At the age of 25, Sashenka was a very successful woman.
Needless to say, her life had not been an easy one.
The reason why she became a whore had nothing to do with freedom of expression.
It was something more sinister, sadder.
In reality Sashenka was a very sad girl.
But all her girls had led bad lives and that was why she tried to make their lives at the brothel a little more livable.
Sashenka was nice to the girls, she didn't overwork them and they got to keep the money they made.
Really many girls wanted to work in Sashenka's brothel.
'Sashenka, why did you become a courtesan?' Kenji asked her one-day.
'What kind of questions are you asking, boy?' she replied, a little angry and a little surprised.
'Please forgive me, I did not mean to intrude.' Said Kenji rapidly, regretting he even asked.
Sashenka smiled at him. The boy had changed. He had been cold and distant towards them, but slowly he had begun to open up to them. He laughed and smiled with them. He seemed to be learning to enjoy life.
'Maybe some day I will tell you.' She finally said, a sad smile playing on her lips.
It was true. He felt different. Ever since he came to live with the girls he felt like his burden was a little easier to carry. He was happy with them. To say the least they were all one big happy dysfunctional family. He knew all the girls had tragic pasts and that made him feel more at ease with his own guilt that burned him slowly from the inside.
The girls showered him with love and affection, but he didn't feel suffocated by it, he learned to accept it. Maybe it was because they were not naïve, or that he knew that they accepted all his faults that he felt their love comforting.
He in turned also learned to love the girls and would do anything to protect them and their happiness, even if that happiness was fake.
"Alexei, are you done sweeping?" Anna asked him.
"Yes, I am done. What else do you need me to do?"
"Shopping." Sashenka cut in.
"O.K. I'm going."
"I'll go with you." Said Sashenka.
He liked all the girls, but he felt especially close to Sashenka. Sashenka seemed like the loneliest girl, even if she put on the strongest front. She was their leader after all. Kenji wanted to be Sashenka's comfort when she had nobody to see her cry, when she could not let the girls see her tears. He didn't want to see her be lonely; it was as if he was seeing a reflection of himself. He'd been lonely all his life and really that was not a nice feeling.
"Sashenka…" he started.
"Yes, what is it Alexei?" she asked him.
"When your lonely and you feel like crying, you can cry on my shoulder. I know that you can't let the other girls see you suffering because you are their support, but I know what it is to feel lonely and I don't want to see you look lonely."
Sashenka turned around surprised. Her baby blue eyes filled with the many tears she had wanted to shed but had held in for the sake of the other girls.
"Thank you, you are so sweet." She told him giving him a hug and crying on his shoulder.
She stayed like that for a while, crying in the middle of the crowded street. People passed and stared at the sight. Some mumbled under their breath, saying bad stuff about the scene, since it was known to many who and what Sashenka was.
Finally wiping her tears, she straightened up. "Thank you. I had not cried like that in so many years. It really felt good." Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes were red, but she didn't care. Somebody had let her cry on their shoulder. Somebody was willing to listen to her.
Alexei was right; she was lonely. Her girls were great, but she couldn't appear weak in front on them.
"I'm only glad that I was able to help you." Said Kenji.
"Sashenka, what happened?" the girls asked concerned when they saw Sashenka's red, puffy eyes.
"Nothing happened." She said smiling.
"But your eyes…they're so red. Alexei what did you do?" Anna asked curtly.
"Stop it! Alexei didn't do anything. He actually helped me out. He freed my heart." She said smiling.
All the girls exchanged glances, but said nothing. Their leader, their best friend looked so happy, happier than they had ever seen her, but that happiness came with a price.
"Were you having problems? Why didn't you come to us?" Anna asked her.
Sashenka gave her a small smile, "I didn't want to worry you. You have your own problems. I had to be strong for you, if I crumbled, who would stand up for you? This is a harsh life we live."
"Stupid. You showed us how to be strong, so you don't have to feel like you have to be strong for us." Kharenka told her.
"Kharenka is right. We are a team, so Sashenka when you are feeling down; don't be afraid to talk to us. You don't have to be strong because we all have to learn to be strong and stand on our own two feet. Sashenka you are not going to be able to protect us forever." Said Anna.
Kenji slowly slipped away from there and went to his room.