Fighting For What You Care About ch. 2
Fuck, my body hurts. Stupid St. Douchebag and his stupid claws. I swear if he comes near Rachel or Q, I'm gonna… oh wait, I did already. Fuck, I'm so screwed! Rachel and Q saw my transform. Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! What the hell am I doing to do? They know my secret and there's no way in hell that they're gonna want to be around me now and why would they? I'm a fuckin monster. Fuck, this fuckin sucks like hell. I open my eyes only to have to close them again because of the brightness of the room as I tried to open them slowly before blinking away the blurriness to look around to see that I'm not in my room or in the forest anymore but there's a familiarity about it then it came to me that I'm in co-captain's room. What the hell am I doing here? How did I get here? I tried to push myself but my body protested against it as I lower myself back when I hear voices coming from downstairs thanks to my enhanced hearing as the voices argued back and forth, knowing that the voices belonged to Berry and Q.
"What are we going to do, Quinn?" Rachel asked frantically. "Did you know that Santana was a werewolf?"
"No, I didn't know that she was a werewolf. I can't believe that she didn't tell me about this. I thought that we were friends, I mean we tell each other everything yet she hid this from me" Quinn said frowning.
"Baby, I'm sure that she had her reasons for keeping this from you. I'm sure that she was just scared of what other people might say or do to her if they knew" Rachel said taking in a deep breath.
"But I'm not other people, I'm her best friend and I would've had her back when it came down to it" Quinn said shaking with anger. "I'm gonna give her a piece of my mind"
"Quinn, wait"
I hear footsteps coming up the stairs quickly and in a hurry before I knew it, the door is swung open, hitting the wall hard when my co-captain and me locked eyes to see the anger behind those hazel eyes signaling that I was about to get a verbal smack down. I was going to let her get everything that she needs to say to me because I know that I should've talked to Quinn about what happened to me but I couldn't cause I thought I was doing what I thought was best for everything but I was being selfish when I should've talk to my best friend. I just didn't want to bring her into my mess but I managed to do the exact opposite of that and she's pissed off at me with every right to be as she stomps over towards me and I'm willing to take everything that she was about to give me that is until Berry steps in-between me and my co-captain with her arms folded over her chest.
"Rachel, move. This is between me and her" Quinn said glaring at her.
"No Quinn, I can't do that. She's in no shape to take any kind of verbal lashing at the moment" Rachel said frowning.
"I don't care because she lied to me for two months about what's been going on with her and she deserves to get her ass kicked"
"I understand that you're upset Quinn with Santana about keeping something of this caliber a secret from you but at least wait until she's fully healed to yell at her. You owe her that much seeing as she did save our lives from St. James was bent trying to kill not long ago"
"Fine, fine but once you're healed, your ass is mine" Quinn said walking out of the room angrily.
You see Quinn and I have been best friends since we were in fourth grade when she transferred from Fairbrook Elementary and she was a completely different person back then as she used to be on the chubby side and shier than she is now. The head Cheerio had a harder time making friends as other saw fit to make fun of her but I didn't because I knew what it was like to be an outcast because at the time I had a thick accent as they would've made fun of me for it if I had threaten most of them with a beat down and I did the same for me. We became fast friends throughout the year before finding out that we were athletic as Quinn got into ballet and I got into modern dance then getting into cheerleading in seventh grade, leading us getting onto the Cheerios but our friendship only got stronger over the years as we promised that we would always be honest with each other.
I had broken that promise by not telling her about my transformation but I thought that I was what I had thought was for the best and I didn't want her to get by my powers because of my lack of control as I don't think I could ever forgive myself if anything happened to her cause of me. I'm pulled out of my thought by something touching my cheek to see that it's Rachel, she's sitting on the bed running her thumb back and forth against my cheek with a concerned look on her face before letting out a content sigh, leaning into her touch before hesitantly taking her hand into my own. I looked up her to see that the diva's not looking at me with fear in her eyes like I was expecting to see but she could have hiding it from me so I wouldn't feel bad cause it's the kind of person that she is as I place a chaste kiss on the back of her hand before trying to sit up again with better luck this time, plopping myself against the throw pillows on the head of the bed.
"Santana, I-"
"Rachel, don't" I said shaking my head. "Just don't okay"
"You don't know what I was about to say" Rachel said crossing her arms.
"Trust me, yes I do and you don't want to know"
"Tell me anyways, I want to know. I need to know because I want to help you and I can't do that if I don't completely understand what's going on with you. Please Santana, let me help you" Rachel said taking my hand in hers.
"There's nothing that you can do to help me, Berry. I'm beyond helping" I said taking my hand back.
"I don't think so. No one's beyond help"
"Just leave it alone, okay. I'm not worth it and you're better off not knowing"
"I think that's my decision to make, not yours and I don't care what you say because I'm going to be here for you whether want my help or not" Rachel said stubbornly.
"God, you're so frustrating and annoying" I said getting annoyed. "Why can't you just leave alone?"
"I know what you're doing, Santana and it's not going to work. I'm not going to let you push me away again. You're stuck with me whether you like it or not cause we can do this the easy or the hard way, makes me no difference" Rachel said slipping her shoes off.
Rachel makes herself comfortable on the posh bed that's able to fit four people comfortably as she curling herself to my side, resting her head carefully on my shoulder as she turns on the plasma screen TV before to random channel that I wasn't paying attention to as the smell of her peaches and crème perfume feels my nostrils. The voice of the wolf side of me is taunting me, trying to persuade me to take what's 'rightfully' mine but I resist it because I don't want to take the diva cause she doesn't belong to me and she never will since she's dating my best friend as that's not a line that I want to across with her.
I don't want to betray Quinn more than I already have and taking her girlfriend's virginity would be the ultimate betrayal that I could commit as I try as hard as can to resist the pheromone wafting off of the singer snuggled up against me when the door opens. My co-captain walks into the room and I could tell that she's still mad but not as mad as she was before as she climbs onto the bed, taking up residence on the other side of me before looking up at me with a angry passive look on her, flicking me lightly on the forehead something she does letting me know that she's not completely angry with me anymore. I smiled slightly as I wrapped my bandaged arm around her and she doesn't push me away.
"Don't let it go to your head cause I'm still mad at you"
"Yeah, yeah whatever you say, Q-ball" I said chuckling.
We ordered pizza while we continued watching a bunch of movies, laughing and making jokes until around three in the morning, Quinn and Berry fell asleep, using me as a body pillow and it wasn't until I knew for sure that they were asleep that I untangled myself from the both of them. I quickly grabbed my shoes before quietly sneaked out of the house, walking down the quiet streets of Lima towards the empty house that I call home, knowing that neither one of my parents would be home or notice my sudden absence since the both of them are surgeons so they work long hours.
I'm mostly home by myself, not that I mind too cause it's stopped bothering me when I turned twelve but it didn't stop the loneliness from creeping up every once in a while but I tent to ignore it because I know that this is something that I have to get used to since I'm always gonna be alone. Eventually we're gonna graduate and go our separate ways then before long losing contact with the people that we promised to stay in contact with then it won't long as they become a distant memory of high school and I know that my co-captain and the diva are gonna to forget about me and move on with their lives.
They'll be better off when they forget about me even though I won't be able to do the same but it doesn't matter what I want cause it never did and it never will. I walked the rest of the way home, walking through the front door as the emptiness of it all closes in on me, almost crushing me as I make my way to down to the basement where my bedroom is, flopping down onto the bed face first. I sighed softly before sitting up to unwrap the bandages from my body as the regenerative powers healed most of my wounds but I still have the scar where St. Douchebag clipped me at, knowing that it wasn't going anywhere. I kick my shoes off, stripping down to my tank top and boxers before crawling under the covers, letting sleep take me or at least it would have if my wolfish side knew where to take a fuckin break and leave me the fuck alone.
You could've done it, you know. You could've had them both right, screaming your name until all neighbors knew it.
I'm not about to do that. I'm not gonna fuckin what's not mine to begin with.
You know that those females belong to you. They're practically ripe for the picking and they screaming for the hills when they found what we can do.
I don't even know what we can do and until I do by getting your furry ass under MY fuckin control, we're not going anywhere them. You hear me, furball.
You're funny, thinking that you can control me but I'll listen… for now but just know that without me, you and your mates would be dead in that forest instead of St. James.
I hear chuckling in the back of my head and I knew that I'm gonna do some serious training if I'm gonna be able to keep Rachel and Quinn safe from myself, luckily tomorrow's or toady's Saturday so no school so I'm gonna get started as soon as possible. Over the course of the weekend, I went into the forest early in the morning and not coming back until nearly midnight until Monday when school started back up, the diva notice that something was off with me but didn't say anything about as I still kept my distance from both girls because I still don't trust myself around them just yet. I continued to put my persona around like nothing's wrong or up as I kept up with my studies, basketball training, cheer practice, Glee practice as well as my power training and to say that I was busy is a hella understatement as I kept this up for nearly three weeks straight and it's starting to wear me down but I couldn't stop. I can't stop now because I need to have complete control over my powers if anyone's gonna be safe around me as I stand in front of newly destroyed oak tree, panting heavily when I hear amused chuckling.
You know that all of this training is pointless. You don't have the know how to control me and all you're just doing is exhausting yourself.
Shut up, ya furball. I'm gonna have control over you if it's the last thing that I fuckin do, you hear me.
I hear ya but all I see is a pathetic human trying to control something that she doesn't fully understand which is quite sad if you ask me.
I'll show you who's pathetic, you stupid wolf.
I feel the power flowing through in a steady stream, waiting for the right moment to strike before launching myself towards another tree and splitting it down the middle with my claws as I stood in front of the tree when I hear something coming me. I turned to see that it's Rachel and Quinn, holding hands with worried expressions on their faces when the diva makes her way towards me and before I knew it, my face is force to one side stringing from the slap as I looked at her with a confused and shocked look.
"What the hell, Berry? What was that for" I asked frowning.
"For pushing me away, I thought that we've been over this, Santana. You're not going to start pushing away again" Rachel said angrily.
"Rachel, you don't understand. I-"
"No, you don't seem to understand that I care about you and I'm going to be there for whether you want to or not because you're precious to me"
"You're not safe around me. Neither of you, not until I have complete control over my powers" I said shaking my head.
"San, I get what you're saying and I don't want to stop you from doing what you think is right but don't push us away" Quinn said taking my face in her hands. "Lets us help you. Make us your strengths, not your weaknesses"
"I don't know if or when I'll lose control. I don't want you two getting hurt because of me" I said sighing.
"You're hurting us more by pushing us away" Rachel said taking my hand in hers. "We love you, Santana and we don't want to lose you"
"God, two are so annoying" I said mockingly.
"Oh look who's talking, bitch" Quinn said smirking.
I chuckle slightly as I pulled the two into a tight hug. I just hope that I'm making the right decision. Lets get to work.
~Nicole The Dragon Rider signing off
The End