It was a nice sunny day for a Reaping. Most days are sunny here in District 10, though. Like most people in my district, I lived on a farm. In district 10 there are beef farms and there are dairy farms. My house was on a dairy farm. I was happy with that, since then at least I didn't have to kill the cows. I just had to get up every day before the sun was even up and milk them all so they didn't start bawling at us. I'd already milked them today. I was just sitting on the fence, nibbling my cheek nervously in patterns of four.
I'd gotten done with my chores extra early, since I didn't want Ma to have to worry about them. She was probably all wound up about the Reaping anyway. She'd want me to get all washed and pressed and gussied up. I don't care at all about those things, so I do whatever makes her happy. We're all alone out here since Dad got sick. We're not sure what he had, but it doesn't matter. He's dead all the same.
"Cornflower!" I heard my mother calling me. I knew there was plenty of time to get ready, but Ma hardly ever got to fuss over me, so I jumped off the fence and ran inside our little farmhouse. I stopped when I reached the threshold and stepped on it with both feet.
Ma was waiting in the main room with a hairbrush. She sat down and patted her lap.
"Aw, Ma!" I protested. My hair was only a few inches long anyway. It was longer, but one day I just woke up and felt like it was smothering me. It felt strange and alien and I just had to cut it off. I thought about shaving it, but Ma already had enough to put up with.
Ma ignored me and resolutely ran the brush through my stubs.
"Have you washed?" She asked.
"Yeah, I washed," I said sullenly. I take a bath and three days later she wants me to take another one. I wouldn't mind if I didn't have to take all my clothes off. That just felt wrong.
Ma held up a dark blue dress with little white flowers on it. I took it without comment and changed into it out of my pants. It was scratchy and rough, but she'd made it herself, and it was as good as any other dress. My fingers brushed against each other as I slipped it over my head, so I tapped them all together four times.
Ma looked me over.
"Are you ready?" she asked. She looked happy to me, but I knew she was probably pretending. I'm just not good at telling the difference.
"I'm ready. Don't worry- I'll be back soon," I said. Ma hugged me tight and I hugged her back. Ma's hugs are the best because she hugs really hard and you know she's hugging. Some people hug softly or kind of half hug and I don't know what they want. That's just confusing.
I ran down our dirt driveway and stopped at the end to wave at Ma, who was watching from the door. Then I ran on until I reached town. The Reaping center had a few people milling about, but there was still plenty of room. I came early, since I don't like crowds.
A lady in a white gown asked for my hand. I shoved it in her direction and looked resolutely away, pretending I was somewhere else and distancing myself entirely from my hand. Her skin was damp and it pressed awfully on mine as she took a drop of blood. As soon as she was done I snatched my hand back and tucked it away.
I took my place at the end of a line of other seventeen-year-old girls. They kept brushing against me and I shied away, folding myself into my dress. I stared down at my shoes and nibbled more forcefully at my cheek.
Just a few more minutes. Few more minutes. Few more minutes. Minutes. Minutes. Minutes. More minutes. More minutes, I thought as I waited. I closed my eyes and stood completely still.
I heard more girls gathering around me, and finally a microphone broke through the scene. I looked up to see a man dressed in a powder blue suit covered in gold glitter. I recognized him as the District 10 escort, but I didn't remember his name. Names are like that. They go in one ear and out the other. I wouldn't even recognize his face if I saw him on the street. I only knew him because he was wearing Capitol clothes.
Our escort gave the normal speech. I didn't listen, but I had it all memorized anyway. Sometimes the words got into my head and I repeated them until they faded away. They wanted me to say them more. I could make them quiet down, but they were never silent.
I started paying attention when our escort walked over to a glass bowl filled with paper.
"Ladies first!" he said brightly. He plunged in his hand and fished out a slip of paper.
"Cornflower Fields!" he announced.
Cornflower Fields. Fields. Fields. Wait, that's me! That's me that's me that's me that's me, I thought. I started walking toward the stage without thinking. It didn't seem real. Nothing ever really did. It was like I was always waiting for life to actually start, and I didn't know if it ever would.
I walked up the stairs to the stage. One, two, three steps.
Three steps three steps ugh I hate three three steps three steps, I thought as I walked. I stepped with each foot on one step and jumped over the third, suppressing a shudder. Three is a terrible number. It's ugly and nasty and mean. It was all I could think about as I stood next to the jar.
Our escort called the male tribute, and Leather Sod joined me on the stage. He was a slip of a boy, and I didn't recognize him. I didn't recognize anyone except our escort. I don't leave the farm much. Our escort said something, and Leather took my hand. I jerked away slightly, but I remembered that wasn't polite, and I tried to squeeze back in a friendly way while I died inside.
"Let's have a round of applause for our District Ten tributes, Cornflower Fields and Leather Sod!"