Thanks to those of you who reviewed and added me to your favourite stories/author...etc. This chapter was wierd to edit for me, I had written it a while ago but there was always something missing and it took a while to get right. So if its not good My Apologies!

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of its characters *sighs*

The Song used in this chapter is Everybody's Changing by Keane

Enjoy!

Chapter 2

Bella's POV

By the time I arrived home it had gone past 3 am, I was beyond tired that I barely registered opening the door to the house and settling upstairs in bed. My mind was clouded with the numerous thoughts that it beheld but at that moment it seemed insignificant as I drifted off to the darkness where I could be free of reality for at least a short while.

You say you wander your own land
But when I think about it
I don't see how you can

Awakened by the sound of the alarm blazing throughout my room was not the best way to be woken up after getting what?......4 hours of sleep, for it was now 7:30. I wanted to stay in the comfort of my bed and lock myself from outside world as I had done so throughout the summer, but today the inevitable was to occur; first day at Forks High. I groaned at the mere thought before lazily throwing away my duvet and heading to the bathroom.

My mind was suddenly taken over by darkness that made me hold on to the sink for support before gaining back my sight. Head rush.

I slowly lifted my head and looked at the stranger in front of me. She looked a mess. A mess was an understatement, her eyes red from tiredness and cries had resulted in the dark shadows under her eyes. Her hair tangled and untameable; like a haystack as she too stared back at me bewildered at herself. I looked more like a zombie than a person. Ashamed by the reflection in front of me; I turned on the shower and succumbed into the misty steam of the hot sprinklers.

The water felt as though it calmed me for a short period, as though it was washing away my pain and guilt. The crystal clear flow rushed swiftly from the shiny silver faucet, the water enrobed me, rushing past my face reminding me of my hysterical nature yesterday, which in turn reminded me of what I had attempted to do.

Sometimes it's easy to feel like you're the only one in the world who's struggling, who's frustrated, or unsatisfied, or barely getting by. But that feeling's a lie.

Was my life really that bad? So much that taking it away seemed a good idea in exchange for the freedom, from the heartache in life. There are so many people in this world that suffer, is my case any different? No. Do they give up? No. Thousands die in the world everyday from hunger and merciless diseases, many wishing for a chance to live and here was I simply wanting to give it up.

You're aching, you're breaking
And I can see the pain in your eyes
Since everybody's changing
And I don't know why.

I remembered the stranger, the young man who seemed so concerned and mysterious last night, his face was not clear in my memories, I don't know why perhaps because I was too tired. Yet the one thing I remember clearly was that despite the stranger's presence at that moment, when he spoke, I felt the safest and most cared for than I had been these last few months.

I recalled him following me in his car before the accident that had been my fault to begin with but why was he following me? I remember seeing his eyes as they bore into mine through the mirror, his eyes were significant somehow that I couldn't put a name to it; I was in some way drawn to it. I was reading too much into it but I hoped to never run into him again. I was a coward for simply walking away from what I did. I just left him there to deal with the consequences and the van, the man that was in it seemed to have been injured, all because of me. I couldn't even die without hurting others in the process.

I scrubbed my body harshly with the exfoliating loofah as though it could wash away my sins and pain but it only angered me further because the pain caused by the harshness was nothing compared to the pain I felt inside. I hated myself, I truly did. I was getting nowhere by standing here pitying myself, if I wanted control of my life I now had it, so next time I would take full responsibility for my actions instead of running away; coward.

It was already quarter to 8 and if I didn't get a move on, I would be late on the first day; so I quickly finished and began drying my hair as I returned to my room. Deciding to play it safe with my outfit as I had no idea at what type of clothes to wear, I settled for my dark blue sweater and dark jeans with the black boots which I had received last Christmas.

Tripping twice on the stairs on my way down before deciding on skipping breakfast; I left the house at half 8 to head to the new school. Joy! It doesn't surprise me anymore that I don't get hungry, though I keep the house fully stocked, most of it goes to the bin or if I force myself to eat it, it comes back up a few hours later, so I just give up like most things in my life.

Finding the school and a place to park was easier than I thought it would be; I knew my way around Forks due to the summer's spent here with Charlie but never for more than a few weeks because he would either be busy with some project or called away for work.

Pulling into a parking space and gathering my belongings from the passenger seat, I was glad that when I looked around I saw that nearly all cars were more or less same as mine; old and rusty with the exception of the shiny Volvo which stood out, for more reasons than one.

It was the car from last night, I was so sure that I was willing to bet my life on it but then again my life felt worthless right now so maybe that wasn't the right sentiment. I hoped to not run into the stranger again, for shame would take over me for the way I treated him, I could recall it now. I was harsh but then again he was too observant for his own good, he didn't need my problems being added to his life.

So little time
Try to understand that I'm
Trying to make a move just to stay in the game
I try to stay awake and remember my name
But everybody's changing
And I don't feel the same.

I tried to keep my head down and try to focus on not tripping over anything just yet, at least have a day before everyone became aware of my clumsiness that should be labelled mmore as a disability. Everyone seemed to be staring in my direction, all gathered in their own clique groups but then again what did you expect to move into a small town where everyone knows of each other's business. I tried my best to walk as fast I could and look for directions of reception, silently thanking the person who came up with the idea of having directions posted all around school, I made my way to reception to be welcomed by a woman in her early 40s.

"Hi...erm, my name is Isabella Swan, I'm supposed to be starting school today", I managed to choke out for I was already nervous at the thought of walking to each class and being labelled publically as the new student.

"Of course, we were actually expecting you to start last term but given your circumstances, it's completely understandable, so no need to worry sweetheart" she smiled at me before excusing herself to collect my school schedule and note to inform the teachers of my new arrival. She sounded the same as few people who I had ran into over last few months; always careful with their words; not to upset me or trying to make assumptions at how I am or should be feeling. They didn't know; no one did. In a way the guy's reaction last night was probably what I truly deserved, I needed the harsh truth in order to face it instead of slowly torturing myself slowly.

She returned within few minutes with all the necessarily guides and papers before guiding me into the direction of my first class.

"Good luck on your first day, I'm sure you're going love Forks High" she replied reassuringly and I faked a smile in return before heading towards...English Literature. Well at least it wouldn't be bad start for English was one of the subjects I actually enjoyed.

I stopped outside the classroom long enough to take a deep breath "Here we go again", I thought before briefly knocking on the door and entering. It really didn't help that everyone was already seated and quiet, making my presence even more significant than it already was.

I tried to focus on the teacher and not at the stares of my classmates and their hushed murmurs alongside me as I approached the teacher. I handed him the note, to which he carefully examined for a few moments and then pointing to the only empty seat in the room at the back. I quietly advanced towards my seat, thanking my luck at being seated at the back at least.

I could hear the giggles of the ever so excited girls that I could only assume to be cheerleaders being heard in the background; talk about stereotypical. I ignored them and took my seat.


You're gone from here
Soon you will disappear
Fading into beautiful light
'cause everybody's changing
And I don't feel right.


The hour went by quicker than I thought it would; the teacher gave me a reading list, all which I had already read before.

"At least I wasn't going to be behind on any of the work", I thought. I glanced at the girl who was seated beside me; she had the most peculiar features I had ever seen. Don't get me wrong, she was insanely beautiful with her short, dark pixie style hair and perculiar golden eyes but her skin was lightest shade that I had ever seen and I was the albino but what made it even more noticeable were the dark shadows under her eyes as it contrasted so profoundly with her flawless porcelain face; maybe she didn't get enough sleep like me, I mused.

I realised that I had been staring for she now turned her head in my direction and she too stared and gave me a reassuring smile before the bell rang and she jumped out of her seat gracefully and exited from the door. I wasn't sure why but the smile truly felt comforting despite the fact that she didn't know me, she didn't judge me like the others and for that I was grateful; maybe her and I would become friends I thought as I too exited and headed to Spanish.

The same charade was played out and I was labelled to the class as the new student once more, as if they didn't already know. The girl sat behind me tapped me on my shoulder as I sat down in my seat.

"Hi Bella, I'm Angela", whispered a girl with an olive complexion and dark brown hair with a shy smile.

"Hi" I replied in a mirroring shyness.

"How do you like Forks High so far?" she asked in an enthusiastic tone.

"It's...different", I managed to recollect. It was different to what I imagined, the girl in English for example that was inhumanly beautiful compared to others but the school also fitted in with the usual high school stereotypes perfectly well so far as well.

"I know it must be hard being the new student in a new town because I've been one but it gets better believe me" she whispered honestly in a comforting and reassuring tone and I was thankful for her sincerity.

"Thanks Angela" I replied genuinely.

"Anytime, so if you need any help or want to sit with us at lunch, you're more than welcome" she added before the teacher asked me to turn around and pay attention.

The lessons went by fast and before I knew it, it was lunch and even though Angela had reassured after the lesson that I should join her for lunch; I could only face so much social interaction in one day.

I had been so closed off from the world that already it was too much for me to handle, so I decided to take baby steps in order to not push myself; so much that I stop coming to school altogether. Therefore I settled in just going to my truck, listening to my iPod and reading. Another reason was that if I went to lunch with Angela there was no getting out of eating and it would raise questions that I didn't want to answer because even I didn't know the answers to them.

The hour was over before it started, I had only read 13 pages of A Walk To Remember; a book that used to be one of Renee's favourite. It had gotten good reviews when it was released as a film but I vowed to read the book before I watched it but never gotten round to it until now. The bell rung and the students started making their way to their last lesson of the day which for me was Biology.

Biology was harder to find because it was in a different building, the map of the campus was useless, how was I supposed to find my way around if the entire picture showed 5 simple boxes and marked the entrance and their names, so much to my dismay I had to ask for directions.

Getting there just a few minutes after the bell, I advanced towards the teacher more confidently this time but the confidence was short lived because as the teacher pointed out the seat which I would be taking from now on I saw the stranger that I had come across the previous night.

For a moment I could swear that time stopped because all I could see was him, he was staring at me too; clearly shocked at my presence as I was of his. He was beautiful beyond words; so much that I wondered how I couldn't remember this Greek God from last night. He had dark bronze hair that was somewhat messy but perfect at the same time, he muscular but yet boyish looking. However the first thing I noticed was the resemblance of the light skin and the light golden eyes, it almost an identical match of the girl in English. He looked a little angry now, agitated even. He must remember me. Shit.

Too soon, I realised that I was standing at the front of the class staring like a maniac at the stranger, the teacher must have been calling me throughout this time but I hadn't noticed, I was mesmerized by the striking angel in front of me.

"Isabella", he repeated, "are you alright? Do you want me to send someone with you to the nurse?"

"Its Bella", I said out of frustration, I didn't want to take it out on him but I really hated it when people called me that, I shifted my gaze onto something unimportant and added "sorry, I'm fine…I just had a bad night last night".

"If you're sure, well your seat is next to Edward so…." He pointed to the seat again; I didn't dare look into Edwards's eyes again and stared at the floor before taking my seat. I could feel his eyes on me even as I sat down. I hoped that he didn't blame for what happened yesterday even though it was my fault and the cheek for me to snap at him when he was trying to help me; it made feel more awful than I already did. I swear my heart was beating too fast, hoping to not hyperventilate; I took several deep breaths discreetly and calmed my emotions.


So little time
Try to understand that I'm
Trying to make a move just to stay in the game
I try to stay awake and remember my name
But everybody's changing
And I don't feel the same.

"Today class, you're all going to be participating in the dissection of a frog. In order to do that, you and your lab partner sat next to you will each take turn in dissecting the frog and identifying the key parts labelled in the diagram on the board", the teacher said as he pointed towards the board in front of the class. "I know that some of you will find this uncomfortable to begin with but this is vital to our study of physiology as there many feature such as the way the muscles are attached to the bones, which is similar to our bodies, therefore no complaining and get to work" he said in a finalized tone.

There was snickering heard from the back of the class by the ever so excited boys and the groaning of the girls in disgust. I on the other hand was already feeling dizzy at the mere thought of dissection; the blood and flesh.

I looked towards Edward sat next to and he too had the same expression as me, neither of us spoke but I we both knew what the other was thinking. I gazed into his eyes, suddenly realising them to be darker if possible. I was sure that when I looked into them before I saw the lightest shade of gold and now they seemed much closer to black, a dangerous black, so much that I couldn't stop a small shiver running down my spine. I looked away before gaining composure and turning towards him once more to see him still staring at me.

"Erm….do you want me to the equipment or do you…?" I realised how low my voice sounded. He must think I'm such a hypocrite, I nearly caused his death last night and here I am today acting as thought nothing had happened.

"I'll get them, you're new so it would take you longer to find the required equipment", he said through his teeth and gave me a forced smile before leaving abruptly; I swear I heard him mutter something under his breath before continuously clenching his long fingers into a fists as he walked away. Surprised at how he didn't bring up our encounter the previous night, I decided to drop it and not raise the subject, new school; new start but if he didn't want to raise it up, he was definitely upset about me being here- that much was obvious.

He returned few minutes later with all equipment in hand and set it up on the table. I muttered a quick "thanks" before asking whether he wanted to start first.

"Ladies first, right partner?" he gave me a crooked smile that dazzled me and pointed the scalpel in my direction. With my trembling hand, I hastily picked up the cold metal scalpel and pointed it towards the lifeless animal in front of me. I hated this, it didn't seem fair that we had to selfishly kill this creature simply to better our understanding; it wasn't even allowed to die and be left alone in peace. We could easily learn through some diagram or a film even.

"I'm reading too much in to it again, I need to stop" I thought, "Focus", I demanded myself.

Then with as much force as I could gather; which wasn't a lot, I slowly pierced the outer skin but as soon as my eyes hit the crimson coloured fluid, the red flowing syrup of life; my vision blurred, I felt warmer than usual and I felt my knees give out from under me and I felt cold, stone-like arms holding me as my world was surrounded by darkness.

So little time
Try to understand that I'm
Trying to make a move just to stay in the game
I try to stay awake and remember my name
But everybody's changing
And I don't feel the same.

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Thank You! Nikki xox