All characters of Kim Possible are property of Disney.

Shego and Company - Over the Edge

I'm not much for mornings, I'm more used to late nights of partying and indulging in every vice I can think of. Oh, who the hell am I kidding, after a few years in prison I'm more used to keeping one eye open incase I had any unwanted after hours visitor. Still, one good thing about waking up in the morning; I can probably snuggle Shego before she gets the strength to push me away. I sneak over to her room and she looks dead asleep. I jump into her bed and curl up against her back. Strange, she feels pretty sweaty, like she just worked out or something. I push my luck and suck on her neck a little. Salty but tasty, I should hickey her after her exercise time more often. Should've seen this coming; she clumsily elbows my tit to get me off. "Lynn, go back to bed..." she groans.

Glad she's still out of it, that would've really hurt if she actually put any effort into that elbow. "It's nine in the morning, Go girl, why so tired?"

She inches further toward the edge of the bed. "Tired, bother me later."

Another attempt to snuggle her backside leads me to spot a paper bag wedged between her bed and the wall. "What is that?"

She moans while trying to adjust to her new spot on the bed. "What's what?"

"That bag next to your bed."

She yawns. "Oh... just fifty grand."

"Fifty?! When the hell did... did you go out last night?"

"No shit, Sherlock, now let me get so fucking sleep already."

No need to make her grumpy, she's dangerous enough as it is when she's in a decent mood. After I slide out of her bed, I make my way to the kitchen where I see Camille's already morphed into a new look. "Leaving so early? How about you stick around and I'll whip up some coffee." I might not like her but we have to live together, might as well make peace where I can.

Of course, I should've known better; good deeds always backfire on you. "Sh'yeah, right. I'm going to Starbucks."

"Dammit, Camille, you're just wasting money. We have Starbucks beans right in the damn counter, I'll brew some."

"Drink you're swill? As if." Fucking bitch just trots out the door. I throw a knife in a huff, a little frustrated it only nailed the door and not that skank's back.

Oh well, screw her. I turn on the T.V. and start brewing. Morning news, wonder if there's anything good on, like something big to steal. Nothing so far, nothing worth swiping anyway, but I nearly miss something good by the time the java starts peculating. I turn up the volume. "-ils are sketchy but what is known is that the thief is still on the loose and extremely dangerous. As this tape shows, the culprit approached the store's bullet proof window at full speed on a motorcycle before dismounting, turning the vehicle into a deadly projectile, shattering the glass with ease. The owner told police that over ten thousand dollars was stolen from the safe, the lock apparently melted through with an acetylene torch."

Damn, she really went all out, didn't she? I pour myself a cup of joe and start greasing up a frying pan with some spray-on butter; I'm in the mood for some bacon and eggs. I take a quick sip before cracking two eggs open. The report keeps playing. "Though there are no clues to the suspect's identity, footage caught on a cellular phone leads investigators to believe that the robbery was not an isolated incident. Here, we can see someone, who police specialists have confirmed matches the perpetrator in the earlier video, jumping from rooftop to rooftop in Los Angeles's Hollywood district. The video was recorded about an hour after the first robbery and four other store fronts in the area have reported separate break-ins that night."

Shit, five places in one night, no wonder Shego's so tired. I scramble the eggs, make my bacon nice and crispy and start eating right on the counter. Hmm, bacon's good, my eggs need work though, maybe some extra spice. Stuck up Camille, this coffee is just as good as what you get on the corner without dealing with snotty baristas. I wash down the last bite of eggs with the rest of my coffee, I keep the pot hot for Shego. Guess I'm pretty much demoted to housewife now, that all-nighter Shego pulled got us some serious spending money. Hell, she did in what night what me and Camille couldn't do in two months. By the time I finish rinsing off my plate, Shego shambles up to the counter like dawn of the dead. "You made the news, congrats. "

Shego groans. "Fuck... don't tell me they know it's me already. I didn't even run into any cops."

"Naw, some security footage and a cell vid, they're clueless. Coffee?"

"Please and lots of it."

I pour her a cup and leave it black, the way she likes it. She takes a sip and I swear I can see life coming back into her eyes. "Want some breakfast?"

She moans quietly from the taste of the coffee and nods her head softly. "Yes, yes I do. We still got those frozen pancakes?"

Oh, was that a shot at my cooking skills? "Frozen pancakes? Are you serious? I can make you pancakes, tasty pancakes. Bitch, I can make you waffles."

She smiles, it's friendly, it's genuine, the kind of smile that tells me that me and her, it can work. At least, I like to think so. "Oh, waffles huh? You got the balls to make waffles?"

"They're fucking huge balls."

"Fine, make your waffles. They better be perfectly round, not a burn mark on them, each little pocket filled with syrupy goodness and they better be the delicious damn waffles I've ever had if you're so damn eager to make em'."

I grab a bowl and a box of mix. "They'll be so good, you'll be eating me out for a week you're gonna be so damn grateful."

She pours herself another cup of coffee and turns to the boob tube. "We'll see about that." So I make the batter, I make it my way, I don't follow those grade school instructions on the side of the box, I don't let a piece of fucking cardboard tell me how to make waffles. I pour my mix into the waffle iron, make sure it's nice and neat. Shit, I almost forgot how much fun cooking is. Between being locked up and getting tied up with my old show, I haven't made a waffle in eight years. Now I really hope it comes out good. "Hey, I'm back on the news... at least I think it's me."

I set the iron on a timer and lean over the counter. Yup, it's her again. "This just in, more details on last night's mystery thief, this time from the chief of police. It's been determined, after careful review of the videos taken last night, we're replaying them now for those who missed it, that the culprit is female and extremely agile. Though her face was obscured by a ski mask, the police have narrowed their list of suspects to a few known female criminals with exceptional acrobatic skills. Top of the list is former extreme stunt starlet, Adriana Lynn, better known as Adrena Lynn, who is currently wanted for her involvement in the prison riot massacre that took place-."

What the fuck?! "I'm their number one suspect!? Just because you did some fl... damn it, Shego! You just fucked me over! Why couldn't you do some of that sneeky shit you're so good at doing?"

I was so fucking pissed! She has super powers, she has those claws, she's even more buff than I am, why did they only tape her doing the flipping stuff. There's a look on her face, it's an expression of guilt, she didn't mean to put me under the spot light but I was too fucking livid to see that. "Lynn, common, you can do that shit in your sleep. It's not my fault those dicks think it's you on that."

"Yeah but they do. Thanks a lot."

"Hey, I was just stretching my legs. Six months in prison, the hospital stay, hell, even here I'm all cooped up. I didn't want to screw things for you, I just needed some damn outdoors time."

"Oh, you needed outdoors time? You? Bitch, I was in jail for years, YEARS! While you were stealing science crap and having your slap fights with Possible, I was crammed into a cell and had to shower with two hundred other women! I didn't have a mad scientist sugar daddy to break me out, I had to ride out that shit! See, this is just like the riot all over again; you don't have a plan and I end up getting fucked in the end!"

"Hey, you got fucked up because you decided to help me, that was your mistake. Lynn, you're overreacting. They don't know shit, they can't pin this on you, they're just making buzz."

I slap the pot off the counter, sending shards of glass and hot coffee sliding all over the floor. "This is L.A.! Buzz is the goddamn life blood of this city! They don't need to be right, they just need to say my name on CNN and I'm the bitch everyone's looking for! You know what, fuck it, I'm out of here!" I storm out for the door.

"Lynn, don't be such a bitch. Common, what about the cops, they'll be looking for you. What about the big score? What about us, all of us? What... what about the waffles?"

I open the door, turn around, and flip her the bird. "Waffle this, cunt!"

The door slams and make my way to the stairs, I don't even notice Shego running after me until she grabs my shoulder. "Damn it, Lynn, stop being stupid!"

I swing around, try to push her away, too much spin, too much force, I lose balance and break through the cheap wood railing. I fall, Shego grabs my wrist and I'm dangling three stories from the ground. Not much... but it's enough. "OH GOD! Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god! Don't let me fall, don't let me fall!"

I can hear her straining to keep a hold of me. "Lynn, get a grip! The hell is wrong with you?"

Can't tell her, not now, I can't even think straight. The floor seems even farther away, I start noticing all the hazards; falling across the banister, scrapping against the corner of that vending machine, chips of concrete tile digging into my skin on impact, infecting me, puncturing some internal organ, slicing through my nerves. I can't do anything but focus on every little thing that'll put me back in traction. "Please don't let me fall!"

Now I can't see anything, crying uncontrollably, so scared, I must be digging my nails into her forearm. It takes time but she pulls me up, pulls me away from the edge. I'm still losing it, not so much, but the last thing I am right now is coherent. Shego drags me back into the apartment and slaps me across the face. "What the hell is wrong with you!?"

I can't tell her, I hated her for making me a wanted woman and it's her fault I got the shit beat out of me by the skin heads. But she saved my life and I just wanted to focus on that now. I throw myself to her waist and cry the last of my hysterical tears into her shirt. "Thank you... thank you..."