Hi there! I decided to update early for several reasons.

1) I hate making people wait, especially if I have things prewritten and ready to go.

2) I loved this chapter so much - it was honestly my favourite to write - so I could not wait to publish it.

3) Today was the first day of filming of "The 100" season 5! I am WAY too excited for this, so I had to celebrate somehow. PS - if you haven't, go check out their set photos from today (The 100 Writers Room on Twitter post them all).

Note: once again, some darker language in this chapter. Not much at all, but just a heads up!

Thank you to all of my reviewers! I really appreciate it!

Enjoy!

Ashes

Chapter 2: Run

Clarke groaned. The pain she felt was overwhelming. It was more than she had experienced in her whole lifetime.

She felt like she had been burnt everywhere. She could feel her protective suit was lined with thick blood – the suit not allowing it to seep through to the other side. She felt like she was just swimming in it. Her nose stung. It felt like she had shot liquid out of it, much like she had done when Wells told a joke back on the Ark. This time, it felt as if it was lava that had shot out of her nose, not water. It hurt. Her throat was dry, probably from the smoke that lined the air. Her legs ached, just like they had after she worked out too hard, and her arms hurt. She could almost feel bruises forming around her body. The worst of it was her head. Her head was pounding and the memories were extremely fuzzy.

God, what was going on?

She must've hit her head sometime. Possibly a concussion? With short term memory loss? She wasn't too sure. Regardless, it was obvious that her mind was not as sharp as she would've liked it to be at that moment.

All Clarke had clearly begun to remember was where she was. She was on the island, in Becca's lab. Based on the cool feeling of tile under her back, she deduced that she was laying on the floor.

Clarke also remembered those fateful moments leading up to launch.

She remembered speaking to Raven with Bellamy. She could feel the panic and fear in her stomach, almost like it was a hole trying to swallow her whole. She remembered turning to Bellamy, needing his support to be able to push through. Clarke remembered the bad feelings growing in the back of her mind, screaming at her to listen to them.

For a brief moment, she did. Raven's visions came true, would her mother's? Would she die from radiation poisoning?

Clarke remembered talking to Bellamy. She remembered admitting her fears to him about dying. He looked so broken, almost as if those thoughts had hurt him too. He managed to say the right words to calm her down, as always. He listened to her suspicions and provided comfort.

After Raven had explained their job to them, Clarke couldn't remember much more.

What the hell happened? Why wasn't she in space? Where was everyone?

It was clear that Clarke had been left behind. How was that possible? How had that happened? Why did she survive Praimfaya?

A million questions ran through her mind, but there was no way to get answers in her current state. She felt trapped in her own body, without even her mind to provide information. It was almost like she was back in the Sky Box; sitting in her cell, no human contact, no information on the world outside those four walls provided to her, wondering what was going on and if anybody was fixing the system failures.

She never wanted to feel this way again.

Curiosity and concern got the best of her. She needed to know what was out there, despite the pain it would bring to her head. She needed to find out what happened.

Reluctantly, she opened her eyes, but found that her visor was crusted over with a thick layer of black blood, with the exception of the busted corner near the top of the helmet. It was impossible to see out of the glass. The blood was so thick that light didn't filter through.

What the hell did she do to cause so much blood to escape her body?

The substance must've come from her mouth, as she could taste the unforgettable taste of blood on her tongue.

Metallic and salty.

She swallowed hard, feeling as though she might be sick. The taste was hard to escape, as the blood had filled her mouth not too long ago. She could taste it between her teeth.

Why was there so much blood? Why was she so hurt?

Her tongue was hard to move. It felt like she hadn't had anything to drink in ages. Her lips were cracked from her rough breathing and the dry air. Her throat was raw from breathing in the dust particles that hung in the air. Along with many other parts of her body, her lips were covered with a crusted layer of dried blood.

Clarke was thankful that she did not lay in total darkness. A single corner of the visor lay untouched by the dark blood, allowing some light to filter through. Clarke assumed that the corner would have been covered in blood, just as the rest of the visor had been, if it had not been smashed in.

From what she could tell, the outside world looked like a tornado had swept through it. She could see dust floating in the air, along with large pieces of ash. The air still carried the scent of burning wood and electrical fire. It must have been nighttime, as it looked fairly dark outside. That, or the ashes from the wave of radiation were in the sky, preventing the sunlight to reach the ground.

She was reminded of the time before humans on Earth – the time of the dinosaurs. They had been wiped out from the asteroid that caused a constant cloud of dust and ash that surrounded the planet. Sunlight could not penetrate the cloud and a large majority of the plants had died, taking the large animals with it.

Clarke hoped that this new Earth was not like that. She hoped that it was simply nighttime. If it wasn't, she hoped that the ash would clear quickly. If a similar disaster could wipe out such ferocious beasts, she could imagine what it would do with a petty human.

Clarke was scared. She pushed down her fears and focused on taking note of the damage done to her body.

Everything hurt.

Not only did her whole body throb, but it was clear that a piece of glass had slashed her forehead. She didn't know how old that gash was, but she could still feel the warm liquid pumping onto her cold skin.

She shivered from the temperature difference.

Her skin was so cold and clammy, covered in burns. The hot blood trickled down her forehead, spilling into her hair. She could feel it run down her neck and blinked furiously when it dripped into her eyes.

Clarke reached up to rub the top of her head, where she felt blood oozing from. As her gloved hand passed in front of the cleared portion of glass, she saw it was covered in red blood.

What the hell happened?

What happened that caused her so much pain? What did she do to get so burnt and so cut up? How did she lose so much blood?

Clarke closed her eyes and focused on the last moments she could remember.

The rushing wind. She could hardly move as the winds roared around her. Her voice got lost to the rushing air, sucking it away from her before she could even hear herself speak.

The darkness. The wave of death had finally reached Becca's lab, extracting the light out of the air. Fire roared around her, removing all traces of life from the land around her. The trees turned to ashes – the wave of fire and darkness was unforgiving.

Fear. She could clearly remember how her fingers tingled with adrenaline and how her face had gone numb from the lack of oxygen. The blood was rushing through her ears and her heartbeat felt erratic. She felt like she was falling, even though she felt her two feet planted on the ground.

Running through the woods. The branches whipped past her, smashing into the glass that protected her face. Her arms stung from the violent whips, even though they were covered by the protective suit she wore. Her boots slid across the icy ground, the snow flying in every direction as she tried to gain balance and speed.

"Bellamy!" She remembered screaming his name. The wind, the darkness, the fire, the fear – all were put behind her as she remembered him. She could still feel his name on her lips, as if she had been calling his name for hours on end. Just before the death wave hit, she pleaded to him. She pleaded for his love. She pleaded for his forgiveness. She pleaded for him to live.

The memories rushed back to her. They still felt foggy and unclear - she couldn't remember the details. Yet, she felt them. She could feel the distant ghost of absolute terror. She could taste his name on her lips. She could feel the darkness hovering over her, encasing her in a cloud of fire and ash.

Even though she didn't feel like her life was in danger, she did not feel safe.

She swallowed hard.

What the hell happened?

Clarke closed her eyes tightly, focusing on those final hours.

The trees whipped past their faces, branches hitting the glass covering their faces. Clarke was thankful that she was wearing the protective suit. Without it, not only would the radiation have killed her, but she would've been slashed by the trees around her.

Neither Bellamy or Clarke said anything during their race to the tower. Clarke chanted the satellite name over and over, under her breath. She refused to have the slightest hesitation on the name. If she forgot one tiny detail, it was all over.

Bellamy panted out short breaths, cursing the gods for being unable to wipe the sweat from his face. It kept dripping from his curls and into his eyes, causing them to sting and his vision to blur. He could feel it trickling down his back, driving him mad. It felt like it was a form of torture.

They knew they had to hurry, but the blinding panic had not set in yet. Bellamy was confident that Clarke would be able to realign the satellite. Clarke was confident that Bellamy would be able to work the tech.

They felt safe with each other, equally as sure that the other would succeed.

Yes, they were in a rush and a panic, but it was not consuming them. They allowed their minds to wonder to other things. Happier things.

All Clarke could think about was their future. While her legs were crying out in pain, her heart thudding, and her lungs burning, she kept pushing forward. She thought about how their whole plan rested on her shoulders.

Well… Their shoulders. She glanced at Bellamy, who had kept the same pace as her.

She knew from experience that he could move faster than her – he had such long strides. Yet, he had stayed behind with her, at her pace. Part of her loved the fact that he had held back to be with her – that was her heart speaking. More sensibly, she wanted to yell for him to hurry the hell up because they didn't have a moment to waste. Clearly, that was her brain. Usually, she gave in to that part of herself, but refrained from doing so at that moment. Just being beside him brought her so much strength and comfort, she would be crazy if she were to give this up.

Not too long ago, she had told Bellamy that to be a good leader and a good person, he had to use both your head and heart. She felt that she had used her head too often recently – she wanted to use her heart. So, she kept her mouth shut and allowed Bellamy to stick by her side.

She couldn't help but think of their future. While she was panicked and scared, she couldn't peel her thoughts away from the time they would spend together on the Ark. Earlier that day, she had almost said it.

She had almost told him that she had fallen for him. She had almost whispered those three simple words.

I love you.

Clarke wasn't sure when that had happened. When did he go from the person she despised to the person that understood her best? When did he go from an enemy, to an ally, to a friend, and now to the love of her life?

She didn't care. She didn't care about pinpointing the exact moment she had changed her opinion and feelings towards Bellamy. All she knew was that he was one of the most important people in her life. Hell, he was probably the most important. He held a large part of her soul. He was a large part of her heart. Of course, she loved her mother and she loved her friends, but Clarke was aware that she was willing to sacrifice them on so many occasions.

But she was never willing to sacrifice Bellamy.

The time the Mountain Men had bombed Tondc and Clarke had known about it, she was willing to let hundreds die to keep Bellamy safe. She had hated herself for it afterward, but it was clear that her choices under pressure were to keep him safe.

Clarke also thought of the time Roan had held the knife against Bellamy's throat. That was the first time she had seen him in three months. He had come for her and her heart was so full of love for him. Plus regret. There was a lot of regret for leaving him. The fear and desperation she had felt for Bellamy as Roan threatened to kill him broke her. Out of everything she had been through, that was one of the most horrifying moments of her life. The idea of losing the man that had been right beside her, through everything, had shook her.

Clarke could not get the the bunker out of her head. She remembered standing at the base of the stairs, pointing a gun at Bellamy as he reached towards the release of the door. He wanted to be with his sister – he wanted to save all of those people. He wanted to be fair. All she was concern about was saving the human race. She wanted to save her own people. She was afraid that if she opened those doors, anarchy would break out and the remaining people of the human race would be wiped out from poor decision making. As he reached for the lever, she had a choice.

Kill him, ensuring the survival of the human race. Or, let him live and risk humanity.

That day, she sacrificed the entire population of Earth to prevent her from shooting him. She sacrificed a whole species.

She loved him. He held a peace of her soul. It was clear she would always pick him first.

They had been through too much together. He was the closest person to her. They had their misunderstandings and their disagreements, but they always got back to each other. It was almost as if their souls had been brought into the world with the lone purpose of meeting again.

Clarke snuck a glance at the man running beside her. The pack hit is back every time he took a step, rattling the technology inside. His eyes were set on the snow under their feet, trying his best to keep a solid footing. He looked so focused.

Clarke usually wouldn't have been so drained from running such a short distance, but the snow was making her use muscles she had never used before. Running in the snow was an impossible task. It looked like Bellamy was struggling too. His cheeks were flushed, his breaths were short, and his arms were out to help balance himself.

She glanced down at the watch on her wrist. 14 minutes left until they needed to launch.

"Shit," Bellamy gasped. He had glanced at his watch too. They both slowed their steps so they could analyze the tower approaching their view. It was extremely close. Clarke estimated that it would only take them another two minutes to get there, leaving two minutes to realign the satellite.

"We have plenty of time!" Clarke responded. She didn't even believe herself. Her voice wavered and she bit her lip. They never had plenty of time. Bellamy was thinking along the same lines. He cursed Chronos, the Greek God of time. Why was he never on their side? Bellamy turned away from the tower.

He took a precious moment and stared at Clarke. She was red and sweating – both from fear and exhaustion. Her hair was stuck to her face and her eyes kept flicking around their surroundings, taking it all in. Even with all of this chaos, she was still beautiful.

"Come on." The both took off sprinting in the direction of the tower. His heart was breaking. They had T-minus 14 minutes to get to the tower, realign the satellite, and make it back to the rocket for launch. He had a sinking feeling in his stomach – one telling him that 14 minutes was not enough.

He was scared.

He didn't want to lose any of his friends. He didn't want to leave a single person that he cared about behind. He refused to spend the next years of his life, sitting up in space, imagining their skin bubbling and blood flowing out of their mouth. He would not think about how the life would flow out of their eyes. He would not imagine their bodies laying on the cold floor of Becca's lab or in the snowy forest. He refused to think of their bodies being hit by the wave of death – turning their once joyous faces into a pile of dust.

All he could think of was Clarke. No matter how hard he tried, his mind was filled with images of her gory death.

Bellamy felt sick. He loved her so much. It began as the platonic love, but slowly burned away to a red-hot I'm in love with you love. She was his world, just as Octavia was. He had loved Octavia and his mother so much growing up, but that was it. He was hardwired to love a small amount of people in a large way. She was his head. The words had basically passed through her lips earlier that day.

He pushed the images of her dying out of his mind. He straightened himself, a cold look coming onto his face.

"You should go back," he simply said. His voice was firm – it was an order, not a suggestion. Clarke's eye widened and her mouth opened the slightest. She stumbled over her two feet as they raced across the forest. Before she could fall, he caught her arm and straightened her. "This is really only a one-person job. I can do it alone." Clarke glared at him and batted his hand off of her bicep.

"Don't do this, Bellamy," Clarke said, her tone harsher than expected. He was surprised at the amount of venom in her voice. She sighed, looking guilty for snapping at him. "Sorry. I just… You're stupid if you think that I would leave you now." Her words struck him. One part of himself felt ecstatic that she refused to leave him to do this job alone. Together. Just like always. The other part of him cried out – he did not want to see her hurt. The further they got from the lab, the more danger they were in.

He managed a smile.

"I had to try." Bellamy was sure that his smile came out as a grimace. He was willing to sacrifice himself, but not Clarke.

Never Clarke.

By the time they reached the tower, their watches read 11 minutes and 43 seconds until launch. They both glanced at each other, fear in their eyes. This job would've been a quick and easy one, if it was done by someone who knew what they were doing. Clarke knew that they would waste time fumbling with the cords. As Bellamy said earlier, they were not the best choices for this task.

"Sat-Star-One," Clarke reminded Bellamy. Her voice cut in and out, static echoing through their headsets. She realized that the wave was close – the radiation was already impacting their technology, just as Raven had predicted. Clarke hoped that she would not lose contact with Bellamy. Trying to communicate with someone without the headset was near impossible. She forced her fears down – now was not the time.

Without wasting anymore time, they both took off towards the base of the tower, where a panel of plugs was clearly visible. Clarke's leg fell into the snow, throwing her whole body off balance and nearly sending her tumbling down the hill. Thankfully, she was quickly pulled to her feet by Bellamy. This time, he didn't let go of her shoulder and she did not bat his hand away. His fingers dug held her suit tightly, pulling her closer to him. She took comfort in physically feeling that he was right beside her. They rushed towards the panel, ignoring the clock ticking down.

Bellamy ducked under the metal beam that supported the tall tower, releasing his hold on Clarke's shoulder. She rushed in after him. The thoughts of their future, her past, and the comfort of the man she loved were long gone from her mind. It was almost like a switch had flipped – she was solely focused on the task at hand. Saving her friends.

While still running, Bellamy shook off the bag from his back, allowing it to fall right into Clarke's waiting hands. She ripped it open and began to rummage through the many pieces of technology that filled the backpack. God, they all looked similar. While she was digging, Bellamy flipped opened up the panel and began searching for the correct plugin. Clarke removed the disk from the bag and thrust it into Bellamy's hands.

"Here! Sat-Star One," Bellamy muttered, pointing to one of the ports. His voice crackled with static. Clarke tried to ignore the breaks in his voice. She tried to push down the fear that the crackles brought to her. Please don't lose contact. Please don't lose contact. That was her one fear – losing contact with the man that stood beside her. "Hand me the cables!" Clarke dove back into the bag, rummaging for the corresponding wires. She pulled them out, handing one end to Bellamy. She plugged the correct end to the computer Raven had given them, while Bellamy worked on plugging the correct wire into the satellite. "Ready?" He held the plug centimeters above the correct port on the panel. His hand shook the slightest bit, but there was no other evidence that he was frightened. His jaw was locked and his lips were tight.

"Do it!" Clarke urged, her breathing still strained. He nodded and took the circular piece, jamming it into the satellite.

They both held their breaths as lights flashed and the computer processed the new connection. The seconds that ticked by felt like hours. They didn't have time for this. Clarke glanced down at the watch.

Time was going by too quickly.

"Dish not aligned." The harsh words shook Clarke to her very core. Red lights flashed with the corresponding message. Bellamy was frozen to the spot, his muscles tightening.

"The fuck?" he breathed in astonishment. His eyes were wide and it felt as if his heat had dropped to the pit of his stomach. Clarke shook her head, panic setting in as well.

"What did we do wrong!?" she cried. Bellamy took a step away from the panel, his head shaking, and Clarke took his place. She unplugged the cable, twisted it and plugged it back in.

The same message and flashing lights appeared.

"No!" Clarke cried out. "No, no, no, no!" She was so frustrated and so afraid. She attempted this several more times, each time hoping for a different result.

Bellamy felt like he couldn't move. It didn't feel real. Time was flying away and their survival was slipping through his fingers. His friends were going to die because of him.

Clarke was going to die. His eyes flicked to the woman that held his heart. Her eyes were focused on the control panel, trying anything to get the screen to read a different message.

The fear he felt broke him out of his trance.

He would not fail.

"Damn it!" Bellamy swore. He fell to his knees and began digging in the pack. He was hoping that there was another similar cord – one that Clarke had missed. He was hoping that Clarke grabbed the wrong cord. He was hoping this wasn't real. He was hoping for an easy fix.

There wasn't.

Seeing no easy solution, he felt like he was spinning out of control. He had no idea what to do. How could he save his friends – people he now considered to be his family? How could he fix this situation?

He felt sick.

"Radio Raven!" Bellamy called from the ground. Clarke stumbled away from the panel, gripping the radio in her hands. Her head spun. This was not happening.

"Raven! Please tell me you can hear me!" There was no response, but Clarke pressed on. "Something went wrong. We did everything you said, but it isn't aligning!"

All that came back was radio silence.

Clarke had a sneaking suspicion that the radiation had already impacted their radio so much that they would not be able to reach the group at Becca's lab. It was only a matter of time until it took out the communication system between Bellamy and Clarke.

She let out a frustrated groan, her head slumping in defeat. Bellamy got to his feet again, taking the radio away from the panicking girl.

"Raven, how do we fix this? What do we do?" Bellamy closed his eyes and rested the radio against the screen that protected his face. He wasn't even sure if these messages were sending. Could she hear him? As seconds ticked by without an answer, he felt alone. It was just him and Clarke, miles away from their friends and miles away from their salvation. They were going to die. All of them. "Clarke, what do we do?" She didn't respond. Bellamy opened his eyes, searching for her grey ones. Their eyes met. Bellamy recognized this expression – it was one that he had seen so many times. Her face was one no longer filled with panic. She looked determined and strong. Where Bellamy knew he should find fear, he eerily found composure. "Clarke?"

This was the mask she wore when she returned to camp after killing Finn. This was the look from Mount Weather, right before she reached for the lever. This was her expression moments before she began the blood transfusion with Ontari.

This was the look of someone protecting her heart. This was the look of someone doing what was right for their people.

"You need to go." Her voice held no room for arguments. She was strong, set on her thoughts.

"What? No!" Bellamy snarled. "We're in this together." He took a long stride towards her, taking her shaking hands in his. "As always. We will do this together." Clarke looked like she wanted to argue, but she didn't say anything straight away. They held each other's gaze for a long moment. Her mask had slipped off, revealing the anguish and dread underneath.

"Bu-"

"Don't waste time – I'm staying," he insisted. She removed her hands out of his, crossing her arms across her chest in frustration. Just like Clarke, his eyes conveyed the seriousness of his statement. He was not leaving. Not without her. "Let's get this done. What's your plan?" Clarke let out a long breath, her face falling back into stone. Bellamy felt a similar stone expression fix onto his face and he pushed every emotion away from his mind.

"Manual operation," she admitted, pointing to the poster beside the plugs. "I will climb to the top. I'll have to align it myself." Bellamy glanced down at his watch.

It hit 10 minutes until launch.

He shook his head, his heart hammering in his chest. She was crazy. She would not have enough time for this.

"No. There's no time. We have to go now." He reached for her hand, but she moved out of his reach. Clarke glared at him.

"Go where, huh, Bellamy? Either this thing gets fixed or we die. We all die. Don't you understand?" Bellamy felt anger flare up inside of him.

"Of course I understand!" he cried out, letting his emotions get the best of him. Tears welled up in her eyes.

A single moment passed.

"I won't make it, Bell." Clarke's voice cracked and a lone tear escaped her eye. He growled in response, ignoring the pain he felt in his heart.

"Don't be stupid, there has to be-"

"There is no other way!" Clarke screamed. Tears were falling down her cheeks now. All Bellamy wanted to do was wipe them away.

But he couldn't. Damn those suits.

"Clarke, please." His voice broke. "I – I can't lose you." He took a step towards her. "You can't do this. Please don't do this."

"You can't tell me what to do, Bellamy!" Clarke intended to say this venomously, but she couldn't. She knew these would be her final moments with him. She couldn't bring her heart to snap at him. Instead, she broke. She felt her straight face falter, her chin quivering. She unplugged the computer from the control panel and stuffed it into the bag. "I'm doing this. You need to go back." She lifted her head up to face him. Their eyes locked. "Please, Bell. I don't want to lose you either." Bellamy laughed, his voice filled with pain.

"You have got to be kidding me! Do you know what you're asking me?! You're asking me to live without you! You're asking me to leave you behind to die! How am I supposed to live knowing that I could've saved you!?" A million emotions ran through him. All he knew was the he loved her and he would not leave her behind.

"I'm choosing this for myself," Clarke insisted. "This is my choice! I bear it so they don't have to."

"This is my choice too, Clarke!" Bellamy argued. "I bear it so you don't have to alone. We are in this together."

"No!" Clarke snapped. They fell silent, each breathing heavily. Bellamy didn't know what to say to get her to stay, Clarke didn't know what to say to get him to leave. "Bellamy, you can't, I-"

"I love you!" Bellamy cried out. Clarke fell silent, her face filling with shock. Bellamy was sure his face mirrored hers – he was just as shocked as she was that he had admitted his love. "I love you, Clarke. I am not leaving you to die alone. We are doing this together." Her eyes were still wide with his admission. She didn't move from her spot and her eyes were locked on his.

Bellamy knew she loved him too. She didn't have to say the words. She had shown it through her actions over their time together. The pointed looks. The soft smiles. The light touches. The constant worry for the other. The hugs. The words exchanged.

She didn't need to say anything.

He already knew.

Without another word, Bellamy picked up the radio.

"Raven, if you can hear me, leave. Do it now. We aren't going to make it back." He glanced at Clarke. A beat passed. "Don't wait for us," he said, sealing their fate. With those simple words, Bellamy gave up any hope of surviving. He was going to die. Clarke was going to die. He felt his mouth go dry.

At least they would be together.

He felt as if he had cheated death long enough. Too many people had died – too many people that didn't deserve death.

He deserved it.

Bellamy grabbed the pack from Clarke's hands, stuffing the radio inside. He swung it onto his back and began to walk towards one of the legs of the tower. He would do this without her.

"Let's do this together," Clarke said, echoing his thoughts. She walked up beside him, her face hard as rock – void of emotion. Yet, as Bellamy glanced at her eyes, he could tell.

I love you, too, they seemed to say.

They took another moment to stare into each other's eyes before they broke apart. There was no time for their goodbyes. There was only time to fix the satellite and save their friends.

Even though she never replied, Bellamy knew. He knew she loved him. That was good enough for him.

They began to climb.

I hope that you enjoyed this chapter. Like I mentioned it before, it was so much fun to write. I hope you guys enjoyed reading it just as much as I did writing it!

A few closing notes:

1) I absolutely adore Bellamy's love for Greek mythology. I've always been a fan of Greek myths, so I try to use this as much as possible. I thought I should just point out Bellamy's constant referral to "gods" and mentions of specific deities.

2) I also wanted to mention that, while writing this chapter, the script from 4x11 had just been released. This script included the scene where Bellamy has just reached the switch to open the bunker doors and Clarke pulled the gun on him. There is lots of mentions on Clarke's relationship to Bellamy in this scene. If you haven't read it, please do so (it's a great Bellarke read - it can be found on The 100 Writers Room Tumblr). I read this script and it inspired some things in this chapter (Clarke mentioning that Bellamy holds a piece of her soul).

3) I just wanted to point out that in one paragraph above, Bellamy mentions that he refuses to leave any of his friends behind because he would spend the next several years imagining their deaths and suffering. I wanted to point this out because I was thinking of the actual plot line of the show when writing this... Bellamy is totally sitting on the Ark, thinking about how he left Clarke to die. Haha. I hope the feels just hit you.

4) I tried to play on the head/heart speech Clarke gave in 4x13 in this chapter. It's a beautiful scene and I wanted to pay homage to that.

5) Also, I wanted to mention that one of Clarke's biggest fear in this chapter is losing contact with Bellamy... Hahahaha. I hope people caught on to this paragraph. I was hoping to hit the feels with this one too because Clarke DOES lose contact with Bellamy in the show FOR 6 YEARS. Juuuuuuust saying.

I hope everyone understands why Clarke is snappy and harsh in this chapter. I think she would try her best to push Bellamy away, trying her best to save him. Even though she was harsh, she isn't trying to be rude. She's just trying to save him, in the quickest and easiest way. I hope this makes sense and that you guys understand my reasoning behind her words and actions. I debating on changing it, but I just felt like it fit with her character.

I'm not too sure on my next update, because apparently I can't hold a consistent schedule. It'll for sure be up in one week, but most likely it'll be earlier. Keep your eyes open! If you want to be notified as soon as I have posted, put me on alerts or put this story on alerts!

Once again, thank you to all of my reviewers, favourites, and followers. The support on this story has been great - thank you again!

Please give me some feedback! I absolutely love reading opinions. As I mentioned before, this is my first multi-chapter fic for this fandom. Let me know how I'm doing! I appreciate all reviews. Feel free to give me feedback in a review or a PM. Both are lovely.

Thanks for reading. See you soon!

Paw