Okay, looks like people are liking this fic, so here's another chapter! As I'm sure some of you guessed, Ash is gonna be using his life savings during this fic, and if you ask me, he's spending it very well!
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Chapter Two: The Chapter Before the Chapter That's After the Chapter That's After the Chapter That's Before This Chapter That's Before The…um…to put it simply, Chapter Two.

"Hello, May (insert last name here) speaking."

"Uh, yes, this is um…Officer Jenny for the Hoenn police department."

"Oh, hello. Are you okay Officer Jenny? You sound strange."

"Oh, yes, I just have a sore throat, that's all."

"Oh, okay. So, how can I help you?"

"Yes, uh, I'm here with some of my clones at um…the…Slateport…harbor…and, we've got your friend Drew here…and…and he's dead."

"WHAT!?!"

"Yeah, yeah, we killed him…because…he was being stupid…and, we had to shoot him…before he did anything…more…stupid."

"YOU SHOT HIM!?!"

"Yeah, uh…you can come over if you want…there's not much left…we put like, 200 slugs on him…so…yeah. Feel free to come on over and…look…at…your…dead boyfriend. Okay…bye."

Ash hung up the phone and immediately burst out laughing. "WAHAHAHA!!!!! Oh, man! That was great!"

"Pika pika!!!" Pikachu was laughing to.

When they both finally settled down, they looked at each other.

"Well," said Ash, "I may die in 80 minutes, but at least I'll die laughing."

"Pika…" pikachu hung his head.

"Hey," said Ash, putting his hand on pikachu's tiny shoulder, "listen. When I'm gone, I don't want you to do anything stupid, like kill yourself. Believe it or not, I'm going to give you to Gary."

"Pika?"

"I know he's my rival, but he's also one of my best friends. I would give you to Misty, but I think it might be a bit strange having like, 100 water pokémon and only 1 electric one."

"Pika…" pikachu seemed to be thinking.

"But, hey!" Ash got up. "We've still got more than an hour till we gotta say goodbye! Let's make the best of it!"

"Pika!"

"I don't care if you're going to die, Ash, that was still very immature."

Ash turned around to see Dawn and Brock standing there behind him. Dawn was looking at him with disapproving eyes.

"Maturity is overrated," Ash replied. "And now I've done two of the things I need to do before I die!"

"I don't even want to know what the first was," Dawn said.

"SCREW YOU, ASH!!!"

"Huh?" The group turned to see Paul glaring at them, with a broken, bloody nose.

"Oh."

"But hey," said Ash, "I'm not done yet!" Ash took out his cell phone and dialed a number.

"I thought you just did a prank call!"

"I'm not doing that!" Ash put the phone up to his ear.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Sabrina, it's Ash."

"Oh hi, Ash! By the way, I never thanked you for bringing me back to normal."

"Well, could you start by doing a little favor for me?"

"Okay, what do you need?"

"I need one of your pokémon to teleport me somewhere."

"Okay, where are you and where do you need to go?"

"I'm in the pokémon center in…um…where are we?"

I dunno. Uh…Indianapolis. You're in Indianapolis.

"I'm in the pokémon center in Indianapolis, and I need to go to the grand canyon. Oh, but first I need to go to the bank, and a Target®. So first bank, then Target®, then the grand canyon. Think you can you do that?"

"Sure. I found a ralts in the woods the other day. It doesn't seem to like it here, actually. I think it's scared of all the other pokémon. It's really good at teleporting, though, and I think it would like it with you, since all your pokémon are so friendly. I'll send it over."

"Okay." Seconds later a ralts appeared beside Ash.

"Thanks," Ash said.

"Say, Ash, what do you need to go to the grand canyon for?"

"You'll see." Ash closed his phone and put it back in his pocket. He bent down to ralts. "Hey there, little buddy," he said. "I'm Ash, and this is Dawn and Brock. And this is pikachu and piplup."

Ralts just kinda stared at them all for a few moment, then looked at pikachu, who gave him a thumbs up. Ralts smiled.

"Ralts!"

"Okay, then," Ash said, getting up, "think you can do me a favor, ralts?"

"Ralts!"

"Alright, I need to go to the bank. Then I need to go to Target®. It doesn't matter which one. I just need to get something. Think you can teleport me and pikachu there?"

"Ralts!" The next thing Ash knew, he was inside a Target®.
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"Why do you think Ash wanted to go to the grand canyon?" Dawn said to Brock.

"Hopefully to jump off." Paul had walked up to them. His nose had stopped bleeding now.

"Oh, come on," Brock said, "even you should know you deserved it."

"Brock!" Dawn scolded.

"Well, he did!"

"I bet you losers are just jealous."

"Excuse me?" Dawn was starting to get pissed off, which is like saying a the fuse on a bomb was starting to burn. "Why on earth would we be jealous of you?"

"Uh, cause I'm way better than all of you," Paul said, as if this was obvious, which it really wasn't, seeing as he had a "Kick me" sign on his back (guess who put that there).

"Want another broken bone to go with that nose?"

"Woah! Dawn!" Brock had to hold Dawn back from pummeling Paul.

"You're all pathetic."

"Okay, now I'm gonna let the bull loose." Brock let go of Dawn and she walked up and kicked Paul right in his…well, in his special place.

"Oh my god!!!" Paul backed away, clutching his crotch. "You're all psychos!"

"Yeah, that's right!" Dawn yelled as Paul retreated. "You run away!" Then Dawn and Brock noticed people crowding around a TV in the lobby.

"What's that all about?" They pushed their way to the front of the crowd. The usual redhead newsgirl was standing on of some kind of cliff.

"I'm here live," she was saying, "where 14-year-old Ash Ketchum is about to be the youngest person ever to bungee-jump off the grand canyon!"

Dawn and Brock gasped.

The woman walked up to Ash, who was looking over the edge, but didn't seem to be hesitating at all. "Now, Ash, what's motivating you to do this?"

"Well," Ash said, "I figure seeing as I'm gonna die in…" Ash looked at his watch. "75 minutes anyways, there's really no harm in risking my life."

"You're going to die in 75 minutes?" The newsgirl said, looking alarmed. "Why?"

"No time to explain," Ash said. "Alright." Ash checked his bungee cord to make sure it was on tight. "I'm going down in three…two…one…" Ash jumped.
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"WOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!"

Ash could feel the air whipping through his hair. If he had known it was this great all along, he would have done this years ago.

He was falling…falling…he didn't care if it stopped or not.

Then, all of the studding, Ash's fall started to slow. There was a huge jerk, and Ash was rising back up. It was like the opposite of falling-and it was.

Ash was rising up into the air. He looked down and saw that he had just passed the place where he had jumped off. Cameras and people were staring up at him.

After going for a bit, Ash took out a pokeball.

"Alright, gliscor," he said, "let's end this." Ash threw the pokeball up into the air and out came gliscor. Ash had told him what to do already.

When Ash stopped rising, gliscor got right under him.

Then, when Ash fell, he landed on gliscor's back.

"Alright," he said, "now I've done three of the things I need to do before I die." Ash raised his fist into the air. "Onto the fourth!"

And with that, Ash and gliscor sailed off to their next destination. Wait a minute, Ash…didn't you forget something?

"Pika-pi! PIKA!!!"

Pikachu gave up. Ash had forgotten about them.

"Pika pi pikachu pika pi pika chu pika! Pika pi pika! (That stupid son of a bulbasaur! He forgot us!"

"Ralts! Ralts ralts, ralts ralts. (don't worry! I don't know where he's going, but I can get us back to the Indianapolis Pokémon Center.)"

"Pika pi. (Good idea.)"
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Alright! That was fun, wasn't it? So, what will Ash do next? I won't say what it is, but I'll tell you one thing: It's gonna be hilarious! See you guys in the next chapter!

-Fwingsnitch =D