfully teased Katy, booping her nose adorably with her fingers.
"I- I LOVE- I LOVE YOU!" Katy humiliatedly stammered and blushed as Ma-San began deliberately flipping her voice box on and off just for the pure shits and giggles of it while Parappa merely stood atop Katy's tongue, shaking his head and rolling his eyes embarrassedly.
"Oh, Katy, you're so freaking adorable, you know that?" Lammy giggled merrily as she kneeled down onto the bed right in front of poor Katy and began lovingly stroking her fingers through both her own gorgeous hair and also Katy's as well, causing the collective combined mass of resultingly airborne hair particles to get sniffed right up Katy's loudly inhaling and snorting nose.
"AH...AHH...AHHH..." Katy began readying herself to sneeze while Parappa and Ma-San frantically leaped straight up off of Katy's tongue and desperately grabbed right on for dear life to the cat lady's dangling, swinging uvula to prevent themselves from getting blown right away!
"AHHHH-CHOOOO!" Katy sneezed violently with all of her might, blasting out a massive, gooey, slimy and ever-so-sticky load of sickly green-and-yellow snot all over Lammy's clothes.
"Bitch, you're DAMNED lucky I got the anti-flu vaccine when I was six, because otherwise I'd be TOTALLY whoopin' your ass right now!" Lammy chuckled more-than-slightly irritatedly at Katy, stripping her mucus-stained clothes right off and rendering herself completely buck-naked except for her pink polka-dotted bikini, socks and panties...which, of course, caused Katy to shoot out yet ANOTHER massive nasal discharge, with this one being a good old nosebleed all over her beautifully sexy redheaded guitarist college-girl lamb body.
"Say...SPEAKING of MINDS..." Lammy teasingly foreshadowed to Katy, laying down unsettlingly close to her on the bed with a profoundly smug smirk on her face while Parappa and Ma-San reluctantly decided to take a detour through Katy's eustachian tube, then finally through her inner ear and directly into her brain, in which her head cold was slowly but surely getting worse by the minute, from there.
"WHEEEEEE!" Parappa and Ma-San cheered ecstatically in unison as the two of them went right through Katy's semicircular canals and cochlea (making her extremely dizzy and worsening her headache even further, naturally), then finally zipped right along the auditory nerve until they finally reached Katy's brain center, where a rather distinctly loud and obnoxious buzzing noise could be readily heard coming from unsettlingly deep within the brain itself.
"DON'T. MOVE." Lammy sternly, very worriedly warned Katy with regards to how incredibly delicate and sensitive this particular part of her body was, prompting the poor lass to curl up into sideways fetal position, clutch her head and tremble helplessly in the bed. "Oh, and also, keep your head up!" Lammy reminded her teasingly, forcefully propping Katy's head upright against her pillow while the flu viruses stowed away in her brain pretty much just went about their usual business.
"Damnit, fucking bees, would you PLEASE calm the fuck down? Seriously, I'm just trying to play a game of freaking SOLITAIRE in here for crying out loud!" the flu virus leader yelled angrily at his pet flu-virus wasps, who had just recently snuck inside Katy's brain along with him and had now built approximately fifteen or so nests in her frontal and parietal lobes (the former of which predictably had a massive manual-control supercomputer built into the frontmost portion of its interior, which the lazy-ass leader was currently using to play FreeCell Solitaire and Minesweeper) and had now been assigned the important duty of stinging whatever type of antibody might come in and try to stop him to death...oh, and occasionally very painfully sting her brain, too. Needless to say, these wasps were undeniably the cause of her nasty headache.
(Did I mention yet that these were viruses big enough to easily be seen by the naked human eye?)
"Alright, now let's just see how things are going in there, shall we?" Lammy sighed as she reluctantly flipped open the top of Katy's head (using her ears as handles, of course).
"Hmm...you know what? As a rather (NOT) extensively trained medical practician myself, I'm personally going to have to deduce here that the only efficient way to deal with a head cold of this magnitude is with something seriously HOT! And thus, WA LA, I present to you...THE WORLD'S LARGEST CAN OF CHICKEN NOODLE SOUP BROTH!" Ma-San announced melodramatically to Parappa (making sure to whisper to him over the voice chat so that the leader wouldn't hear her) as she somehow magically pulled the exact thing that she was talking about (which was something like thirty times her size) literally right out of her ass, used her nanosuit's flying ability to hover directly above Katy's brain, put on a pair of fireproof oven mitts (also from her ass) and angrily breathed fire all over the (also somehow fireproof) can, preheating the contents to god-knows-how-many degrees Fahrenheit as she teasingly removed one of her space boots and used her freakishly sharp and deformed big toenail to open the top of the can while Katy squinted her eyes tightly shut, clutched her poor little head and continued trembling in terror as if there was literally no hope for her.
"EAT SOUP, SLIMY INSUFFERABLE SPACE ANOMALIES!" Ma-San laughed maniacally as she slowly, painfully and ever-so-sadistically poured a something-like-250-degrees-hot can of soup broth directly into the very top of Katy's poor, poor brain (which, oddly enough, was also nigh-heatproof AND completely waterproof somehow), creating a gargantuan electrical discharge from within her brain tissue and causing her to almost literally shriek her lungs out in unbelievable pain while the broth slowly but surely began seeping and dripping its way inside.
"Alright, this card goes here, and this one goes- OH, HOLY FUCKING SHIT ON A UNICYCLE!" the leader screamed in horror as the slow ominous oozing and dripping of boiling-hot nutritional liquid through Katy's grey matter quickly became an ungodly massive avalanche of pure bacterial death incarnate!
Now, as with almost every situation, there's good news and bad news for this one. The good news? The sheer temperature of the broth (obviously) instantly melted every single one of the remaining viruses into smithereens. The bad news? Katy was now very seriously crying in pain and had several third-degree burns on both the outside and inside of both hemispheres of her brain.
"Would you mind if I ATE that finely cooked little head specimen of yours?" Lammy teasingly asked Katy, looming over her with her hands extended outward and drooling like a zombie.
"FUCK NO, GO AWAY, GO AWAY, GO AWAY-HAY-HAY-HAYYY!" Katy screamed and cried in a fit of unbearable panic, curling up in a helpless little ball on the bed yet again and struggling desperately not to lose what very astonishingly little was left of her mind as Parappa and Ma-San stripped themselves naked (returning the nanosuits to whatever sort of weird and bizarre interdimensional hammerspace they had originally came from in the process, of course), went right for the secret entrance hatch on the bottom-left corner of her brain's left hemisphere (from the top view, of course) and immediately hopped right in without even saying another word!
"So tell me, Katy...was there anything you might have been secretly planning to...oh, I dunno, DO with me?" Lammy erotically teased Katy, kneeling down in front of her and pulling down her panties to fully expose her glorious ass cheeks while Katy began uncomfortably drooling and shaking in response.
Meanwhile, deep inside Katy's brain, Parappa and Ma-San had already reached her central control supercomputer and more importantly already knew (by heart) EXACTLY what to DO with it; surely enough, the two of them and Lammy alike were already maliciously grinning from ear to ear as the latter eagerly removed her bra and panties, stripping herself completely naked and revealing her orgasmically sexy anthropomorphic lamb-girl body in its scrumptious, glistening entirety in an amazingly successful attempt to seduce her ever-so-adorable and beloved girlfriend into fucking her silly (or letting HER fuck HER silly, whichever you prefer).
"Oh my, what's this? Lammy's sexual advance on Katy has caused her primal love instincts to go completely freaking INSANE!" Ma-San gasped in shock as basically just about every single key and button on Katy's brain-computer-dashboard became something related to HAVE SEX.
"HOO boy, this is gonna be SO much fun..." Parappa drooled at the mouth, pulled down his pants and began masturbating furiously just from the mere thought of finally getting to see Lammy and Katy fuck each other as hard as they were always truly meant to from the very beginning while Ma-San (who was now in charge of mind-controlling Katy into Lammy's BDSM slave while Parappa was busy loudly and disgustingly jerking himself off to it right next to her) audibly swallowed every last remaining drop of her pride and reluctantly hit Katy's UNDRESS key!