Bob's Burgers: The Night of the Living Burgers
Jimmy Pesto was looking through his binoculars at his nemesis', Bob Belcher's restaurant across the street. He was angry. Bob had customers, and he had none. Bob had stolen his customers, and they were over there laughing, eating, drinking, talking, and having a merry ol' time.
He didn't get it. Why were they over there? What had Bob done to make his restaurant more popular than ever, and leave his bare? He didn't like it one bit. He decided to investigate. He put down the binoculars, and headed towards the door.
"Dad?" His son, Jimmy Jr, asked him. "Where are you going?"
"I'll be back, son." Jimmy told him. "I'm just going to Bob to see how he stole all of our customers."
"What makes you so sure he stole our customers?"
"Because our restaurant is supposed to be booming, not his!"
"Dad, don't you think you're overreacting?"
"No, son, I do not. Now, stay here. I won't be long." And with that, he left the restaurant and went over to Bob's.
"I like to see Bob!" Was the first thing out of Jimmy's mouth when he entered, and went to the counter.
"Hey, Jimmy!" Linda greeted. "What brings you here?"
"I need to see Bob."
"Well, you have to wait. He's making a burger."
"Hey, Jimmy." Tina said. Jimmy looked at her as she and her two siblings were standing in front of him. "Is Jimmy Jr. here with you?"
"No, Tina." Jimmy answered. "No, he's not." Tina was disappointed.
"Oh, okay."
"Hey, Jimmy!" Gene piped up. "Look at what I can do!" And with that he farted and burped at the same time. Jimmy was disgusted, and tried to fan the smell away. "See? I burped and farted at the same time. I call that a furp." Louise groaned.
"No one cares, Gene!" She told him, irritated. "Although that's a good name for it, furp." Gene took a bow.
"Why, thank you little lady." He said. "I've been practicing it all day."
"Okay, thank you, kids." A not amused Jimmy said to them. He then looked at Linda. "Is your husband coming or not?"
"Hold on." Linda said to him. She then called to Bob. "Hey, Bobby! Jimmy's here, and he wants to speak with you!" Bob then came from out of the kitchen.
"Oh, hello, Jimmy." He greeted, giving a customer his burger. "What can I do for you?"
"I'd like to know why your restaurant has a lot more customers today, and mine has none?"
"You have no customers whatsoever?" Linda questioned. "That's so sad."
"Yeah, it is sad." Bob agreed. "But, it's simple." He then became excited. "It's because people like my restaurant more then you!"
"Yeah!" Louise added. "So, you can just suck it, Jimmy!"
"Yeah, just suck it, Jimmy!" Jimmy glared at them, and clenched his fists. Bob and Louise did a high-five.
"Did you add an extra ingredient?" Jimmy asked.
"No." Bob answered. "Believe it or not, but people are just liking us today."
"Yeah!" Louise said again. "So, you can just suck it! Again!"
"Okay, Louise," Bob said to his daughter. "I think that's enough." But, Louise went on.
"Suck it so hard; suck it like you never sucked it before. Suck it like…"
"Okay, Louise; enough!"
"Well, okay Bob. I'm leaving you, but I have my eyes on you." He gestured that he had his eyes on Bob. "I have my eyes on you, your family, and this entire restaurant."
"Do your have your eyes on me?" Teddy wanted to know. Jimmy ignored him, and went to leave. "No, I'm serous. Do you have your eyes on me?" Jimmy left, and was still gesturing he had his eyes on them all as he crossed the street to his restaurant.
"That guy's creepy." Gene observed.
"And has some serious issues to work out." Louise added. "I thought that a car was going to run over him while he was doing that."
"Then Jimmy Jr will be fatherless." Tina chipped in. "Or he'll just have a father in the hospital, either way, it'll be bad for him."
"Okay, kids." Bob told his kids. "The excitement's all over. It's time to get to work."
"I like it when we have misadventures like this at work." Gene said as he and his sisters returned to the kitchen. "It makes work a lot more interesting."
Jimmy then entered his restaurant where he found his son, sitting and watching TV.
"What you doing, Junior?!" He commanded to know. Jimmy Jr. looked at his dad.
"I'm watching Gremlins." He answered.
"When you should be working?"
"No one's here, Dad!"
"Right. I have to figure out why." He went to the window, and looked across the street. He scratched his chin. "What's your game, Bob?" What are you hiding?" He pondered about this, but he couldn't concentrate. The TV was too loud. "Junior! The TV's too loud. I can't concentrate." But, he didn't turn it down "Junior?" He sighed when the TV was still loud. He went towards where his son was. "JUNIOR!" Junior looked at him. "IT'S TOO LOUD!" Jimmy Jr. grabbed the remote, and turned down the volume.
"Sorry, Dad." He apologized. "I didn't realize it was that loud." But, his dad wasn't looking at him. He was looking at the TV. Gremlins were chasing after two people. "Dad!" His dad immediately snapped out of it. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah, son, but you just gave me a idea." Jimmy Jr. shrugged, and turned back to TV watching while his dad slipped away.
Jimmy carried a bottle of a liquid as he went back to Bob's restaurant. Bob saw him re-enter.
"Jimmy?" Bob asked. "What are you doing back in here? Are you ready to admit defeat that my restaurant is better then yours?"
"What? No! I just need the bathroom is all."
"Why didn't you just use yours?"
"I just didn't is all, okay?"
"Okay, okay, sheech! Take it easy." He pointed behind him. "It's just over there." Jimmy faked a smile.
"Thanks, Bobby." He headed towards the bathroom.
He didn't have to use the bathroom. Instead, he just opened the door, and pretended to be terrified. He screamed, ran out, closing the door behind him. He did heavy breaths. Everybody looked at him.
"What is it, Jimmy?" Bob asked him.
"I just saw a dead body, Bob." Bob was confused.
"A dead body?"
"Yes, Bob. A dead body."
"Oh, how dreadful!" Linda gasped. The kids came out of the restaurant.
"A dead body?!" Gene wanted to know. "Coooolllllll!"
"I want to see" Louise said.
"Louise," Bob told her. "No, you don't. You kids go back to work. I got this."
"Are you sure, Bobby?" Linda asked him.
"Yes, Linda. I do." And with that, the kids and Linda went off as Bob went into the bathroom.
"I don't see any dead body in here, Jimmy." Bob said to him when he was in.
"Keep looking, Bob." Jimmy said eerily. "It's there." He closed the door, and locked it with a padlock.
"Well, I don't see it." Bob said, thinking Jimmy was still listening. "I'm coming out." He tried the door, but couldn't open it. "Uh, Jimmy?" He turned the doorknob. "Jimmy!?" He pounded on the door. "COME ON, JIMMY! THIS ISN'T FUNNY; OPEN UP! JIMMYYYYYY!" Linda and the kids rushed to the door, along with everybody else.
"Bobby!" Linda said. "Bobby, there's a padlock on here. I can't get you out; you're locked in."
"Dad!" Gene called. "How does it feel to be locked in? Does it feel better then being stuck on the toilet?"
"Ugh; Gene!" Bob said, embarrassed. "Why did you say that?"
"He was stuck on a toilet?" A boy asked. Gene turned to him.
"Yeah; he was stuck on there for hours!"
"Linda, Jimmy locked me in here." Bob said, wanting to change the subject. Linda was confused.
"Jimmy locked you in here? Why would he do that? He wanted to use this bathroom."
"It was a ruse, Lynn. There's no dead body in here. He did it because he was jealous that we were getting more customers then him."
"That's mean. I wonder why he did that." Bob had enough.
"BECAUSE WE'RE RIVALS, LYNN!"
"Hey, why are you yelling at me?"
"BECAUSE I'M STRESSED OUT; I JUST WANT TO GET OUT OF HERE!"
"Are we playing the screaming game?" Gene questioned. "I want to play." He then burped and farted. "YEAH, I JUST FURPED!"
"YEAH!" Louise added. "I'M SCREAMING ABOUT SOMETHING! THIS FEELS SO GOOD!" She nudged Tina. "Join in, Tina." But Tina just groaned, not knowing what to say. Louise was irritated by this. "You're such a buzz kill, Tina."
"KIDS; STOP IT!" Bob screamed. The kids all stopped. "This isn't helping."
"Sorry, Dad." Gene apologized.
"We'll get you out here soon, Bobby." Linda assured her husband. "You won't stay in here longer then the time you got stuck on the toilet." Kids laughed.
"LYNN!"
"Sorry; the 'incident'. That's what I meant to say. We'll still get you out."
Meanwhile, in the kitchen, Jimmy found a lone patty, and poured the liquid on it. He chuckled evilly.
"By the time everyone hears that a burger is attacking everybody," Jimmy said to himself. "No one will want to eat here. They're come to me instead." He laughed evilly. He saw some more patties, and couldn't resist. He poured the liquid in them too. He laughed and laughed.
"Do I hear evil laughter in the kitchen?" Gene wanted to know.
"It sounds like Jimmy Jr's dad." Tina pointed out. Linda went to the locked door, carrying a lock pick and a wrench. "Okay, Bobby, I got the lock pick and a torsion wrench. I'll get you out in a jiffy." She put the lock pick and wrench in the lock, and worked them. The kids cheered, urging her on.
"There you go, Mom!" Louise cheered. "Just work it!"
Jimmy had just got out off the kitchen when the door opened, freeing Bob. Everyone cheered.
"You okay, Bobby?" Teddy wanted to know.
"No, Teddy." Bob told him. "I just got locked in my own bathroom, and lied to; I'm not okay."
"Oh good, Bob." Jimmy said. "You're out. How does it feel to be free?" Bob was angry.
"You locked me in there, Jimmy! You also lied about the dead body." Jimmy pretended to be clueless.
"What? Me? Bob, I'll never. That would be highly unprofessional."
"Well, that's what you did, and I won't tolerate it. You're up to something, Jimmy, and I'll figure it out. And were you in my kitchen?"
"Oh, no."
"LIES!"
"Bobby!" Linda gasped.
"No; I honestly don't know what you're talking about." Jimmy stated. "Now, if you excuse me, I'm going to my own restaurant. Bye, Bob!" He then left. Bob huffed.
"Kids, let's get back to work." Bob told his children.
"But Dad," Louise started.
"Let's get back to work!"
"Okay, okay! Gosh, Dad, no need to be pushy." She and her family then went back to work. Linda put the tools away.
"Here's your burger, Sir." Bob said to a customer as he handed him a burger. "Sorry, it took so long."
"Well, it's about time!" He said. "I'm starving!"
"Well, enjoy and come again." The customer eyed Bob.
"We'll see, Bob."
"Of course, we will." Bob then left back for the kitchen. The customer picked up his burger.
"Alright, burger." He said to himself. "Time to ride on the Ryan Express, choo-choo!"
"Is he talking to himself?" Louise asked. She and her siblings were nearby.
"He's weird." Gene observed.
"Anytime now!" Jimmy said to himself. He, again, was spying with his binoculars, He was watching, as Ryan was about to take a bite of his burger. "Come on; come on!" He chuckled evilly. Jimmy Jr. came in, looking confused.
"You okay, Dad?" He asked him. Jimmy looked at him.
"Of course I'm okay. Why wouldn't I be okay? What a silly question!" Jimmy Jr. shrugged, and went on as his dad resumed looking through the binoculars.
Ryan was about to take the bite when he heard a growl. He stopped, and looked around. He shrugged, and tried again. Again, he heard a growl and looked around.
"Who's growling at me?" He commanded to know. There was silence. Ryan tried eating again. When he heard the growl again, he snapped his head around.
"OKAY!" He shouted. "WHO IS GROWLING AT ME? WHO!?" People looked at him, and screamed with panic.
"WHAT ARE YOU ALL SCREAMING ABOUT?!" Something then bit him. "OW; WHO BIT ME? WHO?!" He then looked and couldn't believe it. The burger that he was about to eat has grown enormously. The Belchers saw this, and their mouths were agape.
"Cool!" Louise observed. "It's like the peach in James and the Giant Peach!"
"Only this is a burger." Gene pointed in. "It's Gene and the Giant Burger!" Louise turned to her brother.
"Wrong, Gene; it's Louise and the Giant Burger!"
"Kids!" Bob barked. "This isn't important!" The burger attacked Ryan, Ryan screamed. He and the other customers ran out of the restaurant as more burgers came out of the kitchen, and chased them. The original burger stayed behind. The Belchers hid behind the counter.
"What happened?" Linda wanted to know. "Why did the burger grow enormous, and is attacking the restaurant, and more roaming the streets?"
"I don't know." Bob admitted. He then eyed Jimmy across the street. "But, I might have an idea." He stood up.
"Bobby, where are you going?" Linda questioned. Bob looked at his wife.
"I'm going across the street, Lynn. I think this has Jimmy all over this." He panicked as he tried to escape, as the burger looked his way, and growled at him. He knelt back down. "Never mind. Looks like I'm staying here for a while."
"Bobby," Linda said to her husband, a few minutes later. The burger was still growling at him. "We can't stay here. We have to go."
"I agree, Lynn." Bob agreed. "We have to distract him somehow."
"What do burgers like?" Tina wanted to know.
"Well, humans like burgers," Gene said. "And it attacked that man, and scared everyone out. So, maybe burgers like humans." He then got an idea. "We might need a human sacrifice."
"No, Gene." Bob said. "We don't need a human sacrifice. We…"
"Yeah!" Louise stated. "Human sacrifice; I nominate Gene!"
"No, Louise," Bob told her. "No one is nominating anyone. All we have to do is…"
"Who do you nominate, Tina?" Louise asked her. But Tina just hesitated, and did her monotone moan. Louise turned back to Gene. "Tina chose you too."
"No, Louise, Tina didn't. She…" Gene bowed at the whole family.
"I, Gene Belcher, will serve my country well."
"No, Gene. You don't have to do this."
"Now, don't you mope. If this sacrifice means my people will be free, I'd be happy to. If I don't come back alive, I want you to make furp a thing." Louise saluted him.
"I won't let you down!" She promised him.
"Gene," Bob began. But, Gene just turned to the burger, and ran to the burger.
"MAKE FURP A THING!" Bob shook his head, hand on forehead in shame.
"Oh, gosh!"
"YOU GO, GENE!" Louise cheered. "WHOO-HOO!"
"You want me, burger?" Gene taunted the food item. "Well, you have to catch me first!" He ran as the burger roared, and chased him.
"GENE!" Bob yelled at his son.
"NOW, IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO GO, DAD!" Louise tugged on her dad's sleeve.
"He's right, Dad." Louise told her father. "We need to go now, if we want to survive." Bob sighed, but knew her daughter was right. He waited until the burger and Gene were further away before he ushered his family to follow.
"Come on, guys. Out of the restaurant." They all ran towards the door. The burger noticed this, and ran after them. Gene ran as fast as he could, and lunged at the hamburger, preventing it from going further. The family gasped, and looked back.
"GO!" Gene yelled at them. "Don't worry about me; I can handle this!" The hamburger leapt at Gene. Gene fell on the floor, and ran to his family. "I can't handle this. What were you thinking?! I'm just a boy!" Louise shook her heading, tsking in disbelief.
"Coward!" She said, but ran and screamed with her family, including Gene.
"Okay, Jimmy!" Bob barked as soon as they barged into his restaurant. "Where are you; show yourself!" Tina saw him, terrified as he sat down behind the counter, trying to shoo the growling hamburger away with a frying pan.
"There he is, Dad!" Tina announced, pointing to him. "He's behind the counter!"
"And boy, does he look terrified!" Gene added.
"Alright, Jimmy Pesto! What is the meaning of this? What did you do to this monster hamburger?" Jimmy stuttered.
"I-I-I…" He stuttered.
"We have us a stutterer here!" Gene put in.
"Answer me, Pesto!" Bob commanded. Jimmy Jr. then appeared beside his father, confused.
"What is he talking about, Dad?" He wanted to know.
"Hi, Jimmy Jr." Tina greeted, changing the subject.
"Oh, hi, Tina." Jimmy Jr. greeted back, and then looked at his father again. "What does he mean, Dad? And why is the hamburger alive, and growling at you?"
"Tell him, Jimmy!" Bob ordered. "Tell your son what you did. He, as well as us deserves to know." Jimmy couldn't take it anymore.
"Alright!" He sobbed, hands in lap. "I put a special potion in the burger to make it come alive. It was suppose to scare customers away, and have them come to my restaurant instead. However, it went out of control, and I didn't expect this!" He cried and cried. "I'm sorry; I'm sorry!"
"Wow!" Gene observed. "Seeing a grown man cry is just pitiful!"
"Poor Jimmy." Linda stated. "I feel sorry for him even though he did something wrong."
"Yeah, me too." Tina agreed.
"Don't feel sorry for him." Bob said. "This man terrified my customers for his personal gain."
"Dad!" Tina shouted. "Stop fighting; we should just figure out how to stop this!"
"Tina's right." Linda said. "We should do something. Jimmy might have done something wrong, but it's not too late to make it right."
"One thing is I don't understand," Louise started. "is where did you get the potion?"
"Yeah," Bob said. "That is weird. You don't get one at your local store every day. Jimmy, care to explain?"
"I found a potion shop. It appeared out of nowhere, and I brought it for five bucks from a scientist. It just vanished the moment I stepped out of there."
"Creepy!" Gene observed. "Just as soon as he said that, it gave me goose bumps!"
"Me too!" Louise added. Jimmy Jr. snapped his fingers as an idea hit him.
"So, this is the idea you got when I watched Gremlins." Jimmy Jr. stated.
"Yes, son." Jimmy admitted. "Yes, it is."
"You have a very smart son." Tina told Jimmy." Jimmy smiled.
"Yes, I do." Jimmy's son then noticed the hamburger looking and growling at him. He was terrified.
"Uh, Dad." He said. "Why is it growling at me?"
"Uh-oh." Louise said to herself. "This does not look good." The hamburger then lunged at him. Jimmy Jr. tried to shield himself, screaming.
"SON!" Jimmy yelled in terror.
"JIMMY JR, NO!" Tina yelled too, terrified as well.
"Yay!" Gene cheered. "This just got interesting!" The food item sank its teeth into Jimmy Jr.'s sleeve, and began dragging him away.
"DAD!!" Jimmy Jr. shouted as he was being forced out of the restaurant. "HELP MEEEEEEEE!"
"SON!" Jimmy hollered in fright. He turned to the Belchers.
"Bob, I know you're still mad, and might not forgive me, but please! He's my son. Help me get him back! If this were one of your kids, I would help too. This is much too important than our fight."
"I agree." Bob agreed. "This is horrible, and thank you. I will help you! Linda and I will do whatever it takes to help get your son back." Jimmy smiled.
"Thanks, Bob. It's nice to be on the same team for once."
"We'll help too, Dad." Louise volunteered. "And before you say it, we don't want to hear it. We'll go anyway, so saying we can't will be utterly pointless."
"Yeah!" Gene cheered. "Utterly pointless; there's no changing our minds! We won't let you down, Dad!" Bob sighed. He looked at Linda, who nodded. He looked at Louise. "Alright, you can come, but be careful. It's dangerous." Louise and Gene cheered again. Tina cheered too, just not as loudly.
"Jimmy Jr.!" Tina called as they saw him and the hamburger in the streets. The hamburger still was dragging Jimmy Jr. by the sleeve. More people were running and screaming as hamburgers attacked and chased them.
"TINA; DAD!" Jimmy Jr. yelled. "Get out of here; save yourselves!"
"No!" Tina shouted back. "I won't let that hamburger harm you any longer!" The girl looked around for something to throw at the hamburger.
"Here." Louise said, handing her a rock. "I found this under the bush by the side of the road. I don't know if this'll help, but, give it the H word!" Tina smiled at her sister, looked at the burger, and hurled it at it as hard as she could. It made contact, and the burger dropped its hold on Jimmy Jr, and growled at her. She cheered to herself.
But, the burger was facing Tina now.
"Tina, run!!" Bob told his daughter.
"Run, baby, run!" Linda urged. The burger charged towards Tina. Tina's eyes widened in horror.
"Uh, crap!" She cursed.
"RUN, TINA, RUN!" Bob yelled. Tina didn't think twice. She ran and ran as fast as she could. Unfortunately, she ran so fast that she tripped, and fell on the ground.
"Dang it!" She cursed. She looked behind her, and gasped. The burger leapt towards her. Tina screamed as she tried to shield herself.
"TINA!" Both Bob and Linda screamed in horror as they watched.
"GENE TO THE RESCUE!" Gene yelled as he tackled the burger to the ground. The burger tried to get Gene off, but Gene kept the burger pinned. Everyone cheered. Tina stood up, and ran to her parents. "No one harms my sister, and gets away with it, hear me? Nobody!"
"Tina, are you okay?" Asked a worried Jimmy Jr.
"Yeah, Jimmy Jr." Tina admitted. "I'm fine. You?" He nodded.
"Yeah, I'm fine."
"And to make sure, you stay down…" Gene continued, and took a bite out of the hamburger. He smacked his lips. "MMM, tasty!" He ate some more, despite its cries in pain.
"Of course!" Bob observed. "How could we have been so blind? The only way to stop these burgers is if we treat them like burgers, and just eat them." Linda turned towards the crowed.
"People!" She announced. "Do what my baby is doing, and eat the burgers. No money necessary." People cheered, and started eating.
They ate and ate all into the night.
"Man, I'm stuffed!" Bob said. He and his family, plus Teddy, Jimmy, and Jimmy Jr. were all in living room in the Belcher residence. The Belchers were all on the couch. "I feel like we ate everything on Thanksgiving!"
"Yeah!" Teddy agreed. "Except we ate burgers, not turkeys!" Gene burped, and then farted. Louise laughed.
"Nice furp, bro!" She said.
"Thanks!" Gene thanked her. "I think that was the best furp yet."
"What's a furp?" Jimmy Jr. asked. So, Louise explained.
"Bob," Jimmy said to him. "Again, I'm very, very sorry for all of this. It went out of hand. I hope you forgive me."
"Well," Bob started. "We're rivals, and what you did was wrong, but it's best to leave the past behind us. I suppose I can forgive you, if you never, ever do this again."
"You have my word." Jimmy promised. He and Bob shook hands.
"So, are we going home now, Dad?" Jimmy Jr. asked his father. Jimmy nodded.
"That's a good idea, son. I think it's time. We have work tomorrow." He tried to stand up, but couldn't. "Ooh, can't son. I'm too full. We're going to have to stay the night." Teddy couldn't stand up either.
"I can't stand up ether, Bobby." He admitted.
"Why did you come here in the first place?" Bob wanted to know. "You don't live here." Teddy pointed to Jimmy.
"He and his son don't live here, but they're here."
"That's because I gave them permission. Plus, Jimmy came here to apologize, and Jimmy Jr. is his son." Teddy shrugged.
"I come here a lot; I feel like I'm family."
"And you can stay here as long as you need to, Teddy." Linda said to him. Teddy smiled.
"Thanks, Linda."
"Hey, Jimmy Jr." Tina started. "Want to go to my room? I can show you my stuff and more maybe."
"Sure." Jimmy Jr. replied. He looked at his father, who nodded. They then went upstairs. Jimmy then looked at Bob.
"Hey, Bob," He began. "Now this may sound crazy, but how about we sleep over? That way, our tummies will no longer be so full, and we can be ready for action tomorrow."
"Sure, Jimmy." Bob said. "I suppose you all can sleep here tonight. We don't mind."
"Yay!" Linda cheered. "Sleepover!"
"I thought sleepovers are just for kids." Gene said.
"Waking up to see Teddy and Jimmy here might be a little weird." Louise said. "I'm not used to it." She then shrugged. "Oh well; it'll just be for tomorrow."
And so they stayed the night, and the next morning, the Pestos, and Teddy went home. Both the Belchers and Pestos continued with their restaurants, getting equal amounts of customers.