Chapter Two

When Anna went, "Castiel. Dean Winchester is walking towards you," Castiel just knew something weird was going on.

He'd been much too engrossed in the folded book in his hands, East of Eden, by John Steinbeck, to notice the absense of sound in the lunchroom, the sudden tension. His fingers tapped on the side of the novel, eyes glued to the words and letters that swam in his mind to weave together a story that was so colourful in his mind, it took that sentence to pull him out of it.

Dean Winchester. Is walking towards me.

He turned around in his seat, resting his book on the table. He raised an eyebrow, because sure enough, here he was, taking long, confident strides towards him, eyes locked onto his.

Castiel muttered something under his breath, eyes going wide.

"Hey, Castiel." Dean called out, when he was merely yards away.

"Hello, Dean." He worked out, clearing his throat. For some reason, he stood. He noticed something determined about Dean's swagger, one he'd never seen in his walk before.

The distance between them was closed; Dean sliced through his personal space and came suffocatingly close to him. He felt an arm take his waist, and his breath seep out of his body.

"I'll explain later," Dean hissed, eyes hard as he surged forward, lips colliding against Castiel's in a beautiful lapse of colour.

To say it took his breath away would be an understatement. Castiel's lungs had suddenly forgetten how to breathe; his muscles contracted, and his feet became instantly numb, rendering him completely still.

The kiss was galaxies away from what Castiel imagined his first would feel like. He'd suspected soft, warm lips, but here was rough, invasive tongue, and he wasn't completely sure he was enjoying it. But then, as if Dean could read his mind, the kiss turned sweet.

Castiel's lips relaxed against Dean's own plump ones. He was vaguely aware of the fact that the lighter haired boy's mouth tasted of cherries and Diet Coke, a taste that sent his taste buds into oblivion.

The whole affair lasted no longer than fifteen seconds, but to Castiel it felt like a lifetime; each swipe of tongue, each brush of cheek making his mind whir with feelings and hopes and lust he'd never felt.

When Dean finally broke away, Castiel pouted. He abruptly remembered that they were in the middle of a slightly homophobic highschool cafeteria.

For a second, their eyes met, Dean's cloudy with an emotion he couldn't quite place, Castiel's blown out wide. Dean quickly composed himself.

"There!" Dean exclaimed, wiping his mouth and shrugging, laughing at his table of friends. "Crowley, it's your turn next!" Confused, Castiel looked, chest clenching as Dean left to join the 'popular table'. The reactions of them were mixed. Most of the guys welcomed him back with playful digust; the girls stared, starry eyed, not even trying to hide their enjoyment.

"What- what just happened?" One of Castiel's, friends, a sophomore named Chuck, whispered.

Castiel shook his head, still numb with confusion.

"Chuck- I don't- I have no idea."

Castiel stood, hurt evident in his stare. Dean risked a glance back, and visibly winced.

He remembered what Dean had said before this, that he would explain later.

He hoped he did.

SPNSPNSPN

While he was putting on a unphased face at his lunch table, Dean Winchester was freaking the fuck out.

He had kissed another guy.

He was okay with that. Really. He was.

His sexuality was nothing more than another part of him; another piece of complicated puzzle that was Dean. He neither denied it, nor embraced it, he was just comfortable with who he was. He just didn't need all the shit from all of his friends if they found out. He'd wait until college, then start exploring.

But this- oh god, that kiss he'd just had- it was downright irresistable.

He'd been surprised he'd been able to stop when he did, especially when he pulled away, and all he could see was Castiel's blue, lust blown eyes, and his kiss swollen lips. The feel of his stubble against his cheek;

The comfort of his waist resting in his arm;

The closeness of him;

The smell of paperback books and trenchcoat fabric;

It was driving him insane.

For the remainder of the school day, he'd been in a sort of blur. He couldn't really focus on anything. He dozed off during Calculus, dreaming of sharp tufts of black hair, and sweet lips to match. By the end of the day, Dean was exhausted, and hungry for more.

As he waited in his car, a 1967 Chevy Impala (referred to by Dean as 'baby' numerous times), he took a moment to breathe. A high pitched noise interrupted him.

He looked down at his phone.

One new text.

Dean, it's me, Castiel. I was wondering if you wanted to meet up at the library, after school tomorrow.

A lump caught in Dean's throat. His heart pulsed.

Meet up?

His phone beeped again.

For the social studies project.

Oh. Right. Dean sighed, typing out a quick reply.

Sure thing see you then.

SPNSPNSPN

"Alright, look, I can explain, man," Were the first words out of Dean's mouth when they met at the library the next day after school.

Castiel looked up, expressionless. "Hello Dean. Yes, please do. I think I deserve something."

Dean sat across from him at the library table, a pile of books inbetween them.

"Okay so my friends and I were playing Truth or Dare-"

"Oh." Castiel looked down, embarrassed he ever thought it was anything else. "Please, say no more, I completely-"

"Wait-" Dean blurted out, before he could stop himself. "I really, really liked it, Castiel."

The confession stunned them both.

They stayed like that for a second. Both boys opened their mouths to say something, but stopped, wanting the other to go first.

Dean laughed awkwardly, hand coming up to stroke his jaw, a habit he developed during uncomfortable situations.

"Okay so, yeah, it was a dare. And I'm sorry I took advantage of you like that, that was kind of a dick move."

"It's fine."

"Right." Dean said. "Okay. Can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

"Are you gay?"

Castiel paused, tilting his head. He took some time, trying to come up with the best answer. He couldn't.

"Are you?"

Dean certainly didn't expect that. "Yeah, I am." He whispered, careful to keep his voice low, in case anyone from their school heard. "Well, bi. But I don't like many people to know."

"I understand. I am pansexual myself."

Dean's eyebrows furrowed together. "What does that mean?"

"Gender does not matter to me."

"Oh. I got ya." A silence emanated between them. "So, I was wondering, if maybe you wanted to make something... out of this." Dean gestured between them.

"What exactly do you mean?"

"Like a friends with benefits type of thing."

Castiel narrowed his eyes still.

"I'm asking if you want to go out with me," He explained, chuckling. "Just not in the traditional sense of the word."

"You want me to mess around with you?"

Dean almost choked on his breath, the bluntness of the statement catching him off guard. He didn't even know Castiel had known what that meant. He looked around quickly, making sure no one had heard.

Nope. Coast was clear.

"Well, yeah.." He admitted, blood rushing up to his cheeks.

"No." Castiel said firmly.

Dean blinked.

What?

He'd never been turned down before. This was definitely a first.

He cleared his throat, eyes searching Castiel's.

"Why? Did I do something to offend you or-"

"Yes, Dean, you did. I cannot believe you would think I would want to be used around like a whore-" Dean cringed at the word. That was so, so far from what he was implying, why couldn't Castiel see that- "just because your friends dared you to kiss me. You don't know a single damn thing about me, Dean Winchester."

Castiel stood up, his expression collected but slightly angry at the same time.

"And I would like to keep it that way. I'll do the project- it's no matter." He looked down at Dean from where he stood, eyes completely unreadable. He picked up the books off of the table, silent as he did so.

"Goodbye, Dean."

Dean watched the gentle swish of his trenchcoat as he left, saying a polite goodbye to the librarian, and not sparing a single glance back. He tried to collect his thoughts but they escaped him, too complex to be understood at the moment.

He stared at the space where Castiel sat moments before.

He tried to ignore the stirring in his chest.

He pretended he did not feel strangely empty.

SPNSPNSPN

"It was his first kiss, you know."

Dean turned, eyebrows raised. Sitting next to him was a red head, with piercing eyes, and long hair.

"Excuse me?"

She extended her hand. "I'm Anna. Anna Novak."

He shook her hand, and then the realisation crashed into him like a freight train.

Novak.

"You're Castiel's..."

"Sister. Anna." He nodded. He looked around the science lab to make sure the teacher, surly old man with a bit of a temper, was focused on something else. He turned back, smiling.

"Right."

"I said, that was his first kiss." She scoffed. "And you stole it from him. Without even asking."

Dean could feel the disapproval reeking from her, and suddenly, the velocity of her words collided into him.

Castiel had never been kissed before.

And now Dean had taken this from him, a special something people stayed up late at night waiting for, praying for. His stomach tangled into knots. Castiel seemed like the type of person that this meant a lot to.

Fuck.

And then he'd gone on and asked him if he'd wanted to basically, fool around with him for nothing. Jesus Christ.

"I- I didn't know..." He muttered, avoiding eye contact.

"Yeah. I figured you didn't. Point is, I think he deserves and apology, or a do over, or something." She paused, lips curving into a tight smile. "I think you're a good guy, Dean. I know you can do the right thing."

Dean took that as – do the right thing or I'll come and find you – and nodded, turning back to his work before his teacher turned around, grimacing.

"Alright, onto the next chapter."

SPNSPNSPN

Can we talk?

Dean set the phone down as soon as he sent the text. He wiped his palms against his jacket. Gosh. For some reason, nervousness made it's way into his mind. He wanted to do right by Castiel. And honestly, he couldn't understand why.

Besides Sammy, there had never been a reason, or a time, to care about anyone else's feelings. Maybe that made him selfish. Hell, he was everything else- worthless, irresponsible, stupid, futureless- might as well add selfish to the list.

He thought back to a few days ago, when they met.

"I don't know if you know this, but I don't actually do this whole… academic bullshit, so I apologize in advance for being a dumbass during this whole ass of a project.

"I'm sure you won't be."

That was probably it, the fact that he had never once judged Dean, regardless of rumours he'd probably heard, or stories he'd probably frowned at.

And at the moment, Dean realised how much that mattered to him.

He was so lost in his cloud of thoughts he hadn't even realised his phone screen had lit up.

Sure. I'll see you in social studies.

Dean read it, biting down on his lip. It wasn't exactly the ideal place he wanted to talk, but it would do for now.

"Dean!" Sam's voice called out.

Dean jumped, forgetting that he wasn't alone in the house.

"Yeah?"

"Dinner's ready!" Dean yelled back confirmation, and then threw the phone onto his bed.

He stepped down the stairs, the smell of pie wafting up to meet him.

SPNSPNSPN

Look I really need to talk to you, Dean scribbled on a piece of paper. He crumpled it up and flicked it in Castiel's direction. It landed square in the centre of his desk.

At Castiel's adorable frown, Dean couldn't help from smile.

Wait. Adorable?

Where did that come from..?

He shook his head as if to shake the thought out, and went back to his textbook. Castiel probably wouldn't even respond; he was too pissed at him anyway.

"Alright now... we move on to the reason the Odyssey is such a great epic poem," Dr. Uriel commented, holding a piece of broken chalk in his hand. He began to write something on the board.

"Why the hell are we learning English in Social Studies?" Crowley said, smirking. Dean had to wonder, too. What's next, math?

"To answer your question, Mr.-"

The paper hit Dean in the side of the head, and he let out a startled laugh.

He froze, cleared his throat, and stared intently at his textbook.

When Crowley and Dr. Uriel continued to banter, Dean opened up the note, which had been carefully folded into a neat square.

I'm not really interested, Dean.

His heart sank.

He wrote a reply, careful not to be seen. He wrote out his entire apology, one he'd gone over in his head a last night, while sleep would not take him. His hand shook as he wrote, and he bit his lip. He didn't know if he could handle this rejection, should Castiel choose to.

"Dean Winchester!"

His head snapped up, pencil clattering to the desk.

"Perhaps you would like to share with the class?" Dr. Uriel asked, and Dean's breath caught in his throat instantly, cheeks flushing a brilliant red.

"Sorry, Professor, I'll just-"

"Read it. Out loud."

Dean grimaced, and then nodded. There wouldn't be a way out of this one. Ruefully, he rose, making his way to the front of the classroom.

"Okay. Um." He glanced hesitantly at Castiel, who looked embarrassed, to say the least. He probably just hoped his name wasn't mentioned, and he'd get in trouble.

"I've been trying to think of a way to say I'm sorry, so I guess this is it." Dean swallowed and continued. "I didn't realise it was your first kiss, and I never meant to take something special from you." His cheeks remained a vibrant red, as he never wanted to sound like such a hopeless romantic in front of everyone. "I've only really known you for a few days, but I thought you were pretty cool, and I want us to stay friends-" Dean quickly skipped over Castiel's name, "but I understand if you don't forgive me. I was a dick to you, and I deserve any shit you want to give me, but I'd really like to be friends, if you'd forgive me just this once."

Dean's eyes fluttered up to meet Castiel's, bright and happy.

Castiel's mouth was turned up in a slight, slight smile.

SPNSPNSPN

"Okay. We can be acquaintances." Castiel said into the phone, leaning against the headboard in his room.

"Normal people answer the phone with 'hello', Cas." Dean teased, though his heart lept in his chest. He was finally forgiven.

Castiel stopped, mind running over the last sentence. "Cas?"

"Oh. Sorry. Yeah, it's just- Castiel is such a mouthful and-"

"No, it's fine. I like it."

"Okay. Good." Dean couldn't help but smile.

"I imagine since we are friends now, we'll be doing the project together. My house isn't... ideal. But yours or the library could work." Dean resisted from asking about Cas' family, and nodded, then realised he couldn't see him.

"Sounds good."

"Alright. Well, it's getting late. I'll be off to sleep soon."

"Oh, okay." Dean desperately tried to coat the disappointment in his tone. "Well then, I guess this is goodnight, Cas."

"Goodnight, Dean."

The line went silent.

Author's Note:

Thank you for being patient; I know it's been a while, haha.

Thank you to all who have been reading/following/favouriting, it's very much appreciated!

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